(A/N - Thank you to everyone who has written such kind reviews! And thank you to those who asked for updates, I did this as quickly as I could but it wasn't an easy chapter to write I had to re-do it about five times. Let me know what you think)

Chapter Three – Innocence and Guilt

Montfermeil 1819

Enjolras sat on the tree and waited staring down at his feet. Had it only been a year since he had been here last it felt much longer. He was only nine but he no longer felt like a child he spent most of his time trying to make sense of what had happened in the past few months. Like the day he had realised he hated Pére.

"You can't keep punishing me for her mistakes" Mére had shouted drawing Enjolras attention to the slightly open door the dining room.

"You are not fit to speak her name" Pére had bellowed his face turning purple.

"I have done everything you asked of me" Mére's eyes were filling with tears and she held out her hands towards her husband in a pitiful attempt to get him to come to her. But he turned his back and she placed her hand on her swollen stomach.

"Why can't you love me?" she whispered.

"Because you're pathetic"

"For loving you, for trying my hardest to do everything I could to keep you happy." Mére hesitated slightly but then continued "She didn't even want you!"

Pére had crossed the room in three strides and struck her across the face catching her off guard and sending her sprawling across the floor. Enjolras had run into the room as fast as his legs would carry him pumping his little fists into his father's chest but a child stood no chance against a grown man and his father simply pushed him aside as he walked out of the room. Enjolras had gone to his mother's side but she didn't seem to notice him. He called her name but she didn't listen she got up and left the room without a second glance leaving him standing alone.

He had known almost instantly that he would never forgive Pére but it was Mére walking off that had hurt his little heart the most. In the months that had passed he had spent too much time wondering what Mére would have said if she had chance to explain it all to him. But he had learnt in the past year was that life was cruel and the future was not guaranteed. She had gone to bed straight after the incident with Pére. Enjolras closed his eyes trying to stop the memories from flooding through his mind.

Screaming, that was what had woken him from his sleep. Horrific screaming such as he had never heard before, it had been Mére he had known it almost instantly. He had run to her room but the door was locked. Joséphine had been arguing with Pére.

"Please Master, you need to get a doctor the baby is coming and it's far too soon. There shouldn't be this much blood"

"I will not waste my energy fetching a doctor for a useless woman who can't even keep a child in her belly." Enjolras heard his father's footsteps departing.

Joséphine started as she rounded the corner and saw him standing there, she hesitated for a moment looking into his face but she nodded to herself seeming to have made up her mind about something.

"Enjolras, your Mére is very unwell. Do you know where Doctor Beaufort's house is?"

He nodded.

"You must run there as fast as you can, tell him that the baby is coming and nothing can stop it. Tell him to come quickly, don't take no for an answer."

Enjolras hadn't wasted a moment he had run out still in his night clothes. He had run all the way to Doctor Beaufort's house by the time he arrived he was panting for breath. He had slammed his fists against the door and stammered Joséphine's instructions at the surprised doctor as soon as it was opened. The Doctor was old and struggled to keep up with Enjolras pace which had frustrated the small boy. He pulled the doctor by the hand but it was all to no avail, his mother and the baby were dead by the time he got back.

His eyes were stinging behind their lids, he felt the familiar prick of threatened tears and took a deep breath, closing off his heart from the pain and stopping the tears. He hadn't cried, not when it happened and not since.

"Big boys don't cry"

That's what Mére had told him once and he would make his mother proud. That was the one thing he was most determined about, if it took him his whole life he would find a way to make Mére proud.

He had slowly been closing off every emotion. It was the only way he could cope with the pain and the crushing guilt.

"If you hadn't come running into the room she would never have got so upset and none of this would have happened."

He hated his Pére but he knew he was right it was all his fault she had looked so upset as she had walked away from him that day. Joséphine had told him Mére was watching him from heaven and he would show her, one way or another, how sorry he was that he had upset her. He missed Joséphine almost as much as he missed Mére but she had been sent away. Pére had declared that he could no longer bear to look upon the face of his son and would send him to school but when it came to it he could not part with him. Enjolras knew that this was not because of any kind of affection on his father's part but because although he took no real interest in him he needed to keep a close control on his life and so tutors had been brought in. Enjolras threw himself into learning and found a solace in his studies that he had not expected, it had become the only thing that got him through the dark days, that and the thought of Montfermeil and his friend Eponine.

She was running towards him now with a smile on her face which disappeared the moment she took in his black mourning suit. He jumped down from the branch to meet her. She ran faster and threw her arms around him. For the first time since his mother's death he felt relief.

~X~

"I want to come with you Ponine" Azelma was standing with her arms on her hips. Both girls had learned to mimic their mother.

"You can't come"

"You just don't want to share your friend. It's no fair you haven't played with me for two whole weeks since he arrived."

"Play with Cosette" Eponine was tying her bonnet strings under her chin and preparing to leave.

"Eww, what would I want to play with her for. Even if we were allowed, which you know we aren't Mama says so. I want to come with you."

"Well you can't today and don't ask me why because I haven't got time to explain. You can come another day."

"Mama" Azelma cried childishly.

Eponine ran, she knew Mama would make her take Azelma with her and she couldn't, not at the moment.

Once she was a safe distance from the inn she slowed down to a walk and looked at the pink mark on her thumb. The cut she had used to become Enjolras' blood sister last year had become infected. It had swollen up and been very painful and when it had finally gone down left its mark on her young skin. She rubbed it as she thought about the last two weeks. Enjolras had been serious last summer but he was even more so now, almost not like a child anymore she did her best to encourage him to play like they had last year. It was like he was learning to be a child again and she couldn't have Azelma coming along just when she was making progress.

She saw him waiting for her sitting on the branch of tree his legs swinging his eyes had a faraway closed off look the one that Eponine hated, she had to get him out of it she ran towards him reached up and grabbed his leg.

"Your it" she laughed running off, glancing over her shoulder to make sure he had taken her bate. He smiled, looking nine again instead of ninety and jumped down chasing after her. Eponine knew he was much faster than her so she had to use her knowledge of the woods to her advantage. She darted in and out of the trees trying to lose him, laughing as he nearly caught up with her and she spun round and ran off in a different direction. She could hear him laughing which spurred her on.

He caught up with her his hand reaching out to tap her shoulder, she tried to get her feet to go faster but tripped over them, he tried to grab her to stop her from falling which resulted in both of them tumbling to the floor much to Eponine's amusement. She rolled onto her back laughing till there were tears streaming down her face. He was laughing as well, the slightly worried frown he seemed to permanently wear was absent entirely from his face.

She rolled up onto her knees and began plucking the grass blades from the ground. She remembered something she had heard Mama and Papa talking about the previous night.

"Your Grandparents have new neighbours from England"

"Yes they moved in last week." He copied her plucking the grass blades at his feet.

"I think I might move to England when I am a lady."

"Why would you want to do that?" He sounded genuinely puzzled.

"So I can marry a prince silly" she laughed.

He just looked at her "Why would you want to marry a prince?"

"So I can be a Princess!" She raised her eyebrows at him surely he had known the answer was obvious.

"You do know that the English king is mad" He raised his eyebrow at her, she responded by throwing her plucked blades of grass at him.

"What would I care so long as I was a princess? If I can't marry a Prince" she tapped the side of her cheek as she considered the thought seriously "Then I will marry a Bourgeois naturally, a very rich one so I can have lovely things or anyone with a lovely big house. Or maybe I will marry you, but only if I really can't find anyone else." She expected him to laugh but the serious expression came back across his face.

"I'll never get married"

"What not even to me?" she cried.

"No, I never want to marry anyone."

Eponine was genuinely shocked, why would anyone not want to get married "But if you don't get married, you will never have a family or a house or a wife. You will never even get to kiss anyone."

"I don't want to kiss anyone, why would anybody?"

"Because it's special and romantic and Mama's novels she reads say that it is the most magical thing and you knees go weak and your head spins and it makes the whole world lovely. Everyone wants to be kissed." She cried with childish enthusiasm.

"Well I don't, I don't want to get married or get kissed" he said getting to his feet.

"You really are the most serious boy I ever met."

"I don't like it when you call me that and I don't want to play anymore" he said turning to leave.

Eponine bit her lip as she watched him walking away, indecision was filling her mind but her young romantic heart got the better of her she grabbed his hand so that he turned around she reached up and pressed a quick kiss onto his lips before turning around and running all the way home. Her cheeks burned bright red but at least Enjolras wouldn't go his whole life never kissing anyone that would have been too terrible.

~X~

Paris 1832

Montparnasse was passed out in the corner. Eponine had known exactly what he wanted the moment he came in and she had been quick witted enough to pour him several glasses on Papa's strongest whiskey. Thankfully it had done the trick and he was too drunk to function before he could attempt to make any advances. She pressed her fingertips to her lips. It had been a long time since she had thought about it properly but she was always grateful for her first kiss with Enjolras. It had been pure chaste and innocent everything that her life now was not…