Tick... Tick... Tick...
Anna stretches her arms across her desk and watches the clock tick the time by. Her laptop, open to a blank document, couldn't even entertain her right now. She barely even registers what her teacher is saying. Something about childhood psychology floats into one ear and out the other. This is her only late night of the week. What happened with Elsa over the past few days is weighing heavy on her mind.
First the weed, then the drinking, now she's self-harming, and having mental breakdowns at dinner.
The more she thinks about it the more she worries. She plays with her phone in her lap, glancing at it, and considers texting Elsa. She spins the phone in her hand and unlocks it.
No, she's at work, she's not going to answer.
Locking her phone again, she starts typing on her computer. Her fingers swipe across the keyboard typing everything that pops into her skull. She keys in, 'Boooooooored', hits enter, 'OMG let this end plz', and continues on in this fashion. She lifts her head and glances at the clock.
Only twenty more minutes of this... Oh my god, Mr. Weselton you can make the most interesting things sound so boring...
Her thoughts drift from topic to topic, keying in random words as she goes. Eventually, her brain finds its way back to Elsa.
Maybe I'll just leave her a message... Who knows, she might need a pick me up, and see it when she checks her phone for the time.
She picks up her phone again, unlocks it, and types in, 'Hey Els, just wanted to make sure you're al-', and deletes it. She starts again, 'Hi Elsa! Just thinking about you and didn't know if you maybe needed a pick me-', then deletes it again. Trying again, she types, 'Elsaaaaaa, I miss you! Want to do something after you're done with work? I want to make up for last-', and deletes it a third time. She lets the phone fall out of her hands, lies on her outstretched arms, and curls them around her head.
Everything I want to say just highlights last night, that is probably the last thing she wants to be reminded of.
Her hands stray back to her computer. She continues to free type while her mind wanders. Everything seems so new about her sister, like she's meeting her for the first time. Not sure where she stood in Elsa's eyes, something about the past few days furthered her endearment for her sister. Anna shifted in her seat, fidgeting every so often, and wearing her boredom on her sleeve.
Ugh, I feel so stuck! I love how close we've been the past few days, but if it's at the cost of her being miserable...
Anna frowns at the thought of Elsa upset. Her heart beat sped up a bit.
Why isn't she happy? Why can't I make her happy? I want to be the one to make her...
Overcome by mixed feelings of guilt and embarrassment, her face flushes and she bites her lip. She swaps topics in her mind and thinks about the night Kristoff brought her home. He was carrying her so gently.
She was so quiet, so peaceful... I wonder if they kissed before. I wonder if they held each other. I wonder-
Catching herself again, she shakes her head, trying to push the thoughts of Elsa out for anything else, and glances at the clock.
Five more minutes of this droning and it's over.
A quick glance around the classroom confirms that she is not the only one waiting for this class to end. Three people asleep, two blatantly playing games on their computers, and ten others clearly staring at the clock. Sighing, Anna turns her attention to her computer, now full of random words and sentences. The slight blush on her face intensifies as she reads what she's typed. A few jump out at her, 'Elsie and Annie', 'I miss your face so much', and 'can we hold each other like that every ni-'. She slams her laptop shut, drawing the entire class' attention. They all stare at her for a second, just worsening the growing heat around her ears.
Mr. Weselton clears his throat sharply pulling the class' attention back to him. "I guess that's enough for today", his voice still droning. He closes the book in his hand, stares down his long wide nose at them, and derides to the class, "I expect you all to be prepared for the exam next week." He grabs his bag and rushes out of the room, ignoring someone raising their hand with a question, slamming the door shut behind him.
The others around her slowly gather their things. Anna doesn't move. For being so hot to leave less than a minute ago, her body refuses to get up. One by one the classroom clears out till Anna is the only one left. Hesitantly, she pulls open her laptop again. She combs over the full page of text. The more she reads, the more in detail and intimate it gets. Her face is scarlet with embarrassment. For a moment, she thinks someone is playing a joke on her. That someone hacked the public wi-fi and typed this while she was daydreaming. How could they know which computer was her's, or who she was thinking about. Her imagination ran wild for a few minutes. She catches herself thinking about spies hacking into her computer instead of the mainframe to the college, and when they figure out it isn't, they enter information to confuse her. She sighs at herself.
You dork, that is the most ridiculous thing ever... No one is hacking your computer. You wrote that yourself when you weren't paying atten-
Every word spins around her head as realization sets in. Everything in front of her are her own thoughts and sentiments. The feelings welling in her chest flip her stomach. Each confusing notion bouncing in her head, laced with guilt. She stares at her hands trying to find any explanation.
Did I really write this..? I wrote all this about...
Anna's face, an even darker red than before, twists and strains as she struggles to comprehend what she just put to paper. She thinks back to holding Elsa and singing random little songs the night before.
How Elsa always put her first.
How Elsa never let her go wanting or astray.
How when they were alone for the first few weeks after their parents passed, Elsa looked for a job, was strong, and kept her head high, when all she could dowas sit in her room and cry.
She was the same,wasn't she. She hurt so much every day but she put her duty to our family… to me, first. She is such a hero.
She remembers every little detail, every painful day filled with bitter loneliness, demoralizing sorrow, and crushing heartache, and Elsa sat with her through it all. She wouldn't leave till she had kissed her better.
I love my sister… She is my entire world… But do I... love my sister..?
Shaking her head, she ponders about how Elsa's become more and more distant over the years.
She always loved me. When our parents were too strung out to take care of us, Elsa did. Whenever Mom promised it would be different, Elsa would accept the apology and keep moving. Then when Dad would fall off the wagon and drag mom with him, there was never an 'I told you so' or a 'it's happening again'. She would just… Love us… No wonder she's hurting herself…
A sharp pain cuts deep in her chest. It hurts to admit, but Anna knows that Elsa is the one person that she can always count on.
So she should be able to count on me!
Her words give her confidence.
They make her heart melt.
They stop the pain and replace it with a warmth, a warmth that grows every time she thinks about Elsa.
Glancing back at the screen, all the intimate words, the loving ideas, the eager wording, are less embarrassing.
It's comfortable.
It's marvelous.
It's... Euphoric.
Letting her emotions go, Anna feels a pull of jealousy in the back of her mind. Drifting towards the night Kristoff carried Elsa home, and the day after talking with her sister. It seemed… Off.
The more she thinks about the way they talked about each other that night, the stranger she realizes it was. Her eyes roll from one side to the other.
It's my fault… I shouldn't have made her be the hero all the time. She saved me every time I needed it, but I was never there to save her… I never even knew when she needed saving.
Her heart beats fast in her chest. Thinking about Elsa causes new and exciting reactions from Anna's body. Some of the ideas that leaked through her fingers cross her mind again. 'Elsie and Annie', reverberates through her brain. Her lips curl into a huge dorky smile. Everything is wonderful in that moment. Each time the words bounce back and forth in her head, the warmer she gets. She lets her restraints go again.
I want to hold her every night… I want to sing to her every night… I want her to come home smiling, take a shower, and kiss her to-
Something pops back into her head she had disregarded till then. Last night, when Elsa was in the shower, Elsa called out her name. But there was something… different... in Elsa's voice...
Something caring.
Something passionate.
Something... lustful.
Without meaning to, Anna squeezes her legs together. The heat spreading in her chest reaches through her body. Slight confusion and a bit of guilt follow the warmth everywhere it stretches. Anna gasps and her eyes slam shut. Against better judgement, she continues to rub her legs together trying to snuff the pressure building inside her. Her eyes open and fall upon her unconscious desires in her laptop.
Elsa's voice calling out her name replaces the, 'Elsie and Annie', playing again and again in her head. Hanging on every written word, each more suggestive than the last, she reads her feelings again and again. Her legs rub together a bit more rapidly, everything around her fades away as her mind starts to go blank.
She clasps her hands together as they roam down to her lap. Biting her lip, she imagines Elsa in the shower. Something comes over her as she thinks about Elsa, her body reacting to the wet and soapy image. Her legs grind together desperately as she tries to relieve her discomfort.
"ANNA", she hears Elsa's voice in her ears.
Her eyes fall shut.
"ANNA", her imagination takes over, increasing the lewdness in her voice.
Biting her lip harder and squeezing her hands together only enhances the the heat between her legs. Her fantasy picturing Elsa holding her hands and nibbling on her lips.
"OH, ANNA", Elsa's voice, alight with desperation, blooms in her head. She releases her hands and caresses the inside of her thighs.
Oh my god… More Elsa, more…
The heat burns between her legs, every attempt to snuff it out only manages to spread the wildfire burning inside her fingers wander closer and closer to her center, until her thumbs gently graze her crotch. The lust inside her almost boils over at that exact moment. She leans down placing her head on the desk, panting. She bottles up her emotions, trying her best to contain the loud moan desperate to escape her throat. The room is spinning, her body begs for Elsa's cold hands to cool it off.
Her hands stray even further as she started rubbing herself through her pants. Her vision blurs through the haze and she starts to fiddle with the button on her pants.
She needs to feel it.
She needs release.
She needs Elsa right here and now.
The button finally gives way and her hand slips just under her waistband. A moan slips past her lips as the cool outside air slips into her panties. A shiver rolls up and down her spine, it reminds her of Elsa.
Her fingers work their way down, and with one last image of Elsa she pushes her hand the rest of the way. The restrained moan breaks free as the pleasure from just touching herself courses through her veins.
OH GOD! Elsa! Touch me, love me, fuc-
Her fantasy cuts off as the door to the classroom rattles. She rips her hand out of her pants, sits straight up, and slams her laptop shut once again.
The door opens as a janitor walks in. He grabs the trash can and without even looking around the room walks right back out.
Anna gulps down heavy breaths and she tries to comprehend what just happened, as her heart thunders out of control.
Reality sets in as she figures out just what she was doing, where... And who she was doing it to. How little reluctance and hesitation she felt, scares her. Her eyes focus and stare into the distance. Everything about what she is thinking and doing is wrong.
Why did it feel better than anything else I've ever done?
She is so entranced by her conundrum, she almost misses her phone ringing.
She checks the phone and finds a number she's not familiar with. Hitting accept, she steadies her breath, "h-hello?"
A mans voice rings through the receiver, "Hello, may I speak with Ms. Anna Kaldt please?"
"This is she", Anna replies hesitantly.
The man says the most terrifying words Anna has ever heard, "Hello Ms. Kaldt, I am calling from Arendelle General Hospital. I'm afraid I have some bad news about your sister..."