Chapter XII

After the first seconds of surprise, Aramis could not help but kiss her back. He rested his weight on his right arm to keep from crushing her. Her lips were soft and warm, and her mouth still tasted like alcohol. Elise's hand, now free from his grip, touched his arm timidly. She had no experience and did not know what she was supposed to do. She lost herself to the kiss, enjoying the way her body warmed up at his touch. It was the first time she'd left like that. She did not want it to end.

"You're playing a dangerous game," Aramis eventually warned her when they broke apart to breathe. Opening his eyes, he remarked her sparkling gaze and the white teeth smiling from under the swollen lips. He cast away a wavy lock of hair that had fallen on her face.

"Who said it was a game? I'm not playing any game."

"Why did you do this?"

"Because I wanted to. Do I really need another reason?"

"I do not want you to be hurt, Elise. And I think the person you like is not who I really am."

"How can you know what I think? Are you in my head?" She propped herself on her elbows to be at his level. Aramis tried to decipher what was going on on her face; too many emotions at the same time. He could not be sure of anything, and he certainly did not want to make a mistake. He doubted that the Captain would be understanding on that matter.

"Of course not but..."

"I know that I feel better when I am around you, when we talk. Besides, I have seen much more than you believe. I know you are a great and devoted soldier, be it to your country, to your friends or to strangers. I know you will do your duty no matter the risks, even if your own life is threatened. I know you are loyal, and caring, and compassionate, and funny, and gallant, and gentle. You are a great doctor, you are devoted to God. Do I need more reasons?"

Aramis was looking at her with bewilderment. She sounded so honest. He had to smile.

"This is one of the best descriptions someone has ever made of me. I'm flattered."

"I'm only speaking the truth." Aramis touched the tip of her nose with his finger before lying down next to her, sighing.

"You will be the death of me, Elise. I've been trying to elude you specifically for this reason. It was not because I did not want your company anymore. It was because you were growing too fond of me, and I couldn't have that. You don't want this life."

"I've been liking it. It goes without saying that I would prefer to be in Orléans with my parents, but since this life has been stolen from me...I have found happiness here, where I least expected it."

"One month isn't a lifetime, Elise. And there have been no important missions. Believe me, no woman likes waiting anxiously to know if the soldiers will come back alive. Your uncle will not want to you have this insecure life."

This time, she was the one sighing. She sounded frustrated.

"Must we really talk about my uncle? He isn't here yet. I am. Or do you want me to leave?"

"No!" He grabbed her arm as she made to stand up from the bed. "I'm happy you're here as well. I really am. It brings me so much solace, you have no idea. I'm only concerned with the consequences." His friend would have been proud of him for thinking this way as it had not been his first priority in the past. Recent mistakes had led him to painfully rethink his way of action. At the same time, he could not let a young girl like Elise ruin her reputation. Not after everything she had been through.

Elise only heard the first part of his answer. It reassured her that he enjoyed her presence tonight, at least she had not made a fool of herself. Her mind flowed with warm feelings and she reached once again for his mouth. Aramis had little self-control, especially knowing how tired he was. They would worry about the consequences later. He lost himself to the kiss, his touch rougher than he would have liked.

Her arms tentatively sneaked around his neck. His hand caressed the soft skin of her shoulder, moving more carefully when he grazed her long wound. Her body twitched under his.

"What is it?" he asked against her mouth. "What?" She had mumbled something he could not understand.

"It itches so much it tickles." Aramis smiled, and he felt a smile form on her lips as well. His mouth left hers to kiss her cheek, the side of her neck, then her injured flesh. Elise shuddered. No matter how much she enjoyed this, she could not let it go too far. Even now, she remembered her mother's lessons on how to be a lady.

"Stop," she said reluctantly. "I love kissing you, but I... can't do anything else," she added so quickly that Aramis barely understood her. Had she just lost him by rejecting him? She could not bare to look at him so she closed her eyes, feeling the blush radiating from her face.

"Of course, just kissing. For now." He could understand her struggle. She was so young, and so innocent. Her mother may have taught her some things, yet, she clearly knew next to nothing about relations between a man and a woman. Nevertheless, she had enough common sense to not lose herself to the first one to come.

"Aramis? Would you mind if I slept here tonight?" He raised a questioning eyebrow at the suggestion.

"Believe me, I would like nothing more. Is it what a lady should do, though?" He saw her blush even more.

"I just want to sleep. You should not be alone and I'm so happy this evening I want to share it with you."

"You've already made me feel better, Elise. I'll greatly appreciate the company, especially as lovely as yours. You're welcome to stay. I'll sleep on the floor."

They spent most of the night talking. Elise felt so at ease with the Musketeers that she told him many of her secrets, sharing precious moments from her childhood. Aramis had always enjoyed listening to her, and tonight was no exception. She looked so lively, the shadow of the terrible attack a distant memory. He could almost forget about his son, being deeply interested in the most simple details of her life.

Then, it was his turn to tell her about he joined the Musketeers. He shared some of his most chivalrous moments, making her laugh with his adventures with Porthos and Athos. Too many secrets had to be left unsaid, but he could not believe how easy it was to speak with this girl. It was effortless. The words ran between them, crushing invisible barriers.

Aramis ended up being the first to fall asleep, his head on her shoulder. Elise kept on brushing his hair for a long time before she realized the soothing gesture had had the expected effect. He finally looked peaceful. There was no worry or concern on his face. She was quite proud to think that she was partly responsible for it. As far as she was concerned, she was not tired. Too much had happened in this room, and she could not manage to stop the whirlpool in her head.

There was a silly smile on her face. A small voice was whispering that she was not doing something good, that she should leave, and that she should not have come in the first place. When she looked at the sleeping Musketeer, all of these warnings seemed unjustified. How could he hurt her? She put her arm around his chest and closed her eyes, engraving the moment in her memory.

She must have dozed off, because when she opened her eyes again, there was a small ray of sunshine on her face. Elise squinted, struggling to get her bearings until she remembered where she was. There was still a strong Musketeers sleeping soundly by her side. She rejoiced in the warmth of his body. She was as hot as she could be on a summer day. Sleeping in the same bed as someone else was not something she was used to, and she had not disliked it.

Aramis's face was serene in his slumber. If she had managed to make him forget his troubles for a few hours, it was already a victory. She did not want to wake him up yet. Instead, her eyes landed on the two necklaces he always carried, resting close to her hand. Curiosity caught the best of her, and she gently grabbed them, turning the golden cross between her fingers. It was a true work of art. She wondered who had given it to him. It was an incredibly elegant piece of jewellery. It must have been made for a woman. At the thought, Elise felt jealous. She had never been jealous because of a man. Aramis had quite a busy life, she could not forget it. What was going to happen to her? Would he discard her when he lost interest?

She dismissed the unhappy thought, focusing on the second necklace within her reach. It was slightly bigger, but it still looked like it belonged on a woman. There was a small lock to open it. Elise held her breath, hoping the noise would not wake him up. What she found inside greatly intrigued her. There was a lock of dark hair, and a miniature of a small child. A child who looked a lot like Aramis. Her eyes went from the sleeping face to the miniature, trying to make sense of what she was seeing.

There was only one possible answer: Aramis indeed had an enormous secret he did not want to share with her. She did not know how she felt about it, and she did not wish to be here when he'd wake up any more. Her discovery had washed away the joy and contentment she felt. Without making a sound, she stood up from the bed, and left the room.