Tina sat in math class, her last class of the day and her least favorite. Zeke sat next to her in the back row. Tammy always blamed her farts on Tina in math, so no one else seemed to want to sit next to her.

"So you figured out who gave you them letters yet?" Zeke asked.

Tina sighed, "No, not yet."

"Ok. J Ju just wanted me to ask you if you know who he is yet. You know, so we can wrestle him, like men."

"What if it's from a girl?"

"What? No! Why? Are you into that? … I don't mind."

"Well it's like straight people tell gay people all the time, 'how do you know you don't like it if you haven't tried it'?"

"You raise a good point Tina. But I think it's a guy. Most people aren't as comfortable with their sexualities at 13 as you are. What with mainstream media and all."

"Yeah, I guess."

"My uncle Billy Ray didn't tell us he was gay until he was 43. I can't imagine what kinda hell he was in, living a lie. It woulda really hurt him."

"That's really sad Zeke."

"Yeah, but he's happy now, got himself a boyfriend named Duke. They're going to Canada to get married soon. Looking for a surrogate mother so they can have kids. Things are looking up for Billy Ray."

"If you want I'll ask my mum if she can be a surrogate."

"Thanks Tina."

Finally, after a long math lesson, the school bell rang. Tina was relieved to finally be going home. She could ask her mum about the admirer; Linda always knew the right thing to say.

"I better go," Zeke said, "got detention. See ya Tina."

"Bye Zeke." Tina called after him, slowly picking up her books. Suddenly a piece of paper fell out of her things. It was folded into an origami love heart. "Another one? How?"

"You probably gave it to yourself," Tammy's cruel voice called out as she left the classroom, "LOSER."

"It's a picture of a Zombie riding a horse. It says 'I drew this for you cause I heard you like them. I'm sorry it's not good, I'm not good at drawing'."

Tammy ducked her head back into the classroom doorway just to insult Tina again, "No one cares about your stupid pretend secret admirer Tina."

Gene and Tina stood at the front of school talking. Louise left school shortly after.

"You're not in detention Louise?" Gene asked.

"I went there after class, but Mr. Frond had to go home because his injuries were too severe. So I have detention when he gets back."

"That's good." Said Tina, "You can help me and Gene figure out who this is from while we walk home from school."

"Oh please no," Louise complained, "do we have to?"

"It'll be fun." Gene said, as the trio began walking home, "It'll be like we're investigators. I'll be Sherlock, I can deduct things, probably, Tina can be Watson, she has band aids in her back pack so she's kind of like a doctor, and Louise you can be…"

"Moriarty."

"Okay… Watson what evidence do we have?"

"We have two poems," Tina answered, "and in math I found a picture they drew me."

"I can deduct that the person who sent you these love notes, is artsy." Gene stated.

"Also Zeke said it was a boy."

"So we can deduct all the female suspects."

"Isn't Peter Pescadero good at drawing?" Louise questioned.

Tina replied, "The drawing wasn't of Peter's high quality."

"So Peter is of the list of potential subjects." Gene declared, "Now who at our school can't rhyme, we can take them off the list."

"Lenny DeStefano can't rhyme." Louise noted, "Remember when he tried to rap?"

"It wasn't surprising," Gene asserted, "white people can't rap."

"What about Iggy Azalea?" Tina asked.

"Don't speak of her in my presence." Said Gene.

Tina argued, "But she's kinda good."

"NO TINA, SHE'S NOT! Her existence completely discredits the Australian hip-hop industry. HILLTOP RULES, IGGY DROOLS!"