A/N: Plus France x Seychelles? And France x England? And England x America? Screw it, any extra pairings in here are said and done. I have no idea what I'm doing. It's late. I'm going to go to bed now. BTW, sorry for the late updates. Y'know, school and all.

It was a nice evening. It was sunny, and only slightly chilly. There was supposed to be a full moon that night. And as an added bonus, the sheep from the last few chapters were busy training their newly acquired army of honey badgers to attack, so they would be busy for awhile.

Seychelles decided that it would be fun to go out and eat. It would be a nice chance to spend time with England. Also, that way, she could get out of paying.

England thought that eating out was a good idea. Ever since his chef went crazy from listening to the "Gummy Bear Song" too many times, it had been hard to get a decent meal. Besides, this was a good chance to pay a debt.

"What do you mean that you want you want to invite Mr. America along?" Seychelles asked, confused. "It's been so long since we've been on a proper outing, and I wanted to spend time with you."

"I know, darling," England sighed. "But, you see, I had accidentally dealt him a grave injury a few nights ago, and I promised to buy him dinner sometime to make up for it. I'm afraid if I don't do it now, I'll forget all about it."

"Fine," the female nation sighed "but won't it be a bit awkward?"

"Well, why don't you invite one of your friends along?" England suggested. "That way, everyone has someone to talk to."

"Alright, then," Seychelles agreed. She wrote down the address of the restaurant she had in mind and handed it to him. She then went off to find her dinner guest. She had somebody special in mind.

"Seychelles, what are you doing here?" France asked, surprised. "Forgive me for my appearance, but I wasn't expecting company. I was actually about to search the lake for mermaids. That may sound odd, but you won't believe half the things I've found in there."

"That's alright, France," Seychelles responded. Actually, the nation didn't look half bad in a wet suit and snorkelling gear. "Anyhow, I came to invite you to dinner with me-"

France's hopes rose.

"-and some other people."

And those hopes were quickly dashed.

"Seychelles, ma chère," he began, sounding exasperated "as much as I would enjoy your company, I do not believe it would be wise for me to be around others. Especially in a public place. I might put people off their food."

"Oh, come on, France, it will be fine!" she argued. "Besides, we'll be eating with England and Mr. America. They're used to you enough to be able to eat."

France weighed his options. Dining with his nemesis and his annoying friend didn't sound very appealing. But on second thought, this could be a great opportunity to cause some mischief. And the mermaids could wait for another time.

"I believe I'll accept your invitation," he said. "Shall we go?"

They all met at the restaurant an hour later. They had all dressed in good evening clothes, because everyone knew that fancy clothing repelled sheep.

England's eyes widened as he saw Seychelles' guest. "Seychelles, why is he here?" he demanded.

"Well, because she invited me," France answered smugly.

"I gathered," the nation snapped. "But why him?"

"Well, I was going to invite Canada, but he went to visit a platypus farm with some ballerinas," Seychelles informed them. "Yeah, I didn't get it either."

"Can we just try and eat dinner like civilized people?" America asked. "I know that's asking a lot from you guys, especially coming from me, but..."

"Don't worry," France said cheerfully "We'll be on our best behaviour."

"Yes, quite," England murmured. "What exactly is this place anyway?"

"It's called Wo Men You Shamenshijun," Seychelles explained. "It's supposed to serve Chinese food. It's all the rage in the city."

"Sounds tasty," the American man said optimistically.

When they went inside, they were quickly shown to a table in the back. It was if the waiter expected trouble from them. Especially the one with the insane eyebrows who was glaring at everyone in the building. He didn't like the looks of the one with glasses, either.

England sat by Seychelles, and France sat by America.

"Hm, this place is so tacky," France scoffed. "I've been to China, and it was nothing like this."

"Oh, stop your eternal complaining," England scolded. "Here comes the waiter." Seychelles and America ordered noodle dishes, America ordered sweet and sour chicken, while France ordered a small bowl of rice. He did have a figure to keep, after all.

While they waited for the food, America told them a story about how he slayed all the dragons in Mazanderan. England looked like he wanted to protest, but ended up just sighing and shaking his head.

Things didn't get much better when their food arrived. The only cutlery they were given were chopsticks, which they had never used before.

"Um, what do we do with these?" America asked. "Do I wind the noodles around them?"

"You use them like this," England said and demonstrated on how they were used.

"Where did you learn that?" Seychelles asked.

"In China, of course," England answered, trying not to sound annoyed.

"Oh, so you actually ate over there?" France asked, laughing.

"Oh, shut up, Barthélémy," the English nation snapped.

"Your human name is Barthélémy?" America asked, shocked.

"Yes, it is. I believe I've already told you so, once," the nation answered stiffly, offended.

"Well, yeah, but I thought you said it was 'Francis'," he replied sheepishly.

"Well, I suppose that explains all those holiday cards I got from you that were addressed to 'Francis',"Barthélémy mused.

"Leave it to you to make that sort of mistake," England laughed. "How many French frogs do you honestly think are named something like 'Barthélémy'?"

France, sick and tired of the other man's taunts, swung his arm in order to stab him with a chopstick. Unfortunately, England used his ninja skills to push his arm to the side, deflecting the blow. And so the ill-fated chopstick landed in America's eye.

"Ah! Oh, dear, sweet, Pikachu God! The pain!" he yelled.

"Oh, sorry!" France apologized.

After bandaging the wound and receiving a few bribes from the owners so they wouldn't sue, they went back to eating quietly. England discreetly stole some of America's noodles just to irk the younger man. Seychelles' appetite was ruined, but she decided to eat anyway.

The waiter came back and handed them small cookies. He then backed away slowly, keeping them in his sight until he turned the corner.

"Hey, there's paper in here," Seychelles observed. "Let's see, it says 'Beauty and wisdom are seldom found in the same person.' Oh, it must be saying I'm one of the rare ones, who are both beautiful and intelligent!"

"Mine says 'It was sunny today'" England read. "Hm, so it was."

"Mine says 'Your face is your fortune. God help you.'" France read. "Well, isn't that just lovely."

"...Mine is blank," America said. "What does this mean?"

"Oh, I'm sure it means certain death," England said jovially. "Or perhaps it means that your future will be just a blank, empty, meaningless void. But, then again, what's new?"

Before a fight could break out, the waiter came back with the check.

"Alright, who's paying?" France asked.

"I thought you were," Seychelles stated.

"No, I forgot my wallet," France said.

"I assumed that since you invited me, you were going to pay," America said. They all turned to England. He sighed and pulled a small smoke bomb out of his pocket.

"Alright, on the count of five, everyone run."

Earlier that day….

Sometimes, people could tell it was going to be a bad day as soon as they woke up. England was getting this feeling.

The day had started out as normal. He woke up, ignored the feeling of impending doom, washed his face, and then dressed in a nice suit. After he ate the breakfast his butler made him, he answered the numerous letters from fans who were wondering who the hell he was dating. But that's where the normalcy stopped.

There was a sudden knocking on his door. Which was odd, since he didn't usually have visitors, at least not at the door. America preferred to use the window or the chimney...in the middle of the night when everyone was asleep, dressed as Santa Claus, even when it wasn't Christmas. Especially when it wasn't Christmas.

From his kitchen, he heard his butler politely inquire the name of their guest, only to hear a choked gasp and a thud in return. He quickly rushed to check on his servant, who he saw was unconscious. He then turned to the visitor. It took a few moments to recognize her.

"Seychelles?" he asked. "What are you doing here?" He had never seen Seychelles act this way. Maybe because she was new to the Tom Hiddleston fanclub, which met in the park every Tuesday.

"You have to help me," Seychelles begged, panic in her voice. "I was just on my way to buy some new binoculars since the mutant swordfish burned my old ones, and these freakin' mimes came out of nowhere. I mean, they didn't actually say anything so I'm not completely sure what their intentions were, but they were making some very threatening hand gestures."

"But, why did you come to me for help?" England asked. He also wanted to ask how the small nation knew where he lived, but then decided he was better off not knowing.

"Us Hiddlestoners gotta stay together!" Seychelles declared.

"True, true," the Englishman agreed. "How can I be of assistance?"

"I just need you to help me get to the realm of Candy Land," Seychelles replied. "I heard rumours that the King knows all sorts of tricks to scare away the mimes. Oddly enough, a lot of them involve gingerbread."

England nodded in understanding. The King had picked up many gingerbread-related attacks whilst in Russia.

"Alright, let us be off," England said. He then gestured to his butler. "But first, help me move him to his bed."

To his surprise, Seychelles did something quite unexpected. She pulled a small box with a red button on top of it out of her pocket. After pushing the button, a strange blue box that said "Police Box" at the top appeared in the room. Out of it stepped a man with brown hair, mostly brown clothing with the exception of a white shirt, and a red bow tie.

"Good day, Doctor," Seychelles greeted. "I've found another victim for you."

"Oh, good," the strange man said. "Ever since the TARDIS started declared herself a god, it's been hard to find people willing to sacrifice their friends to her."

With that, he dragged England's butler into the blue box and disappeared.

"Well, that solved that problem," Seychelles said with a smile. "Now we can get going."

She then turned and skipped out the door, leaving England staring after her, mouth agape.

"What have I gotten myself into?" he moaned before following the stagehand out. He then had a sudden realization. "THAT WAS THE DOCTOR!

"Seychelles, perhaps we should have brought a weapon of some sort," England whispered to his companion as they skulked through the back alleyways of London. It was a good thing he took Japan up on those ninja lessons.

"Nah, we're almost there," Seychelles responded.

"Wait, if this was so easy, why did you need my help?" England asked.

"In case I needed a distraction, or a meat shield, or both," Seychelles replied offhandedly.

England gasped indignantly. Honestly, he didn't even get respect from his "friends", and now this? Hm, maybe it was time to call in one of the many favours France owed him. Seriously, how did the man get arrested during a game of Monopoly?

They finally made it to Candy Land after a few more minutes. Apparently, the mimes in the area were in a gang fight with the clowns from the traveling circus in town, so they got there without any incident. England thought about going straight back home, but decided to wait just in case that the Doctor was still there.

Of course, as soon as England and Seychelles entered a gingerbread building, The King stood in the middle of the room. He was smiling mischievously as he twirled a rose between his fingers.

"France!?" Seychelles and England exclaimed at the same time. France was about to say something, but he was assaulted by a swarm of angry ballerinas, which was a lot less sexy than it sounded. More painful than sexy, really. Fortunately, France seemed to be the sole source of their ire, so Seychelles quickly slipped off. England did stay and watch while they pummelled France, though.

"You pervert!"

"Let's cut his beard off!"

"Where's that child support I wanted? You haven't even met Joseph Jr.!"

"Exterminate!"

After they carried him off to some dark corner, England decided to go find Seychelles. By the looks of it, she was talking with some gingerbread people. But Seychelles was showing her new friends some some odd Swedish folksong and dance. He found himself singing it under his breath on his way home. "Something, something, something, Caramelldansen!"

He sighed in relief when he finally reached his house back in London. Despite his butler being gone, everything seemed to be in order. He decided to forgo lunch and just head straight back to bed. He'd had a long morning, after all.

To his despair, though, there was a familiar "face" in his bedroom. America was sitting on his bed, wearing his Santa suit. What's more, the scoundrel was obviously chewing on something.

"America, what are you eating?" he asked cautiously.

"Your socks," America replied easily, as if discussing the weather.

"What? Why?" England demanded, horrified.

"They're tasty," America replied simply before continuing his chewing.

England just sighed in defeat. He could never catch a break.