A/N: I know these ridiculous gaps in between updates must be frustrating and I apologize :/ I will never abandon this story though, so don't worry :)
"What do I do? The Dark Lord has never planned something of this magnitude before." It was late and the castle was asleep. Severus had immediately called on Dumbledore upon his return to Hogwarts. Dumbledore, though calm, listened to Snape with a growing sadness in his bright blue eyes. Severus sat in the chair opposite the desk with his head in his hands.
"I mean, I have… had to watch people die in front of me. But to actually be the one… I cannot. I will not." Severus's mind was numb with fear. Throughout his years of feigned service to the Dark Lord, he had been able to avoid personally causing significant harm to another person. He had to witness it, sometimes even facilitate it, but at the end of the day, it was never his wand that casted the spells of torture, injury, and death. Now however, for the first time, Voldemort had enlisted all of his Death Eaters for an all-out direct attack. If the Dark Lord suspected that Snape was attempting to avoid hurting people during the attack, he would undoubtedly question Snape's loyalty, yet Severus knew that he would never be able to fatally harm anyone, for the people that were likely to be in Diagon alley on Friday were to be average shoppers. Many of whom Severus would probably know. Severus was brought out of his personal thoughts by Dumbledore's next words.
"There is a way, I think." Snape lifted his head, his attention now fully focused on the older wizard in front of him.
"If you were to attack but only use let's say, Stunning or Disarming spells, I think that you would effectively be able to fool Voldemort without causing anyone any serious damage. However, you would have to keep everything nonverbal and stay as far away from Him as possible during the attack, for Voldemort is extremely clever and would instantly be able to catch on if you allowed him to observe you closely enough." Severus mulled this over in his mind. Dumbledore did have a point. Here was a way to still appear legitimate to Voldemort while avoiding injuring anyone.
"That… that is ingenious, headmaster." Severus had only appreciated Dumbledore more once in his life and that was when Dumbledore first rescued him from the Dark Arts.
"Thank you, Severus. But as I said, it will still be incredibly risky and you will need to focus completely." A wave of pity for the wretched man sitting before him suddenly washed over Dumbledore. Despite his tough exterior, Severus was still very much human, and bore the full emotional weight of his situation.
"I need to go to sleep. But…" Dumbledore looked away respectfully as Snape voice cracked. Snape stopped at the door and turned back. Looking Dumbledore straight in the eyes, he finished his sentence.
"Thank you… thank you so much."
As Severus made his way back to his office a sudden desire for Angelina struck him. It was nothing sexual, he just needed her warmth and comfort, and there was no way he was going to be able to sleep alone tonight. Stopping in an alcove he brought out his wand and conjured a tiny yellow bird, identical to the one that she had first teased him with that faraway day in the Astronomy Tower. With a flick of his wand, he sent the little bird to her. Hoping fervently that she was still awake, he leaned against the cool stone and attempted to gather his thoughts. Everything seemed to be getting worse. The Dark Lord was getting more and more aggressive with every passing day and the feeling of impending dread that had begun to haunt him kept increasing every day. His thoughts were interrupted by the appearance of a transparent animal that bounded by him lightly. He loved Angelina's Patronus. It was a large female wolf with a beautiful gleaming silver coat that reminded him of Angelina's dark hair. He turned his head to follow its progress and watched as it continued down the corridor until it disappeared in a stretch of moonlight. Severus started in the opposite direction that he had originally been headed in, toward the Hospital Wing.
"Angelina?" Severus entered the dark room quietly. There was a small light at the corner of the room, past the silent rows of pale hospital beds.
"I'm in here, Sev." Angelina's soft voice called out to him. Despite his day, Severus felt his heart lift as he saw her. She was sitting in her bed with her hair piled on top of her head and her tiny glasses perched on the very tip of her nose. She noticed his look and chastised him indignantly.
"Don't make fun of me! I've just discovered a hidden cache of medical books in one of the storage closets and I can't stop reading. Did you know that bowtruckle venom can be used to treat severe cystic acne?"
"No, I didn't Ange." Apparently he didn't do a good enough job of hiding the fatigue in his voice because her eyebrows quickly furrowed in concern. She could tell that he was hurting.
"What's wrong?" A simple question, but one that couldn't be answered nearly as simply, and actually couldn't be answered at all. How he hated his deception, but how necessary he knew it was. Because keeping her safe in this relationship was his number one priority and keeping her completely ignorant was the only way he could do that.
"I'm just… I'm just tired, Angelina." His voice held all of the defeat that he had experienced that day. Unquestioningly, Angelina blew out the candle that she had been reading by and motioned for him to join her. Propping herself up, she took his head in her lap and ran her fingers through his hair, soothing him to sleep.