Please Be Careful With My Heart

Disclaimer: 'Charmed' is not mine. I just love it so much so I did this. So, please don't sue me.

WOW! I got more than 10 reviews, for the last chapter 20. Thank you to all the wonderful people who reviewed it. All of your reviews were overwhelming and uplifting. Thank you so so much! I hope I could give them justice (your reviews) with this chapter. (",)

Chapter 21

Moments

Piper was on her way to the hospital for her regular check-up. This time she was alone, much better. If there would be any bad news, she will carry the burden alone. And that was a good thing, her family has suffered enough hardships because of her predicament. They did not need another.

Her thoughts were interrupted by a figure coming towards her. A figure she missed and longed for. A figure she should avoid. And she would if just her body would cooperate. Though she stood in an open area with lots of space, she couldn't seem to move her feet, she felt like a trapped animal. She just took a deep breath and displayed a cold but casual stance. Hoping he wouldn't notice her nervousness.

"Piper." Leo whispered. He has been waiting for that moment, moment when he would be face to face with the only girl who had rocked his world. He had been practising what to say to her but now, he was just… speechless, tongue-tied. She looked so beautiful, much more beautiful than he ever imagined, if that was even possible. It was like- she became increasingly beautiful as time passed by. Or maybe it was just him, just him yearning for her and now that she finally stood before him, he felt like being struck by lightning, for the second time. The first time was when he first met her.

"Hey." Piper was out of words. What do you say to a guy you love after giving him the worst possible hurt anyone could ever receive? It was much easier if she cheated on him because she doesn't love him, but no, she gave him up to her sister, dared him to 'love' her sister instead of her, while loving him. Treating him like a toy that someone could pass on to the younger sibling after outgrowing it. 'Hey' seemed to be the safest word to say.

Leo hated that word. Piper seemed to be using it a lot lately, on him specifically, ever since this bump started to appear in their relationship. But it's different now, a lot different. Whatever stunt Piper decides to do, it wouldn't stop him. Nothing will stop him from shaking her until she talks to him as the real Piper he was used to and not some bimbette. He won't stop until she agrees to try again.

"Piper, can I talk to- " Leo started.

"No! I have an appointment today." She interrupted and started to walk away.

"Please. Piper. Please." Leo pleaded with desperation clear in his eyes. He didn't even notice that he had stopped her by grasping her hand. It just seemed natural. An instinct. He looked at her as if his life depended on it. In a way, it was true. He couldn't imagine life without her.

Piper saw the torture in him and it destroyed her. The least she could do was give him a chance to reason. It didn't mean she would agree with it. But she will listen. "Ok. Fine." she answered him. 'And now I have to reject him for the second time.' she thought as she pulled away her hand from him.

He was surprised and relieved at the same time. She agreed! She actually said yes to him! He was prepared to kneel in front of her- right there on the sidewalk- and beg her to talk to him and give him a chance. Now, he didn't have to do that. But he was disappointed when she pulled her hand away.

They walked quietly, it seemed they were headed to the park. The same park, where her first attack occurred with him present. And now that same bench. Fate was such a strange player between them. Very strange.

Seconds passed, they both took a deep breath at the same time. Stealing glances at each other.

"Leo-"

"Piper-"

Both started at the same time. It was funny. They caught each other's eyes. Then they shared a smile. Smile that felt like home for the both of them. A sweet nostalgia.

Then he caught her hand and enclosed it with his. "Piper?" He was staring at their joined hands. Then he looked at her eyes. "What happened to us?" he asked with regrets, regrets for the lost time they could have shared.

Piper's mind was telling her to pull away and run, not get familiarize again with this picture. Him holding her and looking at her this way. But her body, her heart seemed to combat with her mind. "I- I don't know…" she trailed off shaking her head and looking away from him.

But Leo's hand reached up cup her face lovingly and made her look at him. "I'm begging you to tell me the truth and nothing but. Did you ever… did you ever stopped loving me?" He asked with a sigh. Truth was, he was afraid of her answer.

Piper just stared at him.

"Because if you ask me, never." He said with conviction. "Never did it occur to me to stop loving you. I tried to love or at least find something that will trigger it towards your sister but in spite of that, I never- never stopped loving you." He was squeezing and rubbing her hand with both of his, as if he as drawing strength from it. He looked restless. "I couldn't- I just couldn't- Phoebe was nice but- I- "

"Shh…" Piper pressed her finger against his lips soothing him. To her, he looked like a kid who just witnessed a horrid crime and couldn't quite process it. She felt really sorry for him.

They stared at each other intimately, both reminiscing the times when they were still together.

Leo kissed her finger and pressed her hand to his chest. "Don't you want this anymore? Moments like this. Moments when everything seems to be so much easier. Don't you want me anymore?"

It was Piper's turn to get restless. She had to clear it with him once and for all, no more games and acts. It's now or never. Just the truth. They both deserved it, a closure. She pulled away from Leo and stood up with her back to him as she hugged herself. Leo expected her to run away. But then she turned around with fresh tears from her eyes. It stung him, stung him hard in the heart. They made him want to carry her and hide her away from every bad thing in the world. But he stopped himself and just sat still and watched her.

"Of course, I do! God knows I do! I want you! I want this. I want all of it. I want all of these feelings I have for you, feelings I never expected to have for anyone else." Then she stopped. With a small voice, she added. "But we can't. It won't work for either of us."

"What do you mean?" Leo couldn't understand it. 'Why is she being so difficult?' he thought.

"You don't really understand what you'd be getting into." Piper was shaking her head as she wiped her tears while fresh ones streamed down on her cheeks.

Leo's face was full of confusion. "Piper, I need to know why you've thrown up a wall between us."

"I'm sick, ok! I don't really know how long do I still have. I'm always on alert with my own body. I'm scared everyday. I'm scared of the time when the day would come and my heart would suddenly stop beating and everything it's supposed to do, and just… fail me. Fail my family. Fail you." Her right hand clutches her chest. "But I can feel it, it's getting close." Piper's voice came down to a whisper that Leo had to come closer to understand her. "My life is too uncertain to expect anyone else to share it. And that's the choice I have to make."

Leo stood before her, brushed her tears with his knuckle, pulled her closer and tucked her head under his chin. "We don't always make the right choices, Piper." he whispered and closed his eyes as a single tear escape. All the while brushing his fingers smoothly on Piper's silky hair. He missed that, and he was savouring the moment.

Piper rested her head on Leo's chest. In spite of everything that was happening between them, he always seemed to do the right thing to soothe her every nerve.

Then suddenly all the insecurities came back to her. It made her pull away and started fidgeting with the pattern on Leo's shirt. She whispered softly. "But I have nothing to offer you. I can't assure you of forever. If I choose to undergo that surgery, I could be bedridden for life or brain dead or mentally incapacitated." She was ranting and finally she looked up at him with new tears threatening to fall from her eyes. "You don't need that kind of anguish in your life, Leo. You're young, you can find someone else. You deserve someone better." She tried to pull away from his enveloped arms around her.

He held her tighter. He couldn't let her go. He just tilted her head up with a finger under her chin to look at him. "No. No one's better than you in my heart, Piper. We both know that. You could offer me every sister in the world, but it won't change anything. My feelings will always be the same." Then he sighed and cupped her cheeks with both hands. "You're right, I don't need that anguish in my life, but I need you. I need you, Piper." Tears were also starting to form in his eyes. "I want to be a part of your life. Whatever it is that you have to face, I wanna be there. Please don't push me away. Please." He closed his eyes and kissed her forehead, her temple, her cheek… and finally, her lips. They were both crying now.

They kissed as if it was their last. Kisses paired up with the tears from each of them. They were making up for the time they've lost when she was trying to be someone else and he was with someone else.

Then she pulled away and ended the kiss. "I need more time, Leo." she whispered. "Please."

Just when Leo thought he got her back, she was pulling away again. "But-"

"Please, Leo. Give me time." She was distancing herself from him, from everything that was familiar and homey. She needed to sort things out.

Leo sighed. At least she was giving him chance, and considering everything they have talked about. 'I could wait. Yeah. I'll do that. I can do that.' He tried to convince himself.

"Ok. I'll do that. But I won't give up on you. I am not gonna let you give up on anything either. Do you hear me?" Leo kissed her hands again and again.

"I'll call you, I promise." Piper whispered in his ear. Piper was reluctant to leave him. She didn't want to get out of Leo's embrace, she just wanted to stay there and be comforted by him. But no, she had to spoil the moment. She had to think all this through. She couldn't do that with Leo standing in front of her, clouding her judgement. She wouldn't have the strength to withstand him.

They kissed again, drawing strength from one another. He just had to get another before he watched her walk away.

Now that Piper was not in his arms anymore, it felt empty and cold.

"Please don't give up me. Don't give up on us." He whispered watching his life walk away from him, hoping it wasn't for good.

UUUUUU

A/N: I borrowed some of my favorite lines from a favorite pocketbook, "Courage, My Love" by Lynn Leslie. It's a really good story.

So…(chewing on my bottom lip) how did it go?