I is for Insane

It was only after I met Light that I learned that L had attended college with him, getting in quite easily and excelling at it. It didn't surprise me. L was a genius. He'd gotten close to Light, and although he had him under suspicion he seemed to have some sort of fondness for him. I have to admit, I admired Light's mind as well, but I got the feeling he wasn't letting on everything he knew. We had been working with Light with only a few weeks when a second Kira came into play.

"Isn't it weird, staying with Ryusaki?" Matsuda asked, sitting down next to me while L and Light spoke.

"Not really, he's pretty much the same as he is right now." I replied.

Matsuda blinked, glancing at L, then back to me.

"Aren't you worried he placed cameras in your room, or wiretaps, or something like that?" His wide eyes had the concern written all over him.

"No, you moron." I scoffed. "Even if he did it would only be to protect himself, or for the investigation. I'd do the same thing."

"That's kind of an invasion of personal space, like when Ryusaki put the cameras in the chiefs place."

"When it comes to catching a killer and protecting yourself, you do whatever you can, Matsu." I replied harshly.

"I guess that's true… But I still wouldn't be okay with it."

I started over to the table, sitting on the couch furthest away from everyone else.

"Agent Charrett," Chief Yagami called. "Would you mind grabbing us some coffee? It seems we're out."

I wrinkled my nose. "Do I look like a damn coffee running secretary to you, chief?"

I shot a glare at Aizawa. "Open your mouth, afro, I dare you."

Mogi just chuckled.

"That's no way to talk to the chief!" Matsuda exclaimed, practically jumping out of his seat.

"Oh don't get your panties in a twist."

"No," the Chief interrupted. "She's right. Agent Charrett is one of our best detectives. I shouldn't be treating her as an assistant."

Damn straight.

"That's what I'm here for, sir." Watari interludes. "I'll be right back with a fresh pot." he said as he turned away and entered the kitchen.

"I feel bad that Watari is doing everything for us," Mogi sighed.

"Yeah, he's always been so respectful." Matsuda agreed while Aizawa looked at me.

"Fuck off, Aizawa."

"Charrett, I expect more professionalism from you." The chief sighed. We've had this conversation one too many times.

"Do you really?" Aizawa retorted. "Ms. 'I play russian roulette with a suspect's kneecap in interrogation' is expected of professionalism? Gimme a break."

"That was one time!" I groaned. "And he sang for me! What was your tactic? Intimidating him with your afro?"

"Again with the afro?" Aizawa started to raise his voice.

"Agents, please." Chief cut in. "Ryusaki and Light are trying to work."

We all paused, Aizawa and I practically ramming heads, Matsuda uncomfortable in the middle from it all and Mogi sitting back enjoying the show. It was like we'd never left the department. Light and Ryusaki had been watching us, Light looking bored and unimpressed and L with the same blank look on his face.

"That's quite alright, Mr. Yagami. Light and I have come to a conclusion." L said, his voice sounding so quiet after the shouting Aizawa was doing.

"What kind of conclusion?" Mastuda asked.

Ryusaki turned to the monitor of the paused tape that had been taken from the network.

"We are going to reply to this second Kira, as the first Kira. Light will be writing the script and posing as the original Kira. Then, we wait for the reply of the second Kira."

It was a good plan, and it didn't take them long to come up with a good response that sounded just like something the original Kira would no doubt say. After replying to the message with another aired to the public written by Light, who posed as Kira(unsettlingly well, might I add), most everyone went home around the same time as usual.

"Remember, check for cameras!" Matsu muttered as he walked past me out the door.

"Go home, you idiot."

It was just L, Watari and I.

Most of the time, we both kept to ourselves, looking over files, evidence,and surveillance. I found it entertaining, watching L eat his sweets constantly, and while he lost himself in thought he'd often stack things and watch them pile up.

"You're staring at me."

L's voice caught me off guard.

"What? Oh - sorry - I didn't realize I was."

"Is there something you need? Perhaps something you'd like to say?" He asked.

Good God, put me on the spot like that. "No… I guess I just zoned out for a moment there."

"I see. You must be tired. You are welcome to go to bed. I can look over the rest."

I scoffed.

"If anything, you should be the one going to bed."

"I don't understand." L retreated his head from the screen and focused fully on me.

"I'm saying you don't get any sleep. I don't think I've ever seen you sleep."

I'd been in the same hotel room with him for weeks, and I'd always seen him constantly working the case. It was like he wasn't human. I didn't understand how he could stay up countless hours without a wink of sleep for days on end and function as well as he does.

"I can stay awake for approximately seventy-two hours. But sleeping for as long as most do, I find it a waste of time. Only a few hours are required for a person to function properly."

What the hell was I supposed to say to that?

"I probably can too." I replied. Honestly, I'm not sure why I said that. I guess it was just to reply - or to be stubborn.

"It sounds as if you are challenging yourself to do the same?"

I'm not sure, but it almost sounded like L was amused with me.

"I guess. I mean, hell, if you can, so can I."

"It's your choice." he said. "Would you like some tea?" he asked, climbing out of his chair and standing. I smirked a little. I liked it when he stood. I don't know why, but the way he carried himself was so foreign and odd, it struck interesting. His hunched over posture, glassy grey eyes and messy hair with his slender figure looming there. I wanted to put my hands on him. I replayed the brief hug. It just felt good having him close to me. How odd that was. I don't like people close to me and in my personal bubble.

"Ms. Ariorian?"

Shit. I brought my gaze back up to him. "What? Oh - sorry. Yes please, I'll have some."

L left without responding and returned with two cups of tea, setting one down in front of me.

"Thank you."

There was a short pause while L sat back down in his crouch, and sipped from the cup, while his ghostly eyes lingered at the overly sweetened beverage.

"Spade," I said.

"Hm?" He lifted his head to me once again.

"Please, call me Spade."

"If that is what you wish. Is there any particular reason?"

"I guess… it's just that it's kind of nice having someone I trust know my name. When you said it when we were going to lunch that day after my place burnt down, I kind of liked it."

He just looked at me, and cocked his head to the side slightly.

"What is it?" I asked.

It was like he was observing me, he almost seemed… puzzled?

"I find you intriguing, Ms. Ariorian. At times you are guarded and very aggressive, mostly towards Aizawa and Mastuda I notice; but then you are a calming presence, and very trusting. You are difficult to decipher."

To him? Difficult to decipher? I'd always seen myself as so transparent.

"So why is it that you shift between these two personas?"

"I suppose it's because I trust you."

Silence.

"I see."

Silence.

"I feel the need to tell you something about myself." L said.

I looked up from my cup.

"Like what?"

"I'm not sure."

"Where did you grow up?"

"I spent five years in Britain. I was an orphan, Watari is my handler."

I wasn't expecting that response. The word 'handler' made his relationship with Watari significantly less personal than it really was.

"Is everything alright, Spade?"

His concern was almost showing. I nodded.

How was I supposed to reply to that? My childhood wasn't great, but I at least had parents around. I guess he had Watari, but…

"I guess you can say I trust you as well," he spoke again, interrupting my thoughts. "I apologize if I've caused you any discomfort."

"No, it's not that. I just didn't expect that to be your background."

I took an awkward sip of tea while a moment of silence fell between us once more.

"Tell me, why did you choose this occupation?"

I looked up from the cup. I shot him a questioning look, but he didn't seem to pick up on the signal, so I voiced my thought.

"What do you mean?"

"Why did you choose to be a detective? You're an attractive young woman, and intelligent. I would assume you would be able to do much more with your life than catching serial killers and criminals burning your place of residence down."

I smiled, almost a little shyly, my gaze falling back to the cup in my hand as I fiddled with it.

"I suppose I have a sick sense of entertainment." I mumbled. When I lifted my eyes to his, I found him smiling at me. That caught me off guard, and I felt my stomach flutter and twist in nervousness. Why the hell…?

Clearing my throat, I set the tea down. "I should stop distracting us."

"That's alright," L replied. "I enjoy speaking to you."

I smiled a little again.

"I do think I'm going to head to bed though, I'll speak to you in the morning." Standing up, I headed to the bedroom.

"Goodnight, Spade." L called after me, not turning his head from the computer. I didn't reply.

I closed the door behind me and sighed softly. It was only now that I realized how drained I become at the end of the day, when my mind has finally broken away from the case and focused on simple, everyday needs - like sleep. I undressed and changed into pajamas that had been left on my dresser along with the other clothes Watari had so kindly bought. A two-piece, dark navy blue silk set. It buttoned up to almost the collar, with a thin, off-white trim to accent, and good God, was it comfortable.

Climbing under the covers, I couldn't help but let my mind race again. We'd be moving the HQ to a building L had specially built for this investigation that had everything we'd need and then some. He'd mentioned before everyone left that if we wanted to continue with the investigation, we'd have to leave the department. Permanently. It wasn't a big deal for me, but the others, they had relationships and bonds in the department. I was unsure of how many of the few detectives would actually commit to this case. It was an important case, but dedication only goes so far when it has risks in any personal aspect.