So my son is getting 2 awards. The first is the Presidential award for maintaining a 3.5 GPA throughout his middle school years and the other is the Eagle Academic Award (We are the Independence Eagles) for maintaining a 3.8 GPA throughout.

Thank you to all of you who reviewed the last chapter, and you know who you are because you always review. I love you guys and I'll miss hearing from you.

BITTERSWEET MOMENT

WHEN I WOKE I WAS IN A HOSPITAL ROOM. There was a nurse at my side. In a chair on the other side of the room reading was Fords Deep Water.

"Healer, she's waking up."

Fords Deep Water crossed the room quickly. "I can take it from here."

The nurse stepped away but didn't leave the room.

"Fords Deep Water. What are you doing here?"

"You know me but I'm sorry to say I don't know you. I need you to be silent so I can listen to your heart and lungs." He leaned forward to put the stethoscope on my back. He took the opportunity to whisper in my ear. "We never met at the restaurant. Pretend you are going to throw up."

I did as he asked. "I'm going to be sick," I muttered and I climbed out of the bed.

"Let me get you to the bathroom. Nurse, get the ultra sound equipment ready please."

The nurse left the room to do as he asked. Once inside the bathroom Fords Deep Water spoke quickly.

"Wanderer, I want to help you and your companions. You need to trust me. Can you do that?"

I nodded.

"The restaurant never happened. I'm meeting you for the first time. Understand?"

I nodded.

"There now, you feel better right? Go ahead and wash up. I'll be right outside."

I went to the bathroom and washed up before returning to the bed.

"You gave us all quite a scare. Do you know what happened to you?"

"I fainted?"

"No. You disconnected."

"What?" I was confused by this term.

"Some souls shred their brains when threatened with overwhelming odds. It's a defense mechanism. You've heard of it?"

"Yes."

"You, on the other hand, merely disconnected all of your connections to the brain. In essence, you removed yourself from the host. It is rare. Few souls can do it without shredding the brain. If I hadn't gotten you out you would have eventually died."

"How long was I out for?"

"By the time I got here, you had been down for nearly an hour. The heat of the body is what kept you alive. It's sort of like having a heart attack. I had to remove you from the host and use a massage technique to bring you back so you would respond when placed back in the body. You are lucky I was in town. Not many healers know the technique."

I suddenly remembered why it all happened in the first place. I remembered seeing Ian. I started to shake. "They implanted him! Colonel Jeffries promised me they wouldn't!" I began to cry.

Fords Deep Water put his arms around me and spoke softly. "I know it's difficult for you right now, but it's not a death sentence." He whispered, "Things can be undone."

"Will you help me?"

"I'll do what I can. You need to face him and let them see his love for you. It's very important."

The nurse returned with the sonogram machine. Fords Deep Water asked me to pull up the hospital gown I was wearing to reveal my abdomen. He covered my lower half with a blanket out of respect and went to work. I could hear the heartbeat of the baby. It was very fast. He said it was normal for the heartbeat to be faster than my own. I could see the baby on the screen. He said it was still too early to be sure if it was a boy or a girl. Satisfied with the outcome of the sonogram, he instructed the nurse to pack up the equipment. He said he would return in a few minutes to speak with me and that I should go wash the gel off my belly and change back into my clothes.

When he returned the nurse was with him. "I want to make it very clear to you that your body and your baby can't take the shock of being opened up every twenty four hours to heal you. If it happens again I could lose one or both of you. I have informed the President of this and he wants me to stay close to you at all times. You need to remain calm. If you do not want to see your husband then let them know before they bring him in. Do you understand?"

"Yes." I wanted to see Ian desperately. I hoped that Ian would be strong enough to hold his ground inside his own head. I needed him to know that I wasn't giving up especially now that I had someone like Fords Deep Water on my side.

Fords Deep Water took me by the arm and we were escorted by guard to the room I had been in previously. We sat and waited. The President and the General entered a few minutes later.

"Young lady, you gave us quite a fright. Fords Deep Water said you easily could have died. Why would you want to do that?"

I looked at Fords Deep Water. He nodded his head at me to answer the question. I was honest.

"Ian is my life. I should have been dead a long time ago. He is the reason I am here. Without him in human form, I have no reason to live."

"You do remember that he has been implanted."

"With a Seeker, I wager."

"Yes, we needed a strong soul to get possible information that he may be hiding."

"He loves me and I hope he is strong enough to show you that."

"So, you can withstand seeing him?"

"I hope so," I whispered.

I stood up and waited for Ian to enter the room. He came in and looked very frightened. I approached him slowly. I stared at his eyes. I wanted to see what he was thinking. I stopped in front of him.

"Do you know who I am?" It was a stupid question but I asked it so I could get a response more than anything.

"Yes."

I reached up towards his cheek and he stepped back. "Please," I asked.

I stepped forward again and touched his cheek. "Ian, I know you are in there." He reached up and pulled my hand from his cheek. He held them both in his so I couldn't touch him anymore. He obviously felt uncomfortable.

"I don't want you to give up. Remember when I came to you at the baseball field? When I told you to fight for me? I want you to fight harder than you ever have. We can still be together. I have faith." Ian squeezed my hands.

Suddenly he dropped my hands and backed up quickly and had a look of horror on his face.

The General questioned him. "What's wrong Seeker Rising Smoke?"

He just stood there.

I suddenly understood. "You squeezed my hands."

He didn't move and he didn't speak.

"You squeezed my hands," I repeated.

"That wasn't me."

I pulled my shaking hands to my face. "Ian! I love you."

Rising Smoke had a glazed look on his face. I knew that look. I had that same look when I was arguing with Melanie in my head.

"He's arguing with you, isn't he?"

"How did you know?"

"What is he saying?"

Rising Smoke swallowed. He was definitely freaked out. "He said I don't belong in his head. He says he'll haunt me forever."

The General interrupted. "What about his memories. What have you seen?"

Rising Smoke just shook his head. "Her." He pointed to me. "She's all I see. There's no one else."

"What do you mean?" The President asked.

"I see her in her wedding dress coming down the aisle. I see her saying 'I do.' I see her covered with mud throwing mud at me. I see her making an angel in the snow. I see her dancing. I see moments I'm not at liberty to speak about."

I started to cry. I fell to my knees and sobbed. Fords Deep Water jumped to his feet and ran to me. "Are you okay?"

I nodded my head. I couldn't speak.

Then I heard the General speak. "Are you crying?"

He wasn't speaking to me. I looked at Rising Smoke and tears were sliding down his cheeks.

"I can't control him," he croaked.

"Do you want to skip?"

"I've never skipped before but…"

"Corporal, will you please take Rising Smoke to his room."

"No. I don't want him to leave. Please let him stay. I need him when Nate comes."

"Very well."

A minute later they brought Nate in. I cringed when I saw him.

I walked up to him. I was angry now that my happy optimistic Nate was gone. I scowled at him. "What is your name?"

"Travels the Frozen Tundra."

"That's a stupid name." I turned to the General. "Why is it all your military types come from the Mists planet or the Fire planet? Maybe because they produce souls that are more volatile?" I was spitting venom now.

"Mrs. O'Shea, we don't need to insult his name."

I walked over to Ian and spoke to him directly. "Ian, forgive me but I have to do this to save Nate."

I walked up to Travels the Frozen Tundra and I planted one right on the lips before he could react. He pulled back with a smile on his face. Then just as quickly that smile turned to surprise.

I got in his face. "Go ahead, Nate. Keep yelling at him. You are pissing him off," I taunted him.

"Stop telling him what to do!" he snapped back at me.

"Ha! He's in there. I knew it!"

The General spoke. "Mrs. O'Shea! Will you please control yourself?"

At that moment, Colonel Jeffries entered the room with Sergeant Woodfern in tow. As soon as he came through the door I verbally attacked him.

"Colonel Jeffries, you went back on your promise! How could you?"

"Hold on Missy. What are you talking about?"

"They implanted them both!"

He looked over at both Ian and Nate. "I'm sorry. My orders were to the contrary."

The President spoke. "Mrs. O'Shea! If you cannot control yourself you will be removed!"

Fords Deep Water stood up and tried to get me to sit down.

Rising Smoke spoke. "Wanderer." The fact that it was Ian's voice was enough to freeze me in my tracks. "Ian wants you to relax. He doesn't want another medical issue. He says…I love you."

I went quietly with Fords Deep Water and sat next to him in the chair.

President Halsden took a deep breath. "Okay. Now that things are in order, I'll ask the questions if you don't mind."

I nodded my head.

Satisfied with my response, the President turned his attention to Nate. "Travels the Frozen Tundra, tell me what memories you have seen from the mind of Nathan Downey."

"He's not letting me see anything really, except Wanderer, although that's not what he calls her."

"What does he call her?"

"He generally refers to her as 'Beautiful'. I see them playing pool. He likes to watch her. I see him dancing with her at her wedding. He's sad. I see him kissing her. I see him putting on her shoes. He is upset. I just see her. It's like a never ending slide show."

"Mrs. O'Shea. What do you do to these men?" the President asked.

"That's easy. I love them."

"But you are married."

"My heart is big enough for both men. I love Ian as my husband and my lover. I love Nate as my closest friend."

"But you've kissed him."

"Yes, I'm only human," I said boldly.

"Colonel, you spent some time with her. Give me your take on this."

"This is my personal opinion. I have never in my lives ever seen two entities that belong together like Ian and Wanderer. They each have control over the other. At our meeting in the field, I saw him lose his temper. I thought for sure I would have to call the guards to physically suppress him but I watched her control him with one kiss. Just a few minutes ago you witnessed him control her with three words…'I love you'. It's just crazy. I personally would love to see how this relationship between human and soul plays out."

"Thank you for your opinion. Would you stay with us and discuss this further?"

"That's why I'm here. I'm just sorry I'm so late. I heard that Mrs. O'Shea had a health scare." He turned to me. "I hope you're all right."

"The jury is still out on that one."

"Fords Deep Water, will you escort Mrs. O'Shea to her room at the compound?"

"Of course, Mr. President."

In the car I had the opportunity to speak with Fords Deep Water. I still wanted to be very careful in case the car was bugged.

"What do you think they'll do?"

"Well, Mrs. O'Shea." He too was trying to keep the conversation at a professional level. "I'm not a military man but if I were them I would probably heed the Colonel's opinions. He seems to be on your side. Whatever decision they make you should know by morning."

"What about Nate?"

"Not sure about him. He has strong feelings for you as well. That might be a good thing or it might be a bad thing."

"Why would it be a bad thing?"

"They may feel that he throws a wrench into the relationship between you and Ian. If they decide to remove the soul from Ian they will want to be sure that you can control him. Jealousy can be an ugly thing."

"But Ian didn't show his jealousy."

"Not today, but you can be sure they will weigh that option."

Once Fords Deep Water had escorted me safely to my room, he encouraged me to take a nap. I was pretty tired so I heeded his plea. I hung up my dress in the bathroom and changed into my shirt for my nap.

I don't know how long I slept but when I woke I changed back into my dress. It wasn't long before there was a knock on the door. It was the Captain.

"The President has invited you for dinner in his private dining room. I have come to take you there."

Here we go again. I was starving but I was afraid that seeing Rising Smoke in my Ian's body would take away my appetite. When I arrived at the dining room, most of the diners were already seated. At the head of the table was President Halsden flanked by General Blue Flame and Colonel Jeffries. Sergeant Woodfern was seated next to the Colonel. He bade me to come and sit next to him. There were still three empty chairs.

"The others are running a little late. Would you care for an appetizer?" the General asked.

Why would Ian and Nate be running late? Did the Seekers inside their bodies make a breakthrough and discover the people in the caverns? I was uneasy about his statement. I turned my attention to the food. There were several appetizers on the table to choose from. The Sergeant picked up my plate.

"Mrs. O'Shea, what would you like?"

"Um, the bacon wrapped scallops and the stuffed mushrooms please."

He placed several of each on the plate. A waiter came in and immediately approached me. "May I get you something to drink?"

"Unsweet tea with lemon will be fine. Thank you."

I ate my appetizers faster than I should have simply because I was so hungry. I drank my tea quickly too. The waiter brought out a second glass and I was noshing on a spinach dip with fresh baked bread when the door opened and in walked Ian. My stomach sank until I looked at his eyes. Rising Smoke was gone. It was Ian. I flew from my chair and literally jumped into his arms. He caught me in mid air and pulled me to him. I wrapped my arms around his neck.

"I can't believe it's you!" I buried my face in his neck. He twirled me around the room as he cradled the back of my head in his hand.

"I love you, Babydoll." He put me down and leaned in to kiss me. I pulled him to me with all my might. When our lips touched, it was like static electricity. It was a hungry kiss. We couldn't get enough of each other.

Finally, Colonel Jeffries spoke. "Ian, she's already pregnant."

We both smiled and began to laugh which broke the kiss. I brushed my hand across his lips to make sure I hadn't left any wetness behind. I took him by the hand and led him to the table. "Thank you for giving me the love of my life back."

Ian made sure I was seated and then he sat next to me but he didn't face the table. He sat sideways in his chair and he stared at me. He stroked my hair as if no one else was there.

The President addressed him. "Mr. O'Shea."

Ian continued to stroke my hair and stare at my face. It was almost creepy. It was like he was trying to memorize every single line on my face.

The President spoke louder. "Mr. O'Shea! Would you like an appetizer?"

Ian finally spoke although he never took his eyes off of me. "Would you give me one more night with her?"

"What are you talking about?" The President was clearly confused by his statement.

He finally looked directly at President Halsden. "If this is my last meal and you intend to dispose of me then please, I beg you; give me one more night with my wife."

Travels the Frozen Tundra appeared in the doorway. "Sorry I'm late. I had a session with a comforter."

The President remained focused on Ian. "Mr. O'Shea, we have no intention on disposing of you."

"Why should I believe you?"

"Ian!" I squeaked.

"Because I'm the President of the United States of America. That's why!" He was clearly aggravated

Ian looked over at Travels the Frozen Tundra. "Then why didn't you take him out of Nate's body?"

"We have our reasons which we will discuss tomorrow at great length."

"I am a 'rogue'. Under your terms, if a rogue cannot support a soul, then it must be disposed of."

The President took a deep breath. "True. But that was before we had a reservation to send them to." He forced a smile.

Click! I couldn't believe what I was hearing. "You're letting us live. You're letting us all live!" I crooned.

"Yes, this is a celebration dinner."

I was ecstatic. I threw my arms around Ian. "We did it!" Then I looked across the table and I saw Travels the Frozen Tundra smiling too. My elation turned to fear. "What about Nate?"

"This will be discussed tomorrow," the General declared.

I wasn't going to give it up. "What about Nate?"

Travels the Frozen Tundra spoke. "Nate has agreed to give himself up for the good of the cause."

My eyes filled with tears. "No!" I collapsed into Ian's arms and sobbed uncontrollably.

"I'm sorry Wanderer. I know you love him. He loves you too that's why he's doing this." Ian tried to console me to no avail. I couldn't speak. Every time I tried my stomach would heave and my voice would squeak.

"I love you Nate. I can't lose you." It was all I could manage to squeak out before a new wave of tears overwhelmed me. This hurt almost as much as losing Ian. It was a bittersweet moment. Everyone watched me for a solid five minutes before the President finally asked Ian to take me back to the room. Ian scooped me off of the chair just as Fords Deep Water entered the room.

"Is she all right?" He rushed over concerned for my welfare.

"No, she's very upset. Is there anything you can give her to calm her down? I mean that won't hurt the baby?"

"No. I'm sorry there isn't."

Ian didn't speak another word. He carried me out to the waiting limousine and we were taken back to my room with the bed and the table with the lamp. He laid me in the bed. He stripped down to his boxers and climbed in beside me. He held me until eventually I drifted off to sleep, my body still jumping like a baby who has cried itself to sleep. A few times my jumping body woke me up and I would start to cry again. I don't know how long this went on.

When I woke I didn't know what time it was. Ian was asleep next to me which gave me some comfort. At least I still had him. It must have been difficult for him to see me fall apart because of Nate. I leaned over and put my head and hand on his chest. He jumped and woke up.

He curled his arm around me. "Are you all right?"

"Yes and no. I still have you. That's most important."

"Babydoll, I'm here for you."

"I know." I kissed his beautiful chest.

"Would you like to take a shower? ...with me?" he said sweetly.

"Yeah."

He led me to the bathroom. I brushed my teeth as he started the shower. He turned and helped me take my clothes off. "Get in. I'll be right there."

He brushed his teeth and entered the shower. We soaped each other up and as we slowly caressed each other's body, the natural excitement took over. Ian kissed me and our soapy bodies slid over each other. I wanted him right then and there but this shower wasn't exactly designed with sexual activity in mind. We rinsed and draped our bodies in a towel and went back to the bed.

"Ian, they have cameras. They are watching us."

"Well, then I guess we should give them something worth watching."

"Ian!" He smiled and pulled the covers over our heads. It felt like I was having sex with my boyfriend in my parents' bed. It felt sneaky. It felt good. Somewhere in the middle of our love making there was a knock on the door. We froze but we didn't answer. There was another knock.

Ian answered. "Not a good time. Come back later. Much later."

There wasn't another knock so we picked up where we left off. When he finished he kept on kissing me and before I knew it he was on me again. Ian was like a kid in a candy store and I was happy to be the candy. After the second time Ian decided he should inform the guard that we were available.

Ten minutes later just as we were getting frisky yet again there was another knock on the door. Ian stopped kissing me and yelled 'Come in!'

The Captain entered the room. I guess he expected us to be fully clothed rather than lying under the covers naked and making out. He averted his eyes before he spoke. "They are waiting on you. If you could please get dressed, I will take you there."

"Is he always like this?" Ian asked me.

"Like what?"

"So formal?"

"Yes, he is."

The Captain left the room. Ian reached to the floor for his towel and wrapped it around himself. He walked to my side of the bed and handed me my towel. I pulled it under the blanket and wrapped it around myself before getting up. We dressed quickly. I opted for no makeup simply because I knew the sight of Travels the Frozen Tundra would definitely start me crying again. Sex with Ian was a great diversion but it was only a temporary fix.

When we got to our destination, only the General and the Colonel were present.

"Good morning or should I say afternoon, Mr. and Mrs. O'Shea. I trust you slept well." Ian and I gave each other that knowing look and smiled.

Ian answered. "Yes, Wanderer needed her rest."

General Blue Flame looked skeptical. "Yes. Well, I have someone here who wants to see you."

The General buzzed his box and spoke into it. "Send him in please."

I was scared to death. I had no idea who could be coming through that door. Then I saw him.

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