Note: I know it is odd that Arthur and Molly would have no knowledge of what was going on at the school with the petrifications, and the removal of Hagrid and Dumbledore from the school, but I need it that way to make my story work so just think of this as an alternate universe.

Operation: Dunderheads Vacate

009 sat at his desk reviewing his plans for Operation: Dunderheads Vacate. The first part contained the goal: a sketch of the front of the castle with Minerva ushering the dunderheads to the carriages while Flitwick waved goodbye and he, Snape, cheerfully hammered a sign into the ground that read, "School Closed. No students allowed." Snape glanced over. A corner of said sign stuck out behind a bookshelf. Like before, Snape grimaced at the site of all the red heads in the picture. They were the key to his plan.

Snape flipped to the next drawing. It included just one red head dunderhead stuttering to two red hair parents that didn't seem very pleased with him. There was also a series of fireplaces with heads in them. Next to a door there was a tumbling pile of trunks, animal cages and teenage odds and ends.

At 6:59 a knock came at the door. 009 laid the plans down on his desk knowing that to others it would look like nothing other than a list of potions. "Enter."

Ron entered. "Sir, would you like me to clean cauldrons? Peel slugs? De-leg scorpions?" Ron was not looking forward to seeing his parents and hoped that Snape would choose one of these other options. Ron's parents were kind, loving people, but that doesn't mean they aren't strict when it came to one of their brood risking their life or the life of a sibling. Case in point: Fred and George convincing him to make an un-breakable vow.

This past summer Ron had come home and regaled his parents with how he had earned his house 50 points in one go. "For playing chess?" his father had asked. His parents had been less than impressed when they heard the whole tale of his adventure in the bowels of the castle. From their point of view eleven and twelve year olds should not be risking their lives. Oh, they were plenty peeved off at Dumbledore and his Mum had sent a howler to prove it. How dare the headmaster set a dangerous trap inside a school? But they had plenty of frustration left over for him. The ensuing lecture and punishment for risking his life had not been pleasant.

"You'll be doing none of those Mr. Weasley. Your parents are expecting us. Well, me in any case. I have scheduled a meeting with them regarding the behavior of one of their sons. They probably assume I'm bringing one of the twins."

Ron's stomach rolled.

"Through the floo Mr. Weasley."

Ron took a handful of floo powder, stated, "The Burrow," and stepped into the flames. Moments later he stepped out of the fireplace in the Burrow's kitchen. A few seconds later Snape followed.

"Ron?"

"Hi, Mum."

"Mrs. Weasley, Mr. Weasley."

Arthur nodded, "Professor Snape."

"I arranged this meeting because your son got himself into a bit of a fix earlier in the week."

"What kind of fix?" queried Molly.

"I'll leave that for him to explain."

All eyes turned to Ron. "Um, well. I was attacked by some large spiders a few days ago. Would have given me nightmares, but Professor Snape gave me some dreamless sleep potion." Snape rose an eyebrow at the lack of details and his name being brought up in the explanation.

Molly automatically went into protective mother mode. Running over to Ron, she grasped him in a tight hug. "Oh, Ron. That's awful. Are you alright, dear?"

"I'm fine, Mum."

"Mr. Weasley, aren't you leaving a few things out, like where the spiders were and exactly how large they were?" Molly glared at Severus. Why would a professor insist on Ron reliving the memory of how large the spiders were?

"Ron?" Arthur gave his son a questioning look.

"Where?" Ron squeaked, "The ah, Forbidden Forest. They..they," Ron gulped, "They were acromantulas, about ten feet across and eight feet tall."

Molly had a hand to her throat and she was gasping for air as she looked at her son with huge eyes. "Acromantula?!" She screeched.

In a darker tone his father said, "The Forbidden Forest? What were you doing in the Forbidden Forest?"

"Harry and I were trying to find out information about the monster that has been turning people to stone."

"Monster? People turning to stone?" Molly's eyes flew to Snape. "What is he talking about?"

"Didn't you know? I was sure one of your brood would have told you. The Chamber of Secrets has been opened. Slytherin's monster has been attacking students. Three have been petrified so far. Mr. Weasley, what was it you discovered in the acromantula den?"

Ron stuttered like Quirrell, "Th... That someone had died th...the last time the Chamber was opened."

"Died!" Molly grasped her chest and stumbled backward into one of the wood chairs surrounding the table.

As Molly worked on her worry Arthur interrogated his son. "Why did you go into the forest Ronald?"

Ron quaked. His dad had switched to using Ronald instead of Ron. Not a good sign. "We ah, Hagrid told us to follow the spiders and the spiders were going into the woods."

"Why didn't Hagrid follow the spiders?"

"They took him to Azkaban. Mr. Malfoy and Minister Fudge thought he might have something to do with the Chamber being opened. They sacked Professor Dumbledore too for letting it all happen."

"Graceous, me!" Molly's hands fluttered at her chest.

Though Molly looked like she wanted more details about Hagrid and Dumbledore, Arthur remained fixated on Ron's misbehavior. "Who did you seek help from before going into the forest?"

Ron closed his eyes. He'd been dreading this question. "No one." Ron responded.

Arthur glowered, "What research did you do into the dangers of the Forbidden Forest and how to defend yourself before you entered it?"

"None, sir." Ron fidgeted, looking at his feet.

"I think you and I need to have a talk." Arthur rose from his chair and led his son from the room.

"Stone, Severus? The monster is turning students to stone and the school is still open?"

Snape would have preferred she called him Professor or Professor Snape, but the frequent need to tattle on her brats had led Snape to become far too familiar with the quaint cottage and the matriarch of said abode. "Once the mandrakes have matured I will make a potion that will un-petrify everyone."

"But you said someone had died the last time the Chamber was opened. Shouldn't that have been enough to close the school?"

Snape shrugged. "I do not control such things. Perhaps if more parents knew, but teens rather protect their free time with friends than risk informing their parents and being sent home."

Molly's eyes flared. "Leave it to me Severus. Just send my children home and I'll see to the rest. If you'll excuse me, I have some floo calls to make."

Snape smirked as he exited the fireplace into his office. Operation: Dunderheads Vacate was underway and with so little effort from himself. The Weasley's may not have political pull, but their sheer numbers could be more powerful than a dragon in heat. Arthur and Molly both had numerous siblings and cousins and they all bred like rabbits trying to re-populate the Earth. The floos would burn hot tonight as information spread. With any luck he'd be hammering his sign into the ground before classes started Monday morning.