Staff Meeting

An emergency staff meeting had been called for Sunday evening. "Per bylaw 398.X-073 the school will be closing," stated Professor McGonagall as she resided over the meeting. "Arrangements have been made for the Hogwarts Express to pick up the remaining students tomorrow at 10:00 AM. I have a list of the parents who have not yet been informed. Each of you have been assigned a set of guardians to get in contact with."

The ponce's smile was way too pleased. He must have Potter on his list. Some of the younger staff seemed just as infatuated with the DADA instructor as many of the students. As Lockhart preened over the attention from one of them Snape switched list. 009 needed to make a trip to Privet Drive.

Operation: Dunderheads Vacate

"Jordan! Don't you dare leave that spider to wander around."

"Ms. Bell, is it your intention to leave your school books on the ground?" As predicted, McGonagall was trailing after students ensuring they didn't leave their possessions behind.

"Goodbye, see you in a few weeks!" Flitwick cheerfully waved goodbye from the steps of the school.

Snape received a few odd looks, he didn't realize he had been humming "Tomorrow" from Annie as he hammered in the sign he had made. One student froze and stared. This got Snape's attention. "Breath one word of this and you'll be skinning flubberworms from the time you return until Christmas." The student nodded then turned and dashed for the nearest carriage.

Operation: Mr. Fuss

Mission: Privet Drive

Snape apparated to a side street near Grunnings Drills. Like many Londoners Snape wore all black: turtleneck, slacks, Dockers. His hair was tide back at the base of his neck. 009 ran a quick errand, then Snape entered Grunnings Drills.

The secretary greeted him then asked, "How can I help you?"

"I need to speak with Vernon Dursley."

"Do you have an appointment?"

Obi-Wan made a slight hand gesture. "I don't need an appointment."

"You don't need an appointment."

Another hand gesture, "Right this way."

"Right this way, sir."

One of Agent 009's most helpful spy techniques was the wandless Jedi mind tricks. It worked on so many mindless idiots. Hhhm, maybe he could use it on Longbottom to get him to follow instructions for once.

Vernon looked questioningly at his guest.

"Let me introduce myself. I'm Stevens, Darren Stevens. I am part of a conglomerate that owns construction companies. The company we purchase drills from has gone under. I'm looking for a new supplier. I was wondering if I could take you out to lunch so we can discuss matters. There is a lovely little Italian place on the first floor of the Regent Hotel where I am staying."

Dursley smiled, "Let's do business."

20 minutes later...

While Dursley perused the menu Agent 009 slipped sleeping draught into Vernon's drink.

10 minutes after that...

"Thanks for helping me bring him up here. He must not be feeling very well." Mr. Stevens handed a fiver to the bellboy.

Agent 009 pulled several hairs from Dursley's head, storing them for future use. He then searched Dursley's jacket pocket and borrowed Dursley's keys. He considered borrowing Dursley's clothes, but was too disgusted by the thought so he would need to transfigure his own to look like Dursley's instead. Before leaving the hotel room he called Grunnings and left a message with the secretary regarding the closing of Vernon's nephew's school and that Vernon would need to pick the child up from the train station.

Agent 009 found a public restroom between the hotel and Grunnings where he stopped and took a swig of polyjuice potion and morphed into Vernon Dursley.

'Vernon' returned to work where his secretary 'informed him' of the message from his nephew's school. He told his secretary he needed to run home. 009 located Dursley's car, got in and drove to Privet Drive.

"Vernon! You're home early!"

It threw him for a second, having that snooty b. Tuney calling him Vernon, but only for a second. He had looked into some of Vernon's memories during their brief lunch and knew how he was likely to respond. "That blasted freak place is sending the boy back to us."

A collision of images flamed through her mind of her sister's desires manifesting with a meer thought, of her own attempts to cause things to change and the hollowness and anger derived from a lack of power. That awful letter that was some timid man's excuse of a death notification, a plea and a threat. The baby bundled in a basket forcing her to face again her own lack, thieving power from the child to finally gaining some for her own and emotionally and physically shoving the child away when that power, too, left her empty. The giant that came to give the brat power, then repeatedly dumped him back on them, forcing her again and again to cope with her lack of control of her life as the boy gained more and more power over his own life. The spying, gossiping neighbors. The all encompassing fear that someone would discover Harry's magic. "He can't come back."

"Don't you think I'd bloody leave him there if we could! All I know is that one of those freaks called my office! My office! Told my secretary that I had to pick him up from the train station at 6:00. I'm just here to add a lock to his door, bloody bedroom thief. Should have left him in the cupboard." Vernon grumbled as he climbed the stairs.

Agent 009 easily found the correct bedroom. He entered the room and enlarged the Dieter's Treasure Box and slid it under the bed. Harry's new wardrobe was already in the clothes section. With a few shifted blankets the box was hidden. The locks were next. One made the Dursley's lock useless, the other made it so Harry could lock the Dursleys out. Lastly, Agent 009 stuck a letter and the debit card under Harry's pillow.

With the first S in Mr. Fuss taken care of (Security) he only had one thing left to take care of, the second S, Socialization.

"Petunia dear, could you pour us some lemonade. This thing has gotten me so flustered."

"Of course, dear." Petunia brought the drinks into the lounge.

"Do we have any biscuits?"

"I bought some this morning." While Petunia retrieved the biscuits 009 add a compulsion potion to her glass.

Vernon bit a cookie, "I was thinking it might be a good idea to get the boy a membership to the local Y. It is 30 pounds a year for residents. It would keep him out from underfoot."

Petunia's eyebrows rose at the phrase, 'get the boy,' but by the time the word 'membership' had fallen out of 'Vernon's' mouth the compulsion potion had begun its work. "I'll see to it tomorrow."

'Vernon' headed back to 'work'; Snape went back to the carpark at Grunnings. He retraced his footsteps to the restroom and waited to morph back into himself, then returned to the hotel.

009 cast a compulsion charm on the dozing Vernon. "You will be civil towards your nephew, you will be civil towards your nephew, you will..." A few memory charms later and Vernon remembered having lunch at the Italian restaurant then returning to work where his secretary told him he needed to pick up his nephew from the train station. He also remembered a modified version of the rest of 009's afternoon. Snape apparated the two of them to Mr. Dursley's vehicle then magicked some reviving potion into Vernon's gullet. Job done 009 vanished from sight.

I am sorry to disappoint those who hoped for a father/son relationship with Snape and Harry. I enjoy reading those, but that is not what this will be. This is a Snape at his Slytherin, spy best taking care of the things he feels responsible for dealing with while maneuvering around the laws and regulations that Forbid him from solving the problems through a more direct route.

I hope you enjoyed the chapter!