Chapter 2
Rose entered the console room, having come from the clothing department that the Doctor called the wardrobe. The Doctor and Jack turned to look, and their mouths fell open.
"Have I put all this on right," she asked, holding her arms out so that the voluminous sleeves hung down. "The instructions said that the belt thing has to dangle down the back in Kyoto."
She was dressed in a traditional Kimono of the Muromachi period, and the 'belt thing', the obi, was a wide sash around her middle. She wore bright red lipstick, and her pale complexion meant that she didn't need the white face powder, that was common among the women of this period. Her blonde hair was styled up on her head in an imitation of the traditional style.
"Oh wow!" Jack said, giving her a wolf whistle as she did a turn.
The Doctor gave her an appreciative smile. "You look beautiful, and that blonde hair will make you the talk of Kyoto."
"You don't look half bad yourself," Rose replied. They'd been to the wardrobe and managed to dress quickly, wearing the male montsuki version of the kimono, which was black, with a haori half coat, and a culotte-like hakama.
None of them were wearing the traditional geta sandals, opting instead to wear their trainers, just in case.
"Now, remember, this is feudal Japan, and etiquette is everything, so remember to bow. We are going to meet General Ashikaga Takauji, one of the main players in Kyoto."
"Will it be safe with all those Samurai around, carryin' those sharp swords?" Rose asked.
"Very," the Doctor said. "They have a code of conduct, and do not use their swords lightly. In fact the Samurai are very cultured and enjoy all the arts."
The TARDIS had landed in a courtyard garden of a Zen temple, where an old, grey haired, puzzled looking gardener/monk was looking at them. Rose was looking around at the beautiful, traditional architecture.
"Oh this is beautiful," she breathed.
The Doctor walked up to the monk and bowed. "Greetings kind sir, please forgive the intrusion into your sanctuary. We are travellers from afar, visiting your beautiful city, and are searching for the esteemed General Ashikaga Takauji."
"Good day to you all, you have an interesting shrine there," he said with a smile. "General Takauji will be in his residence at the barracks."
"Thank you kind sir," the Doctor said, as he bowed again.
They passed through the ornate archway, and walked down the main road of the city, towards the barracks. Rose's blonde hair, and their European features caused a number of curious looks from local residents who were out and about on this pleasant, spring morning.
"So tell me, why are we here, in 14th century Kyoto?" Rose asked, as she bowed politely to an elderly woman who was looking at her blonde hair in amazement.
"Swordsmanship," he said simply. "Every so often I get feelings, urges to do something. I've learnt to take notice of these feelings, because they are usually essential to my continued survival."
"And you feel the need to learn how to use a sword?" Jack asked suspiciously. From what he'd seen of the Doctor so far, he seemed to be more of a pacifist, than a warrior, and he was right, for this incarnation. If he'd have met him a few months ago, he would have seen a man who was as ruthless as any Japanese shogun.
"I already know how to use a sword, I've had lessons from some of the best swordsmen in Europe, broadsword, sabre, foil, but the samurai, they've taken swordsmanship and turned it into an art form."
Ashikaga stood and bowed to his guests. "Ishi, you honour me with your wish to study under me," he said with a warm smile. He had shoulder length black hair, with a moustache and goatee beard. His eyes were dark, but full of warmth and humour.
"And this must be Rōzu, your 'one who remains at home'. My lady, you have a rare beauty, the likes of which my eyes have not seen before."
"Thank you sir," Rose said with a bow. She made a mental note to ask the Doctor what 'one who remains at home' meant. The TARDIS had obviously translated it literally, and she had a feeling she wasn't going to like it.
"Is Jakku your servant or bodyguard," Ashikaga asked.
Jack gave a laugh as he bowed. "They wish; I'm a friend and travelling companion."
"So, Doct…, er, Ishi, what do me an' Jack do while you're tryin' to chop each other to pieces?" Rose asked.
"You can call me Doctor, Ishi is Japanese for doctor, and you can go shopping if you want to."
Rose's face lit up. "Shoppin', really? Brilliant!"
"And I presume you have some good taverns in Kyoto?" Jack asked the general.
Ashikaga gave a single laugh. "We do indeed, I will assign one of my lieutenants to escort you and show you around. He will also deter unwanted attention; we don't see many foreigners in Kyoto."
"Thank you general, that will allow me to not worry about Rōzu, and focus on the training." He turned to Rose and Jack, gave them a cheeky grin, and bowed. "See you two later then, and Jack..., stay out of trouble."
They burst through the doors of the TARDIS fell forwards on to the floor grating in fits of laughter. They heard the muffled 'thump' and 'oof' of the lynch mob outside hitting the TARDIS door, followed by 'get off' and you're crushing me', as other bodies pushed forward.
"So what exactly WAS the problem?" the Doctor asked with raised eyebrows, talking like a headmaster to a disruptive pupil.
"Oh let me," Rose said with a giggle, her eyes sparkling with mirth. "Y'know what it's like when lads get the ale down their necks an' start chattin'? Well, Jack just happened to brag that he wouldn't mind beddin' a couple a geishas, if ya know what I mean?" She tapped the side of her nose and winked in an imitation of Jack.
"What's so wrong with that?" Jack asked in all innocence.
The Doctor and Rose just looked at each other, and suddenly exploded into fits of uncontrollable laughter. With tears in their eyes, they picked themselves up off the floor and headed for the console. The Doctor started up the time rotor, before they all went to get changed.
The Doctor returned to the console room wearing his usual 'man in black' outfit with the 'cool' leather jacket, while Jack was wearing jeans and T-shirt. Rose appeared a short while afterwards, wearing black trousers, and a dark pink zip up top with 'Punky Fish' on the back, over a white vest top.
Jack was still a bit miffed that they hadn't told him about geishas being male in the fourteenth century; he'd have been a lot more subtle if he'd have known, and they wouldn't have been run out of town by a lynch mob.
The Doctor and Rose were still laughing about that, and Jack finally gave up trying to be annoyed at them and laughed himself, it would be just the kind of stunt he would pull himself. As they laughed together, the walls of the TARDIS seemed to get brighter, and the Doctor, seemed to drift away from Rose and Jack, without actually moving. The TARDIS faded, and he found himself floating in a swirling tunnel, slowly descending towards a dusty, orangey - brown floor below.
"Well, I suppose I had better return this hat to its owner," he heard a familiar, gravelly voice say, and for a moment he felt as though there was someone else with him in the vortex, rising as he descended.
He dropped out of the portal into a crouch, to absorb the impact of the landing.
"Rose? Jack?" He called out into the empty, dilapidated barn. Light seeped in through the wall slats, illuminating bits of abandoned farm machinery, tractor tyres, a frame for a seedling propagator, and various wooden crates. Arched beams curved up to form a roof.
"Hang on… I know this place," he said, as he reluctantly turned and looked over his shoulder. His breath caught in his chest as he spied the brass inlaid clockwork box. "Oh no, no, no, no! Don't make me relive this again," he pleaded.
Before he could contemplate whether the Moment would respond, he heard faint voices coming from the portal. "You are, by your own admission, a vagabond."
"Oh yes, yes, very much so. Phase one," another familiar voice said.
"Lift off in five seconds from now. Five. Four. Three. Two. One. Zero," a voice said over the speaker, as the rocket containing the decoy satellite launched. The Martian Ice Warriors were using a homing signal to guide their invasion fleet to the Moon, and the Doctor, Jamie and Zoe were trying to stop them.
"With any luck, we should have some nice heavy rain before long. Ah, there we are," the Doctor said as he entered the Transmat Control Centre with Jamie and Zoe.
A team of Ice Warriors had beamed to Earth to take over the Weather Control Bureau, and prevent it from raining. Rain would destroy the fungus seed pods they were using to terraform the planet for Martians. The Doctor had jury rigged an infrared device which melted the Ice Warriors and gave them back control of the Bureau.
"Yes, the satellite," Assistant Commander Gia Kelly said.
"Isn't that a beautiful sight?" Professor Eldred said.
"We finished and installed the homing device. It's working perfectly," Gia said with pride.
"Well done," the Doctor said, giving her a warm smile from under his pudding basin hair cut.
"Doctor?" Gia said tentatively.
"Yes, Miss Kelly?"
"I know we're sending up a false signal, but aren't some of the Martian ships bound to follow the right one?"
"There isn't going to be a right one," he told her. "There's only going to be ours, the wrong one, and that's going to lead the entire Martian fleet into an orbit around the sun."
"What about Slaar's signal?" she asked. Commander Slaar was the Ice Lord who was in charge of the invasion plan.
"Oh, obviously that has to be stopped," he said as a matter of fact.
The Professor looked puzzled. "But how?"
"Well, as soon as the satellite is up, I shall Transmat myself to the moon and destroy their homing device."
Gia looked horrified. "They'll kill you on sight."
"Oh, I don't think so. I've rigged up a rather interesting little device here," he said, holding up the infrared projector.
"What's it for?"
He raised his eyebrows and smiled. "Well, it's a development of the solar energy device that you so successfully used on the moon, only I've succeeded in rendering it portable. I've got a solar battery."
As they'd been talking, the satellite had been deployed and started transmitting.
"Well, there it is," Gia said. "It's in orbit. We're now picking up the alien's homing signal from the moon."
"Well, that means that their invasion fleet is getting closer. There's not time to be lost. Now, are you quite clear? As soon as I have succeeded in destroying their signal you must activate our signal in the satellite," the Doctor told them.
Commander Radnor straightened up and puffed out his chest. "Oh, we'll be ready."
"Right, then I'll be off," the Doctor said.
"Oh Doctor?" Zoe said as he approached the cubicle.
"Yes? What is it, Zoe?"
"You will be careful, won't you?" she said with concern.
He gave her an appreciative, fatherly look. "Don't worry, Zoe, I will... Are you ready, Miss Kelly?"
"But Doctor, our control of Transmat hasn't been tested," Gia said worriedly.
"Then now's the time to test it."
She operated the Transmat controls, and the Doctor realised that something wasn't quite right. In the other Transmat journeys, the view out of the cubicle changed as he moved from one location to the other. Now, he seemed to be in some kind of swirling tunnel that seemed vaguely familiar, but for the lives of him, he couldn't think why.
He could see a vivid green carpet approaching, and he braced himself for a landing. He dropped out of the portal into the grassy undergrowth of an arboreal forest.
He sat up, and looked around the tranquil wood, pulling bits of grass and leaf litter from his hair. "Oh dear. Unless I'm very much mistaken, this isn't the moon!"