A/N: Welcome to the new followers! Thank you for joining in :).

Still trying to keep things light during the beginning of the drama... A lot of you are asking for more of the funny... I'll see what I can do considering the current Grey situation it might be a tad difficult sometimes...in saying that there's Nothing like a "kids say the darnedest things" moment to lighten things up :)

To the Honest reviewer - Thanks for your review... Harsh - no, I'm pretty thick skinned so its gonna take a lot more than that to wind me up. You are kind of assuming Ana is going to be a damsel in distress in my story, maybe, just maybe she might be a kick ass ninja wife of a billionaire?

Any who. If you want to check out (my Kate and Elliot's house). Google luxury portfolio international and enter web Id - QSVV. It's a beautiful home. Also if your interested my Elliot - Paul Walker. Yummy o!

Enough of the chit chat -

Chapter 30. - Fluffy nana pansy.

Sawyer brings the R8 to a stop on the pale gravel driveway. Kate and Elliot's house is beautiful. Elliot custom designed and built the house from scratch. He and his crew spent many a hour at the site getting every last detail perfect for the family to move in. Looking up at the gray brick and stucco exterior my heart aches for him.

Sawyer enters the house first. There is no obvious sign of forced entry and the house has been locked up. I give him the house key and the six digit security code.

"Please stay behind me Mrs Grey." Sawyer commands over his shoulder as we walk through the grand 2 storey entrance. I follow his lead into the impressive kitchen. For two people who barely cook their kitchen is amazing. They spent numerous nights debating fixtures and appliances, they wanted everything perfect. It doesn't make sense that she would just take off.

There is a open juice carton on the bench and a half filled glass of Kate's preferred orange juice. The dishwasher is beeping softly. I run my fingers down the carton of juice - lukewarm. She hasn't been here for a few hours at least.

Leaving the kitchen we head upstairs where all the bedrooms are situated. My stomach churns as we enter the master suite - knowing the closet will be the tell tale sign. I know the closet too well to 'not' know if she has packed her bags and gone.

Walking into the room my eyes scan for something, anything that might stand out. The bed is unmade, her pink flannelette comfort pyjamas are flung over the side of the king sized bed. Her laptop is open on the ruffled duvet and there is a notepad and pen on the pillow. Kate likes to work late into the night so nothing seems unusual.

Taking a deep breath I raise my hand to open the walk in wardrobe door.

"Oh Katie." I slump to the floor. "Why? Why?" I would estimate at least a fifth of her clothing is missing. There are several pairs of shoes missing from the racks and her trademark white pea coat is absent from its usual hook.

"Sawyer, would you pack Elliot some clothing, I will go pack Ava a bag."

I enter robotic mode. I have to. I want to curl up in a ball and cry for Kate, for Elliot and little Ava but I need to get out of here and back to them. I drag my feet numbly down the hall, my heels echoing against the polished hard wood floor. I enter the pink extravagance that is Ava's nursery. I find her mauve Louis Vuitton duffle bag - designer baby since the minute she was born - and get to work packing a weeks worth of outfits.

I'm surprised by how little is in her wardrobe. Odd. I look around the room properly and see a bag already packed and sitting on the window seat. Was she planning on taking Ava? What changed her mind?

I shake the thousand questions from my head and continue the task of packing her bag.

When Sawyer and I arrive back at Bellevue I find Christian sitting out on the back lawn. He is deep in thought looking out toward the water.

"Hi." I squeak cautiously as I stroll up beside him. He takes my hand and pulls me down to sit in his lap. "Are you mad?"

"Very."

"I'm sorry...I should have spoken..."

"Anastasia." He interrupts, his voice deceptively soft. "Do you have no regard for my feelings AT ALL. You knew I was occupied with Elliot, yet you purposefully added more stress on top of it all."

"Christian, I'm sorry. I just thought maybe I could...I don't what I thought actually. I just couldn't stand there and do nothing."

"You could have stayed here and looked after our children. You needed to trust that I had our team on it Anastasia. Anything could have been waiting for you at the house."

"I think you under estimate me." I mumble.

"Pardon?" He asks incredulously.

"I said I think you under estimate me. I'm not the same naive, weak, submissive girl you met 3 years ago Christian. I have more to loose these days and a family I'd protect at all costs..." Christian remains silent. It's true. Yes, when I met Christian his past scared me and Elena and Leila intimidated me. Now I realise, who are they? A couple of shameless slappers infatuated my with husband. MY HUSBAND! He chose me. I'm married to him, and with that brings a whole team of security, money at my disposal and a whole lot of resources. I train with Claude regularly, can shoot with accuracy and can drive like Michael Schumacher - despite Christians reservations I took advanced driving lessons after the car chase when we returned from our honeymoon. As far as I'm concerned I'm not completely helpless.

"Pffft, you submissive? Baby you've been anything but since the moment I met you." He chuckles.

"Some of her clothes are missing." I whisper. He nods his head in acknowledgement of hearing me.

"Don't ever leave me." His husky voice reverberates in my ear. Turning on his lap I wrap my arms around his neck.

"Christian, all the chocolate in the world wouldn't make me leave you. Your stuck with me."

"Mmmm...I like being stuck to you." He rolls us over so that I am lying beneath him. "I love you so fucking much." He groans before his lips meet mine. He kisses me softly, passionately. His tongue lightly brushes my top lip causing me to moan and writhe beneath him. His hand runs down my side and grabs hold of my thigh, hitching my leg up.

"Mmmmm, Babe... We are on your parents lawn." I pant, his fingers gliding underneath the hem of my skirt.

"Let's move this to the boathouse." He whispers. Rubbing his erection against my hip.

"Please." My hip bucks against his groin in response. He lowers his mouth and begins biting and nibbling at my breast through my shirt. "Oooo...yes, fuck that's..."

"Mmm that's it baby. Talk dirty." He mumbles. "Whose ya daddy." He chuckles.

"Christian." I giggle and slap his chest playfully. "Are you ever going to let that go?"

"Never." His fingers slide back up my side and he begins to tickle my ribs.

"Noooo, noo. Stop." I manage to scream during fits of laughter.

"You're so fucking sexy when you laugh baby." I open my eyes and he is staring down at me.

I lean up and plant a soft, lingering kiss on his lips which quickly turns heated and all consuming. Oh that tongue...

"Ahemmm." Taylor clears his throat. "Sir."

Christians head drops in frustration. He gives me a quick peck before jumping to his feet and pulling me up.

Taylor walks towards the boathouse to talk to Christian.

"I'll go check on Elliot and the children." I straighten my skirt and sweep the creases from my shirt. "How is he?" I add.

"Gutted." Christian shrugs. "He's angry right now, hurt, devastated. He can't see past the phone message. He thinks she left on her own accord."

"You think otherwise?" I ask.

"I'm not ruling it out."

I sigh loudly. "I wouldn't have ruled it out either but her clothes are gone, she had a bag packed for Ava... It's not looking likely that it was anything else."

"I better go see what Taylor wants." He kisses me softly before turning and walking to the boathouse.

"Hi baby girl." I plant a kiss on Phoebes sticky cheek. She is sitting in a high chair in the kitchen squishing banana through her fingers as Grace potters around the pantry.

"Oh Ana." Grace turns when she hears my voice. "You're back. You know I'm pretty sure Christian grew a few gray hairs when he found out you had gone." She looks at me questioningly.

"I know. I'm sorry. I just had to see if Kate was at the house. I couldn't believe it... It's just..."

"I know darling." Her expression softens. "Elliot's not let go of Ava since you left. He's holding onto her for dear life."

"Understandable." I sigh. "I think she was planning on taking her." I mutter. "She had a bag packed in her nursery."

"Gaa, gaa, da, da." Phoebe coos. Rubbing banana through her hair.

"Look at you Princess. We need to give you a bath don't we." I say animatedly.

"Let me do it Ana, please. I need to keep busy." Grace unbuckles Phoebe from her chair and tickles her. "Teddy is with Mia in the den playing with the building blocks." Grace smiles before she leaves with a grubby Phoebe.

Elliot is in the living room alone. Someone must have managed to pry Ava from him. He has a scotch in his hand.

"How are you doing El." I ask plonking myself next to him on the plush sofa. He reeks. How long has he been drinking for?

"Let's see , my wife left me via voice messssage and abandoned our daughter." He slurs slightly. "Never been betterr."

"Christian and I were thinking you could come and stay with us for a little while..."

"Whatever, not as if I 'ave a wifeyyy to go home toooo."

"Give her some time Elliot. She'll come back."

"We'll see." He skulls back the rest of his drink.

"Hey buddy." I greet Teddy as he runs into the room.

"Hiiii Fucka." He sings

"Teddy, we don't say that word. It's naughty." I growl.

Elliot is chuckling beside me. "Well if that ain't Christian Greys son." He hoots. "Teddy, champ, little man.." Elliot tries to look serious. "Don't call yourrrr Mommy that, you save that one for Daddy." He ruffles Teddy's cooper locks. I stifle a giggle.

"Teddy i'm going to go get a drink of juice, would you like one?" Mia walks in and sits opposite Elliot.

"Hi Mia." I smile, " juice Teddy?"

"Pease tank you Fucka."

"Teddy, stop that. I will put you in time out next time." I turn and head for the kitchen to get some drinks. Gosh, this swearing is more serious than I thought. We really need to stomp this out.

EPOV

"Why u souwnd fummy." Teddy asks innocently. Oh crap, I can't tell my nephew I'm half pissed on scotch because my wife decided to walk out on me. I shudder.

"I drank tooo much, don't you worry tho champ, when you get older your uncle Elliot will teach you everything you need to know k. I will show you how to wind Daddy up too."

"My Daddy Mommy Fucka."

"Teddy!" Mia gasps. "We don't say those words remember". I am laughing hysterically. Only I would find that funny. Even in this depressed drunken stupor.

"You are the best Teddy." I hiccup. Mia looks at me sternly for encouraging Teddy's behaviour. Give me a break, my fucking wife just left me. "You know tho Ted, why don't you call Daddy something else. How about pansy or Nancy... And instead of saying fucker, say fluffy. " I shrug.

"K." Teddy says.

"So what do we call Daddy?"

"My Daddy be a fluffy nana pansy." He concentrates hard on the words.

"Nancy dude, nancy."

"Nannn-seee." He exaggerates.

"Shot dude. High five." I snort with laughter - and high five him softly - Thankful that a 3 year old has managed to make me laugh during the shittiest day of my life.

APOV

Walking back into the living area with our drinks I'm surprised but pleased to hear Elliot laughing.

"Where's my Pansy Daddy." Teddy asks me as I sit the tray down on the coffee table.

"Ah Daddies outside with Mr Taylor son, he will be in soon."

"Me go find Gramma Grace." He chirps.

"Teddy, your juice." I yell as he runs full speed from the room. "Did he just call Christian a pansy?" I ask. Mia and Elliot both look to the ceiling shrugging their shoulders. "Oh real innocent guys, real innocent." I giggle. "That'll go down well.

Elliot and Mia both look at me as we all burst into hysterics.

CPOV

Walking back into the house I'm confident I made the right decision.

We are all staying at Mom and Dads for dinner. Gail and Greta have been busy cooking. Sawyer has been briefing the 2 new CP's I've hired for Elliot and Ava. Reynolds and Prescott were sent back to Fort Grey to work on the info Sawyer collected at Elliot's house. Taylor has filled me in on what we know, our suspicions and run his plans past me for approval.

What a fucking day. First the fucking porn at the office, now my sister in law is MIA. I need a fucking drink.

Everyone is seating themselves at the table when I walk in.

"Come have some dinner son." Mom motions for me to sit. "It's been a long day, eat."

I sit on my usual chair next to Ana and rest my arm behind her back.

"Anything." She whispers. I shake my head no. It is not unnoticed by Mom and Elliot. Elliot's head drops.

"Hiiii Daddy." My son screeches from across the table.

"Hey my main man. How was your day? Have you been a good boy for Grandma Grace?"

"Yip yip yip me be good boy. You be pansy?"

"Huh?" I look at him puzzled. Scratching my head trying to think of what word he may have meant. ... Pansy...Busy, pretty, pouty, handsy, hungry... Oh fuck me- why can't kids just come out talking properly from the get go. I look to Ana for some help, she always understands him better than me. She shrugs and looks down at her plate.

"I'm good son, thanks." That'll have to do. Elliot snorts trying to contain a strangled laugh.

"You good panseeeee?" He cocks his head questioningly, his arms folded against his chest . Seriously I have no idea what he's trying to say, but fuck he looks likes me when he does that.

"Yes Teddy, now be a good boy and eat your dinner.

"Kay Daddy fluffy." What the fuck?

I cut into my steak and shove a forkful into my mouth. God dam this is good. Porterhouse steak covered in a creamy mushroom and bacon sauce.

Despite Elliot's mood he clears his plate in minutes. Not a scrap of sauce or mashed potato left behind.

Dad walks in as everyone is finishing up.

"Good evening everyone." He places his briefcase by his chair and kisses my mother on the cheek before sitting. He looks at Elliot in sympathy. Mom probably phoned him and filled him in.

"Hiiiiiiii Grampa." Teddy yells excitedly.

"Well Hello there Theodore. How is my favourite grandson?"

"Yip yip yip. Me good." He beams standing in his chair."

"Sit down on your seat honey." Ana's soft voice commands him.

"Grampa." He contorts his face, looking toward the sky, searching his vocabulary. "Me be talk to Uncle Lelly."

"Did you now?." Dad replies. "And what did uncle 'Lelly' say." Carrick grins.

"Uncle Lelly say no."

"I'm sure Uncle Elliot...," Teddy cuts Dad off.

"My Daddy no Fucka Mommy no more." He says innocently.

"Theodore Raymond Grey." Ana stands.

"Son." I stand at the same time. "That's enough." I growl. Elliot is shaking the table he's laughing so hard. Mia's shoulders are jerking, her hands are covering her face. Well I'm glad Elliot's having a laugh at my expense.

"Time out Teddy." Ana growls, her face flush with embarrassment. Hell, even I'm embarrassed by that one. 'Daddy no fuck Mommy no more', could that have come out sounding any worse?

"But, but, but.. Daddy nan-seee, fluffy pansy uncle Lelly say me." He grunts.

APOV

Oh Dear. Run Elliot Run.

Christian is puffing like a freakin steam train beside me.

"Teddy, come with me." Christian says, spookily calm. He pushes his chair back and walks around to pick Teddy up before disappearing with him.

"Well, that was... Um...yes. More potato anyone?" Carrick picks up the serving bowl of potato and offers it to us.

"I'm good thank you Carrick." I hold my hand up motioning no as he offers me some. "I um, sorry about that."

"Ana, dear. It's not your fault. Little children pick up everything. My SONS...," Grace hisses her S's, "well they didn't get their foul mouths from us, that's for certain."

CPOV

Count to ten. 1, 2, 3... A fluffy nancy really? God dam fucking... I knew all my past shit karma would come and kick me in the ass somehow. 4,5... Oh god, I'm doomed, I've created a mini me...6, 7, 8... Breath in, out, in... Lord only knows what phoebes going to be like. Fuck, who am I kidding. She looks just like her mother, I'm going to be swatting fuckers away with a baseball bat and she'll be fighting me every step of the way. With a fucking smart mouth too I bet... Inhale...exhale... 9,10...

"Teddy, son. Come sit on the bed." I pat the mattress of my childhood bed. Teddy does a flying leap onto the bed and bounds onto my lap.

"Teddy, it's not nice to swear and call people names. Daddy wants you to stop it okay."

"Kay Daddy."

"I mean it son. Those words aren't nice words to say. And well we want to be good boys and say nice things to make Mommy happy and proud don't we?"

"Yip yip yip. Me loves Mommy."

"I know you do son, and so do I, very much. Just like I love you and Phoebe very much."

"An uncle Lelly." He chirps.

"And even Uncle Lelly." I chuckle. "What I'm trying to say Teddy is... We want to make the people we love proud of us by not saying naughty words. So we need to try really hard not to say those words."

"Kay, me no say fuck no more."

"Good boy. Daddy will try not say it anymore too okay. Soooo buddy, I think we should make some rules. If you say the 'f...' word again, you will have to sit in the naughty corner for 3 minutes." Fuck yea I'm channelling my inner super nanny.

"Me no want to sit in naughty cornaaa." He pouts.

"You won't have to if you don't say naughty words."

"What me get if me not say em." He asks. Is he trying to negotiate with me? Cunning little...

"What do you think you should get?"

"Me want you take me see wiggles."

"What's wiggles son?" I ask having no clue.

"Wiggles be jeff an muzzy and dinosaur."

"Okay." Must be some movie or some shit. "Dad will take you to see wiggles if you don't swear for the rest of the week, and we can talk more about some other rewards later.

"Kay cos me want a new house."

"Yeah," I scoff. "How about you ask me that one again in 20 years."

"Kay me will."

"Good, now starting from now no swearing or calling anyone any names. Are you ready to go down and say your sorry to Mommy, Grandma Grace and Grandpa Carrick for using bad language at the table?"

"Yip yip yip."

"That's my boy." I pull him to my chest and squeeze him tightly. "I love you Teddy."

"Me loves you Daddy."

APOV

Christian walks into the living room where we have all moved for drinks. Teddy is sitting on his shoulders his hands holding onto Christians - which are raised above his head.

"Look Mommy me flying." He giggles.

Christian lowers him down to the ground and he comes running up to me.

"I'm sorwy Mommy. Me not say bad words anymore."

"Thank you Teddy. I'm pleased to hear that." I tickle under his neck then give him a sloppy kiss.

"You ready to go home baby." Christian asks from the doorway. I nod while continuing to tickle Teddy.

"I'll go load the car and get Phoebe. You coming El?"

"Yeah bro, you got better top shelf at your place." I roll my eyes. Christian notices and squints his eyes at me. Mmmm just what I need after today. A good spanking, a little Ben and Jerry's and some more of that tingling lube. I sink my teeth into my lip with Christian still watching to secure the deal.

CPOV

The drive back to Fort Grey is spent making small talk - trying to avoid the Kate situation.

"Baby what's Wiggles. It's a movie right?"

"You mean the wiggles?"

"I guess. Teddy want to see it, what is it."

"They're are that children's group he watches all the time. The four guys and the dinosaur and some pirate. They are coming to Seattle for a live show. He's been asking me to take him. Honestly Christian, I love our son, but not enough to sit through 2 hours of 'toot toot chugga chugga big red car." I joke.

"You mean those gay fuckers who dance around in those hideous fucking colours?"

"The same."

"Why didn't anyone fucking tell me, I'm not taking him to that shit."

"You told him you'd take him?" She yells incredulously.

"Well yeah, if he doesn't swear for the rest of the week."

"Oh my god Christian. Do you not knowing how annoying they are. Or how many 1000's of screaming kids and Moms are going to be crammed into that show."

"Oh shit. What have I gotten myself into."

"I don't know Christian, but if you promised him, you WILL keep your promise. And you can count me out. There's nothing in the world that would make me go to a wiggles show."

"You would do that to me? feed me to the 100s of no doubt horny housewives, all on my lonesome?" I pout pulling out the Grey charm.

"Honey, pull your lip in, you did this on your own."

"There's only one thing for it then. I have to make him swear."

"Christian Grey, if you make our son swear to get out of a promise I will spank you soooo hard!" She growls, giving me the death glare.

"Baby," I chuckle. "That's more of an incentive than a deterrent."

"I mean it Christian, don't you dare! Anyway, What did Taylor want?"

Oh shit. I hate lying to my wife but if her and Elliot knew they'd make our job 10 times worse just trying to contain the two's superhero shenanigans. It's better if they are left believing their own conclusions - at least until I can prove otherwise.

"Nothing baby. Her bag and clothes are missing, she packed a bag for Ava..."

"I just don't get it..." She exhales.

"Neither do I, neither do I." But I will fucking find out.