All of my friends are busy, so I have nothing to do all day. This is the worst way to spend my last day of summer. I can't even look forward to going to school and talking to them since I go to a different school now.

I have to stop thinking about it or I'm going to and I don't want to start that today. Of course crying is hardly voluntarily and so tears begin to fall even though I don't want them to. I have to stop crying and the only way I can do that is to be in public; nothing stops tears like the chance of public embarrassment.

I call out to cupcake, the family dog and chase her into a corner so that I can leash her. She often fights me on these walks but once her leash is on she accepts that she has no choice. I walk out the backdoor since I don't feel like grabbing my key to lock up.

I smile at the middle-aged women power walking and then the two girls on their bikes. I remember how much easier it was as a child before people started really questioning you about your future.

At five I said I wanted to be a vet ; at thirteen someone told me the reality of the job. I would have to collect stool samples, crop dogs' tails, and put animals to sleep. Needless to say that stopped being my answer to the question, so I started to say doctor.

That one only lasted until the end of freshman year when I passed Biology with a C- minus. I was hardly Med school material and I knew I disliked school far too much to commit myself to that much schooling.

I just started saying I wasn't sure and dealing with the awkward silence that usually followed. I accepted that I was not a person who knew what I wanted in life and was simply doing what my peers were doing. The difference being that I was struggling with everything far more than my peers were and it made me a disappointment for my whole family because of it.

I finally saw the entrance to the old elementary school and I made my way to the swings; no one was there so I tied cupcake's leash around the pole and sat down on the swing. I'm so glad that when we moved here I saw this place, my old town had one almost identical except it was bigger and more crowded.

I decide to start walking back since I have a big day ahead of me with a new school. I untie cupcake's leash and start to walk back from where I came in, but then I look back and see the woods. Even though I know its a bad idea I decide to take a little walk new school be damned; I already know it is gonna suck.

I start my walk into the woods while cupcake grunts at my new route. Rightfully, so since the path in the woods is riddled with vines and much to my displeasure thorns. Several of which are now in my leg, so I decide to sit down on a stump and pluck them out.

I get to the fourth one without any blood, but some of them are lodged in deeper so my leg starts to bleed. Just what I need to walk home a bloody mess and have scarred legs. As I stand up I see the bush move and I wonder what it is. I decide its probably just a small animal like a rabbit or maybe a deer, so I decide to walk back with cupcake leading a faster than normal pace.

I follow her and her little strides with ease. Before we leave the woods she walks over further into the woods probably to pee. Except she is smelling something and I immediately pull her back once I see what it is.

Its a dead fox that looks disfigured and as I walk out I realize despite that it doesn't have any blood on it. Not where an animal would have killed and if an animal did kill it why is its body still in tact.

I put it out of my mind I begin my walk home and eventually once I get there I untie cupcake and take a shower. I eat a silent dinner with my mom and dad and then plan my outfit for tomorrow. I go to sleep with a feeling of absolute dread about what I was starting tomorrow, I never thought my Junior year would look so bleak.