Lisbon knew she was driving way too fast, adrenaline was pumping through her body and her mind was racing in synchrony with Van Pelt's car. They needed to get a good night's rest before starting another work day at the CBI headquarters, but Van Pelt was by no means in any condition to stay awake, let alone to drive. Teresa had considered driving her home herself, but it seemed more practical if both stayed at her apartment.
Generally, she would've enjoyed driving through the deserted streets, with the only noise coming from the car's engine and her protégée, who was uttering cute little snoring sounds, but this was different.
This wasn't the calm, relaxing bliss she usually felt when driving home after a long day at work.
She glanced at the passenger seat, and her heart rate rose at the sight of her sleeping colleague.
"What the hell is the matter with you?", she mentally reproached herself. "That's just Van Pelt, and she's drunk."
But the image of their bodies pressed against the car was stuck in her head, which she acknowledged with a nervous chuckle.
"I hope your taste in music is not as horrifying as Jane's," she said to herself, and reached for a random button on the dashboard.
Half an hour and many cheesy songs later, Lisbon parked in the driveway of her apartment building, glad they had made it there without any major incidents aside from a deer crossing the road.
Of course, she couldn't be more wrong.
"All right, sleeping beauty, here we are," she said and opened the door to the passenger seat.
"Boss, I..."
But the redhead didn't get to finish her sentence. Before Lisbon could react, the contents of Grace's stomach landed on her white shirt, making it stick to her skin.
"Yuck, that's disgusting!" she exclaimed, scrunching her nose in revulsion at the acid smell of Van Pelt's fluids.
She was pissed at Jane, he had left the two women alone at the bar, not even courteous enough to come up with a decent excuse for bailing on them. What was even more infuriating: he had encouraged Grace to have one drink after the other, ignoring Lisbon's furious glances and Grace's half-hearted protests. If she didn't know better, Teresa would've assumed he was aiming to seduce the young agent.
"Boss..." Grace called feebly. Damn, she had completely forgotten about her while thinking of new ways to murder Jane.
"Fuck you," she mumbled into the darkness and turned towards the girl in the car. Her anger evaporated at once, her colleague was on the verge of tears, and she looked pale, ill even.
"Oh, I didn't mean you, it's Jane I want to go and fuck himself," she said, but Grace just stared at her dumbfounded.
"I'm sorry I yelled at you," she added when Van Pelt remained silent. Giving in to an impulse, Lisbon leaned forward and cleaned the corners of Grace's mouth with her thumbs.
She paused for a moment and looked at Grace, who was still utterly confused. Before the situation got too weird, the senior agent stepped back and offered Grace her hand, which the younger woman gladly took.
"I can't believe you said fuck," said Grace while they slowly walked to the doorstep of Lisbon's apartment. "Mr. Mentalist wouldn't be very pleased," she added with an embarrassed smile.
"Mr. Mentalist?" asked Teresa with a mocking smile. "Is that what he calls himself now?"
Grace blushed heavily, and she was thankful for the darkness surrounding them.
"Yes. I mean no, that's what I call him when... Never mind," she said a little too quickly, tripped and almost took Teresa down with her.
"Careful!" hissed the senior agent, slightly amused. Van Pelt posed no real challenge, she was way too easy to read, and that's what Teresa liked most about her. Her genuine candidness, paired with just the right amount of sweetness, weren't qualities one could easily find inside the CBI; Teresa could tell men liked her. Not men, exclusively. She quickly dismissed that particular thought from her mind and made Van Pelt recline against the wall of the building, while she opened the door for them.