Harry Potter/Deadpool and Cable Crossover

Dear Professor McGonagall,

I am sorry to say that young Harold won't be joining your school this or any other year, I know that what I am about to say will sound unbelievable, but I come from the future and between the information I have there is the little detail about your world and what will happen should Harold follow the plans of your Headmaster.

I already contacted Professor Xavier and we will soon take care of your "Dark Lord" issue in a way that will both remove him from the equation AND stop his followers from using the peace following his demise from taking a further hold on your world's politics as I know will happen should Mister Dumbledore's plan continue.

With the help of the X-men we are also preparing to follow Harold's magical education and so we find useless for him to travel all the way from the USA to Britain where the majority, that is to say everyone, of his enemies also reside and will have free reign to plan his death.

Please don't try rescue plans, I saw what would happen if you all "wait" for him to be old enough to fight and trust me, you DON'T want to give to your Death Eaters all that time to prepare.

Sincerely,

Cable.

Ps: due to some personal issues I am forced to leave young Harold with an old acquittance of mine, he may not be completely sane, but he happens to like the boy so I don't think he will be preoperative in case you approach him, be advised.

The Aftermath -

Severus Snape and Minerva McGonagall were silently marching towards the run-down apartment with a deep scowl on their face, although they were scowling for different reasons.

McGonagall was angry to see a young boy not only living in what the American called "a rat-hole" but also with a man that by Mister Cable own admission was "not exactly sane" and had been there since that blasted night Albus forced her to live the boy on that doorstep.

Oh! she had been angry and had showed to the old man what she thought of his plans, that's why even now the Headmaster still couldn't sit properly nor look at matchsticks and spoons without flinching and whimpering.

Snape just hated the Potter bloodline, I don't need to waste words to talk about something we all already know.

Once reached the right door, the Transfiguration Professor started to pound on the wooden frame with strength one couldn't expect from a woman her age that had the whole thing almost get teared off of its hinges.

"HOY! I am coming! Don't get your pants into a knot!" a male voice said annoyed, once out the two professors could see a man in a red-and-black spandex suit looking at them in surprise.

"Really? It's my turn already? AWESOME! Hoy, Harry! Come here! It's our crossover now!" the man called out with a giddy voice.

"Our voice is NOT giddy!" a voice in the man's head said offended.

"What's wrong, uncle Wade? Another Yaoi author?" Harry Potter, a young boy Minerva almost mistook for a clone of his own father, said coming out from the kitchen with a chef hat on his head.

"Nah! I killed the last one weeks ago, no, those two are here for the "Rejection Letters" Crossover!" Wade answered, pointing at the two professors.

"Uh?" the two muttered, uncertain.

"Cool! Hey, Uncle Cable already said that I won't go with them so why are they here?" Harry asked.

"I don't know. But I have read the books, all seven downloaded from Internet mind you, and I hate the epilogue so no, he won't come with you," Deadpool said...manly.

"Thank you," the same voice said in the man's head.

"As if a buffoon will stop me, just give me the brat so I can go back doing something more important than this," Snape said, fingering his wand in a casual manner.

"Can I?" Deadpool asked.

"Be my guest, uncle, we both saw him being an ass-hole until his death scene, and I didn't buy a last redemption of a page and an half," Harry answered shrugging.

"What are you talking ab-BLAM!" Whatever the Potion Master was about to say stopped when Wade took out a rather big gun (his own way to compensate for something) to shot him.

"HOY!"

"Now, I kinda like you, can you just turn around and tell your people we are not interested?" Deadpool said, moving the gun on McGonagall's forehead.

"I am here for..." she tried saying.

"Miss, in my letter I said to not come here," a new voice said.

"Uncle Cable!" Harry said happily.

"Mister Cable, I presume?" the stern woman asked.

"Exactly, as for now Professor Xavier managed to "Shut Down" the brain of your Dark Lord, the man he was possessing and his various Marked followers, he was distraught to do this, but he understood the importance of this, from now on you are free and no amount of immortality will help him since his mind is now completely empty," Cable answered.

"I guess then that Mister Potter won't join Hogwarts?" Minerva asked with a sad tone.

"I don't see any use in that, the Philosopher Stone had already been recovered by Mister Flamel and the Goblet of Fire destroyed, we may come visit you once or twice since you used to know Harold's parents, but he will have his education here," the man answered.

"I see, I just hope to see the boy live in a more "proper" place though," McGonagall said.

"Hey! My apartment is awesome, thank you!" Deadpool said, crossing his arms.

"I'll take my leave then, I'll have to report Severus' death and our failure," the woman said, taking the dead Potion Master and Apparating away.

"He won't be missed," Harry commented.

"I did so little here! This was supposed to be MY Crossover! Instead Cable took all the glory, what about me!" Deadpool said with a whine.

"Damn it, Wade! Stop being such an idiot!" Cable roared in anger.

"But I want my show! I have Harry Potter here, I should have a lot of adoring fans by now!" the other answered.

Out of the blue a new voice was heard.

"Mister Wade? Are you ready for your sexy sponge bath?" a VERY sexy nurse asked with a teasing smile, the other four sexy nurses behind her giggling and waving at him.

"And remember! It's clothing optional!" another said with a wide smile.

"UUUH! I love this author! Can he write our new comic book?" Deadpool said, smoothening his suit to join the ladies.

"Of all the people I had to ask..." Cable said, going towards the kitchen grumbling and cursing.

"What about me?" Harry asked with a whine.

"Hello? Is anyone here? I am new and I need a guide around the city," a pretty brunette asked, her parents behind her looking around worried.

"Helloooo! Who are you?" the boy asked.

"I am Hermione and this is my friend Luna, we just moved here with our families, but we don't know the place very well, can you help us?" she asked, the blond behind her waving at him with a dreamy expression.

"Why not? I am all yours!" Harry said with a wide smile, noticing happily how both girls had their cheeks take a reddish tint.

"Thanks, buddy!" the boy muttered while looking up as he left the apartment with the two girls.

"WOOOOOOOH! Best story ever!" Wade could be heard screaming from the bathroom in happiness, the sound of giggles and splashing water echoing in the small apartment.