Disclaimer: If I owned it you could challenge the four old vault hunters to a duel.
Cracking open her eyes Gaige forced her partially frozen body up, her mind racing with questions. How did she survive the moon base? Where there other Hyperion survivors? According to her calculations wreckage should have fallen in Aegrus and it never snowed this heavily there. So why was it snowing? And most importantly why did she not feel broken? The brutal memories floated through her mind but she didn't feel broken, odd. Pushing herself up and the thoughts aside Gaige shuddered at the cold on her right arm. Hesitantly she looked at a very human right arm, then she felt the rest of her very fleshy human body. In shock she barely heard Claptrap ramble on about minions and Sanctuary.
In a daze Gaige followed the others to Claptrap's swanky bachelor pad. Axton was walking with no problem. Maya's face and body wasn't covered in scars. Salvador wasn't kept in a straitjacket. Krieg hadn't snapped. Zer0 was alive. And she wasn't a cyborg.
Still flexing her fingers Gaige cursed her subconscious, only asleep did she remember the brighter days before the pain and loss of all that happened in the process to free Pandora from Jack.
Rolling inside Claptrap moved next to the fireplace his frame quivering with joy. "At last my Minions the time is at hand to join the rebellion and end the Handsome one forever! But first you have to kill Knuckle Dragger a viscous Bullymong who loves picking on innocent claptraps. But we're completely safe here in my impenetrable fortress of solitude! So lonely..." Claptrap's arms slumped in sadness at the last admission. Before any of the Hunters could speak a quickly increasing rumbling began.
The other vault hunters were caught off guard by the sudden appearance of Knuckle Dragger coming in through the skylight and were even more surprised as a laser nailed Knuckle Dragger killing the massive Bullymong instantly.
"Good job newly promoted Minion 1! Just as I planned!" Ignoring Claptrap's joyous cries the Hunters stared in shock at Gaige, who was leaning against a floating robot smirking slightly.
Salvador broke the silence first, "Macarra chica" the others nodded in agreement impressed at both her reflexes and robot. Bowing to the Hunters Gaige introduced herself, "Name's Gaige Mistress of Anarchy and the greatest Mechromancer in the six galaxies. "
Grinning ferally Salvador continued, "Well met chica, I'm Salvador the Gunzerker if you ever need overkill look no further." The roughness of both his voice and wanted poster hid the loyal nature Salvador possessed, at least until Gaige had gotten to know him better. And it had lasted until he cut loose completely and his native blood proved to run hot and psychotic.
Giving a mock salute Axton straightened up "Axton's the name commandoing the game." He spoke with the same devil may care attitude that got him into so much trouble with Dahl and Pandora. According to Tiny Tina Axton had started a relationship with Hammerlock but that had soured after Sawtooth, Axton blamed himself and went deeper into alcohol. If it wasn't for his turret it was unlikely he'd have survived long enough to get to the Warrior.
Sliding off a clap unit she was sitting on Maya spoke next, "Hello my name is Maya," hesitating slightly she continued her voice sharp and scared of rejection, "I'm a siren." To punctuate her point she phaselocked Axton and slammed him into a wall. "That was for groping my ass right before the Hyperion bots attacked. " Gaige was hearing her but still couldn't believe it, Maya had become a living zombie after what happened to her never speaking a word until...
Clenching her fists Gaige vowed to listen and remember Maya before she woke from this cruel dream. Though was this what actually happened?
Covered in snow and fallen clap units Axton groaned out, "Totally worth it!"
Sheathing the partially drawn blade at Maya's display of power Zer0 spoke next, " Stalking through shadows/ I strike unseen and unheard/ I'm number Zer0." A smiley emote appeared briefly before being replaced with a blank mask. Gaige had seen the explosions and despite Zer0's penchant for disappearing acts his luck had finally run out. Pity he didn't get to see the end of Jack but the surprisingly large amount of cash he left her was what funded her cybernetic limb creations so she could actually fight.
Waving his buzz axe Krieg bellowed, "KRIEG! I'M HERE TO SHANK AND SMILE!" Gaige truly wondered if she could dream kill Krieg just for satisfaction. He was the one who was largely responsible for what had happened but even now Maya in her infinite curiosity was tentatively approaching him to talk.
Rolling over Claptrap began speaking loudly and happily, "And now that we all know each other it is ti-" his words were cut off as Krieg hefted Claptrap up and jammed him into the snow, muffling his indignant cries.
Fighting a frown at the manhandled Claptrap, true he could be annoying but once she found the Fragtrap protocol he had been invaluable, Gaige yanked Claptrap out of the snow with her robotic arm. Ignoring the looks thrown her way for releasing the bot Gaige clambered into a bed her faithful friend Deathtrap watching over her. It was an odd dream but still it was nice to see them again. When she woke next it'll probably be in the middle of nowhere or a Hyperion prison.
A series of beeping noises woke her tensing her body Gaige moved instinctively drawing her Twister shotgun, only Deathtrap's clawed hand stopped the barrel from rising up. Covered in a thin sweat Gaige laughed nervously as she put the shotgun away trying to downplay what happened.
Zer0 gave her an appraising stare, the reflexes and gleam in her eyes was something that only veterans of decades or veterans of nonstop combat gained. To see it on a child was worrying and problematic especially if she was a spy. Resolving to keep an eye on her and if the others were trustworthy share his concerns with them.
Gaige was panicking. Her last memory was being burned alive as the moon base blew but now it seemed she was back at the beginning again. If this wasn't a dream then maybe just maybe she can change everything for better. And she thought with a manic grin for her own amusement, sure there was fun last time but now she might be able to keep the fun going the whole time.
Smiling widely Gaige walked to the Hunters only one thought on her mind, 'She was Anarchy incarnate and she was ready to smash the system on a freaking BADASS scale.'
A/N: So idea is that an AU story where everything gets done at a very high cost explosively ends with destruction of moon base. Only instead of dying Gaige is thrown to the beginning of the story with all her memories of what happened and changes things for a better outcome and her own amusement. Might do mini stories with other chapters.
I'm not going to write haikus for Zer0 or bother with Krieg speaking much. Both gave me waaaayyy too much trouble to do for this chapter.
I'd only use Spanish/other languages sparingly but Translation will always be at bottom of chapter.
Translation
Macarra chica; Badass Girl
Chica: Girl.