A/N: Sorry for the delay, but I find it very hard to write Sheldon. I had all this story written, except for the heavy Sheldon parts before I ever considered posting it. Even then, I still didn't post it till the part with Sheldon in World War II was almost done because it took me weeks to write and rewrite that. So I just want to notify my readers that as I get more into Sheldon parts, I might not be able to post every other day.

Chapter 28 - Trying to Understand

Sheldon sat in his spot using his laptop on the internet, trying to find reference to the power module he took off the machine, but with no luck. The power module, on the machine he built, was built for him by Howard and its large size meant this one Sheldon now had was special, but he couldn't find any reference to it. So he closed his eyes and focused on a mental picture of it he had, because of his eidetic memory, and he quickly noticed the nameplate on its side with a NSN number. NSN meant National Stock Number and that was a way the government identified parts. Sheldon now saw the number in his mind and typed it on the computer, and got the information he had been hopelessly trying to find before, the power module was a part for the international space station. He smiled because he actually thought that was good, he didn't know how his predecessor had gotten it, but Leonard would have a very hard time to get a replacement, so Sheldon now had complete control over the machine.

He looked up from the screen to see Amy moving around the kitchen, making soup for him, he couldn't help a smile from forming under his surgical mask, at how thoughtful she was. But she was always that way, even in his timeline before they broke up, always thinking about him, and a warm feeling seemed now to go through his whole body as he realized she would always be with him now. Amy turned suddenly and caught him looking at her, so she gave him a smile, "Soup will be ready soon Sheldon."

"Thank you Amy, it smells good." Sheldon then turned back to his computer screen.

Amy looked back at the soup, her mind going back to her previous thoughts, something seemed wrong. Right now Sheldon seemed normal, and this morning when he fell asleep with her on the couch he seemed normal, but between those times he was definitely acting weird. Like right now, although he seemed okay, he had a cold, and Sheldon being sick really tried her patience to no end, he acted like such a baby, but now he wasn't, weird. Drinking alcohol from the same bottle with Leonard was weird too, along with wanting Leonard to pick him up today, Sheldon always took the car, so he purposely wasn't dependent on Leonard, weird. Then there was this morning after she showered, he liked to rub her baby bump, and usually if she was just in a robe, he would pull her into his lap and slip his hand in to rub her bump, but today he didn't, weird. Amy was confused and she hoped in had something to do with being sick, because if it didn't, it would begin to really worry her.

Sheldon had now changed his subject of interest on the internet and soon found what he wanted, as he read the different reasons men don't want sex during their wives pregnancy. He thought some of them would maybe work with Amy and he noticed that a lot of the problems happened after 20 weeks which was were Amy was now. However as he continued to read all the reasons for his plan to fake a problem, it became a real fear as he read of some of the messy reasons men didn't like it, discharges, possible blood, lactation and other bodily fluids that he could run into. Now Sheldon was actually grossed out, it was one thing to kiss and sleep with Amy, it was another to pass those bodily fluids, he wasn't ready for that.

Sheldon was so engrossed in his research, he didn't even notice Amy coming towards him with his tea and the frown on her face as she realized he was interested in his computer and he was ignoring her. She actually didn't say a word and just went around the back of the couch to see what was so interesting to read that would keep his brilliant mind so occupied. Sheldon was actually working down the list of items that made men not want sex during pregnancy and had just opened the section on men being repulsed by the weight gain and bloating the mother goes through, when Amy started to read over his shoulder.

"SHELDON!" Sheldon almost peed himself, Amy's outburst so startled him. He turned in his seat to see his wife wide eyed staring at him.

"Do you really think I'm fat and disgusting." It wasn't a question, it was a statement, and Amy didn't give him a chance to try and figure out an answer. Tears immediately started to pour down her face, as she quickly put the tea cups on the kitchen counter and practically ran to their bedroom, slamming the door. Sheldon picked up her sobbing, with his excellent hearing, only moments later.

xxxxTIMExxxxTIMExxxxTIMExxxxTIMExxxxTIMExxxxTIMExxxx

Penny and Leonard found the lock, her husband on the DVD told her about, in a box in the safe, it was something neither of them had seen before. They then quietly closed up the office and went to room in the basement to install it on the door knob to the room. The lock was quite unusual and had obviously been specially made for this room and this project specifically because on its surface it had been engraved to contact Dr Leonard Hofstadter for removal. It clamped completely over the door knob and had no key pad or key lock to put a key in, you had to have a special transmitter to lay against it to open it, it couldn't be picked or opened without it. Leonard was amazed his other self had made such a thing and then realized his other self must had planned this for a long time.

With the lock installed they were done at Cal Tech so Leonard and Penny walked to the car, the envelope and DVD in Penny's hands. It was more than extremely awkward, both of them had hardly said a thing to each other since the DVD ended. So sitting in the car for several minutes, doing nothing but just staring ahead, while still in the parking lot, was now the new normal for them the last couple of hours.

Penny out of the clear blue turned to Leonard, "Pinch me."

Leonard looked at her confused. "Huh."

"Please pinch me. This has to be a bad nightmare." Penny pleaded, he would have thought she was kidding, if she didn't look so serious. Leonard complied with her request and pinched her hard. "OW!" Penny rubbed her arm.

"Now you." Leonard put his arm near her. "OW!" He knew she pinched him harder than he did her. However, it did take some of the tension out of the air between them.

"Leonard what is real?" She honestly asked him.

"I don't know. I guess based on what he said…I said, this timeline is the current real timeline." Leonard shrugged.

"Leonard I have been thinking about this since we watched my husband on the DVD. What my husband said that happened and what you told me about your timeline and I realize that life was taken away from me twice. I can't help feeling that I was killed, my memories taken away for these new ones, are you going to do that to me, again?" Her voice started to crack, Leonard knew she was holding back tears.

"I'm sorry Penny, I don't know how to fix that. I understand if you hate me." Was all Leonard could think of.

Penny went silent for a minute, then without looking at him, "I don't blame you Leonard, you were just following Sheldon to keep him from destroying everything, then according to my Husband, Sheldon was the one who blew me up, so if I blame anyone it is Sheldon." She then looked at him again. "But I need to know are you going to kill me again?"

Leonard stared at her a minute, the last thing he would ever want to do was kill her, he would die first himself before he let anything happen to her, but she was right they had killed her twice before. It was like she was almost a Phoenix rising out of the ashes of all the mistakes Sheldon and him made in time travel and he hated himself for being the cause of all her pain. "Penny, I'm sorry. I will do everything possible so that you won't die, either physically or mentally, and this timeline won't change. That is all I can promise."

The drive back to the house was uncomfortably quiet again, between Leonard and Penny as he drove, Leonard and her not saying a word all the way till he parked the car in the garage. "Leonard I have been thinking and I what to know what you are you going to do?" Penny finally asked.

Leonard looked at her like she woke him up from a trance, "I don't understand"

"What are you going to do about what my Husband….or you said, in the DVD, are you going to do something to Sheldon?" Penny now turned in her seat to completely look at him. Penny looked at him a little wide eyed and Leonard was amazed how innocent she looked. "Is there anyway you can fix everything?" She finally asked.

Leonard shook his head, "No. I have been thinking about that too, ever since I arrived in this timeline, there is no way to go back and fix things. First traveling to a time period only gets you in approximately the right place by up to a week or two. So I would have to keep going back over and over to get to the right time after Sheldon arrived back in time the first place, to prevent this from ever happening. That many travels back in time is too high a risk that I would change something again, like he said in the video. Even if I got the right time in the first place, I can't go back because I didn't leave originally till over a month and a half after Sheldon left. So if I went back with Sheldon, I would run into myself, there would be two of us and I can't even imagine what would happen then. So there is no going back for me and we can't trust Sheldon going back himself, not after this, so we have to go together." Then he looked directly at her, "Also Penny you said that you didn't want your memories taken away again, if I went back and changed time, that would happen again."

Penny nodded, "That was also something I was thinking about, what if we could go back to what things were originally." Penny looked away then down at her belly, touching it. "It is just now that I know all this, I wonder." She turned back to him, "So what are you going to do?" Penny cautiously asked, she suddenly thought that maybe she wasn't going to like his answer.

Leonard turned from her and just stared out his window for a minute, "To tell you the truth Sheldon and I are misplaced now, we really don't belong in this timeline at all, present or future, and there is no way to go back, it would probably be better we just ceased to exist."

Penny now looked at him in shock. "What are you saying?"

Leonard looked at her, "Nothing really, just talking out loud, I don't know what to do, it seems we are just screwing up things again and honestly it would be better if we just weren't here and the machine was gone, so time could…..settle down and work normally again."

Penny stared at him, as he sat there not moving, now just looking down at his hands. "Leonard we need to go inside, we can't stay in the garage."

"You go ahead, I just want to sit and think for a little while."

"No, you come into the house, you can think there, I don't want you alone out here." Penny insisted, she then reached over and took the keys from the ignition.

Leonard looked at her with a sad smile on his face, "Don't worry I'm too much a coward to do anything to myself."

"Leonard, I mean it, get in the house now." her voice cracked she was about to cry.

Leonard looked at her seeing her eyes water, he was doing it again getting her upset, that seemed to be the only thing he was good at with her, so he just nodded, "Okay." and opened the car door to follow her inside.