Sorry about the first try at posting this chapter. I only usually Archive of our Own, but most of the people in the fandom use this one, so bare with me, I'm not used to this format.
Okay so this came out a little more angsty than I expected, but I promise it's not too bad. Gotta keep shit light!
Last night was a blur.
I was having a rough day and wanted a drink. 8 beers later, I'm telling Jess about the time I walked in on my parents.
She's such an amazing person. Why does she always end up with the wrong guys? Like Spencer and Ryan and... me. I wish I could had been more for her. I loved her better than anything I ever loved. Richer than any person I ever touched. She was the only thing keeping me going. But I wasn't enough. And I hate myself every day for that.
I feel the harsh LA sun pouring down on my face, and squeezed my eyes in the pain of this hangover.
Just thinking about her, I feel as though she's lying right next to me. And I try not to think about her but it's too late. I think about whenever I would wake up before her on the weekends. I think about wrapping my arms around her soft, still, beautiful body. About feeling her steady, warm breath on my nose. I can feel her. She's right her and I can feel her. She is the red blood that keeps my heart beating. She is the thrill you feel when you find that book you've been searching every bookstore for. She is the sea, calm and majestic, rough and magnificent.
I can smell her. I'm thinking too much. Maybe I'm still a little drunk, because I can feel her rhythmic breath under my body. I've felt it too many times to be mistaken.
I open my eyes one by one and, this can't be right. No. I take a good look around and I'm in Jess' room. I must've passed out. She's probably drinking her Saturday morning tea by now.
I feel a shift under the sheets I have my body wrapped around. It's her. I look down and see a pile of chestnut hair. I slip my arm under the blanket and pull her closer to me, her body petite and radiating warmth. I buried my nose in her hair and inhale her vanilla scent. She shifts her body closer to mine and whispers two faint words. "Morning, Nick.". I know I'm in trouble when I feel my length get harder against her back at the two simple words. She Was so nice to take care of me, and what do I do? Come in here waving my penis everywhere. I begin to back away when she grinds down onto me. What? She's okay with this? She grabs my hand, lacing her fingers through mine, and drags the to her bed shorts. I cup my hand over her clothed crotch and she softly moans. I can feel myself getting harder against her. She grinds back again and I slip my hand under her waistband and down to her slit. I slip a finger in between her lips and feel that she's already wet for me.
Yep.
I'm screwed.