Authors Notes:
Leah: I am so sorry that it took so long to update this. –cries-
For the past few weeks I've been visiting my dad in –summons country accent- Purcellville Virginia! It's the middle of 'effing nowhere!
Although my dad's house is pretty sweet since we have a pool and a mini bar and gigantic backyard with a barn that's bigger than my mom's whole house!
Speaking of the backyard, its nine acres and Jason and I got the wonderful job of painting the entire game fence around the whole perimeter of the yard. I had to wake up at 6:30 everyday at my dad's just to paint a fence! And it took four weeks! It was a big goddamn fence. And Charli and Samantha (my stepsister) just played by the pool and watched us paint. Well, Charli was being nice and she brought us lunch and got us water and stuff. But Jason kept painting my arms 'cause he was being immature and so I painted a giant black stripe down the back of his pants. Then we got in a paint war (this happened several times while painting the fence) and then we had to quit for the day 'cause we couldn't be mature.
So yeah, that being said, I was not at home to help Claire (and Eva I guess but she never does anything for this anymore really) and we had communication difficulties with the different time zones, other fun summer stuff, and lack of motivation so we didn't really work that much. –hides-
Also, I went to New York and saw Avenue Q with my stepmom and it was awesome and highly disturbing. Why do so many things with puppet have a sex scene or heavy mentions of it? Why?! It was funny though.
And there's an M&M store! A two story store in New York City devoted to M&M's, it was so awesome!
I've talked too much so here's Claire (or Eva whichever comes first)
Claire: ………Hello………Umm….I think I'm gonna say my stuff at the end so everyone has time to get over how much they hate me…-grins nervously and ducks behind couch-
Eva: -hides- Erm…………..hi………… -wince- -gets boot thrown at me- I deserved that. A lot. I've been insanely useless with this story because I lack motivation and it's more of a chore to write this than anything. And seeing as it is even more difficult than usual to be funny with this story when I don't feel like writing it at all…I have done nothing. TT
BUT! BUT BUT BUT! The next chapter has stuff that I am skilled at writing and almost always motivated for.
PERVYNESS.
OH yes. Pervyness and pairingness and everything in between. XD FTW!
I also just got back from river rafting. That was so freaking awesome. If you ever get a chance to go, take it. But I know that a lot of people don't like long author's notes so I shut up now. Possibly more at end. Possibly.
Chapter 12:
Despite the fact that Eva had been very tired when she first came to the hideout, she woke up only five hours after she had gone to sleep, feeling surprisingly rested. She sat up and rubbed her eyes, the thick gray blanket she had been sleeping under sliding off her on to the floor. A section was still anchored to the couch by her feet, which she pulled out from under it since she realized they were getting hot.
Eva stretched and tugged the blanket back on to the couch, raising an eyebrow at the slight cloud of dust it raised. She looked at the couch perpendicular to hers, where Claire was still asleep, and looking a bit like a corpse with her face squashed against the pillow and her arm dangling only an inch or two off the floor. Claire grumbled and frowned unhappily in her sleep as the dust settled again, and Eva wondered briefly if her friend had some sort of sixth sense when it came to dirt.
When she had swung her feet off the cushions to rest on the floor, Eva stared at the opposite wall, wondering what she should do now. She really was confused as to why she wasn't tired, but she knew everyone else was still asleep, worn out from the events of yesterday. And even though the various Akatsuki members had woken her up numerous times in less than polite ways when they had been staying at her house, she didn't feel motivated to do the same to them, even though she was so terribly bored. No matter how tempting the idea of tackling Kisame while he was asleep sounded.
…That would also probably get her severely injured if not killed though…so it was a good thing she didn't feel like doing it.
She started thinking about what she usually did when she was bored, sighing when she realized she would usually watch anime or read fanfictions on the computer.
But! she remembered suddenly, perking up. Those fanfictions I read usually contain porn. And I bought Jiraiya's books in Konoha! And they also contain porn!
Eva chuckled quietly to herself as she got up and crept over to her bag. Trying very hard to be silent (because she knew if she woke Claire up, she would be cussed out and punched), she opened the bag and carefully removed its contents one by one as she searched for her porn.
As the floor around her was slowly obstructed from view by her iPod, her other clothes, her make-up, and the other things she carried around, Eva started to feel panicky. She took the objects out more frantically until the bag was horrifyingly empty. Then she remembered Suigetsu hadn't given her back her perverted books before they left. Eva pouted at the empty bag in frustration. Bastard.
Halfheartedly, Eva started to stuff things back into her backpack, staring at her hands without really seeing them. Until a picture on one of her non-porn books caught her eye. It was one of her sword books that had all the different forms she had already learned. Hope restored, she stood up again, trying to remember where she had put her sword down last night. Maybe she could find a way outside or some empty room to practice—
Eva froze halfway through stepping over her bag to search further. Fucking Konoha ANBU had taken her sword after she'd managed to procure it from Suigetsu. She kicked the bag and the few items she had re-packed rolled and flopped and flipped back onto the floor. Claire made an irritated noise from behind her, and turned, apprehensive, to see if she was being glared at. Thankfully she wasn't, though she figured Claire was probably awake now anyway and just trying to fall asleep again, too tired to chew Eva out. A couple years ago Claire had been in a guilt-inducing mood and had told her and Leah that this happened often, and that she just pretended to be sleeping, hoping whoever it was would shut the hell up and if she didn't move, maybe she would be able to slip back into unconsciousness.
So Eva picked up her iPod and tiptoed out of the vicinity of the couches, glumly putting in her earphones and turning down the volume as she did so. She hated listening to music at less than full volume but she didn't have much other choice. And lacking porn and swords (and not being in a masochistic mood), she had nothing else to distract her.
She decided since she had nothing better to do, she would map out the interior of the hideout. It was a very odd place to be. It wasn't like a home—there was no carpeting or paint; it really was the inside of a cliff, so all three dimensions of the barriers of the rooms were rough, rocky walls.
But it wasn't strictly a man-made cave either. Adjacent to the couches, which served as a living area, there was a modestly furnished kitchen. There wasn't a fridge, but there was a large box made of made of some unknown substance that held dry ice and whatever sparse food items needed to be chilled. Other than that, there were cabinets and counters that held the goods that would not spoil, and an old-fashioned stove that could cook things if a fire was lit underneath. It vaguely reminded Eva of pilgrims, an analogy that she normally wouldn't make in association with nine highly dangerous murderers, but was true nonetheless. She half expected to see a butter churner.
Following the trend set by the anomaly of a kitchen in a cave, there were about a dozen doors along the back and sidewalls of the place. Eva spent a moment wondering how they had carved out the rooms of this place, and what they had done with all the rock that used to be here. Some of it probably had to do with one jutsu or another, but she figured a bit of it had to have been manual labor. Jutsu's weren't exactly like magic or anything, and they had to have limits. In any case, it had to be a lot of work, and she knew the Akatsuki had multiple hideouts. There was no way they would have been able or willing to do this for all of them.
There was also the mystery of where they had gotten all the furniture. Even if they were criminals, it wasn't like they could make a huge living off it. Stealing it could have been an option, but a rather difficult and obvious one unless they took it from a civilian city place, but then it wouldn't be that durable.
Eva sighed, not wanting to dwell on these very confusing topics for much longer. Instead, she returned her focus to the doors. She knew one was the bathroom, though how they managed the plumbing for that was also a mystery, and on top of that one she would pay to not know about. And even though she wouldn't have thought it practical for each of the Akatsuki members to have their own room, this appeared to be the case. There was another door leading to the extra room that Leah was in, since Claire and Eva had insisted she sleep in there after all the excess chewgtt-trauma she had endured.
That left one more door. Cautiously, Eva walked over to it. She hadn't been expressly forbid to look inside it, or any parts of the hideout for that matter. Yet she still felt a little like she was breaking some rule by going through it.
But she was really REALLY bored.
And they all messed with her stuff all the time.
And even if they did have a problem with it, they wouldn't know, 'cause she'd just put it back. So there.
She opened the door, incredibly thankful that the hinges weren't squeaking. On top of Claire getting mad at her for waking her up, and in spite of whatever she told herself, she didn't want to be caught and have to explain or anything.
Turned out that the door led to a closet. Eva stared into its dark, cluttered depths for a few minutes before daring to touch anything. Half of the closet had shelves on which sheets, towels, and other normal things lay, even though they were stuffed inside haphazardly. A broom was also sandwiched into the little space between the doorframe and the edges of the shelves. However, Eva could see little beyond the handle as the bristles sank into the mountains of junk that loomed like a waiting avalanche at her feet.
She stared down into the dark abyss, half-expecting it to suddenly jump up and attack her, like a Transformer robot. It didn't, but as her eyes were still glued to the jumbled mess, she could identify some distinct items even in the poor light. A dead bonsai tree, a fish tank, a tin of assorted buttons, an old teddy bear that looked like it had been devoured by a lion (or, perhaps…a shark?) and then thrown back up, a small sewing kit, wood polish, a black bag, a paintbrush, a small paper fan, a sock puppet, a bent pair of glasses, and—
A small patch of pink, a little brighter than the muted colors around the rest of the stuff in the closet, caught Eva's eye. Carefully, she knelt down and gingerly poked it, hoping it wasn't alive. When she discovered it wasn't, she tried to work it out from under the rest of the stuff without causing it to crash down on her. Miraculously, she managed to get it out of the myriad of junk.
Where there wasn't pink fuzz, there was metal. Apparently some of it was more versatile than the rest, because the object had gotten tangled in itself. Carefully twisting it out apart, she ran her finger over the touch pad on her iPod so it would shine a dim light in which she could identify the object.
Eva stared at the thing dangling from her fingers long after the glow from the iPod stopped illuminating it. Because now, the image of what she had found was more brightly lit in her mind than anything else. As disturbing as she was, she never would have thought that while snooping through the notorious Akatsuki's hideout, she would find…
Fuzzy pink handcuffs.
The realization that had been accumulating suddenly hit her, full force, and she violently slapped a hand over her mouth to keep from howling with laughter. Her eyes watered, though more from the effort of not making a sound than her tongue being bitten by her teeth in the attempt to distract her laugh box with pain.
With great effort, Eva slid the riotous object back into the confines of the closet and closed the door. After accomplishing this she allowed herself to lower her head onto her knees while the hysteria subsided. Thankfully, it had not yet occurred to her to wonder who the handcuffs belonged to, else she would wake not only everyone in the hideout but the village of Konoha with the laughter that would come while imagining each possible owner.
She waited a long time before sitting back up, still occasionally struck with an aftermath of small giggles. Her back started to ache though, from her lack of movement, so she righted herself and stared at the ceiling instead, amused. A few seconds later, the door to Eva's left opened, and she snapped her head to the source of the noise instinctively.
Eva was stunned by the sudden presence of another conscious being, but Hidan was stunned by the identity of the person in front of him (no less the strange location—on the floor in the middle of the hall).
Both parties struggled to make sense of the situation while frozen, eyes glued to each other, when their minds simultaneously clicked and sent for reaction.
"HOLY SHIT IT'S YOU!" Hidan yelled as Eva fell over, though she hadn't noticed how she had automatically leaned halfway to the floor when Hidan had first appeared.
A third person was also affected by this meeting, because a half-second later there was a "WAH!" and an extremely loud thump from the direction of the couches.
Following this racket, eight other doors shot open and the other Akatsuki members emerged.
"Dammit Hidan, what the hell is your problem?!"
"Is everyone all right? Tobi heard loud noises!"
"I knew something like this would happen."
"Gee, well you could have told us and saved us the trouble Zetsu."
"Wait, what the hell is Eva doing here, un?!"
"You just noticed me?"
"They got back last night, but you were too tired from cleaning to stay awake, remember?"
"They?! Does that mean Leah's here too?!"
Deidara dashed off to the extra room before Konan could answer him, leaving her to shake her head knowingly while the others yelled at Hidan for waking them up.
Eva got up and edged away from the angry group, not wanting to be caught in the crossfire that she had inadvertently caused. As she backed away, she accidentally bumped into the couch, closer now than it had been previously because Claire had kicked it when she jerked awake and fell to the floor.
"Oh fuck, are you okay, Claire?" Eva asked, craning her neck over the piece of furniture where Claire still had not moved from the floor.
"Ow…" Claire groaned in response. "Floor is made of rocks…ow…ow…"
Eva giggled.
From the middle of the argument still taking place behind Eva, Hidan finally shut the group up by noticing her and pointing. "It's her fault, she fucking surprised me!"
Nine heads turned to look at Eva, who scowled.
"And what are you doing anyway…"
"It's your fault for yelling! And being surprised by a non-ninja! And you made Claire fall off the couch!" Eva retorted.
Hidan blinked. "The bitch is here?" He nearly sprinted around the couch, ignoring the angry looks he was getting from the rest of the Akatsuki.
"Ow," Claire said again, irritably this time.
"Why're ya sleeping bitch?" Hidan grinned sadistically, nudging Claire in the side with his toe.
"OW!" Claire twisted sharply away and countered by punching Hidan in the shin.
"FUCK!" he yelped, holding the injury while hopping on his right leg. "THE HELL WAS THAT?!"
"WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM! I JUST FELL ON THE GODDAMN FLOOR MADE OF ROCKS BECAUSE YOU YELLED! IT'S LIKE SIX IN THE MORNING AND SOME PEOPLE HAD A REALLY STRENUOUS DAY YESTERDAY, AND COULD HAVE USED THE SLEEP!"
"YOU THINK YOU HAD A STRENUOUS DAY? WHAT ABOUT THE REST OF US WHO SPENT ALL THIS TIME TRYING TO FIND YOU THREE BITCHES, ALL BECAUSE YOU HAD TO GET YOUR DAMN SELVES KIDNAPPED IN THE FIRST PLACE!"
Pein sighed as the hostility from the Akatsuki vs. Hidan argument was transferred to Hidan vs. Claire. "Is it wrong that I consider this normal?" he mumbled to Konan as he wearily massaged his temples.
"WAAAAAH! RAPIST!"
"DAMMIT LEAH, I'M NOT A RAPIST, UN! Ow! HEY, STOP IT—OW! JESUS LEAH, IT'S ME, DEIDARA!"
The sounds of violence carried over from Leah's room, subsiding after a few more insistent protests from Deidara.
"Geez, I was just gonna see if you were okay—"
"And you couldn't wait until everyone was awake?!" Leah huffed, exasperated. The door opened and she pushed Deidara out.
"Everyone is awake!" the blonde protested, gesturing to the group collected in front of the closet, and Claire and Hidan, who hadn't heard the ruckus being made by Deidara and Leah due to their own shouts. "I don't understand how even you could sleep through that," he muttered once she had stopped punching him in the back.
"I also consider this normal," Pein admitted grudgingly.
xXx
Last night:
"You're going to have to get used to it little lady. There's going to be twenty of us here, and we aren't leaving until the Akatsuki come back."
Charli's objective had been to reveal that number. Having it accomplished, she flicked open a panel on the headset she held behind her back, and pressed a small red button. The connection was severed. All six earpieces beeped twice, and silence filled the room.
"Hey…" Eva said softly after a minute of silence, "It's after midnight."
"What's your point Eva?" Claire shot at her numbly.
"It's Christmas."
Leah shot her a look. "My sister had just been practically kidnapped, Eva—"
"I know that, I'm worried too! I just—" Eva cut herself off, for once realizing what she was going to say before she said it. She still hadn't realized it soon enough though, since the scene had been set by her last words.
"You what?" Leah prodded tersely.
Eva stared at her feet somberly while adding yet another mental note to the many that were tacked up on the corkboard in her head to stop being such an idiot. "I was just pointing out that this really sucks…" she mumbled.
Claire scoffed and rolled her eyes up at the ceiling bitterly. "Yeah, we really needed you to point that out to us."
"I know that, already, but Leah—"
"All three of you, shut up!" Pein commanded loudly, his strange ringed eyes coercing them into silence. "I understand you're upset, but there is nothing we can do right now!"
"What do you think we should do then?" Claire muttered bitterly. So many frustrating, depressing, stupid things had happened to them in the last few days and they were still just piling up.
"Nothing." He glanced around the room of solemn faces, his own stern with the aura of command. "We all need rest. So we should get it. Nothing positive will be accomplished by rushing into things unprepared."
Awkwardly, the Akatsuki members murmured small phrases of assent and drifted towards their rooms. Konan and Pein stayed with the girls to sort out the sleeping arrangements.
"We have one extra room, but the bed is small so you probably won't be able to share," Konan explained, fidgeting slightly with her hands. "Two of you could sleep on the couches."
"I'll take the couch, one of you guys can have the room," Leah said quietly.
"No. You take the room."
"But—"
"Dammit Leah, just don't argue for once," Claire sighed, frustrated.
"You had to deal with Chewgtt for longer than we did…Plus, I like the couch," Eva added.
"Me too," Claire agreed, "So just…chill…"
Pein and Konan glanced at each other. Leah fidgeted, wanting to protest further, but nodded for all their sakes.
Konan nodded too, perhaps without noticing. "Okay. Well, Leah, I'll show you the room and get some blankets for you two."
Pein, who had apparently stayed only to make sure there were no quarrels over room arrangements, paused after taking a step towards his own. "Like I said…don't dwell on this too much. It won't do anyone any good."
Though he had added the last part to distance himself from them, conveying his superiority and such, they had not missed the slight awkwardness he had started with. The four of them smiled a little at the unusual gesture of concern, a small solace amongst the recently unhappy times.
XxX
Everyone was secretly thinking that the sinister blonde haired, blue eyed, eleven-year-old bitch's luck would eventually run out. However, no one said it because the laws of the universe would demand otherwise if this wish were to be put verbally. It had been a miracle in itself that she survived messing with the Akatsuki and an undercover mission to Konoha, but now she was really screwed.
Before there had always been someone looking out for her and making sure that she didn't get violently murdered. When Leah had to baby-sit her for the two days during the summer the only reason she didn't get hurt was because of some deal they made with the Akatsuki and the fact that they had been too distracted about their crisis back then to give two shits about what she was doing. And if it hadn't been for Konan, she would've been kidnapped and held hostage in Konoha. She had been very lucky. Very lucky.
But now she wasn't.
She was completely screwed, and she knew it.
There was nothing she could do about it.
She hadn't slept in twenty six hours.
And it was fucking Christmas!
The rest of the team from Konoha had arrived in the early hours of the morning, making a mess as a result of the justu before rummaging through the contents of the house. Although, they did put everything back after tearing through it, making things slightly less awful. At least she wouldn't have to clean up afterwards on top of everything else. That would be really un-cool.
Charli blew the annoying wispy hairs out of her face and pouted like a kindergartener that couldn't go out to recess. She was told not to move, and trying to disobey this rule proved unsuccessful. She was immediately snatched up by whatever ninja was closest and placed on the couch, with the threat of being tied up to look forward to if she moved again.
She decided just to stay put and glare at everyone until they felt uncomfortable. Although her glare wasn't close to being as potent as Itachi's, she was okay at imitating it. The secret was to narrow the eyes and lower the eyebrows slightly while keeping an emotionless face and staring down whoever the victim was. Though a smile always crept up her face so it sort of ruined the effect. Unless it was seen as an evil smile. Which it wasn't.
The ninja had gathered in the kitchen, their voices carrying over to where Charli sat reluctantly on the black leather couch. She could see them if she just barely turned her head, and she could also hear them quite clearly. But they all knew this, and didn't care one bit, because there was absolutely nothing she could do at present.
Impatiently, she waited for an opportunity in which she could safely contact the Akatsuki and give them a heads up on who was at the house. She scanned the faces in the group for the seventh time that hour and mentally named everyone that she could recognize: Kakashi, Jiraiya, Gai, Gaara, Kankuro, Temari, Neji, TenTen, Lee, Kiba, Shino, Hinata, Ino, Shikamaru, and Chouji. The other five were ANBU members, so she couldn't see their faces and wouldn't know their names, but it didn't matter because she still knew they posed a threat.
There was no way in hell that the Akatsuki would return to the house while these people occupied it. They were criminals, but they weren't stupid. She knew that they were extremely intelligent, especially Pein. She couldn't even remember how many books she had read and how many websites she had gone to so she could talk to the heavily pierced man about strategies and such.
Maybe she could still help a little bit, if she could help figure out how to get the Konoha and Suna bitches out of the house. No doubt Pein was already working on a plan, but she hated feeling useless. She knew they noticed when she turned her head, so she tried to use her peripherals to get another glance at them.
The team of ninja seemed to be engrossed in conversation at the moment, just like the last time she had checked. Now would be as good a time as any to get send a message…
"What do you think you're doing?" A pair of pale hands grabbed her wrists before she could even attempt to send a text message to the Akatsuki's shared cell phone. She started then tried to reinstate her glare.
He kneeled now so he was at her eye level, his creepy pupil-less lavender eyes meeting her pale blue ones. "Don't even think about trying to contact them. It's no use." He informed her for the second time that day. She had tried to call them earlier, but that attempt failed more epically than this one.
"You guys are the ones who left the cell phone within arms reach from me. You should've known that I would've at least tried to get some help, since there are twenty weirdoes practically kidnapping me in my own house," Charli said in her best patronizing tone.
Neji grabbed the phone and put it in his bag. "Do you have any other advice for us?"
Charli tapped her chin in mock thought. "Yeah, get out!" she said brightly.
"No can do little lady," Kankuro smiled. "We're staying here until we can say 'hello' to your little blonde friend," he added darkly.
"Eva?" Charli questioned. Then again, Eva wasn't really her friend. They just tolerated each other's existence and occasionally talked about what would be the worst way to die.
"No, the other one," Kankuro narrowed his eyes at her. He knew she was messing with him, and her little act of playing dumb wasn't going to work.
There was another blonde one? Charli didn't know she had another 'friend' that was blo—oh! Deidara, right, of course he was talking about Deidara. He probably didn't even know Eva. Or maybe he did and he either really liked her or she had done something that severely pissed him off. Knowing Eva, it was one of those extremes but it was more likely the latter. Anyways, it was pretty obvious he'd want to kick the crap out of Deidara, after all he had kidnapped and killed his brother. But Gaara still lived so it was as bad. Right?
"I don't have any other blonde friends though," Charli maintained innocently.
"Give it up kid, we know you know the Akatsuki," Temari snapped.
Charli dropped her head into her hands. "For the last time you idiots! I don't know any Alaskans! Alaskans don't like southern California, its too hot for them," she explained with fake exasperation.
The next thing she saw was something vividly green standing beside Neji, who was still positioned in front of her. Lee crouched down her level looking at her in the eyes as he smiled softly at her. "What's you're name?"
That was a first. They had all been calling her 'girl', 'kid', 'little lady', 'hey you'…and Kakashi kept calling her 'Kami'. She straightened up warily and told him her name.
Lee nodded; apparently he had some different way of extracting information. "Charli-chan, we know that you know who we're talking about when we say 'Akatsuki'. You were caught spying in our beloved Konoha with another presumed Akatsuki member and there's clear evidence that they have been here. Why won't you tell us that you at least know who they are?"
Charli stared at him as he smiled while he awaited an answer from her. She sighed. Lee was cool, being an eccentric weirdo and stuff, but that didn't mean she was going to humor him or any of his buddies. "I. Don't. Know. Any. Alaskans. End of story."
Lee's face fell in disappointment since his nice way of questioning didn't work.
"Good try Lee!" Gai praised.
Lee beamed at Gai, tears brimming at the corners of his eyes from being praised by his adored and equally green sensei.
Everyone else practically gagged. Neji pinched the bridge of his nose and shook his head, wondering why and thanking God that he wasn't affected by their weirdness. Especially because now they were hugging for some reason only people wearing those ridiculous green jumpsuits could understand.
"Right," Charli drawled. "That's not weird at all," she added sarcastically before continuing to stare at the other ninjas.
The house shook suddenly from the force of the large slab of wood that was slammed unnecessarily hard against the wall (which was saved from pulverization only by the doorstop).
"I NEED TO TAKE A SHIT!" The crazy blonde doctor announced. They heard his footsteps running to the bathroom on the other side of the house then another loud slam of a door.
"That's not weird either," Neji commented dryly.
Charli shifted her ever-present glare on to him. "…Touché." After all, Jason's antics confused everyone, and they all seemed to feel the need to point out just how weird he was to her and Leah. They knew he was weird; he had always been weird and he had always shared things about his bowel movements with anything within earshot, be it animal, vegetable, or mineral. That was just the way he was.
"…What just happened?" Shikamaru scratched the back of his head and blinked, eyes turned towards the source of the noise.
Charli grimaced. "My brother's home." If things hadn't been bad before, they were now. She had to come up with some way to explain to Jason why there were twenty random strangers in his house on Christmas. Fortunately he hadn't noticed them yet so she had a little time to think up a plan before Jason finished, as he so elegantly put it, 'taking a shit'.
Maybe she could tell him they were all hobos that needed a place to stay on Christmas, and since one was suppose to be nice and charitable on this holiday she agreed to let them stay a few days? No, that wouldn't work, Jason could see past her sweet and innocent act to the little demon within. Besides, twenty hobos wouldn't be hanging out in this part of the La Jolla, considering it was a fairly wealthy and secluded neighborhood.
A traveling circus whose hotel reservations got canceled? No, if he actually believed that, he would give them hell asking them to do funny tricks and such. A group of carolers that would stay with them for the Twelve Days of Christmas because they were particularly persistent with making people listen to their religious songs and teachings? No, she was a proud Atheist and Jason knew it. They were all her friends? Jason knew she didn't have that many friends. The house was haunted so she hired a ghost hunting team? Again no, she didn't believe in such things. Maybe they were—
"Ah, that was the nicest crap I've ever taken," Jason said after he finished his business in the bathroom.
Not good. He would undoubtedly be in the living room in the next few seconds. Dammit, she needed more time. "That's nice Jason," she drawled after a moment's hesitation, trying to sound disinterested and at ease.
The ninja in the room seemed to be slightly disturbed, except for a few that found Jason's crude humor to be funny. They tried to turn away as he approached so he wouldn't see they had been laughing at him (although that was generally his goal).
"Yeah I know—wait…who are these people?" Jason stopped in his tracks when he came to the archway that led to the living room, eyes the size of walnuts at the number of strangely dressed people he saw.
"Umm," Charli glanced at them quickly then back at Jason.
"They are not the dudes-and-one-chick group… where'd they go? Did they find the girls or something? Maybe I should call them and at least wish them a happy Christmas," Jason rambled. His face brightened up spontaneously and replaced the look of shock. "Oh yeah, Charli! Mewwy Kwissmas!" He exclaimed using a baby voice and throwing his arms up in the air with enthusiasm.
"Heh…Merry Christmas," Charli returned uneasily.
"But seriously, who are these people?" Jason made wild arm movements at said people, who were probably just as confused by him as he was by them.
"Er…They're rivals of those other people…a rival biker gang," she fibbed. "Don't tell them anything, they're violent—," Charli added as quickly as she could before TenTen clasped a hand over her mouth.
Jason narrowed his eyes at them. "Why are they in my house?"
Kakashi stepped forward. "You see, the people who have been frequenting this place are not good people and we want to bring them to justice," he explained calmly.
Jason chuckled and shook his head. "Dude, you got the wrong guys."
"Pardon me?"
"The dudes-and-one-chick are cool. Sure they're a little eccentric…okay, extremely eccentric, but I don't believe they're bad people. Lighten up man, don't hate on the outcasts," Jason headed into the kitchen and opened the fridge. "Since it's Christmas, I'll let you stay here until they get back, which will probably be soon. You can take things up with them then. In the meanwhile don't destroy the house or I'll call the police or something."
Charli gaped at him. Was he seriously just going to allow them to stay here? No further questions? No nothing? Dammit, not even Jason was going to help her this time.
Ass.
xXx
Things had quieted down since the initial waking up of all the occupants of the hideout. The girls were lurking in the kitchen area, Claire and Leah helping Eva cook breakfast.
Konan had offered to have some of the guys help (to which they all immediately protested…loudly), but Eva turned her down. Claire sniffed that they should clean up the place, since it was still coated thickly in dirt, and although she hadn't exactly been serious, Konan took her up on the suggestion. There were more protests, save from Deidara and Hidan, who just looked appalled and disbelieving. Pein silenced them and forced them all to comply with one menacing stare. He and Konan now sat at the table smugly, discussing unknown matters quietly.
The girls were mostly quiet as they cooked. Despite assurances, they had receded glumly to thinking about the situation at their house. It was frustrating to be targeted simply for knowing the Akatsuki. They understood why Konoha had this vendetta against them, but…
"You three."
"AH!" Claire jumped, the cup of water she had been holding splashing herself, Eva, and Leah in the face. She spun around, clutching the counter with one hand and pointing at Pein with the other. "NINJA SKILLS! SO ANNOYING!"
"I am wet," Leah said.
Eva wiped a drop of water off her cheek. "Me too."
"Not my fault," Claire grumbled.
Pein cleared his throat. "Erm…I apologize," he said awkwardly. "I had something I wished to discuss with you."
The three of them looked slightly confused but waited for him to continue while drying themselves off with their sleeves.
He sighed, looking mildly conflicted. "I know this may be difficult…But I need to know if you told Konoha or Sasuke anything about us."
"Are you serious…?" Eva asked doubtfully.
Claire narrowed her eyes, throwing a hand out in a questioning, incredulous gesture. "What the hell man? As if we haven't been interrogated enough in the last few days!"
"We didn't tell them anything, we just made stuff up when we had to," Leah complied evenly.
Pein's gaze lingered on her for a moment, then moved on to the other two after deciding she was telling the truth. "You two still have not answered my question."
"No!" Eva squeaked defensively.
Claire crossed her arms. "Of course we didn't tell them anything. Just because we hate you guys sometimes for being idiots doesn't mean we'd just sell you out…Geez…"
"I was just checking," he explained stiffly.
"Nice to know that we're trusted."
The tension was abruptly interrupted when Tobi bounced up between Pein and the girls. "Hi!" he peeped innocently.
Claire flinched back again at his sudden appearance, but managed to suppress a yelp this time.
Pein quickly took advantage of this change in subject. "What is it, Tobi?"
"Um, actually Tobi was just wondering if breakfast was almost ready," he said, turning his orange-masked face towards the girls tentatively.
"A little while longer Tobi," Leah told him. "Tobi is a good boy. He deserves his Christmas presents." She hinted, mentally adding an 'Unlike some people' to the statement.
"Ooh! Christmas presents, yay!" Tobi clapped his hands excitedly.
Eva smirked, remembering her little adventure this morning and choosing to interpret it with her mind firmly in the gutter. "Heh heh…Maybe we didn't do as good a job at picking presents as we thought," she chuckled darkly. The four of them stared at her quizzically.
She motioned for Claire and Leah to come closer so she could whisper something to them, eyeing the two curious Akatsuki members warily. The three of them edged down along the counter a little, and Eva told them…
"Fuzzy pink handcuffs?" Tobi repeated a little louder than he meant to.
Everyone froze. Konan coughed on the tea she had been drinking. Kisame dropped a heavy box he had been carrying on Kakuzu's head. Deidara forgot about keeping his balance as he tried to clean off one of the lights hanging from the ceiling, and nearly fell off. Itachi raised his eyebrows.
Tobi realized too late what he had done, and clapped his hands over his mask where his mouth would have been. "Tobi is sorry! Tobi didn't mean to listen, it's just a habit!"
"What the fuck?! Whose are they?" Hidan exclaimed, looking around at his comrades.
The accusations started flowing immediately. It was always the quiet ones who were the freakiest, so they had to be Itachi's. No, following that logic, they could also be Zetsu's. What about Deidara? He was openly perverted. But Hidan was obviously an S&M freak. But all the chicks Kisame got were probably into beastiality, so they were kinky enough already. Who said anything about kinkiness? They were probably Kakuzu's. He had to put them on or they'd run away.
That last comment earned Hidan a particularly violent punch in the ribs from Kakuzu, and judging from the loud cracking noises that came from the impact, several were probably broken.
Itachi and Zetsu hadn't been insulted much by the allegations against themselves, having more patience than the others; they kept their peaceful, stationary positions and held their silence (characteristically, as it had been pointed out). But Deidara and Kisame looked like they were about ready to beat each other up. Hidan had wiped the blood from his mouth and stood up, wincing yet grinning at the pain in his side, and was planning on returning Kakuzu's favor.
Most of them winced when a shrill and ridiculously loud whistle cut through the air and echoed around the rocky enclosure. Konan calmly lowered her hand and nodded very slightly to Pein.
"Holy shit, she can do the cool finger whistle thing!" Claire spazzed quietly to Eva and Leah. "I've always wanted to be able to do that!"
"Me too…" Eva agreed wistfully.
Leah looked at the floor unhappily. "I can't even whistle normally…"
Tobi patted her on the shoulder. "Don't worry Leah-san, Tobi can't whistle either."
"Yay, friend!" she said, hugging him.
"Um…" Konan interrupted. She was still blushing a little from the compliments she had received in regards to her whistling.
The squabbling Akatsuki members returned their attention to her, then Pein.
"Don't start," he ordered severely. Damn, they were like children the way they constantly had to be chastised and watched. He glanced in the direction of the stove, where Leah, Claire, and Eva had quietly resumed cooking breakfast.
Of course, it was those three who often stirred up all this ludicrousness. He sighed and went back to the table.
The Akatsuki members resumed working with surprisingly little fuss. But this was really because they were secretly thinking of who was the true owner of the fuzzy pink handcuffs. They picked up their dusters, brooms, and the like. Hidan placed his hands on his side and realigned his ribs with more disturbing crunching sounds. Tobi looked to the girls and waved, practically skipping back to the larger room.
"I told you to be wary of the ninja skills," Claire whispered, mostly to Eva. "Evil ninja skills…super hearing and stuff."
"I heard that," Pein called over his shoulder.
"I know!" Claire yelled back.
"Didn't know he could be funny…" Leah muttered. They giggled and Konan smiled a little before picking up her conversation with Pein, ending their eavesdropping bout.
"So whose do you think they are?" Eva spoke the question that was on everyone's mind.
"Funnyboy," Claire snickered in the quietest voice she could manage. Just in case. "He's the only one who might have use for them, after all."
"Deidara could have a use for them," Eva said thoughtfully.
Leah gaped at her and took a couple steps away from her horribly candid friend.
"I will pretend you did not mean that the way you meant that…"
"No, I think they're Itachi's."
"Why?" Leah asked, hoping for validation against Eva's other preference.
She shrugged. "Well he is quiet. And disturbed…with the whole clan killing thing…He seems like the type." With that explanation, she scooped the last pancake from the pan she was cooking it in onto the large serving plate and carried it to the table. Claire and Leah followed reluctantly, each carrying the stacks of individual plates and the utensils.
The others flocked to the food, helping themselves eagerly, though they were all still sending each other curious glances.
Though they were not at the house, everyone still took the seats they normally occupied out of habit, since the table was of a similar shape. Hidan, however, lingered next several dozen feet away from his chair. He looked from the pancakes to Claire, and backed away a little.
"Tobi, switch with me," he demanded.
Tobi froze. "Wh-what?"
"Fucking switch with me!"
"Damn Hidan, don't be such a drama queen, just sit down, un," Deidara muttered exasperatedly.
"'Drama queen'? Well if that isn't the pot calling the kettle black," Hidan snorted. "Stay the hell out of this. Tobi, move."
"Um…okay…" Tobi hesitantly got up from his chair and went to sit between Konan and Itachi.
Hidan smirked triumphantly and took Tobi's place.
"What the hell was that about?" Kakuzu shot at him, more irritated with the interruption of the status quo than genuinely curious.
"Bitch," he replied simply, stuffing a whole pancake into his mouth.
Kakuzu raised an eyebrow, though the action was barely noticed due to his extensive facial coverings. "I know you hate me, and the feeling is mutual, but I don't exactly know how I merited that response," he remarked conversationally.
Hidan rolled his eyes. "Sorry I hurt your feelings," he said, not sounding sorry at all. "I meant Bitch. As in that." He twitched his hand in Claire's direction.
Claire glowered at him.
He put down his fork in response and returned the angry stare. "Do you know how long it took me to get the syrup out of my hair the last time that hyperactive twit—" at this he pointed to Eva, who pouted at him fiercely, "—decided to make pancakes?"
Claire let out a short, dry laugh. "So that's what the big deal is?" she shook her head, scoffing. "That's really sad. I didn't know I given you pancake-induced mental trauma." She chewed pensively at a bite of said breakfast food. "I already told you I'm over it now anyway."
"Like I'm gonna trust anything you say. That's why I put two people between you and me. No way you're getting past Deidara's big ol' airhead. Or Zetsu's…plant…head…"
"Hell, I'll throw a pancake at you if you don't shut up, un."
"Zetsu, eat any pancake projectiles that come my way." He thought for a moment. "No, better yet, eat the person who throws it."
"I don't see why I should help you," Zetsu pointed out calmly, poking at a small plant he had brought to the table. After all, pancakes weren't exactly part of his food pyramid. "Especially when I could just dispose of the target and solve everyone's problems."
"Get over yourself Hidan, you aren't so important to me that I spend every moment trying to figure out if you're susceptible to death by bacon," Claire sapped impatiently.
"I'm not susceptible to death by anything, whore. I'm just saying, you fuck up my hair again—"
"Can we please change the subject? I am so tired of listening to your pathetic squabbling all the time," Pein moaned impatiently.
"Whose handcuffs are they?" Eva piped up.
Pein grabbed his own face roughly, perhaps trying to implode his own skull in an attempt to end his suffering.
"What? Everyone wants to know," Eva justified innocently.
"I don't," Leah volunteered unhappily.
"Yes you do," Claire contradicted her.
Leah hung her head. "Okay, yeah, I do…" she admitted. "Doesn't mean I'm not afraid of the answer," she muttered much more quietly to herself.
Kisame pushed his plate out of his way and crossed his large blue arms over the table, leaning ever so slightly towards Pein. "Do you know whose they are?"
Pein eyed him, his brow down over his face in uncomfortable irritation. The shark man was purposefully being creepy and crowding over him, trying to extract an answer just by dwarfing the Akatsuki leader.
"You're in my personal space," Pein grunted.
"You avoided the question," Kisame pointed out.
"It's true," Eva agreed.
"Thank you."
"You're welcome."
Claire and Leah were both very tempted to start banging their heads on the table. It was bad enough that Kisame was about to get his ass handed to him, but now Eva had decided to join in the pestering. Frustratingly, no one else seemed to care what happened, since they were just as interested and willing to be peaceful if they might get an answer out of it.
"Why are you so interested to know anyway?" the Akatsuki leader inquired.
Eva giggled. "You're still avoiding the question. That means your hiding something."
"Oh ho ho…could it be that they're yours?" Kisame chuckled darkly, glancing at Konan, then back at Pein. Konan noticed this and choked on a bit of pancake. She took a sip of water and straightened up, glaring at Kisame indignantly and giving off the look of a bird with ruffled feathers. The other Akatsuki members shoved pancakes in their mouths almost simultaneously to hide their sniggers.
"You two are really starting to annoy me…" Pein leaned his head down and rubbed the bridge of his nose. Leah and Claire scooted their chairs as far away from Pein as they could without being noticed. In the event that he suddenly decided to shred Eva and Kisame into a million fleshy pieces, they didn't want to be caught in the crossfire.
"If you really have nothing to hide, it shouldn't matter," the morbid blonde prompted.
The fish-man shrugged casually. "They're simple 'yes' or 'no' questions."
"Someone, make them shut up!" Pein groaned, throwing his head back in exasperation.
They all sat idly by though, since he hadn't bothered to specify who 'someone' was, and they were all still hoping for an answer. Plus, it could be interpreted as a rhetorical plea. So they all just ate their breakfast, carrying on very small conversations and pretending that they weren't listening.
"Eva, I think you should kind of shut the fuck up," Leah hissed at her friend nervously.
"Just answer the two questions and we'll stop asking you," Kisame bartered, trying to look sincere but still ending up with that disturbing grin.
"Tobi!" the Akatsuki leader barked suddenly.
Tobi started and snapped his head up. "Yes?!"
"Occupy them, distract them, I don't care, just shut. Them. UP!"
Kisame and Eva were still looking at Pein, convinced that this demand would also be ignored. Tobi had to want to know whom the handcuffs belonged to, too.
However, they hadn't taken into account that Tobi was the Akatsuki's fidgety little obedient mouse. Looking hysterically from side to side for something to fulfill this request, Tobi was suddenly struck with an idea.
Had Kisame not be distracted, he probably wouldn't have been able to do it. Eva wouldn't have been a problem in either case, but it was still lucky that she was looking away too.
With a burst of speed that none of them would have thought possible of their newbie member, black-gloved hands shot across the table. A succession of little winding clicks hit the air, and…
Eva and Kisame looked down to find themselves sporting matching pink bracelets.
Everyone stared for a minute while it registered what had happened. Then the nervous scattered laughter started, growing stronger and louder as they all quickly lost their self-control. Pein stood up, smiling slightly.
"For the record," he said to them, though they were still staring dumbfounded at their wrists. "I don't know whose they are. And they definitely aren't mine." He picked up his plate casually, and made to go towards the kitchen. "Though at the moment, it looks like they belong to you two."
XxX
The front door opened loudly for the second time that day around nine o'clock and nineteen pairs of ninja eyes turned toward the door. The only one who didn't look was the Kazekage, Gaara, whose pale green irises were trained on Charli, as he had made it his personal mission not to let the girl out of his sight.
"Merry Christmas!" Rachel's light voice rang out through the house. "Charli I've got a present for you—" They heard some struggling while Rachel muttered something under her breath. Then something metal clicked and the next second a gigantic gray dog came barreling into the room with the force of a bulldozer and all the intentions of one.
Tracey MacElliot the Third pushed off her hind legs into the air and crashed onto Hinata with her forepaws pushing on the Hyuuga heiress's shoulders and knocking her to the ground with a thud. The giant gray dog licked Hinata's face and wagged her tail so hard that her whole body shook, as if she was saying hello to someone she hadn't seen in months when in obvious reality it was the first time she had met Hinata.
Hinata was used to this kind of treatment from Akamaru and was giggling as she tried to push the oversized dog off of her form.
"Tracey!" Rachel yanked on the dog's collar, guided her to her side, and firmly held her there. "I am so sorry, this happened last time too—wait, are you a friend of Leah's?" she asked, realizing that she did not recognize Hinata and automatically assuming she would be Leah's friend due to her age.
"We're not," Hinata answered politely as Kiba offered her a cloth to wipe the dog slobber off her face.
Rachel backed up, staring suspiciously at the new group of people. She had never met them and Jason had never told her about them. They weren't the same weird people that she went to Fuddruckers with either. And some of them were dressed in black uniforms that resembled—oh shit.
"Um, excuse me, I need to talk to Jason," Rachel said hurriedly and released Tracey.
"He's in his room," Charli informed.
Rachel nodded and quickly exited the room, heading up the stairs. She made her way to Jason's room at the end of the hallway and knocked rapidly on the door.
"Yeeeeeeeeeeeess?" Jason said imitating some cartoon character that Rachel did not recognize.
"I think there's some sort of police officers downstairs, do you know about this?" Rachel said uneasily.
Jason's door flew open. "Did porn suddenly become illegal or something!" he screeched frantically before it even registered whom he was talking to.
Rachel crossed her arms in front of her chest and gave him the look only women could give to their soon-to-be husband.
"Um…" Jason recovered his posture and looked around sheepishly.
"It is when you have a fiancée…" Rachel clarified darkly.
"I love you?" he squeaked anxiously.
Rachel couldn't help but smile at him then eventually laughing. This was one of the reasons she loved Jason, when he wasn't working he was without a doubt one of the funniest and weirdest guys she knew, whether it was intentional or not.
Rachel reiterated what she had seen downstairs and Jason explained the situation to her dismissively. Although she didn't like the fact he was letting them stay in his house (frankly, she thought it was kind of stupid on his part) she went along with it. After all, she didn't have to live here…yet.
"Okay, remember that we're having Christmas dinner at my parents house tonight, make sure you and Charli clean up and look nice. You want to make a good impression with my family. Alright?" Rachel laced hands behind Jason's neck and smiled at him as sweetly as she could.
"Sure thing, Rachel."
"And we need to start planning our wedding. It's only six months away and we have a lot of stuff to get done. I'll be coming over first thing tomorrow so we can get busy, okay?"
"Depends what you mean by 'get busy'," Jason smirked mischievously and pulled Rachel closer to him.
She laughed and hit him playfully, "None of that until the wedding."
Jason's face fell. "B-but but—"
She grinned. "You think you can last that long?"
"No!" he protested honestly.
"Well you have your porn and your hand so I think you'll live."
Jason narrowed his eyes and pointed at her. "That was rude."
"It's true."
"Seriously Rachel, do you really think that lowly of me?" he gave her a puppy face.
Rachel laughed. "I'm only kidding."
He sighed in relief. "Thank God."
"But seriously, no sex until the wedding," she smiled evilly and retreated down the hall.
"You are a cruel person!" Jason cried after her.
xXx
Suigetsu kicked at a small rock, watching it skip jerkily down the path in front of him. He huffed and put his hands in his pockets, wishing he had at least gotten a little sleep. But no, he just had to tell Sasuke that his last hostage had escaped. He had wanted to see him spazz out, maybe blow something up with chidori or something, just for the sake of frustrating him and for once not being the one at fault.
Well, he had gotten his first wish. Sasuke had spazzed, losing his composure and yelling for all things within a mile radius to hear (a dangerous span when one was a missing-nin). He had very nearly chidori-ed a tree into oblivion too, but then the glow lighting up his hand buzzed out and his calm (aka emo) demeanor reappeared.
And then Sasuke had ordered them all to go out and look for the little bitch. Even him, Suigetsu, who had spent the last couple hours going to Konoha and back lugging his heavy sword and being terrorized by flies and listening to songs that made no sense, etc. Stupid twit. Leah, or whatever…
He stopped, furrowing his brow at the ground in frustration.
No, that wasn't fair. He shouldn't blame Leah.
This was all Karin's fault. Yep, that was much better. After all, if Karin hadn't existed, he wouldn't have tried to sneak into her tent to put the aforementioned fly he had finally captured in her tent. And if he hadn't wanted to do that, he wouldn't have noticed that Leah wasn't in the tent. And if he hadn't noticed Leah wasn't in the tent, he wouldn't have wanted to tell Sasuke. And if that hadn't happened…well…he wouldn't be here.
Suigetsu frowned and squinted from the glare of the moon cutting through the trees and looked down again. He kicked another rock, harder this time, 'cause it was bigger. But the rock didn't jump ahead of him and bounce off into the knotted weeds like he had thought it would. It fluttered up in the air, and he nearly fell forward because he had put so much force into the kick and nothing substantial had been there to stop it.
He caught the still-airborne object in his hand. It wasn't a rock or even a leaf. It was a piece of paper. And there was something written on it. Suigetsu squinted at it again, moving back into the light where he had found it so he could read it better. The corners of his mouth turned up sadistically as he read the three little words scribbled hastily across the scrap.
XxX
"Anyone find anything?" Sasuke asked as he paced in front of his three-man squad.
"Sorry, Sasuke, there was nothing there," Karin replied solemnly, shaking her head.
"I didn't see anything either," Juugo affirmed.
Sasuke stopped pacing in front of the still-smiling Suigetsu. "What about you?"
Suigetsu rocked back and forth on his heels, examining his nails. "Nothin' much," he drawled.
Sasuke's face contorted in some kind of downward sneer. He whirled around and exhaled like an angry bull.
"Oh," Suigetsu spoke up, grin widening. "There was one thing. I don't know if it's important though."
"What is it?" the stressed Uchiha demanded. "Show me!"
Suigetsu fumbled with his pockets for a moment like he didn't know where he had put it. Karin glared at him in addition to Sasuke's frustrated snorts, knowing he was doing it on purpose.
"Aha!" He held out a small piece of paper, waggling it triumphantly in front of Sasuke's nose. It was snatched up immediately and the Mist nin hastily withdrew his hands. He nudged Juugo playfully in the ribs and shrugged as if to say 'What's his problem…?'
Five minutes later, Sasuke was still looking at the paper. Karin hesitantly approached him, putting her hand on his shoulder and peeking at the thing he was clenching so tightly in his hands the skin under his nails was almost the same color.
She wiped off her glasses to get a better look at what it said, and scowled.
Itachi says "Hi"
Author's Note:
Leah: YAY! I think this is our most perverted chapter yet! And I wasn't much of a victim this time! –hides from Eva's perverted mind-
Claire: LEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! I LOVE YOUUUUU! –grabs Leah's leg and sobs like a moron-
LEAH HELPED ME AND WE FINALLY GOT THE CHAPTER DONE I'M SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG I WAS BEING LAZY AND I WROTE WHEN I WAS GUILTY BUT THEN I STOPPED AND I KEPT TALKING TO LEAH AND EVA AND GETTING IDEAS BUT I STILL DIDN'T WRITE AND THEN LEAH SAID SHE WOULD HELP ME AND SHE DID AND THEN WE GOT THE CHAPTER DONE IN TWO DAYS.
Leahhhhhhhhhhhhh I love youuuuuuuu. –cries more-
Fucking two months for a chapter is ridiculous. Omg I cannot express how…disgusted I am with myself for failing so much. This story is cool…I should always be very eager to write it…bah.
But instead I've been doing stupid crap like dying my hair blue and discovering it doesn't show up on top of my un-dyed hair (color stripping thing…gets rid of hair color that you died your hair with but doesn't make your hair your natural color) and then bleaching it and taking tests for my drivers permit and sending my iPod to get fixed and getting my wisdom teeth removed and fighting with my parents and getting depressed and getting sick 'cause Leah's got a contagious disease and sewing things and NOT WRITING.
So yeah, I'm busy doing nothing…-glance-
-looks at page-
DAMMIT. I've been trying to shorten my author's notes because they're soooooo annoying…for me at least, I mean, I don't know how you people put up with them cuz I can't get through them on other people's stor—AUGH I'M DOING IT AGAIN! SHIT!
-sniff-
I just have so much to say…
Eva: XD HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I love the last line. I seriously cannot get over it. –scrolls up to read it again- HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Okay, I'm done now.
Yeah. I'm going to be doing most of the writing with the me and Kisame and the fuzzy pink handcuffs. Who knew the little lollipop had it in him? :D
But hopefully we'll get the next chapter out sooner because I feel like writing right now, and am actually going to start working on the next chapter right now. 00 –knocks on wood- the laws of the universe will make me eat my….typed words now, but yeah.
:D