I wake in pain. Every muscle in my body aching, and my head throbbing. I try to limit myself to just moving my eyes, a white wooden ceiling, my room. I'm on my back for sure, my hands burn, and my heart beat moves my chest, sending a short shock of pain through it. Like tightening. I try to move my fingers, they rub against something soft, but rough. "You've got bandages on your hands," A male voice says, "you took quite the fall, you're lucky you didn't break anything, it's extraordinary that you didn't die," his voice is deep, like it might make his chest rumble if I held my hand there. "I can't see you," I say, it hurts for me to move my head. I hear the creak of a wooden chair, and heavy footsteps. Soon a young man leans over me, a shy smile stuck to his lips. He looks concerned. "Would you like to sit up?" He asks me,
"Yes please," I say. I watch as he leans forward, his chest close to my face, he's fixing the pillows behind me. He smells sweet when I breathe in, like almonds, vanilla and something masculine. I groan softly when he touches my back. He visibly winced but finishes, and backs away. I give him a thankful smile, I can now see the door, but this isn't my room. The desk is in the wrong place. And the door is to the left rather than right. "Where am I?" I ask him,
"My house, what's your name?" He sits on the side of the bed, next to my knees.
"Aislin," I say, "Aislin Teriga,"
"I'm Alex Bringinher," he smiles, his teeth are white and straight, his hair is short and dirty blonde, and his eyes are a peculiar color. Purple. He has a soft long nose. His lips are a bit thin and he has a goatee starting. He's handsome. "How old are you?" I ask,
"I take the test tomorrow," he says, same as me,
"You're 16, where are your parents?" It's getting easier to talk,
"Working, making food for everyone," His hands are on the bed next to him, is this his bed?
"Oh, how did you find me?"
"You collapsed on my porch in front of my door, I was cleaning the dishes, I heard a thud and ran, to find you," He says, his fingers gripping the sheets, he's tense. A lie maybe? "Why are you nervous," I ask him, he looks up at me,
"There's a girl in my bed," I almost want to laugh, but that would hurt too much so I just smile. He looks alarmed, "What?" He asks, I shake my head slowly.
"Do you know what time it is?" I ask him. He checks his watch,
"6 a.m."
"Thank you," I say, touching my fingers to his. He jumps a bit and looks at me with a shy smile. "Do you want to stand up?" He asks me, I nod. I don't hurt as much. His hand grabs mine gently. He pulls me up gently, his fingers are long, and his nails have paint under them. He's a builder.
I smile to him when I'm sitting up all the way, my feet are on the ground, they're bare. Bare feet in another persons house means a close relationship between the people that live there. Alex helps me to my feet slowly, the floorboards creaking beneath us. "Thank you," I say softly. He just smiles and helps me out of the room.
Soon enough I'm sitting at his kitchen table while he starts making food. "Alex, I should get home," I say, he keeps cutting carrots, "What's at home?"
"My sister, my little sister, and my father," I say a bit more aggressive than I meant to. He throws some cabbage leaves into the pot on the stove, it's boiling now, so he turns down the heat. "Something happen? Between your father and you I mean," I perk up, and he turns to look at me as he leans back casually against the counter. When he sees the look on my face he sighs "Sorry, you don't have to tell me, my mother is from Candor, and old habits die hard," He says to me.
"My father and I don't see eye to eye most of the time,"
"I wouldn't know," He looks solemn, his eyes cast downward, "My father is from Abnegation," there is a moment of silence before I realize how incredibly sensual this whole experience is. He's making me food, my shoes are off and he leans against the counter with his hands atop it. Like we know each other, like we've been friends forever. I need to go, I'm too comfortable.
I rise to my feet quietly, but Alex's eyes find mine anyway. He says to me in a calm voice, "I like to think that we could've been good friends," I pause and think for a moment, "What makes you say that?" I ask him.
"You're not staying here in Amity, are you?" I freeze, "maybe we could meet after the test, and talk about our results?" He offers turning away from me, back to the food.
"Why?" I ask,
"Because I have a feeling I won't be able to see you after tonight,"
"You're either kind, crazy, or selfless, of which, I can't decide what you are,"
"Maybe all three," he smiles thoughtfully, "or maybe you're not looking hard enough, maybe you're not reading into people as well as you think,"
"I wasn't born Candor," I say quickly,
"No," he says, "you weren't, with good reason, I can't imagine you being so dull,"
"Dull would be from Abnegation," I correct,
"True, but you're smart too, so it makes me think," He sets the knife down and walks over to me, pressing softly on my shoulders, sitting me down as he says gently "What if you're smart, kind, selfless, honest, and brave?"
"Brave?" I ask,
"The tree, you're up and walking when you should be passed out," He helps put on my boots, I am more than thankful, it would hurt to bend over. "Many would call that foolish," I say,
"Maybe, but some people learn from pain," he glances up at me, "I hope you're one of those people,"
"Maybe I'm not and I do it for kicks and giggles," he ties my boots,
"Then you wouldn't last," He says cryptically, then stands up walking back to the food, seeing it's done and gets a bowl from the cupboard. "Last?" I'm confused,
"Or maybe you would," he pours in soup, "you could be all, couldn't you?"
"All? You mean the Factions?" He sets the bowl in front of me, "that's impossible," I say,
"Not impossible, just extremely rare," he smiles, "I for one, would like to see you when you realize that," He looks at me with fascination. My heart skips as he closes his hand gently around mine, then he presses his lips to my forehead. My cheeks light on fire, he pulls away and smiles almost sadly. "You should go home, Aislin," His hand leaves mine and he walks into his room. Is it possible to love someone you've just met?
I find myself standing at my front door to my house, the thoughts and conversation from earlier with Alex playing out again and again in my head. The sun is high in the sky and hot on my back. I breathe in and open the door, seeing blood on the floor, like drag marks. "Angela," I say just above a whisper. It only takes a second for me to sprint into the doorway of the downstairs bathroom. "Angela?" I call weakly, what if my father did something to her? What if she got hurt? I'm up the stairs like the wind, "Angela!" I yell for her, my lungs burning, but I don't care, I don't care! My little sisters hurt and I can't find her! I slam open the upstairs bathroom door.
My father stands in front of her with blood on his shirt, his back is to me. "Angela?" It's just above a whisper but still audible. She pokes her head over and she has a smile on her face, "Aisi!" She squeals, her eyes are red and puffy, her nose is pink too. She's been crying. There's dirt on her face, and a scrape on her cheek. My father turns and looks at me, I'm ready to call him a son of an unworthy word. He looks tired, but his eyes are alert. His sleeves and abdomen area on his shirt are stained with blood. He moves slightly. He's holding a bloody wet rag, but a sigh of relief escapes my lungs when I see the cut and scrape on my sisters leg. Her shoe is off, she's got a cut along the arch of her foot up just above her ankle. She's got scrapes on her shin and knee. The wounds are clean. My father didn't hurt her.
He holds wrapping and bandage in his other hand, I step towards them taking the bandages from our father. "You should clean up," I say to him, "I'll take it from here," for a moment he looks angry, but he says nothing and walks away. After I hear him close the door from downstairs I look up at my sister. Who is beaming down at me, "Where ya been Aisi?" She's twelve, but sometimes she's so childish it makes me fuzzy inside. "Well," I take her small foot in my hand, and gently start wrapping it, "I fell out of a tree yesterday," she gasps dramatically,
"Where did you go?"
"Well I got really hurt, so I tried walking back here, but I wound up on a nice boys porch," I say with a smile,
"Did he take care of you?"
"Yes he did," I rip where it ends and tuck in the access bandage, "his name is Alex, and he's taking the Aptitude test with me tomorrow," I tell her with a gentle smile.
"Do you like him?" I stand up all the way and work on disinfecting her scrapes. Why did she ask that? I change the subject, "There was a lot of blood on the floor, you scared me, what happened?" She smiles,
"I fell,"
"Oh yeah?" She nods, "how'd that happen?"
"I tripped," she's giving me vague answers, this isn't like her. "What did you and papa do while I was gone?"
"Papa played cards with me!" She says,
"Really? What game?"
"Poker!" My jaw goes slack, she giggles. Poker? Hardly a game for a child. I pick her up and set her to the floor gently, she knows not to put too much weight on her foot. My father has finished washing up and has changed his shirt. He looks fresh, if I did not know this man I would have a newfound respect for him. I would say he's one of the best members here in Amity, doing his job the way he should. But, I do know this man, he is Ryan Teriga, my father, and the husband to my mother. He is the man who made me suffer in the shadows of my room, while I worked my fingers until they bled to keep this monster of a man from my sister.
I will leave Amity, but my sister will be untouched. I rise to my feet and give him a glare, "I will see you in the morning Angela," I say with a smile. I walk past my father without a second glance and walk to the end of the hall. Opening and closing my door behind me. It is only now that I realize adrenalin has kept my body going, and reacting like a pain killer, I bring my hand over my mouth just as the shocks rip through my body, I scream into my hand. Tears form in my eyes as my head pounds and my ears ring, my chest aches and tightens. I stumble to my bed and pass out before my head hits the pillow.
I wake with a wet spot against my cheek. The tears. My head isn't aching and it doesn't hurt to breathe. I'm better. There is a soft knock at my door, I get up and open it. I fell asleep with my boots on, oops. Samantha is on the other side, wearing a pretty red dress with yellow threaded flowers on her chest. Her hair is in a waterfall braid. "Hey," I say surprised. She smiles, and I notice the bag in her hand, "I thought I could do your hair for you, and there's a boy waiting for you, so why not give you one of my dresses? I know you don't own any," her voice is quiet, gentle, soft, but full of emotion. I nod and let her in, closing the door behind her.
She stands there, looking at my room. I know what she's doing, she's taking it all in, after this, I won't be here anymore. And this room will become an empty space, maybe an office for my father. This room will no longer smell of me, it won't have any of my possessions. They will be removed and thrown away. To make it easier to forget me for my family. The old picture that was once my mothers will go to my sister, it is of a mountain, a dark mountain with a dark forested valley, and the sun is rising behind it. My clothes will be given to my sister, and everything else will go.
Samantha smiles sadly and looks at me, "Undress for me? And then go wash up, we've got a few hours, until we need to start walking," I nod and start stripping, when I'm down to my underclothes, I walk to the upstairs shower. Amity, tend to wake up an hour or so after sunrise. It doesn't matter what time of year it is, it's like clockwork for us. It only takes me 7 minutes to scrub the dirt from my skin and beneath my nails. My hair is clean and soft and I get rid of any unwanted hair from my body. I don't always do this, only on special occasions, like birthdays. Normally the dirt or mud would cover up my skin, from spending all day farming. When I get out I glance in the mirror.
My normally dark brown hair is black and silky, sliding down around my soft shoulders, and down my back. My skin is a soft tan cream, my eyes are big, my eyelashes are dark and long, my eyes are also deep like my sisters, my eyebrows dark. My cheekbones a bit defined, my nose soft, but pointed. My cheeks have a few freckles, but they're fading, my lips are full and rosy, my chin a bit sharp. I find my eyes, they're a forest green, but if you look closely, they have flakes of orange in them. I give a toothy smile into the mirror and see my straight white teeth, my k-9s a bit sharp, but that's normal. I bite my lip and walk back to my room, away from the face of my mother in the mirror.
Samantha has laid out my dress on my now made bed. A pair of jean booty shorts goes under the dress. I see her sitting on the edge of the bed, "Get dressed please, I'll work on your hair," I drop the towel and pull on the dress, then some underwear and the booty shorts. I sit in front of her and she dries my hair, "Samantha?"
"Yes Aislin?"
"Are you staying in Amity?" She starts to braid my hair, I watch her in the mirror across from us. "I can tell you after the test," she says thoughtfully, "I don't know if I'm staying here or not," I stay quiet. We remain silent until she's halfway done, "You want me to look after Angel," she says,
"Yes," even though I don't need to tell her she's right. "I can't leave her with Ryan," I tell her quietly, I watch as she presses her lips in a thin line, her fingers working expertly with the strands of my hair. "Aislin, I want to apologize for, my actions the other day," she means the kiss, I look at her in the mirror and smile softly as her eyes find mine, "It's fine Sam, believe me, when I tell you, I love you, but not in that way," I say gently, she nods and finishes my hair. It's a love braid, tucked into a bun. Showing off my neck and collar. She smiles back at me and stands, hugging me.
We walk downstairs after finishing up, I notice she has flowers in her braid and I smile. Alex is sitting at the table looking well kept, he shaved, and he wears a jean jacket, his pants have a hole in the knee. He rises to his feet and smiles, bidding farewell to my father, he leads us out to the road.
Half way down he and Samantha engage in a friendly conversation, that I tune out. My mind is swimming with thoughts of what I'm going to do about my father, and where my sister will stay. What will happen if I leave Amity? Will my sister take my place in my father's mind? What if I stay? Will I continue to suffer? If I leave, will Angela resent me for getting away? I bump into something solid but soft and warm. Alex has crouched in front of me, his hands to his sides closer to me, "You're falling behind, hop on," A piggy back ride? I shrug and place my hands on his shoulders then step closer to him, his hands slide up my dress along my bare legs. I blush and hope he doesn't notice me trembling. Soon enough I'm on his back, his hands at my under knees. Samantha takes one look at us when we catch up to her, and laughs. We arrive on time with everyone else and Alex decides its smart to sprint into the building making a commotion while Samantha keels over laughing at the faces of the Abnegation Alex sprints past.