The drive back was silent. Root leaned uncomfortably in the backseat, her forehead pressed against the car's window as she watched the buildings fly by, not bothering to focus her sight on any particular thing. She could sense Shaw looking at her through the rear view mirror every now and then. Root clenched her teeth and pursed her lips, frustrated at how they had let it happen. How she had let this happen. Harold tried to place his hand on her shoulder once, his gesture apologetic, but Root just flinched away from the touch. She didn't need comfort or pity from him. She needed him to support her, to believe her more, and he had failed once again. She remembered Greer's words. 'You still fear her more than you respect her.' She blinked quickly a few times, trying to dissipate the waterworks threatening to flood her eyeballs.
John had stayed behind, waiting for Fusco to show up so they could treat the scene as a homicide and retrieve Claire's body from the icy gray street.
Harold, Shaw and Root walked into the old and abandoned subway station, the lights dim as usual. Bear trotted his way up to them, his tale wiggling at first, but stopping when he sensed something was wrong. Clever dog, Root thought.
Root stood in the middle of the station, watching absently as Shaw patted Bear on the head, ruffling his fur for a long minute.
Chewing the inside of her cheek, Root tried to keep herself from bursting out accusations. She kept staring at Shaw while Harold was in the subway car, putting down his bag and his coat, and she couldn't stop herself any longer. The feeling of betrayal clasping around her throat until she opened her mouth.
"Why didn't you do it, Shaw?" The tone in her voice surprising herself. She wanted it to sound mad and solid but it only sounded broken and wounded.
Shaw looked up at her, retrieving her hands from Bear who whined faintly in protest. Shaw didn't say anything in return and that only irritated Root even more, how she was just standing there, analyzing Root's traits without answering her question.
"Why didn't you shoot him?" Root repeated and this time her voice and her glare radiated anger.
Shaw turned her palms out, shrugging slightly as she looked at her, questioningly, with lifted eyebrows.
"What was I supposed to do? Risk killing you too?"
"Yes, that's exactly what you were supposed to have done!" Root shouted.
Shaw started to fume with irritation.
"I didn't just save your sorry ass a couple of weeks back to kill you today!"
Hearing them yell, Harold walked to the entrance of the subway car, trying to think of a way to calm down the waters, but not sure how nor when to intervene, so he just stood there, his mouth slightly open.
"What if it was me, Root?" Shaw asked, giving two steps forward in Root's direction. "What if it was me asking you to shoot. Would you have done it?" She added, pointing a finger at Root's face.
Root cracked, two tears sliding down her face as she shoved Shaw's finger away.
"No, but that's different!" Root answered, wiping the stubborn tears away as soon as they fell.
Shaw shook her head, eyebrows furrowed, visibly peeved. "How is it any different, Root?" She barked.
"Because I – care for you!" Root said immediately, almost choking on the phrase when some other word threatened to roll out of her tongue. An involuntary closed fist swung up in a swift motion and pressed on Shaw's chest, just below her collar bones, without discharging its stored energy, though.
She looked deeply into Shaw's eyes before looking away into the cold floor of the subway station, the energy in her fist dissipating into a weak push that barely made Shaw stagger.
"You are not supposed to care." Root added, still not daring to look back into Shaw's face.
Through the corner of her eye she could see that Sameen was hesitating on what to say next. The smaller woman's hand waving up and down as she internally dueled with her next words.
But it was Harold who eventually spoke.
"Ms. Groves, there was nothing we could do to prevent the outcome of today's events. One way or the other, this would have been a lost battle."
Root turned at him.
"Yes there was a way to prevent the outcome, Harold! If only you had trusted me," she spat. "All of you!" She added, looking towards Shaw as she spoke the words. Turning on her heels, she headed to the exit of the hideout without another word.
When she reached the cold air of New York City, Root started walking without even bothering to know where she was going. She would just walk away until the Machine whispered directions in her ear to some place where she could stay for the night.
"Root, stop!" A familiar voice said loudly behind her, causing her to stop suddenly. It was Sameen. She lowered her head slightly, thinking about turning around and facing the other woman, but decided not to, resuming her pace almost as suddenly as she had stopped.
Shaw sighed loudly behind her. And then a strong hand grabbed her arm and swung her around.
"Hey. Snap out of it, Root!" Shaw said. Root's slightly blood-shot eyes finding hers. "This wasn't your fault, nor mine, nor Harold's!"
Root could feel her chest burning. She hadn't felt so angry and hurt in a long time, even when she was almost dying in the couch of someone's house not even a month back.
She found herself staring at Shaw's full lips once again, and she had to force herself to look away, biting on her lower lip as she tried to steady her beating heart, her gaze locking on a small glowing piece of broken glass on the sidewalk.
"Claire told me something before they killed her." Root said after taking a deep breath. "When she hugged me."
Shaw let go of Root's arm. Even without looking at her face, Root could see the change in Shaw's features, suddenly surprised and puzzled.
"My building. Under the third step." Root verbalized Claire's message.
"Why didn't you say that before?" Shaw asked.
Root shrugged.
"I wanted to check it out first."
Shaw scolded her. Arguing at how unwise Root was being for thinking to go back there alone. Root kept staring at the small piece of glass on the floor. She sighed when Shaw finally stopped rebuking her.
Silence fell between them for a few never-ending seconds, only cut by the sound of people's bustle and cars roaring on the roads nearby. Root felt Shaw's impatience building up, so she decided to add her voice to the background noise.
"Why didn't you shoot?" Root faintly asked Shaw again. She didn't want to look at Shaw, didn't want to see the mesh of anger and exasperation in her eyes. She just waited for Shaw to snap and walk away.
But Shaw didn't.
More silence.
"I do care, Root." Shaw finally said and Root lifted her eyes from the floor, meeting Shaw's, unsure she had heard the correct words. Pleading to hear them once more. And as if understanding this plead, Shaw spoke again.
"I do care for you."
Root felt the blood leaving her heart as it seemed to stop pounding against her chest. She opened her mouth slightly as the air got caught in her airways. Had Shaw just admitted she cared for her?
Shaw stepped closer, and Root tried to process what was happening, her brain suddenly too cloudy to work properly. Shaw's hand found her arm again. Not grabbing. Just touching.
Shaw was so inevitably close that Root's eyes betrayed her again, fluttering to Sameen's lips for a fraction of a second before she forced them up again to meet the other woman's glowing dark orbs.
"I do care for you." Shaw repeated, making sure that Root had understood what she had said before, letting her know she meant it, bluntly.
As Shaw's hand glided around her neck and pulled her closer, Root simply closed her eyes tightly, waiting to wake up at any second. But she never did. Instead, the warmth of Shaw's lips met hers, merely brushing at first, then collapsing in a tender and craved kiss.