Song - So Cold by Ben Cocks

It had been two days and I still couldn't bring myself to go home just yet. So, I rented a motel room just outside of town and picked up a phone charger and a few outfits.

My phone started buzzing again from the nightstand of my motel room. I glanced over to the phone's screen for a second, it was Kol. He was relentless and wouldn't stop calling me. "God, take a bloody hint." I mumbled, leaning over and pressing the reject button on the screen.

I leaned back into a pillow I had propped behind my back and hugged my knees to my chest. I let out a sigh as I rested my chin on top of my knees.

Part of me considered the possibility of going home, what it would be like. I knew I'd eventually have to talk to someone else other than my own reflection.

On another note, I was starving. I hadn't fed since the other night and that was three days before. I guess I had drank enough to sustain myself for that time, but I was starting to feel weak.

I decided to stop moping and go out and try to have some fun. I wasn't in the mood for cleaning up after a big mess. I decided that I would pick just one victim. So, I got up and went outside.

I didn't have the patience to drive around and try to find a bar, so I settled on going for a man I saw walking down the street just across from the motel. It was late, so I used the darkness to my advantage and flashed over behind him.

"Excuse me?" I asked innocently.

He jumped before turning to face me and I gave him a coy smile. He smiled back and said, "Hello. Can I help you miss?"

"Can you come with me for a second? Please?" I asked politely. I thought he might be gullible enough to just come with me.

He gave me a confused look. "Miss, you seem very nice and all, but I don't have any money." he said meekly.

I scoffed. "I'm not a prostitute you dumb bloke." I snapped, rolling my eyes.

"Oh," he mumbled, looking down at his shoes. "I didn't mean to, umm" he started to apologize.

I cut him off before he could start babbling again. "Enough of that." I interrupted. I grabbed him by the arm and roughly pulled him behind a building. I put my hand on his shoulder and looked into his eyes. "You're going to do whatever I say and you aren't going to question me. Do you understand?" I compelled him.

He automatically nodded.

I smiled, "Good. Now, I want you to hold still and not scream." I instructed. I moved my hand up to his neck and titled his head to the side, giving me better access to his neck. I leaned forward and sunk my fangs into his carotid, draining him dry in 10 seconds flat.

I dropped his body to the ground and kicked it to the side. At least I was near the woods, an animal attack would be pretty reasonable. Not to mention the fact that I practically tore his throat out. I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand, before turning around and walking back to the motel room; I couldn't think of anything better to do.

My phone was buzzing again. I groaned before checking it. It was Caroline, so I decided to pick up. "Hello,"

"Hey, Juliet. How have you been?" she asked, I could hear the concern in her voice. Klaus probably told her about the breakup.

I scoffed. "Considering? I'm alright, I guess. I just need a little me-time and a little time to cool off." I replied, sitting down on the edge of the bed while keeping the phone glued to my ear.

"Okay. Your mom called mine earlier. She said that you haven't been home in a few days." She let out a sigh. "Your mother really misses you and wants you to come home." she said.

I rolled my eyes even though I knew she couldn't see me. "Right. Why would she want to be back in the same house as her little monster of a daughter? So she can tell me about how much of a disappointment I am?" I muttered, shaking my head. I swallowed, trying to keep my tone level. "Not a chance in hell."

Caroline huffed. I could practically feel her frustration. She wasn't exactly patient when it came to getting people to listen to her. She was determined. "Look, I get what you're going through. Believe me, I've been there. When my mother found out about me she didn't exactly accept me with open arms and a big 'congratulations' balloon. She hated vampires, she was upset and afraid. But, after a while and a lot of convincing she came around. Now we're closer than ever." She sounded a little upset since the subject really hit home for her.

"Be that as it may, it's still not the same. We aren't exactly the same, Caroline. You're...good. You don't kill people, I do and I can't exactly make any promises that I won't continue to do it; I just did not 5 minutes ago. It's a part of the way I want to live and if she can't handle that then there's no point in trying to reason with her. I'm just the straw that broke the camel's back." My voice cracked a little. I took in a deep breath, trying to calm myself before continuing. "We've had problems in the past. Maybe this is where it ends. She'll be fine without me, maybe better." I said quietly, chewing my lower lip.

"Of course she won't! You're her daughter for God's sake, her only one." she yelled, exasperated. "So help me, if you don't go and talk to her, I will find you and drag you to her by your hair!" she demanded. There wasn't a doubt in my mind that she was throwing her arms up in the air in frustration at the very moment.

I chuckled, shaking my head. "Caroline Forbes, you are single-handedly the most persistent and blatantly annoying person I have ever met." I huffed. "Fine, I'll go talk to her. I'm not making any promises, but I'll try to make things right." I conceded. Caroline was like the little voice in the back of my head that always knows what's right. An annoying little voice, but still right nonetheless.

She practically squealed. "Good! Let me know what happens." she insisted. She hung up, not giving me a chance to answer. She probably thought I would change my mind if I talked for even another second.

Honestly, I didn't know if going to see her would be a good thing or not. Maybe she would be willing to accept and forgive me. Maybe we could start over. I really needed her.

I slipped my phone into my back pocket and grabbed my car keys from the dusty tv stand before going out to my car and driving back toward Mystic Falls.

As soon as I drove past the town sign, I saw a dark figure on the road in front of me. I slammed on the brakes when there was barely a foot between us; the figure was Kol. Clenching my jaw, I unbuckled and flung the door open. "What the bloody hell are you doing? Get out of my way you arse." I spat, crossing my arms over my chest and leaning slightly on the side of the car.

He approached me, but left a space between us, trying not to upset me further. He held his hands up in defense. "I just want to talk, please. Just hear me out." he said firmly.

"I've been ignoring your calls for a reason. As if it isn't blatant enough already let me spell it out for you. I don't want to talk to you " I snapped, emphasizing the word don't.

He tried to hide the hurt look in his eyes. "I know that you're angry, believe me, I would feel the same way. We had a fight, but" he started confidently before I cut him off.

"It wasn't just a fight, Kol. Maybe you don't get dumped enough, or maybe you've never been dumped before, but in case you didn't know, that was a breakup. We're done. There's nothing else to talk about. You can apologize all you want, but it won't do a damn bit of good." I paused, taking a step forward, looking him straight in the eyes. "Now get out of my way." I seethed.

He was reluctant, angry even, but turned around and ran off into the night. I got back in my car and started back into town.

A few minutes later, I pulled up in front of my house. I stopped out front, not pulling into the driveway. I felt like a stranger in the presence of my own home, like I wasn't welcome.

"Maybe I shouldn't do this. Maybe I should just leave town for good." I thought aloud.

I shook my head. No, I had to do this. I wanted to make things right, or at least try. With a sigh, I turned off my car and got out. I stuffed my hands into my coat pockets as I crossed the yard to the front door.

Cautiously, I knocked on the door. I waited a few seconds, but there was no answer. "Odd, the lights are on. She should still be awake." I whispered to myself. I knocked again in case she hadn't heard me. Seconds later there was still no answer. I got a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach, something was wrong.

I tried the door, it was open. I carefully opened it, stepping through the threshold. That's when it hit me, blood, the smell of fresh blood. From what I could tell there was lots of it. I ignored ever instinct in my body as I ran toward the scent.

I found my mother lying on the floor of the living room, a brutal bite on the side of her neck. She was gasping for air, barely clinging to life. "Mum!" I screamed, rushing over to her, kneeling down and carefully lifting her limp body up, keeping my knees on the floor.

I bit into my wrist and offered my blood to her so she could heal. With what little strength she could muster, she raised her hand up and pushed it away. "No," she whispered. "I can't."

"What? What do you mean? You're dying! Please let me help you! Please!" I sobbed, tears began to cloud my vision. "You can't leave me!" I begged.

She shook her head. "No, no it's alright baby girl. I'm ready." she said, her voice was hoarse and weak. She was losing too much blood.

"I, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, mum. I failed you. You deserve a better daughter. I'm sorry." I was sobbing uncontrollably. "Please forgive me." I whispered.

"No you aren't. I love you, more than anything. You didn't fail me, I failed you." Her voice was almost inaudible. She began coughing violently.

Once the coughs quieted down, she spoke again. "I forgive you for everything you've done. You are not a bad person, Juliet. You need to know that. You need to know that I am so proud of you. You're so brave. Please remember that. I love you." she whispered, tears pouring from her own eyes.

"I love you too." I whispered back.

Her lips turned up into a small smile. She took in one last breath, before I heard her heart stop. Her smile fell and the light left her eyes.

I laid her body down on the floor. She was so pale, so cold. I closed her eyes, unable to look into them like they were, lifeless.

Weak, I fell to the floor next to her body. I sobbed uncontrollably, my whole body was aching. There wasn't a doubt in my mind of who had done this to her, it was Collin.

The anger and guilt mixed with the sadness and began to overwhelm me. I gasped for air, but I felt like I couldn't breathe. I felt like I was suffocating. In my entire life, I had never felt anything even close to what I felt in that moment. It was overpowering.

I pulled myself up from the floor and looked around frantically, I could barely see through the tears. The room began to spin.

Everything was just too overwhelming. I couldn't handle it. I don't know how I did it, but I reached deep down inside of myself and I stopped it. I stopped everything, the pain, the anger, every feeling. I turned it off, all of it.

A.N.- I got a little teary when I was writing this. I hope it was as powerful as I intend it to be. I had been thinking about making Juliet turn off her humanity, and thanks to the request of CSalvatore123, I decided to go for it. It's just something I want to explore for a little bit. I hope no one is upset by this! I've also had the idea of killing off her mother for a while.

Thanks to my very good friend, FanFicChikk, for proofreading everything for me!

Happy 4th of July to my fellow Americans. And again thanks for the support so far. I'll update soon.

Responses to recent reviews:

FanFicChikk: Thanks :) I just love Elijah and I thought it seemed like something he would do.

CSalvatore123: I decided to take your request since now seems like a good time. Let me know what you think!