The tiniest hint of a smile played on Jack's lips. He let out one, low chuckle. Rose looked at him, slightly puzzled. "Jack?"
"Rose, I kind of had an idea."
Rose's eyebrows flew up fast. "What? How could you have possibly known?"
"Last night, you said you were possibly seasick. There was something about the way you said possibly, as if you were really nervous. Then you were about to tell me something when Cal showed up. It just, I dunno, added up I guess."
Rose gaped at him for a moment, shocked that he had figured it out. Then, she burst out laughing. She tried to contain the giggles, but she failed. She laughed and laughed, allowing a few tears to fall from her eyes. "I'm sorry Jack," Rose said after a couple of minutes and she began to catch her breath. "Oh my goodness, my sides ache now." She wiped her face with her palms. "Wow."
Jack looked at her, full of amusement. "Would you care to tell me what is so hilarious?"
"Nothing Jack. I'm laughing because I'm relieved. First I figured out that I might be pregnant and I had no idea what to do. Then I found you and I was nervous about telling you. And here you tell me that you already knew!" Rose cleared her throat. "I just find it a bit ironic in the end."
Jack leaned forward and kissed her. He smiled at her and then his face turned serious. "Can I ask you something?"
"Anything."
"You said that you think you're pregnant. You're not one hundred percent certain?"
Rose shook her head. "Unfortunately, no I'm not. There's no way to know for sure until I see a doctor. But everything I'm experiencing tells me that I am pregnant Jack. I get queasy and dizzy. I've been sick a few times. I'm tired all the time." Rose brushed a lock of Jack's hair from his eyes. "At first I thought it was just something else. I actually told myself that it was because we left Rome and I left you behind without a good-bye. My heart was breaking a little more every day. It was breaking because I know I broke yours."
"Rose, sweetheart –"
"Jack, I can't tell you how sorry I am that I had to do that. I tried to get away. I wanted to meet you at the park and tell you…" Her voice cracked. "I was going to tell you that I want to leave Cal; that I want to be with you."
Jack cupped her face in his hands and pressed his forehead to hers. His heart skipped a beat at her words. "Please don't blame yourself Rose. It's not your fault. I never once thought that you just decided you didn't want to see me anymore." He kissed her softly. "The night you didn't show up, I was worried. Scared, actually. I walked to the mansion and saw that it was empty. Honestly, it was a bit of a relief because I was terrified that something had happened to you when you were on the way over."
"Oh Jack." Now it was Rose's turn to kiss him softly. She began to wrap her arms around him, but suddenly had to push him away. Without warning, Rose jumped up and ran to the toilet in the corner of the room. She was only sick for a moment or two. Jack squatted down behind her and rubbed her back lightly.
"Are you okay Rose?"
Rose nodded. "You don't have to do that Jack. This isn't exactly the most beautiful part of pregnancy." Slowly she got up and went to the sink.
"I've seen worse. I used to live on the streets ya know," he joked. Rose let out a small laugh as she rinsed her mouth out with some water. "Are you sure you're okay?"
"Yes. It goes away as quickly as it comes. I could use some fresh air though." Rose knew that Jack could go to first class as her guest. "Would you mind taking a walk with me?"
"Sure. I haven't been outside yet today, I could use the air too. Can I ask you a couple more things though, while we're still alone?"
"You can ask me anything," Rose told him as she sat back on the bed.
"When are you going to go see a doctor?" Rose explained to him the conversation that she and Ruth had had at breakfast and that she had already gone to ease her mother's concerns.
"But I told them that there was no chance that I was pregnant," Rose said. "I was planning to go again tonight after dinner. I'm assuming there will be a different doctor there and I'll just use a different name."
Jack nodded. "That seems like a good idea. The sooner we know the better." Jack took a deep breath. "Rose, I know you said it's my child, but I'm sorry, I have to ask. Is there any chance that Cal is the father?"
Rose shook her head. "No Jack. I know that you probably don't want to hear this, but Cal and I have only been together once since leaving Rome and that was the first night aboard the ship. My symptoms, specifically the extreme fatigue showed up days before that. More importantly, I'm late. Two, almost three weeks late.
It didn't take Jack more than a second or two to understand what she meant by late, and he let out a breath he didn't know he had been holding in. "I didn't realize I was frightened of what the answer might have been. I guess I was afraid that you were going to say that there was a possibility of it being Cal's."
Rose grabbed his hand tightly and stood, pulling him up with her. "I promise, there is no chance of that. My symptoms wouldn't even be showing if it was Cal's." She leaned forward and kissed him. "Now, how about that walk?"
As Jack let Rose lead him out of the cabin, he smiled to himself recalling Rose saying that she wanted to leave Cal to be with him.
…
Jack and Rose strolled along the boat deck. Both of them badly wished that they could hold hands, or even stand closer than they were. It wasn't easy, but they were resigned to the fact that they simply couldn't. They kept their voices low as they talked.
"So what did Cal have to say about inviting me to dinner?" Jack asked.
"Oh he wasn't happy at all. When we reached our cabin, I immediately got into a hot bath, claiming that I had a headache. I was trying to avoid a conversation about it, but I had no such luck."
"So he waited for you to get out of the bath?"
"I wish," Rose said. "No, I had only been in the bath a few minutes when he walked in and started demanding answers. 'Who is he? How do you know him? How did you manage to run into him?'" Rose told Jack, mocking Cal. "He wasn't happy that I referred to you as Jack instead of Mr. Dawson," she added. "And of course he was pissed that I was even on the third class boat deck."
"He yelled at you?" Jack suddenly felt a knot form in his stomach at the thought of Cal hurting her. "He didn't hit you did he?"
"No, Cal has never hit me. And he's really not one to yell. He'll raise his voice from time to time, but I really can't remember ever hearing him yell." Rose shrugged at the thought. "He prefers to talk in a demeaning tone, as if whomever he's speaking with is a complete fool. Don't be shocked if he talks to you like that tonight. The same goes for my mother."
"So then she knows of me?"
"Cal told her this morning, I guess. She threw a fit, concerned that it will cause some huge scandal." Rose rolled her eyes and chuckled. She leaned a couple inches closer to Jack. "If she only knew."
Jack laughed too. "What prompted you to invite me?"
"I have no idea Jack. The words just slipped out before I could think about it." Growing tired of walking, Rose sat in one of the lounge chairs that were lined along the deck. Jack sat in the one next to her. Except for the occasional passerby, there was no one around to hear their quiet conversation. "I just wanted to see you again. Obviously, I could have simply just come down to third class to see you." Rose sighed. "It wasn't like I was planning to tell you about being pregnant and dinner," she added in a whisper.
"That could make for an interesting meal!" Jack joked. Rose laughed and resisted the urge to place her hand on his leg.
"Cal doesn't expect you to actually show up. He said that's the only reason he extended the invitation. She didn't say as much, but I know my mother is expecting the same thing."
"Well won't they be disappointed?" Jack asked with a confident and somewhat cocky smile that Rose found endearing. Jack didn't have to ask why they expected him not to show. Anyone walking past could easily see that he was not from their world. He assumed that they thought they would be too ashamed of his appearance to show up.
Without asking permission, Rose suddenly reached over and grabbed Jack's portfolio from next to him. "Have you drawn anything new since Rome?" she asked, flipping through the sheets of paper.
"Yeah, but nothing to be proud of. Everything I drew seemed to lack life." He watched as Rose looked through them and wondered if she noticed the difference. "My heart just wasn't in it. Fabri noticed once or twice. Evonne noticed too."
Rose stopped flipping and looked up at him. "Who's Evonne?"
Jack realized that while Rose had seen the nude sketches, and that she knew that he had never slept with any of the prostitutes he drew, he had never told her their names. He reached for his portfolio and looked through the pages until he found a sketch of her.
"That's Evonne," he said, handing it to Rose.
"Oh." Rose felt heat travel up to her neck and face, dying her skin a deep crimson. Jack had gone to see one of the prostitutes he had known in Paris. Rose tried hard, but she couldn't help but feel jealous.
"Rose? Is something wrong?"
Rose closed the portfolio and handed it back to Jack. "No," she said quickly.
"Are you sure? I'm only asking because your face matches your hair right now." Rose saw the amused smirk on Jack's face and sighed.
"Okay fine. I'll admit that I got a little jealous. I know, it's stupid, but I couldn't help it."
Jack laughed. "I can promise that you have nothing to worry about." He had such a strong desire to pull her to him that Jack had to get up. He walked over to the railing and looked out at the ocean. Rose followed, doing the same. "Sorry," Jack muttered. "I just keep wanting to wrap my arms around you, and up here is not the place to do it, obviously."
"Probably not," Rose agreed. "So you saw Evonne after you left Rome then?"
"Yeah. I had read about Titanic's maiden voyage, and figured I might be able to get a ticket, so on my way to Southampton, I stopped in Paris. I tried to draw her, tried to find something that felt so familiar, I could get lost in it. But all I could think of was you." Rose smiled at Jack's words. "She asked me what was wrong, and I ended up telling her all about you and about how much –" Jack paused. Here was not the time or place to tell Rose that he was in love with her. "About how much I missed you," he finished.
Rose felt her body tingle. She knew what Jack was about to say before he decided to change his words at the last minute. She suppressed the urge to say something about it and looked back out at the ocean. "What 'cha thinking about?" Jack asked.
"A lot of things Jack," she said looking at him. Just past him, her eyes caught sight of her mother, Molly Brown, and the Countess of Rothes. "That we'll have to talk about later," she added sullenly. She nodded slightly in their direction, making Jack turn around. "Mother!" Rose cried with mock enthusiasm. "May I introduce Jack Dawson."
Ruth looked at Jack with very little interest. "Charmed, I'm sure." She looked back to Rose and then back to Jack. Rose saw the disdain written all over Ruth's face. In fact, Rose thought Ruth was looking at Jack like he was a dangerous insect that had to be squashed quickly.
Rose explained to the Countess and Molly who Jack was and how she had come to know him, trying her hardest to ignore Ruth's glare. Suddenly the horns blared, making them all jump slightly.
"Why do they insist on announcing dinner like a damn cavalry charge?" Molly asked. Rose chuckled.
"Shall we go dress mother?" Rose turned to Jack and smiled at him. "See you at dinner Jack." Jack waved at her and watched her walk away.
"Uh son? Son!" Jack looked at Molly. "Do you have the slightest comprehension of what you're getting yourself into?"
Jack had to laugh. He knew what he was getting into with Rose. But as for dinner, he had not one clue. "Not really," he admitted with a smile.
Molly took him by the arm and led him to her cabin where she gave him a tuxedo that she had bought for her son.
"Molly, I really appreciate it, but I can't accept this," Jack protested. Molly dismissed his protest with a wave of her hand.
"Oh please don't worry about it." Molly held out the jacket for Jack to slide on. "You shine up like a new penny Jack."
Jack smiled and Molly laughed happily. If she could tell he was nervous, she never let on. As he began to slick his hair back, he wondered what Rose would be wearing to dinner.
…
Rose stared at the dresses in her closet for nearly fifteen minutes. They were all gorgeous, made of the finest silks and satins. She wanted to look her best for Jack. Wanting to look her best was something that she had never known before. To her, an expensive dress was just an expensive dress. Sometimes she only wore a dress once, maybe twice before it was given to charity. In the long run, it had simply just never mattered to Rose what dress she put on. Sometimes Cal chose a dress for her, and that was just fine by her.
Her eyes settled on a deep red dress, made of soft satin. Black mesh lay over it, with silver beading. She remembered trying this dress on and knew that just the tiniest hint of cleavage showed. It had short sleeves and a short train behind it. Rose knew this was the dress to wear. A pair of long white gloves would complement it just right. Smiling to herself, she called in Trudy to assist her.