Episode 19: Heat; Haze; Hostility
Linkmon politely declined the Monitamon's second attempt to take his order. He was still not one for the idea of fake food. He also wasn't sure how long he'd be at the diner, even thou he had the entire day to wait around. Even if he was still unsure about it, his mission two days prior was viewed as an enormous success by the company. So, while Kurohi was handling the human end of such things, Link essentially had the day off to pursue his own agenda.
"Not that Kurohi really did anything. I did all the work."
"I didn't even do anything. Link did all the work."
"Wow, you sure don't take praise well." Erika handed Kurohi his cup of coffee.
They had gotten out of the office for lunch. Mostly due to the fact that Kurohi was sick and tired of everyone patting him on the back.
"I take praise just fine when it's deserved, thank you. And thank you for the coffee."
She sat down across from him. She had on that smile you get when your kid gets rejected for the first time. "Well, you made Link, and you made that evolution program, and that's what won the day, so it technically is because of you."
Kurohi had no smile. Just stoic disbelief. "That's so roundabout that I'm not going to bother to counter."
"If it makes you feel any better, I think you're just another lazy pencil pusher."
Kurohi scowled. "A lazy pencil pusher who massages your feet for you when you have a hard day."
"Oh, now you want praise?"
"I do not enjoy touching your feet."
She leaned back on her chair legs. "You so enjoy touching my feet."
"What I don't get-" Kurohi attempted to derail this train of thought."-is why a company that creates and distributes said Digimon can't seem to understand a Digimon working autonomously."
"Because that's not normal."
Train successfully derailed. Also: Kurohi was confused. "What?"
"Darcmon really doesn't do anything unless I tell her to. I'm pretty sure that's most people's experiences. I mean, have you ever seen a non-Illegal Digimon do much of anything on its own?"
"That's not right, right? I mean, when I had Duke and Zwart..."
"Did you ever ask them what they did when you weren't around?"
Kurohi thought back. Before he got Linkmon, he used to leave his Digimon home a lot, and when he returned they were always there waiting for him. It really had never occurred to him that all they did was wait.
"Erika, I think my inner child is crying."
She watched her coffee blend as she swirled it. "I'm sure he'll get over it." She took a sip. "If you want my advice, just smile and tell yourself they're all stupid and don't know any better."
Kurohi instantly put on a beaming smile and stared pointedly at her.
Erika shook her head. "Proud of yourself, foot fetish?"
"That's it. No more massages for you."
"I thought that I may find you here." A familiar and unwanted bird sat down across from Linkmon.
"Funny, I wasn't expecting to see you again so soon."
Bazaarmon chuckled. "Ah, Sahib Linkmon, I have seen to your request. I believe you promised me some sort of compensation for that."
"I promised payment upon delivery, and I'm pretty sure it's too big to stuff into that hat of yours."
Bazaarmon adjusted his turban. "Well then, I suppose if that is your wish, then I will simply wait with you here until it arrives." His beak stretched into a very contempt smile.
Linkmon let loose a sigh of surrender. "No no, I wouldn't want to keep you. I'll pay you now, but if it doesn't show up, I fill reclaim my payment and you will be treating me to some Tandoori Chicken." A flash of purple emanated from his gullet with the last words.
"Oh, do they serve that here? That sounds delightful."
Not taking the hint, Linkmon merely passed him the file over the table. "You can leave now."
"I suppose I must, thou I do wish you would let me stay. I am quite interested myself."
"I'll send you a picture."
"That will do. I shall take my leave then, Sahib Linkmon. Until the next time we do business~" He waved his wing and left.
And Linkmon was ever so glad to see the back of him.
"Please~? I said I was sorry."
"No."
The door to Kurohi and Erika's apartment quietly flew open.
"Come on~ I've been wearing heals all day and my feet are killing me."
"You brought this on yourself." Kurohi plopped cross-legged onto the couch. The remote bounced up next to him and he snatched it out of the air. In truth Kurohi wasn't really upset so much as annoyed, and her constant nagging wasn't making him any more willing.
"Like I said, I'm sorry."
"No. I massage your feet out of the great well of kindness in my heart, and you spat in the water."
"I didn't mean to spit in the kindness water." She sat down next to him and started hanging off his shoulder. She turned her big puppy-dog eyes at him and made a small whimper.
Well played, but Kurohi held firm. "I'm not your servant, and I'm not your boyfriend. I am your roommate and co-worker and I have no obligation to massage your feet, so could you please stop. You're acting like your five."
She sighed and slipped off of his shoulder and onto his legs, stomach down. "Yeeeaaa, alright. Sorry."
"You don't need to keep apologizing."
"Yea. Sorry." She straightened up. "I'm gonna go cool off in the shower." She gave him a kiss on the cheek before heading off to the bathroom.
As soon as he heard the bathroom door close, Kurohi's face turned so red he thought his skin would start melting. He really wished she wouldn't do things like that. He was extremely aware of the situation he was in. And to make it worse, she was getting more grabby by the day. He honestly didn't know how much more of this he could take before going insane. His occasional lunch breaks with Shibumi and Iruka felt like the only times he could get away from her, and even then she would still pop up in conversation.
"Kurohi! Can you grab me a change of clothes?"
Kurohi straightened up, a little confused as to how long he'd been sitting there. He got up, made his way to her room, grabbed a shirt, some pants, and blind-grabbed some underwear, before heading to the bathroom. He knocked once before turning his head away. He really didn't want to fan the flames at the moment.
The door creaked open and he felt her take the clothes from him. "Thanks."
"No problem. Anything else?"
"Nope, that's it."
Kurohi's stomach was getting loud enough to distract his brain from the dilemma at hand. Making diner sounded like a good idea, as it would give him something to get his mind off of the woman in the bathroom behind him.
"Hold on, Kurohi, this bra and panties don't match."
He stopped, resisted turning around. He could hear the pattering of her bare feet on carpet, and she was probably still in her towel. "Does it matter? It's not like anyone's going to see it."
"Eh, if I get drunk enough you might. Don't complain then, then."
"I'm gonna go make dinner." Even he could tell how rigid his voice sounded after that blow to the gut. All he knew was that he had to hide the beer as quickly as he could. If he had been in any other state, he probably would have noticed Erika's joyful little smile.
Linkmon had lost count of how many times he'd shooed off the waiter. He'd also lost track of how long he'd been sitting in the same booth. Since he wasn't human, he managed to escape the fate of a sore buttock. On the other hand, he could not escape the venomous tendrils of boredom that he was currently ensnared in. He was almost considering ordering a meal if only to have something else to wait for.
He couldn't help but think how bad his boredom must be to actually consider eating fake food as an alternative. Good Gob.
Even thou he hid it, Erika still managed to find the beer.
Using his impeccable 20-20 hindsight, he realized that the back of the freezer was probably not the best location. What was more, she couldn't seem to keep her hands off him; touching him every few seconds while talking to him in a mildly buzzed stupor.
"Hey, hey~" She poked his cheek. "You're not listening to me, are you?"
"You're talking directly into my ear. It'd be hard not to hear you."
She poked him again. "No, you're listening, but you're not listening. You, know."
Kurohi took a sip of water, knowing it would be a bad idea to drink harder than that. "I'm sorry if I haven't picked up on all the little intricacies about the arguments you've been having with your mom." She had been going on about her mother for the past ten minutes. "You're 28. The fact that you're so hung up on this is weird."
"It's because I'm 28 that it's a problem." She finished up her fourth can of beer. "She keeps fussing about how I'm single at my age, setting me up on these stupid marriage interviews, and I have to go to them, but I just end up turning them all down..."
"Baaack up a second." Kurohi's inner gears were turning. He remembered her mentioning being on dates at least once before, but as far as he knew, she hadn't gone out with anyone since he'd moved in with her. She had gone to visit her parents a few times, thou. "So all those times you went to visit your parents?"
"That'sh right!" She had another beer in hand. "Which is why I have a proposition for you, Kurohi." She put her arm around his shoulder and pulled him in so his head bounced off her chest. "I want you to go out with me." She held her beer out at arms length as thou she'd just announced a new scientific breakthrough.
Kurohi took a deep breath. The air seemed to revitalize some of his brain; dispersing the fog that had been building there all night. "Please explain."
"What's there to explain. My mom's been bugging me about getting a boyfriend, so I might as well go with you to get her off my back."
"So I'm just a way to get your mom off your back?" When you can hear venom, the bite was most likely fatal. All Kurohi's previous feelings of affection fueled turmoil suddenly dried up, leaving behind only the sludge of being really pissed off. He shrugged her off. "I'm going to bed."
"Wait, Kurohi!" She tried to go after him but stumbled.
He caught her on instinct. "You're drunk; you're not thinking straight, so I'm gonna say that it was just the alcohol talking, and put this behind me." He left her where she was and closed his door behind him.
Erika squatted down and rested her head on her knees. "Damnit. That's not what I...damnit."
It was almost morning, and Linkmon was still waiting. Giving in to his boredom, he got up and exited the cafe. The white walls of the internet were almost blinding after the beige interior that he'd been staring at for the past several hours. As he was wondering if fried chicken was a healthy breakfast, a voice called out to him.
"Leaving already? Aw, I only just got here."
Linkmon looked up to find the voice coming from a very familiar blue beetle.