Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush!

It's been a while, but you guys asked for this, so I finally updated this! I have an awesome plan for this story, but of course my main focus is Everlasting Feelings, but that'll be over soonish, so I can focus more on this when that is over, but i'll still write on this every few updates

Chapter 9

It's been a month and things have been pretty amazing actually. I've really gotten the hang of how things work and Kendall's restaurant, he even says that I'm like an old pro. I haven't seen or talked to Chad. I would be lying if I said I didn't think about him, but I sure as hell didn't miss him. There's only one thing that I'm not happy about being here.

Carlos. At first I wanted to deny it, but I have a strong attraction to Carlos that I can't shake and it makes me sad because we aren't anything but friends. We've gotten pretty close, but I want more from him. I know he has to feel the same way, but neither of us will make a move.

I walked out of the front door and got into Kendall's car. I was a little surprised when Kendall pulled away from the driveway.

"Aren't you going to wait on Carlos?" I asked.

"I gave him the day off, he has a meeting with a director to pick up a short film he wrote," Kendall smiled.

"Really?" I smiled. "That's awesome!"

"Yeah, so I don't want him to stress or anything so I just gave him the day off," Kendall said.

"Good plan," I chuckled. "I guess that means I'll have to work extra hard today without my partner huh?"

"Yeah," Kendall laughed. "By the way, I wanted to talk to you about something alone anyway."

"Something like what?" I glanced at him.

"Carlos," he said.

I glanced around nervously.

"What about him?" I asked.

"I know you like him," Kendall smirked.

I didn't say anything, I just blushed.

"Luckily for you, he likes you back," Kendall said.

"Really?" I looked at him. "He told you that?"
"He didn't have to," Kendall said. "You two have an unbelievable chemistry and James and I are actually betting on who will make the first move."

"I guess I can't deny it anymore," I said.

"Just make a move," Kendall suggested. "And don't be subtle. Carlos is so cuddly that he may not pick up on hints right away. Just one thing…"

"What?"

"Don't hurt him," Kendall said. "He's like my brother and I would hate for anything to happen to him. I know you probably wouldn't hurt him because you don't seem like that kind of guy, but I'm just saying."

"I won't," I said as we pulled up to the restaurant.

We both walked inside.

"Hey Logan," Donna smiled.

Carlos was right about her, she was the nicest, coolest one here. Her and I became quick friends.

"Hey Donna," I smiled back. "What's up today?"

"Not much, we had a small breakfast rush," she said. "After you clock in I've got to tell you a story from this morning,"

I nodded and went to the back to clock in, saying hey to everyone. I went back to hear about Donna's story, it turns out we had that occasion group with reckless kids and they left quite a mess. The waiters and waitresses don't think it's funny, but Donna and I do. You've gotta find your own entertainment in this business.

We had a pretty good day of customers, but we had a big rush during dinner time. I was running around like a chicken with my head cut off, but I actually enjoyed this part of the job. It kept me busy and improved my people skills so I liked it.

At the end of the day, I was tired, but it was still a good day. When we got in the car, Kendall looked just as tired as I did. He had to pick up everyone else's slack and take care of other business.

"So…since you were asking me about Carlos, I want to ask you some stuff," I said.

"Oh god," he chuckled.

"Have you had anybody?" I asked.

He sighed before glancing at me and then finally answering.

"Her name was Jo Taylor," Kendall said. "She was the first and only girl I've ever loved."

"What happened?" I asked quietly.

"She cheated on me with my friend Jett," Kendall said.

'Stetson?"

"Yeah," Kendall nodded.

"He wasn't always bad," I said. "I didn't know he was that type of guy."

"I didn't know she was that type of girl," Kendall said.

"Maybe we should stop talking about it," I suggested.

"It's fine, I'm over her now," Kendall assured me. "However, I forgot that we went to the same high school."

"I know, it seems like we should've known each other," I said.

"Well, now that I think about it, I saw you," Kendall said.

"Yeah, but I feel like we should've known each other personally. We hung out in the same crowd."

"Small world I guess," Kendall laughed.

We finally pulled up to the house and together we got out of the car and walked inside, finding James in the living room watching TV.

"Hey guys," James said, not taking his eyes from the TV.

"Hey, is Carlos here?" Kendall asked.

James nodded.

"And…?"

James actually broke his eyes away from the TV and shook his head sadly. Kendall frowned.

"He deserves this," Kendall said. "I don't understand why he can't make it."

"It takes time," James said.

"So, this has happened before?" I asked.

"Many times," James nodded.

"Well, is he any good?" I whispered, in case he was listening.

"He's amazing," Kendall said. "And I'm not just saying that because he's my friend."

"Yeah," James nodded. "He's passionate about it and he puts his heart on it."

"He stays up most of the night writing, I do know that," I said. "He won't let me read though."

"Oh, we sneak and do that," James said. "His laptop password is easy."

"Oh, well I'm going to go check on him," I said.

They nodded and I headed upstairs. I haven't talked to Carlos all day and I miss him…wow, this isn't good. I can't even go a day without seeing someone who I'm not even dating.

I knocked on the door softly before opening it, walking into a dark room.

"Carlos?" I said softly.

Even in the dark, I saw him on the bed, huddled up.

"What happened today?" I decided to ask.

"Nothing," he said softly. "They didn't want me."

"Aww Carlos," I frowned, sitting next to him on the bed. "I'm so sorry."

"I'll be fine, but I'm giving up on this," he said.

"You can't do that," I said.

"I can and I am," he said.

"But what about all the work you've done, all the schooling, all of the late nights writing and all of the pieces of paper around here with ideas?" I asked. "You have a degree, you can't give up."

"I just don't understand," Carlos said. "I don't think my writing is that bad."

"Carlos you should know that it takes time. No one gets it their first try," I said.

"I'm just tired of rejection and feeling like I'm getting nowhere," Carlos sighed. "It feels like I'm trapped in this circle of failure and I'm never going to get out."

I knew that he had some issue behind all of his happiness. It's funny, I was in this exact same position about a month ago.

"That's how I felt living with Chad, I lost everything, but you and I met and you and the guys have helped me in so many ways. I'm on the right track again. I have a job, I'm going to go back and finish my last year of school and I'm going to be a doctor."

"You can probably do that," Carlos nodded. "You're amazingly smart and you have that drive, but I've gotten my degree and now I just can't seem to get on the map."

"And that's the hardest part, but that doesn't mean you give up. I want you to use me as a motivation…come back harder every time this happens. Live like it's an opportunity for something better because I would hate to see you give it up. You're going to make it Carlos, please don't give up. Someone with your personality is perfect…you've just got to hold on a little longer," I said.

"Wow," Carlos smiled a little.

"What?" I looked at him.

"I like the real Logan," Carlos said. "Before, you would barely even look at us because you were so nervous, but you're here now giving me something to look forward to and making me feel better."

"I'm done hiding," I said. "After Chad, I'm not letting anyone else treat me that way."

"Thank you Logan," Carlos said. "I feel better. I won't give up."

"Good, now get up and keep writing on your big flick," I said.

"Okay, I said I wouldn't give up, but I'm kind of really tired Loges so can I keep working on it tomorrow?" Carlos asked.

"Fine," I chuckled. "It was a long day so I think I'll join you."

I changed into my pajamas and hopped into the bed next to Los. We stopped doing the whole cuddle thing a few weeks ago when it got a little warmer, but sometimes we still end up in that position because of the air conditioner.

I settled into bed and we lay in silence. I can always tell when Carlos is sleeping because he snores…quietly, but he snores.

"Logan?" he broke the silence.

"Yeah?"

"I know this may sound weird, but can you hold me?" Carlos asked. "I really need a hug right now."

I chuckled a bit before opening my arms. Carlos melted into my embrace and rested his head on my chest.

"I'm sorry if I'm bad at this," I said.

"You're warm," he said tiredly. "I like it."

I was actually freaking out on the inside because I learned after a month that I really like Carlos…like a lot and this isn't helping me one bit.

"Thanks for being such a good friend," was the last thing Carlos said before going to sleep.

Good friend…if only we were more.

Yes, the Cargan is slow, but soon...I promise just hang with me! I may have a new We Did it Chapter soon and deff a new Everlasting Feelings chapter soon!

Follow me on twitter at Rusher_Dallas, I follow back!

Question: Is there anything else about Carlos' past that could be an issue?

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