Belegorn and I left for the southern reaches of the forest nearly a week following. Thranduil had expressed even more growing concern for our abandoned city, and I had promised him to keep a closer eye on the area. Though – I worried to take our youthful and stubborn son to such a treacherous area. But I was required to, and he would have to face the evil in the world sometime in the darkening future.

It was as if the sun was dimming as we rode south, although I knew the sun could not be blamed. The trees were growing thicker, almost surreal, and were it not for the road I would not recognize my location, despite that we were very near where Thranduil and I had spent our younger days.

"Do you truly tell Legolas anything he wants to know, Mother?" Belegorn's voice cut into the stilted silence, and I let go of the breath I hadn't realized I was holding.

I looked at him sidelong, suspicious. "What exactly are you asking?"

"Father won't tell me of your family, and I am forbidden from studying Morgoth, and Sauron, and even of the old city."

I sighed. "He knows well to keep some things from you, Belegorn, and I have not delved into such evil topics with Legolas. To answer your question, I do answer anything he asks as best I can, but we rarely speak of the foul."

"Will you tell me?"

"Nooo…" If I were to be truthful, I did want to share some information with him, especially if Thranduil was not. But I could not go against him in such a way.

Meanwhile, Belegorn pouted, and the wind shifted. I noticed that the birds that flourished near our mountains halls had long since disappeared, and ominous clicking could be heard. I met the eyes of our guards, and saw that they were on edge as I was.

"I will tell you a story that I am sure Father will never share," I decided, to keep Belegorn from becoming too alert to our danger.

"Is it horrific?"

"Only horrifically embarrassing."

"Something that Father did?"

I smiled slyly, and his face brightened as I began. "I came to live in Greenwood when I was only slightly younger than you. Your father was barely older than I was, and his father - your grandfather - had us taking lessons together. Once we were sent to a small lake in the eastern reaches of the forest, which during the summer was teeming with flocks of birds of all different sorts. We sneaked away from our escort with part of our meal and tried feeding them. Father had a handful of bread that he was holding out to the birds, and they turned out to be quite eager for the victuals."

Belegorn was already beginning to laugh. "Did he get attacked?"

"Indeed – there was a monstrous duck that nearly ran at him, and he almost fell over in alarm. The duck snapped up the bread so fast that Father positively squealed!"

We giggled together for a moment, and then I continued. "I thought he was going to start crying! His lip started trembling and everything. When we returned to Amon Lanc and Father was telling the story to Grandfather, he swore to the old king that he had nearly lost his hand."

"What did you do? While he was getting attacked, I mean."

"I was laughing the entire time, and not very nicely. Father and I had a rather antagonistic relationship in those days."

Belegorn was quiet for a moment. "Why did you marry Father? He is so severe, but you are exultant."

"He hasn't always been that way," I said, wishing he had asked any question but that. Time had not dimmed my abhorrence of delving personal feelings. "When we were young, he was quite tender, not unlike Legolas. He changed after the war. Watching your kin die around you does that to a person."

"So you loved him before the war?"

I groaned inwardly. "No, I did not. I think I began to love him after he had been king for a few years. I was a bit wild in my youth, and Father wised up very fast once he was crowned. We had always been a team, we worked well together because we were so familiar with each other, and he loved me very much, even before the war."

I saw Belegorn open his mouth to ask more questions, but I decided to end it there, and turned to wink at him before declaring, "The kissing helped."

The poor boy made retching noises, and I bit my lip to keep from laughing. "My curiosity is sated," he avowed.

"That is very well," I said. "For I tire of answering silly questions."

The trip continued in silence. I did not stop my sweeping observations around us, and one of the guards would occasionally scout around for trouble. The trouble that finally did find us, however, was not something that could have been foreseen.

As I had been riding foremost, it was my horse that was the victim. She reared unexpectedly, nearly throwing me from the saddle, and screamed her terror. I dismounted quickly and spoke calming words as fast as I could to her, until Belegorn cried, "Mother! On your skirt!"

A quick look alerted all of our company to the danger, which was in the form of a massive brown spider, nearly the size of my hand, that had decided to take up residence on my dress. I had never particularly cared for insects, but this one just seemed malicious. I kicked it off and hurriedly stamped it to death without thinking.

"Uh oh," Belegorn said. "Father is not going to be happy." He was referring to the fact that Thranduil felt the deaths of all animals that took that course of life in the forest, but I doubted that he was in tune with such creatures as these. Looking at the shriveled corpse, I decided that this was no ordinary spider.

"Give me an empty sack," I ordered, kicking around the spider with the toe of my boot to make sure it was truly dead. I did not want it squirming around as we took it back to the king for his own verdict.

Once the dead bug was concealed and put away, the remainder of the journey to the post where we would be resting that night before continuing on to the post closest to Amon Lanc was quite humdrum. Belegorn wasted no time in telling me such.

"I thought this would be more exciting," he whined as we bunked down for the night in a small dwelling, removed from the guards.

"Today was more exciting than normal. The most unusual sight Legolas and I have seen while travelling was the white stag."

"The one that grants wishes if it's caught?"

"The very same."

"When I am king, I am going to catch it," Belegorn declared.

"If you would like," I said fondly, choosing not to tell him how many had hunted the stag and failed.

Belegorn fell into his rest easily that night, but I did not. The unearthly spider coupled with the gross foliage had my mind churning possibilities of what was happening to the forest. I could not stop wondering Sauron's part in all this – if he had taken a physical form, I knew that it would be obvious to all that dwelt under the sun. He could not have his full power as yet. Would he, one day? How would we drive him back this time, without the valor of Gil-galad and his like? We were so isolated in this forest, and what if Sauron attacked us here? We would not stand a chance, with no allies.

I began to shiver in the night air, and elected to pace outside to clear my mind. I was quite tired of my anxieties bearing down and ruining my rest.

The guards had apparently bunked down for the night, or fulfilled their watch from the trees rather than on the ground, so I was alone. The clearing for the camp took only a few minutes to pace across. I was so focused on not thinking of anything at all, that I jumped when I heard a noise behind me.

"My lady?"

I turned around to see Aiwendil standing at the edge of the clearing, leaning on his staff and looking at me with confusion.

"Why art thou so near the sickness?"

"Pardon?"

"The abandoned city – thou shouldst not go near it! It will infect thee."

It was my turn to be confused. "What do you mean?" I asked, wary.

"The shadows that move in the night, they inhibit the birds of the forest that dwell there. I have studied the infection and I fear it may begin to inhabit greater creatures, even the Firstborn."

"Has it thus far?" I asked.

"Not as yet."

"Then I shan't worry," I tried to appear unconcerned. "I am merely visiting the area to determine that the evil is contained within the fortress. I doubt I am in danger."

Aiwendil shook his head. "What would thy father say, with thee knowing the danger and doing nothing?"

Frustration boiled in me, and I stamped my foot furiously. "I do not know what my father would say, as I do not know him at all! But I will tell you what I say, wizard, and that is that my loyalty is to my husband and my king, not to my father that abandoned me as a babe!"

He stared at me, disbelief written on his face. "My child…" he stepped into the clearing to place a gnarled hand on my face. "Nienna has dealt thee a hard hand indeed, for thee to be burdened with such confusion and bitterness."

"Was there another message you intended to share?" I asked, angry at myself to letting my weakness show.

"Nay, my lady. I depart now, and hence to Council," Aiwendil bowed to me, and scurried into the dark forest, and soon I could not see his mottled cloak.

"Mother?" I heard a small voice, and turned to see Belegorn standing in the doorway of the hut, looking disheveled from sleep and completely baffled. "Who was that?"

I sniffed, and shook my head at him. "It is quite unimportant. You have other things to think about, tomorrow will be so exciting!"

His face brightened.

"Let's to bed," I told him, and entered the dwelling, steering him towards his own bed.

"May I sleep with you, Mother?" Belegorn asked. "That's why I woke – I was having the most awful nightmare, and I don't want to be alone."

"Of course," I said, and he brought his bedroll close to mine. He buried his face into my shoulder, and within seconds was snoring peacefully. Once I knew he was asleep, I let my tears fall freely, silently.