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~ Here There Be Monsters ~

Night time was always the best time for hunting and cities like Orlando had a never ending supply of prey. The hunter's favorite targets were those wandering out of the bars and night clubs after 3 AM. It made the chase less thrilling but the thrill of the kill never diminished. Using the foot of a crow as its talisman, the hunter waited for its prey among the branches of a palm tree outside a bar. It could take any animal form it wished as long as it had an item of it and sometimes wearing the pelt of the animal was not feasible as it called attention to the hunter's true identity. In a small pouch around its foot it carried its favorite weapon of choice against its victims.

The crow watched with anticipation as the lights were extinguished inside the bar and a group of drunken patrons staggered out the parking lot to their cars, awaiting taxis or they would stagger home on their own two feet and singled out its catch of the evening, a Caucasian male in his early forties, slender build with blond hair and blue eyes. The crow took flight, pursuing him down an alley. When the man stopped to urinate against the side of a building, the hunter shifted back into its true form. Seeing he was not alone, the man gasped and hastily zipped up his jeans.

"Oh shi…..didn't see you standing there."

"Of course you didn't," the hunter said coldly and stretched out her hand, blowing into it. A gray powder floated on the breeze and into the man's nostrils. He gasped for air and slid down the side of the building to the ground, convulsing violently; The hunter kneeled down and gazed into his terrified eyes and smiled a smile that chilled the blood.

"It's absolutely terrifying, isn't it….not having the ability to move or speak?" it taunted. "I suppose now you're thinking…what do you want with me or why are you doing this to me? The answer is quite simple…I enjoy it. About now your heart feels as if it is going to burst in your chest….but it won't. No, you'll just slowly wither away."

After several more minutes the man closed his eyes and breathed his last. The hunter stood up, changed its form again and started walking down the street, whistling the song "Cruella De Vil," from 101 Dalmatians. She found it amusing that she had her own theme song. Not all hunters had that luxury. Everyone in this world assumed she was just a character in books or movies. Oh, what they didn't know but it was this that kept that short little moron Detective Carlyle off her scent. Sooner or later they would come face to face and he would know how it felt to be the hunted.

She walked to where she'd parked her car and drove back to Disney World. A few sprinkles of a sleeping draught incapacitated most of the security guards. Others were too busy playing games on their phones or surfing the web for pornography.

Ah, the adult entertainment industry. Lowering the IQs of the human race point by point daily, she mused with a grin and unlocked the door to the toy store. She picked up a toy soldier on the shelf behind the counter and a panel in the wall opened, leading her down a flight of stairs to Rasputin's laboratory. He was sitting at his worktable reading a spellbook.

"Extracting the childrens' magical essence is not going to be easy," he said as a greeting.

"I didn't expect it to be but we will have it…and the bones of the child the blond woman carries. The corpse dust I will make from its remains will be stronger than any I've possessed before due to the child's special heritage."

"The children were not as receptive to me as I would have liked."

"How many times have I told you that you have a face that terrifies them?"

He glared at her.

"You need to work on your people skills Rasputin...and a makeover is highly recommended. Did wonders for me."

"I don't find you amusing."

"Of course you don't but I am useful to you...just as you have your uses for me."

"Very well. And how do you suggest I make myself more...friendly to children?"

"These ones will be more difficult to deceive, especially the disabled one. He is the strongest of them...surely you sensed it."

"That and something else...an old soul..." the sorcerer murmured.

"Hmmm...an adult taking child form...interesting but rarely done as the mage's mind regresses into a child's unless they have some sort of talisman to help them retain adult memories."

"If he does indeed have a talisman, we will need to take it in order to keep him trapped in child form," Rasputin said.

The souls of the children they'd already taken would be enough to sustain them for now.

Four excited children burst through the door to Bae and Emma's room early the next morning.

"C'mon get up! We wanna go to Disney!" Regina shrilled. Rumple climbed onto the bed and started jumping up and down while Belle tried to pull the covers off the couple. Killian stood at the foot of the bed with a bucket of ice water ready.

"Guys! Guys, knock it off! What did you do, ingest a truck of sugar or what?" Bae grouched.

"Bae, we wanna go to Disney today," Rumple pleaded.

"I know but it's not time for the park to open yet and we need to get some breakfast first."

"Can't we sleep a bit longer?" Emma moaned. She'd barely gotten any sleep the night before, unable to find a position comfortable enough but even after she gave birth she knew she would still have trouble sleeping with an infant in the house.

"You go ahead hon. I'll deal with this," Bae said softly. "All right guys, let's go get something for breakfast and let Emma sleep a little bit. She's tired."

"Cause of the baby. I 'member Bae," Rumple said. "We gotta be quiet an let Emma sleep," he told the others and put a finger to his lips. They nodded their heads in agreement, not wanting Emma to be mad at them.

Henry was already awake and watching his Walking Dead DVD on the big screen when the kids walked into the living room. Killian hopped onto the sofa beside him.

"What's this one, Henry?"

"Never you mind," he said with a grin and turned it off, switching the channel to Boomerang instead.

"Aww c'mon Henry, I wanna watch the zombies get wasted!"

"Yeah well do you want Dad to kick my butt?"

"Umm...no..."

"Okay then. You gotta watch Scooby Doo."

Bae turned on the television in the dining room so that the kids could watch the cartoon while they ate. Rumple was watching Shaggy and Scooby have yet another snack, frowning.

"Musta smoked too much weed. Shaggy's hungry again."

Henry spit out his milk.

"G...Rumple! Shaggy doesn't smoke weed!"

"Uh-huh. S'why he hasta eat all the time. Druggie with the munchies."

"Rumplestiltskin Gold, where did you hear that?" Bae asked, trying to hold back his own laughter as he remembered his father as an adult saying something similar.

"It's on the 'puter," the little sorcerer said.

"He don't smoke weed, he's just lazy," Belle argued.

"Nope. He's a doper," Rumple refuted.

Belle glared at him. "Oh yeah? You gots evidence, Mister Bigshot Lawyer?"

"Yeah...when they was shootin' the movie, they put stuff with him smoking weed in it an cut it."

"I'll never be able to look at Shaggy the same way again!" Henry laughed.

"'Sides, there's a thing 'bout it in Newsweek," Rumple went on. "'Mong other stuff like what was Daphne an Fred doin when they'd go clue huntin? Betcha it wasn't huntin clues."

"Oh...my God!"

A crash was heard from the doorway as Archie dropped his glass of orange juice.

"An they think Velma kinda had a thing for Daphne," Rumple added.

"Huh? Where you see that? They're buddies," Regina wanted to know.

"Lotsa people who watch it saw it."

"Ooookay….enough about that!" Bae turned on the news to see the weather forecast.

"...Another body was discovered today a few blocks from the bar where the victim was last seen alive...Police have yet to issue a statement but sources claim..."

Bae quickly changed the channel. The four children turned their heads in his direction.

"People are getting killed?" Rumple asked worriedly.

"Rumple, what if it's a zombie attack...or the black goo!? We gotta put our cones an magnatite on so's they can't get us!" Killian whimpered.

"Guys, calm down...no one's going to hurt you. They'd have to get through us first," Bae said fiercely.

He motioned for Archie to go into the living room with him. The therapist crossed his arms over his chest and glowered at his assistant.

"There something you want to tell me?"

Bae repeated everything he read in the paper about the deaths, the missing children and seeing the same detective from the airport in the hotel.

"I know my father is more than a match for anyone who might want to hurt him but we can't let any of them out of our sight for a minute."

"I know but we want to be careful they don't see any more news reports, Bae. They're already terrified."

"I know Archie."

They returned to the dining room. The kids finished their breakfast and returned to the living room to watch cartoons with Henry. Emma woke up an hour later. Belle was eager to go to story time, Killian wanted to meet Jack Sparrow, Henry wanted to go on every roller coaster ride in the park while his father told him to keep a supply of vomit bags handy. Regina wanted to see the Evil Queen and Rumple was just happy to be with Bae and his friends.

"You gonna see Selene today Archie?" Belle quizzed the therapist during the ride to the park.

"Umm….yes. She said she wanted to meet me for lunch…" he said nervously.

Rumple studied his outfit, nodding with approval. "You oughta wear blue more often Archie 'stead of that crap the looks like ya got it at a yard sale in the 70s." He was wearing another blue dress shirt with black slacks along with one of Rumple's Ferragamo ties.

"An what's that stuff ya got on? S'not Axe. Axe makes the girls really chase ya." Killian pointed out.

"I tried it on him. He said it made him gag," said Henry.

"Ya don't need fancy smelling stuff to make her like you. Don'cha listen to that," Belle said. "All you gotta do is be yourself...really sweet."

Rumple cocked his head. "That an' use Brut cologne," he informed the therapist. "It's nice and doesn't make you want to pass out."

"Ooo that what you have on now?" Belle sniffed Rumple's collar.

"Uh huh. Bae let me use some."

"That's what I have on too." Archie said.

"You gonna get some leg tonight for suuureee!" Killian sang.

"Killian Gold!" Emma exclaimed.

Henry almost choked on the Pop Tart he was eating.

"S'what David Lee Roth says!"

Archie was blushing.

Emma glared at Bae. "Did you forget to reshuffle your iPod again, Baelfire?"

Bae spread his hands. "Em, I do have my own playlist and I'm not gonna just put Sesame Street tunes on it!"

He leveled a stern finger at his son. "You better quit snooping around and touching what doesn't belong to you, mister, or else somebody's gonna have time out and a sore butt."

"Like Van Halen!" he cried. "M' hot for teacher!" he sang.

"Jailbait!" Regina muttered.

Bae facepalmed himself. "Oh, God! Sometimes I think I'm talking to a wall."

Rumple smirked. "Sounds familiar."

Now Bae wondered how he'd survived to fourteen. I was lucky and never knew just HOW lucky.

"Thank God my phone has nothing like that on it," Archie sighed.

"All you bad bad boys call her up on..."

Henry started laughing so hard he choked and Bae had to swat him on the back.

"Killian Gold if you sing the rest of that you ARE gonna have a sore butt!" Emma threatened.

"Call her up on what?" Belle was curious.

"Betcha its one a those 900 hundred numbers with Miss Hobag and the Heavy Breathing Band," answered Regina.

"Yup. Press one to have 50 Shades," Rumple nodded.

Emma almost passed out. "How the HELL-Bae, my God!"

Bae was wondering if he should start digging his grave.

"How do ya know that, Rumple?" Belle asked, giving him a scowl.

Regina smirked. "Yeah inquirin minds wanna know. You cheatin on Belle with Miss Skanky Undies?"

"A wrong number called Grandpa's shop one day," Henry put in. "I was there when he picked it up."

Archie was chuckling while he was sending a text.

Killian leaned over. "You sexting Selene?"

The therapist was so shocked he almost dropped his phone. "What?! No!"

"Kid! You're pushing it!" Bae warned. "One."

"Kay, Kay, I'll quit it!" Killian pouted. He knew if his father got to three his backside would be sore.

"Are we there yet?" Belle demanded impatiently.

"Good idea, bro," Rumple agreed. All of them knew they were on very thin ice if Bae started counting.

Emma was waiting for Bae to pull the rental car over.

"Guys, don't make me pull this car over," her husband growled.

"But I wanna see Belle an have story time!"

Archie was learning one thing quickly on this vacation. You needed the patience of a saint when dealing with children.

"And I want a stiff drink," Bae muttered. "Make that two of 'em! Wonder who's gonna get what they want."

"Bae! You don't drink and drive!" Rumple yelped.

"Yeah cause you'd wreck an kill someone else an then you'd go to jail!" Belle yelled.

"God grant me patience . . ." he groaned. He'd forgotten his father had ears like a proverbial cat in long grass. "I never said I was going to have a drink now. Now hush before your chatter drives me insane and I DO crash."

All of the adults were relieved when they arrived at the park. While they were walking, a man dressed as Gaston approached them. "Hello there!" he greeted.

"Hiya!" Killian waved.

"That's Gaston, Killian! He was mean to the beast an tried to kill him so he fell off the roof of the castle an now he's a Gastoncake!" Belle exclaimed.

Rumple scowled. "Yup! Cause villains don't get happy endings!"

Gaston smiled at the toddler. "You're pretty smart. Big Beauty and the Beast fan?"

"Yeah . . .she memorized the movie," Regina put in.

More like she IS the movie! Henry thought, humming the Gaston song.

"What was your favorite part?"

"Mine was when the Beast and Belle danced in the ball room," Rumple interjected.

"You didn't like the fight scene?"

"Oh I did . . .but you asked what my favorite part was . . and that was it . . cause it showed that Belle really accepted the Beast and loved all of him," Rumple replied. "My second favorite part was when you got shoved off the roof."

Gaston laughed. "I think I fell though..."

"You ended up dead so it's all the same," the little pawnbroker pointed out.

"So why don'cha look like a pancake?" Belle asked.

"That would be a bit scary honey. I have to look nice so I don't scare anybody."

"Do you wear Axe?" Killian wanted to know. "Cause if you do it won't matter what you look like, all the girls would come running."

"Ummm...yeah...but..." He looked away.

"Can I die now?" Emma groaned. "I have a three year old nympho!"

"So are you mean to the beast like in the movie?" Rumple asked.

"No...we're...ahhh...really good friends." Gaston winked at the toddler.

Bae's eyes went wide, knowing what the wink meant. And he knew Rumple would too . . .his papa was no dumb bunny even at three. He quickly picked up Rumple and said, "See, they're one big happy family, guys! Nice to meet you, Gaston. C'mon, let's go over and see Belle's storytime!"

"Hey we weren't done!" Killian protested.

Selene met up with them before they went in. "Hi everybody. Having a good time?"

"Yeah...Selene didya know Gaston likes the beast...like as a boyfriend?"

Her mouth dropped open. Jason, the man who played Gaston never said anything about his sexual preference around children. He knew he would get reprimanded and possibly fired.

"Ummmm...why do you think that?"

"Cause when we was talkin about it he winked at me an said they was really good friends an I know that's what he means."

"Well...ahhhh..." She glanced over at Archie and the boy's parents.

"Isn't he a bit young to know about that?" she whispered to Archie.

"These kids...they...know quite a bit for their age..." Archie said.

Her eyes narrowed. "I see...well...I suppose you're going to storytime with Belle?"

"Uh-huh. You wanna sit with us, Selene?"

Belle smiled at her. "You can sit with Archie an hold his hand an stuff."

She wanted to strangle the witch telling the stories while she was at it and though she was starting to like Doctor Hopper, quite a bit, they weren't ready for hand holding yet.

Disney's Belle, whose name was Lacey, barely made it to story time on time that day. She'd been out all night, not even stopping at her apartment to take a shower and her costume had been stuffed into a bag in the backseat of her car.

Selene snorted. "The fleet's in," she muttered.

Archie gasped. "Selene!"

"Belle, that Belle looks kinda scruffy," Regina observed.

"Prolly just tired."

"Okay kids, I'm going to tell you the story of Beauty and the Beast," Lacey said. She would have preferred to be at home sleeping off her hangover but she'd already missed work too many times and would be fired if she had one more unexcused put on her best smile and started the story. She told it so many times she could recite it in her sleep but she didn't enjoy it at all. "...And then the Beast turned into a handsome prince and they lived happily ever after."

"Why'd he hafta become a prince?" Belle asked. Lacey stared at her as if she were insane.

"Because she couldn't love a beast."

"Yeah she could!" Belle argued. "Did ya even WATCH the movie! She fell in love with the BEAST...not Good Looks No Brains!"

Rumple chuckled from his seat.

"I did watch the movie," Lacey answered sarcastically.

"When she kissed the beast an he turned into the prince she didn't even know who he was an I still think she didn't really like him as the prince cause he got dumb!"

"Okauy, that's enough Belle," Emma said sternly. Little smartass, she thought.

Belle glared at Lacey. "So's you think you can only get a happy ending if you got good looks huh?"

"Who'd want to marry the beast?" Lacey countered.

"I would!" Belle yelled.

The other children laughed. "Yeah that'd be an interesting marriage!"Lacey snorted.

"The REAL Belle would love the beast not a dumbutt!"

Lacey rolled her eyes. "Not in fairytales honey!"

"Well they need to be retole an you's a disgrace to the Belle name. What'd you do...crawl outta bed in your clothes?"

"More like the backseat of a car," Selene giggled, enjoying seeing Lacey being knocked off her pedestal by a toddler.

"Selene!" Archie hissed.

"Okay we're leaving!" Bae said and grabbed Belle.

As they were walking out Rumple turned around. "In the real fairytale, dearie...the beast gets the girl!"

He smirked and left her standing there stunned.

Henry hi fived Belle once they were outside. "Boy did you give it to her good!"

"Made me mad," the little librarian huffed.

"Yeah she was really dumb an she looked like she didn't take a bath. Gross. Walking germhead."

Rumple grimaced.

"Not gonna be hot for her. I'd get crabs or somethin," Killian muttered.

Emma groaned. Bae shook his head. "Killian..."

"What's crabs gotta do with-"

"Never mind M...Regina," Henry saidf quickly.

"You know you'd win a fortune if you put this lot on the telly," Selene joked to Archie.

"No thank you...we'd probably be banned from every station for life."

"Bae I gotta use the potty!" Rumple cried.

"Dad, I'll take him. I gotta go too," Henry said, holding out his arms to take his toddler grandpa.

"Okay guys. Meet us right here."

"We'll be back," Henry grinned, imitating Arnold. He hurried off to the men's restroom a few yards from where they were.

Rasputin couldn't believe his luck. The boy was there along with the preteen mage. Their auras were the strongest but the younger boy...he still believed he was under a regression spell.

Henry set Rumple down. "Okay buddy. You need any help with the buttons?"

He focused on the younger mage trying to asses his abilities but the young mage had some sort of cloaking spell on him.

It was an ability he should not have at such a young age.

The older boy was a novice, just learning the craft and could not cloak his abilities well enough.

"No, I'm good," Rumple replied, and then both of them used the facilities. It was when they were washing their hands that Rumple felt eyes on him-unfriendly probing ones.

The little boy turned to see the creepy man from the toy shop fixing him with an innerving stare . . .one that was almost predatory. The little boy backed up into Henry. "Hey! What are you lookin' at me like that for, you pervert?" he queried defensively. "You been in the slammer yet for molesting kids or what, you creep?" Something about the man was making his flesh crawl, and all his instincts were screaming at him that here was a dangerous predator, not the ordinary older man he appeared.

"Now that wasn't polite," Rasputin said calmly though inside he was seething

"Then quit lookin' at my butt!" the child growled, his hand fastening on Henry's.

He wanted to rip out the boy's soul then and there but it was not the right time. It could only be done during the full moon.

Henry quickly picked up Rumple. One glance at the man and he got the heebie jeebies too. There was something . . .eerily WRONG about this man.

"Rude child! Has no one taught you to respect your elders?"

"Hey, cool it, mister! He's not being mean, he's not good with strangers," Henry defended.

"He needs to learn to be," the magician said coldly.

The child was clever, he'd give him that. Perhaps Cruella would have better luck.

Henry half-turned, shielding the little boy from the other's cold gaze. "Not with the amount of sicko people around these days," he retorted. "C'mon, let's go back to Mom and Dad, okay?"

"Kay!" Rumple buried his face in the older boy's shoulder.

Henry made an almost infinitesimal motion with his finger and thumb, activating a certain protection spell taught to him by his grandfather.

Rasputin returned to the shop to wait for her. She flew in the window in her bird form and the two of them retreated to his basement to discuss the next phase of their plan.

If Selene played her part the children's guard would be down around Cruella.

"Everything okay?" Emma asked when the boys returned.

"There was some creepy pervert in the bathroom," Rumple reported. "And I swear he was lookin' at my butt like it was a sandwich!"

"What? Who?" Bae growled.

"Didja kick him in the nuts Henry?" Regina asked.

"It was that guy from the toy store," Henry replied. "I didn't like how he was looking at us either. Told us that Rumple didn't have no manners. I told him that wasn't true, and then I got the heck outta there."

Belle shivered.

Selene frowned. "That sounds like Grigori...he scares all the children."

"Next time I'm going with you," Bae said firmly. He shook his head angrily. What was the world coming to these days when two kids couldn't even go to the bathroom without worrying about some sick fuck?"

"What do you know about this man, Selene?" Archie asked.

"I don't know all that much Archie except that he's not well liked at all."

"Bae, he made me feel all dirty," Rumple whimpered, still feeling the effects of the other's aura like pond scum on his skin. He went and grabbed his son around the legs.

Bae cuddled Rumple, murmuring, "Don't worry, buddy. I'll kill him if he touches you." He knew enough about dark practitioners to know that some favored hurting and sacrificing small children above all . . .and anyone that caused such a reaction in Rumple, who was sensitive to others' auras, was someone to be wary of.

"I can see why!" Emma exclaimed. "If I wasn't pregnant he'd be getting his ass kicked!"

"Go Mom!" Killian hooted. "Lay the smackdown on him!"

"Wanna hit him an that mean Belle with books!" snarled Belle.

"Yeah, dearie! Or beat his butt with ma cane a doom!" Rumple agreed, then he waved his cane and nearly hit Bae with it.

"Wanna turn him into a worm an squish him!" said Regina.

Selene laughed. "Your friends never fail to amuse me Archie!"

Bae laughed. "Sometimes they're a real trip. You never know what they'll come out with next."

Belle pointed to the Beauty and the Beast teacup ride. "Rumple, look! It's Chip n' Mrs. Potts ride! Let's go on it!"

Emma looked and shook her head. "You go with 'em, hon. Just looking at it is making me green."

"Yes, dearie," Bae teased then he went to get online with Belle and Rumple. Since they had the Fast Passes, they didn't need to wait in an endless line, but got on after five minutes.

Killian made a face. "Wanna go see Jack Sparrow now!"

"Hold your horses, kid! He's coming up," Emma told him. "How about we get some Italian ice over there?" she pointed to where there was a vendor selling Italian ices and cold drinks with souvenir cups.

"Do they got apple?" questioned Regina.

"Let's go and see," Emma said, her throat was dry in the Florida heat. She took Killian and Regina's hands and they went over to the ice cart.

"I want blueberry!" Killian said.

"Hey, Mom! Get me a chocolate, please!" Henry called.

Emma found they had many interesting kinds of ice, including Red Delicious Apple, Chocolate Coconut, and Raspberry Sweet Tea.

She got Killian a blueberry, Regina an apple, and herself a lemonade flavor, since lately she craved sweet and tart things. She got Henry, Bae, and Rumple a chocolate and Belle the raspberry sweet tea one.

The others were done riding the teacups when the ice was ready. While they were eating they spotted the fake Belle walking past them, eying Bae.

She strutted over to the vendor and ordered herself some ice, keeping her eyes on Bae.

"Why's she starin at Bae like she wants to eat him?" Belle mused.

Emma was ready to pluck her eyes out with her spoon.

"She's a tramp," Rumple began singing the song from Lady and the Tramp that Peg sings in the pound, it was about Tramp, but he knew it could apply to the fake Belle too.

"Whoa here she comes. Watch out boy she'll chew ya up. Whoa here she comes. She's a maneater!" Killian sang.

Henry spit out some of his ice.

"Dad you got Hall and Oates on your iPod?"

"No."

"Archie gots it on his an he was singing it one day when Dad took me there while he worked."

Selene glanced at her date, a grin on her face. He looked away, not wanting people to know he sang when he was alone.

"Who let the dogs out?" Belle sang and looked right at Lacey as she went by.

"You guys are killing me!" Henry laughed.

Gonna make me pee my pants, Emma thought, and lately it didn't take much for her to do that. She put her arm possessively around Bae and glared at the other woman. He's taken, bimbo! Now find your own man! was what she wanted to say.

"Better hurry Lacey before somebody gets your street corner!" Selene cat called quoting a famous JR Ewing line from Dallas.

"Burned!" Rumple crowed, and made the hand motions of an airplane crashing into his other hand.

"Limey bitch!" Lacey hissed. "Only man you can get is a four eyed, balding old bastard!"

"Excuse me?" Archie gasped.

"Watch who you're callin' old, tart cart!" Rumple spat. "Cause you knew Jesus in third grade!"

Selene threw her drink in the other woman's face. "At least he's not the bloody seventh fleet!"

"An' your implants are sagging!" Regina called sassily.

Henry high-fived her.

"Better scratch your crabs too cause they prolly itch!" Killian taunted.

Jason, the park's Gaston stood with the Beast, both of them applauding.

Regina gestured and Lacey's skirt blew up over her head.

"Really, dearie?" Rumple hooted mockingly. "I've seen more attractive hippos!"

"Please don't wear that thoooonnggg!" Killian sang.

"Yep, a 'sgrace to the Belle name!" Belle murmured.

"She gives cats a bad name," Rumple snorted.

Lacey ran off screaming.

"That was the funniest thing I've seen in a month of Sundays," the Beast said to Jason. His name was Rich. "Dissed by four kids barely out of diapers."

"We're the Nevengers. We kick butt an take names!" Rumple declared.

"Yup! And that's the way the cookie crumbles!" Regina smirked.

"Hope you guys stick around. Liven the place up a bit," Jason said.

"We'll be here for awhile," Bae said.

"Can we go see Jack Sparrow now?" Killian demanded.

"I'll see you all back at the hotel," Archie said softly.

Belle elbowed Rumple in the ribs.

"Hope Pongo says she's nice."

Rumple and Belle wanted to go to the Animal Kingdom. Henry and Emma took them there while Bae took Killian and Regina to the Pirates of the Caribbean adventure. The three of them sat in a small boat that navigated through various sets depicting pirate themes. They traveled through a battle with Barbossa on the sea, a bride auction, a town being sacked and spotted Jack sitting on a chair singing A Pirate's Life For Me.

"Dad, there's Jack. HEY JACK!" Killian shouted, trying to stand up in the boat until Bae made him sit back down. Then the little pirate looked closer. "That's not the real Jack. That's a DUMMY!" he yelled.

"How can ya tell?" Regina asked.

"Cause he's talkin' like Johnny an Jonny ain't here. Just movin his mouth like some a those singers do cause they can't sing live."

Killian crossed his arms over his chest. "Didn't come here to see no stupid dummies!"

Well, today has been interesting, Bae thought. Disney's Belle is a ho, Jack Sparrow is a dummy...Gaston and the Beast are boyfriends...what's next?

Killian was still pouting when they met up with Emma and the others at the Animal Kingdom. Oddly enough the same detective from the airport was there talking to a member of the staff.

"We're going to need a copy of the security recordings from last night," he was telling the girl.

She nodded quickly, trying to avoid any of the guests hearing their discussion.

"I don't like this Emma," Bae whispered to her.

"Me neither," she admitted.

Even the children were uneasy now.

"What's goin' on?" Rumple looked from Emma to Bae worriedly. His "trouble radar" was going off like mad.

"I don't know."

Emma moved forward so that she could hear more of the conversation.

"When you locked up for the night both the lion and tiger were accounted for?" Detective Carlyle asked.

"Yes sir. But this morning...both were gone."

"Didja hear that...one a the tigers n'lions are missing!" Regina whispered to the others.

"Where could they go, without being seen?" Rumple mused. "Maybe somebody stole 'em?"

"Eww what if somebody stole em for their coats. Need to 'vestigate, " Belle insisted.

Rumple sighed. "An' how we gonna do that, dearie? You know how Emma n' Bae are 'bout us doin' that."

"Jus gotta be careful," the little librarian said with a smile.

"Hey Rumple, you think maybe you can make those cones tell us what they're sayin?" Killian asked him.

"They's 'sposta protect us from the black goo mind readin aliens," Rumple reminded him. "An Bae doesn't like us usin magic in public."

"So do it where he can't see it," Regina stepped in front of him along with Belle and Killian. "You make em an we'll make sure Bae doesn't see."

"Guys, what're you doing?" Henry asked.

"Some 'vestigatin. You're the lookout!" Regina informed him.

"Why do I have to be the lookout?"

"Cause I said so, that's why!"

Henry threw up his hands in defeat. When his mother was determined to do something, she just did it no matter what age she was. Even his curiosity had been aroused hearing about the missing animals in the park and his and Rumple's eerie encounter with the toy shop owner was too much of a coincidence. Something wasn't right in the Magical Kingdom and it was up to them to find out what it was. The novice sorcerer was beginning to suspect there was some form of dark magic at work.

Rumple finished the hats, disguising them so that they looked like they were made of newspaper and passed them out to everyone. As soon as they put them on they could hear the conversation between the park employee, Bae, Emma and the detective who was trying to reassure the couple that they had nothing to be worried about. Bae pulled him aside.

"Don't give me that. I saw the stories in the paper about the dead bodies and the missing kids! What the hell are you doing about it?"

"We're working around the clock, Mr. Gold," Carlyle assured him. The last thing he needed was a civilian involving himself in a police investigation. All it would do was put him and his family at risk or spook the killer enough to leave town before being captured.

"Whoa...people gettin killed an kids missing! I bet that creepy toy guy is doin that!" Rumple exclaimed. "Henry we gotta tell that 'tective so's he checks him out!"

"Good idea." Henry walked over to the two men. "Dad, what's going on?" he asked nonchalantly, his eyes never leaving his grandparents, brother and mother.

"Nothing...what is that on your head?" Bae scowled. What were those kids up to now?

"Just some hats Rumple made," he answered.

"I did something like that when I was a lad," Detective Carlyle laughed.

"Henry, this is Detective Carlyle."

The two of them shook hands. "Dad, did you tell him about that guy creeping me and Rumple out in the bathroom earlier?"

Carlyle frowned. "You saw something suspicious, lad?"

"Yeah." Henry proceeded to tell him what he and Rumple experienced, leaving out anything having to do with magic but what he recounted was enough to make the detective angry.

"I'll certainly look into it, Henry. Thank you."

"Please do. He terrified Rumple," Emma said and the couple returned to where the kids were waiting. They decided to finish their tour of the Animal Kingdom then head back to the hotel since Emma was starting to feel tired. When they got back there was a note from Archie telling them he and Pongo were at Selene's house for dinner.

"Good. Now we can find out if she's good 'nough for Archie and hopefully that cop's gonna take the creepy toy guy to jail!" Belle said angrily.

Archie was nervous when they pulled into the driveway of Selene's apartment building. She'd only told him a few minutes earlier that her mother was going to be joining them. he was already worried about messing up being alone with her but now he had to make a good impression on her mother too. Thankfully Pongo was with him to provide some comfort but he knew Pongo would be too distracted by Selene's dog to worry about him.

Cricket, you're on your own. Try not to screw up this time.

His last date ended with him having to pay an expensive dry cleaning bill for spilling wine on his date's dress because his hands were shaking.

Pongo heard another Dalmatian barking when Selene turned the key in the lock and found himself nose to nose with a beautiful female.

Who are you? she barked at him.

My name is Pongo. I'm here with my human, he barked back.

My name is Perdy. She sniffed him. I'll warn you though...you and your human make my mistress unhappy and I'll bite holes in both your backsides!

You don't need to worry about that. My human is a good man. He's just looking for a mate.

Perdy snorted. So I suppose that means you are too, eh?

Well…

Never mind. Perdy circled around Archie and sniffed his hand when he held it out for her and patted her head. All right Pongo, your human seems fine.

"She's beautiful, isn't she Pongo?" Archie whispered to his pet.

"Woof!"

"He's been wonderful so far Perdy," Selene was saying to hers. "And Pongo is so much like you. I think you'll like him too, don't you?"

Perdy didn't answer. She simply sat back and observed her mistress's date and his dog interacting with each other pleased to see that they shared as close a bond as she and Selene did.

"Selene! Darling…..open the door!" they heard a female voice screech from the other side. Perdy growled.

Who strangled the cat? Pongo asked her.

Your human seems nice enough but let's see how he handles the real test….her!

Who is she? Selene's mother?

Yes.

I take it you don't get along?

Find out for yourself.

Archie wiped his sweating hands on his pants when Selene opened the door to admit a tall silver haired woman in her seventies with shopping bags draped over her arms and wearing so much jewelery she could've opened her own shop. She stopped in her tracks when she saw him.

"Well, he doesn't look like a fugitive from the fashion police now, does he?" she asked.

"Mum!" Selene cried.

"You must be Mrs. Paddington. I'm Archie Hopper." Archie held out his hand. Instead of shaking it, the woman put her holder with a lit cigarette in it.

"Be a love and hold that for me would you?"

Archie grimaced, trying not to cough as the smoke filled his nostrils. He despised cigarettes and didn't allow anyone to smoke around him, even Geppetto. His friend had to go outside when he needed a smoke break.

"Mum, dammit!" Selene snatched the cigarette holder out of his hand and thrust it back at her mother. "Don't be difficult!"

See what I mean? Perdy said to Pongo. She does this to every man Selene brings home. Behaves atrociously and never gives them a moment alone.

Reminds me of some of Archie's previous dates. They didn't have mothers that were difficult, they were difficult.

Archie sat down on the sofa while Selene excused herself to talk to her mother in the kitchen. He was surprised when both dogs jumped up to sit with him. Pongo put his head in Archie's lap while Perdy was content to have him give her back a scratch and she was pleased when he found just the right spot.

That was how Selene found them when she returned to the living room.

"Mother's going to cook tonight," she said. "I apologize, Archie. She can be a bit….eccentric."

"Oh, it's all right."

Perdy moved to make a place for her mistress to sit beside him.

So does my human pass your test, Perdy?

If he stays around, yes.

In the kitchen, Carla Paddington...it had been years since she was able to call herself Cruella De Vil, smiled deviously. She may have overplayed her hand a bit but the fool was still sticking around along with his mutt. She would have to be a bit more charming in the future if she wanted him to bring those children to them.

Archie was used to difficult people. He had a least a dozen patients who were and there was no one he deemed more difficult than the old Regina. He was grateful she wasn't like that anymore but in spite of her mother's antics, he did enjoy spending the evening with Selene and Perdy. After dinner humans and dogs sat on the sofa again to watch a movie while Carla read a fashion magazine but in her mind she was sketching a new puppy coat. She only hoped she didn't have to wait too long for those mutts to produce the material she needed.

"I had a wonderful time," Archie said to Selene when she dropped him off at the hotel later that evening.

"I'm sorry about Mum…"

"It's fine. My parents were a bit…difficult too."

"I only work a short shift tomorrow. Maybe we could have lunch?" Selene suggested.

"I'd like that. Goodbye Perdy." He waved to the Dalmatian poking her head out the window of Selene's car.

"Woof!"

Pongo raced over to the car and jumped up, rubbing noses with the other Dalmatian then licked the side of her face. Their owners laughed.

"Kissing on the first date, Pongo?" Archie teased.

"Woof!"

Unlike you slow humans, we dogs know who our mates are right away.

"I'll meet you at the entrance around eleven," Selene said softly.

"Good night, Selene," Archie murmured and led Pongo back into the hotel unaware that four little children had been watching them from the balcony.

"Awww! Why didn't he kiss her?" Belle complained.

"Cause you can't on a first date," Rumple told her.

"Pongo kissed Perdy so that means Selene's cool!" Killian was grinning.

"Let's see what Pongo tells us first," Regina reminded them.

The children made a mad dash for their beds before Archie returned to the room but Pongo, sensing Rumple was still awake sought him out in the room he shared with Killian to give him a full report on the evening, not liking what he was hearing about Selene's mother one bit. The dog sensed there was something about her that endangered both his human and Perdy's.