Da Qiao
One day, Da Qiao told Sun Ce that she was going to paint a portrait of him and needed some time alone because she didn't want him to see it until it was done. He left the house and told her that he would be back in a couple of hours. She nodded her head and went back inside her room. She began painting and got a good start. In a couple hours, she got everything painted except for the face. She was about to paint his eyebrows when she heard something.
"Ade due Damballa," said a voice from under her bed. She got really scared and stopped painting. "Give me the power I beg of you!"
"Ahhhhh!" she screamed, standing up and accidently knocking over the brown paint onto the face of Sun Ce's portrait. She picked it up really quick and ran out of the house while screaming. She rode a horse to her parent's house, which was five miles away. From underneath her bed, "Da Qiao" crawled out with an evil smile on "her" face. "She" walked to the portrait and thought of an idea while laughing.
"He he he haaaaa ha ha ha ha," "she" laughed. "She" picked up the paintbrush and did something to it while cracking up. After "she" was finished laughing at it, "she" found Sun Ce in the palace up ahead.
"Hey Da Qiao," said Sun Ce. "Are you done with my portrait?" "She" smiled and nodded "her" head.
"Yes I am, my lord," "she" replied. "It's a surprise. Go look at it now. I'll be at my parent's house."
"Okay," he said, as they kissed and departed. (To be continued with Sun Ce)...
Ding Feng
Gan Ning
Gan Ning is by far the number one thief in all of China. He is a pirate that sails village to village, seeking the biggest treasures of all time. He had stolen the imperial seal, jewelries, gold, armors, and weapons from important officers. He was bored of life and had to find something entertaining to do; that's why he set off by himself and became like that. He was extremely greedy.
"Arrrrrr," he said, squinting his right eye as he spotted someone by the shore of the river where his small ship was headed to. He quickly took off his left eyepatch and used his binoculars to see if that person had anything worth stealing. As he spied on that person, he noticed a small treasure chest made of gold. He immediately knew it was worth taking.
"Men, get ready! We are heading to shore!" he said, putting his left eyepatch on again. Even though he traveled alone, he liked to pretend that he had a crew with him. He turned the wheel and in no time, he reached shore. A man saw him and knew that he was going to take his treasure chest. He quickly took it and began running before Gan Ning could reach him.
"Arrrrrr!" Gan Ning shouted, jumping out of his ship. While he jumped, he held his sword with his right hand in the air. The man got on his horse and took off. "Oh no you don't!" Gan Ning shouted, using his musou. He ran so fast that he caught up to the horse. He saw a vine and had an idea. He jumped, grabbed it, and swung past the guy in a giant 180 degree circle and knocked the guy off his horse in perfect timing. As the man fell, Gan Ning quickly snatched the treasure chest away from him. "Yee-Ha!" he shouted in excitement. The horse ran for ten seconds and stopped when it realized that Gan Ning was not the owner of him.
"What'cha doin? Get runnin' yo!" Gan Ning said, slapping the horse's butt. The horse stood up with his bottom two feet and made him fall off. "Arrrr, ya stupid horse!" he shouted. Then the horse kicked him as he fell down a twenty feet cliff and landed on a bunch of leaves. He was sprawled and his head tilted to the right. Both of his eyes were shut and his tongue stuck out to the right. In five seconds, he gasped got up. He looked for the treasure chest and it was in front of him. "Oh yeah! It's mine now!" he shouted, grabbing it. He began walking and found his way back to his ship at dawn. He set off to the next village where his friend Ling Tong lived. While the ship sailed, he opened the treasure chest and found a bunch of gold in it. He hugged it tightly with a grin on his face. Pretty soon, it began raining.
"Are you friggin' kidding me?" he said, shaking his head. It got really dark and he took out his flash light and shoned it on shore so he wouldn't miss the next village. Out of nowhere, he heard something.
"Ade due Damballaaaaaaaa," said a voice from the other side of the ship. "Give me the power I beg of youuuuuuu..."
"Who's there?" he shouted, hugging the treasure chest even tighter. "Ain't none gon' steal from Gan Ning, the ultimate pirate!" He shoned the flashlight around the ship and saw no one. "Tch. Just another silly imagination."
"Leveau mercier du bois chaloitte," it said again. "Secoise entienne mais pois de morte."
"Go away!" he shouted, throwing weapons to the direction where the voice came from. He didn't hit anyone or anything and he got really scared. He shoned his flashllight to the shore and saw the village he was headed to. He ran to steer the ship but ran to the other side when he heard an evil laugh surrounding his ship.
"Er her her her her her her he ha ha ha!" it laughed, echoing really loud.
"Ahhhhhh!" Gan Ning shouted, taking off the eye patch from his left eye. He saw the wheel turning by itself, heading deeper into the sea. "Noooo!" he screamed, not knowing what to do. He had no other choice but to swim to the village. He had to choose between his life or his treasures and he chose his life because he didn't want to die in the sea. He kissed his treasure chest goodbye and dived into the water. When he floated back up, the voice resumed.
"Morteisma lieu de vocuier de mieu vochette," it chanted.
"Ahhhhhh!" he shouted, swimming as fast as he could while the rained poured down really hard. He had never been that scared in his whole life. He swam even faster and almost reached shore.
"Endenlieu pour du boisette damballa!" it shouted. "Endenlieu pour du boisette damballaaa!" He reached shore and ran as fast as he could into the village while screaming. "Endenlieu pour du boisette damballaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" As he ran past some houses, he slipped on mud. Many people came out of their houses to see what was going on.
"Gan Ning, is that you?" Ling Tong said, running to him. Gan Ning got on his knees and cried while that thing laughed evily really loud. No one could hear it except for him and in a bit, the laughter stopped. That was the day when Gan Ning officially learned his lesson about stealing and retired from being a pirate...
Han Dang
Huang Gai
Lian Shi
Lian Shi had been secretly seeing another guy behind Sun Quan's back. One night when Sun Quan wasn't home, she got dressed, did her makeup and hair, and snuck out of the house. The man she had been seeing lived twenty minutes away from her. When she was halfway there, it was very dark and she saw a short figure up ahead. She stopped and examined it. It was really short, about the size of a baby, and it scared her because she was at an abandoned farm right now. Rumors say that the farm is haunted at night. She got really scared but wanted to be with the new guy right now so she kept going.
All of a sudden, a tiny rock came flying to her from the direction where she saw that small figure. She turned back to look at it but it was gone. Before she knew it, she ran all the way to the guy's house and went inside without knocking. As she closed the door, the man approached her.
"Oh my god! You probably won't believe this but I saw something really small and I think it threw a rock at me and it probably followed me over here or something," she told him, gasping for air. She noticed that he kept a distance and didn't say anything. "Are you okay?" He slowly walked up to her and placed his thumb on her forehead.
"Ade due Damballa," he said, emotionlessly. "Give me the power I beg of you..."
"What?" Lian Shi said, looking at him confused.
"Leveau mercier du bois chaloitte," he replied. He wasn't speaking Chinese and it freaked her out. For some reason, she just knew something was wrong so she made a run out the door. He suddenly ran after her too, which scared her even more. She screamed and ran as fast as she could back home. While she ran, he chanted after her.
"Secoise entienne mais pois de morte. Morteisma lieu de vocuier de mieu vochette," he said, running like a zombie.
"Ahhhhhhhh!" screamed Lian Shi. She tried to wake up but couldn't because it was all really happening to her. When she got home, she locked all the doors and didn't see or hear the guy anymore. She cried all night and when morning came, she walked over to the guy's house to break it off with him for being so creepy last night. Only except when she reached his house, there was no house. Instead, she came upon a graveyard with his name on it and ran back home as soon as she saw it. She learned her lesson to never cheat on her husband again...
Ling Tong
Ling Tong's mother has had it with his laziness around the house. He never cooked or cleaned. Instead, he always went out and did whatever he wanted. One afternoon, she went to see what he was doing. He was sleeping and she got really pissed off. She decided to put matters into her own hand.
"Ling Tong, get up you lazy bastard!" she yelled, yanking his blanket away. "I can't have you sleeping all afternoon and evening like a pig twenty-four seven! I didn't raise you to become like that!"
"Whaaaaat," he said, opening one eye.
"Get your lazy butt up and go to the market to get me some vegetables and fruits, you old man!" she yelled.
"Ughh," he said, sitting up. "I'm not even an old man." He got dressed and put on his flip flops. "You have money?" he asked her. He didn't want to use his own money.
"Don't you dare ask me for money, you good for nothing lazy bone!" she shouted. Ling Tong shook his head, grabbed his gambling money, and began walking to the market. It was a very cloudy day. He walked up and down some hills and in no time, he reached the market. He bought some eggpants, cilantros, green onions, onions, bell peppers, jalepeno peppers, bananas, apples, grapes, oranges, and lemon because his mother always bought those vegetables and fruits. He got a stick and put the buckets of vegetables and fruits on it and carried it on his shoulders and began walking home. He noticed that no one was around so he began humming.
"Hm hm hmmm," he hummed, as it began sprinkling. Suddenly he heard something.
"Ade due Damballa," it whispered. "Give me the power, I beg of you." He quickly stopped humming and looked around.
"Who's there?" he said, seeing no one. He began walking off.
"Leveau mercier du bois chaloitte," it whispered again. Ling Tong had a really short temper and got pissed off that someone was messing with him.
"Show yourself and speak Chinese!" he shouted, putting the stick and buckets down, and taking out his weapon. He looked around again and saw no one. "Stupid. That's what I thought. Better be scared of the Legendary Ling Tong. Don't you know I'm related to Bruce Lee?" He picked up the stick and buckets again and walked up a hill. It rained a littled harder.
"Secoise entienne mais pois de morte," it shouted, really loud and echoing through the hills. It was then that he noticed it was a monster or a ghost messing with him. "Morteisma lieu de vocuier de mieu vochette!"
"Ahhhhhhh," he shouted, making a run down the hill. As he ran, he slipped and rolled down the hill. The vegetables and fruits fell out of the bucket and rolled after him. When he stopped rolling, the stick flew and conked him in the head. "Leave me alone!" He got up and began running, but he fell down really fast because his flip flop had broke.
"Endenlieu pour du boisette damballa!" it shouted. Ling Tong was about to pick up the vegetables and fruits but was too afraid that the chanting thing was going to get him. He took off his shoes and began running home. "Endenlieu pour du boisette damballa!" The voice was right behind him.
"Ahhhhhhhhh!" he shouted with all his might. He was almost home so he ran even faster.
"Endenlieu pour du boisette damballa!" it shouted one last time as Ling Tong reached his house. He slammed the door shut and began crying out of terror. That thing laughed for fifteen seconds and then stopped. In a minute, Ling Tong slowly opened the door to see if it was still there.
"Er her her her her her!" it laughed, as Ling Tong screamed and slammed the door shut again. He locked it and ran to his mom. He got a knuckle head for not bringing anything home. As he explained what had happened, his mother laughed at him and thought he was crazy. She made fun of him until "Er her her her" laughed outside their window and scared her too...
Lu Meng
Lu Su
Lu Xun
Sun Ce
Sun Ce walked into Da Qiao's house and went inside her room. He was really excited to see the portrait that the love of his life had painted for him. He walked to her desk with a big smile on his face. On the desk was a painting of him, only except the head was replaced with an acorn. His jaws dropped as he fell to his knees, putting his right hand over his heart. He didn't blink at all because his feelings were hurt. It felt like someone had just shot an arrow through his heart. He pictured Da Qiao and Xiao Qiao together right now, talking and laughing about what an acorn head he had. He was very mad, sad, and hurt that she had done that to him. Even if it was a joke or not, it wouldn't take the pain away.
"Ade due Damballa," said a voice under the bed. "Give me the power I beg of you." As soon as Sun Ce heard that, he got up. "Leveau mercier du bois chaloitte." Curious, he walked to the bed and looked under it to see who was there. When he saw no one, he got up and ran out of the house. "Secoise entienne mais pois de morte!" it shouted after him.
"Ahhhhh!" he screamed, getting on a horse. It began running to Da Qiao's parent's house.
"Morteisma lieu de vocuier de mieu vochette," it chanted after him. "Endenlieu pour du boisette damballa! Endenlieu pour du boisette damballaaaa!"
"Leave me alone!" he shouted, as the horse ran even faster.
"Endenlieu pour du boisette damballaaaaaaaa!" it shouted one more time and laughed. "He he heeeee! Ha ha ha haaaa! Oh ho ho ho ho hooooo!" When Sun Ce reached Da Qiao's parent's house, he knocked on the door and they opened it for him. When he saw Da Qiao crying, he knew that Da Qiao wasn't the one who drew the acorn head. He went to her and gave her a hug because he was sure that the same thing had happened to her too...
Sun Jian
One day Sun Jian found himself walking home. He enjoyed the fresh air and walked past a beautiful stream. He heard many birds chirping and the wind blew gently on his face. He smiled to himself because he never knew how beautiful nature was. There were many friendly animals around him and they walked with him. He had been walking for hours and realized that he had already walked down that path before. It was where he first began walking home. All of a sudden, the animals began running off and the chirping of the birds had stopped.
"What's going on?" he said, looking around.
"Hey," whispered a voice. "Over here!" He turned to where the voice came from and saw Chucky poking his head out from a bunch of tall grass.
"Hiiiiiiii," Chucky said, waving hi to him. He had an evil smile on his face.
"Oh! What's going on?" Sun Jian said, confused because Chucky was only a doll but he was somehow alive.
"I heard you've been very, very naughty," Chucky said, coming out of the tall grass with his evil smile. He tip toed toward Sun Jian and had a stick with him and gently hit his own hand five times. Sun Jian knew that the doll was going to do something horrible to him.
"I don't know what you're talking about," Sun Jian replied. He turned around and ran as fast as he could to get away from him.
"Uh-uh-uh," Chucky said, shaking his head, throwing the stick, and knocking him down. "Not now, Jian. Not now." Sun Jian got up and ran again.
"Please! Just let me go! I don't know what you're talking about!" Sun Jian said, running as fast as he could. Chucky began laughing and ran after him. He chased him all around the area but no matter where Sun Jian ran, he always ended back where he started. He thought to himself that he could run but he couldn't hide from Chucky. He decided that since Chucky was small, he probably wouldn't be able to swim across the river to his left. He ran, took a dive, and swam as fast as he could. He turned back and saw that Chucky didn't dive into the water like he did. Instead, he laughed and laughed at him evily. Sun Jian didn't care and continued swimming. He held his breath for a long time and closed his eyes. When he opened his eyes to see how close he was to the other side, he realized that he was swimming three feet above the water and his body didn't even get wet. He turned back to Chucky again and he still laughed and pointed at him. He stopped swimming and realized that he had been dead the whole time; that's why he couldn't find his way out of that area!
"NO! NO! NOOOO!" he shouted, crying. Chucky continued laughing at him until his world came crumbling down. "NOOOOOOOO!" All of a sudden, he woke up in his bed, sweating like crazy. He looked around and around for Chucky but didn't see him. Instead, he heard footsteps downstairs.
"Er her her her her her!" it laughed, opening the front door and slamming it. It ran away and Sun Jian recognized the laugh from his dreams. He ordered all his guards to watch over him while he went back to sleep...
Sun Quan
Sun Quan came back from a war meeting at night while Lian Shi stayed at her parent's house for the night. He grabbed an apple and a banana as a late night snack and took it to his room. He ate his apple while taking a royal bath, and when he almost finished it, his banana flew into the tub with him out of nowhere. He looked around but there was no one there to throw the banana. When he finished the last of his apple, he picked the banana up and threw it out of the tub. Then he closed his eyes and relaxed for two minutes when something splashed into the tub again. He flinched, looked down, and saw the banana again. He shook his head and picked it up.
"Whoever's doing this better stop before they get fired," he said, throwing the banana again. He pretended to sleep, slightly opening his right eye in case whoever was throwing the banana at him came back. After waiting for ten minutes, he officially closed his eyes. Five seconds later, the banana came flying, hit his head, and fell into the water for the third time. He opened his eyes as fast as he could but didn't catch whoever was behind it. At the same time, if someone did it, he would've heard their footsteps, but he didn't so he got paranoid. He quickly washed up and went to lay on his bed. He did not know how long he had been asleep, but in the middle of the night, he woke up with a peeled banana in his mouth.
"Pffft," he said, spitting the banana out. He looked around and saw no one so he began sleeping again.
"Ade due Damballa," said a voice from his bathroom. "Give me the power I beg of you." Sun Quan opened his eye and thought he was tripping. His heart began racing. "Leveau mercier du bois chaloitte. Secoise entienne mais pois de morte." He got up and began walking to his bathroom slowly. Along the way, he grabbed his sword. "Morteisma lieu de vocuier de mieu vochette. Endenlieu pour du boisette damballa!" He reached the bathroom but froze to listen to what it was saying. "Endenlieu pour du boisette damballa! Endenlieu pour du boisette damballa!" He quickly jumped into the bathroom.
"Hai-ya!" he shouted, looking at the tub. There were so many bananas, and one by one, they flew to him as he quickly played fruit ninja, slicing all the bananas that came flying to him. He sliced about twenty bananas when a bunch of banana's came to him at once. One banana flew into his mouth as he heard an evil laughter.
"Er her her her her her!" it laughed from the bathtub. He quickly looked in the tub and saw no one. All the hair on his body stood up as he made a run out of his room.
"Ahhhhhhhhhhh!" he shouted, running out of the house. While he ran, the thing laughed and threw bananas at him from his window until he was no longer in sight of the house...
Sun Shang Xiang
Sun Shang Xiang and Liu Bei had gotten married not too long ago. When Liu Bei went to a meeting, she decided to practice shooting her bow and arrows after she finished doing a bunch of other stuff. She grabbed her things and walked into the open field. She concentrated on a tree and shot it five out of five times.
"Whoo, Shang Xiang, you really rock!" she told herself, laughing. She began shooting with style now. She cartwheeled, flipped many times, and shot her arrows. She hit the tree seven out of ten times. She smiled and walked to the tree to pick up her arrows so it wouldn't go to waste.
"Ade due Damballa," said a voice close by.
"Huh?" Sun Shang Xiang said, looking around. "Who's there?"
"Give me the power, I beg of you," it replied. She immediately thought someone was hurt and was willing to help them right away.
"Where are you? Let me know so I can find you and help you," she said.
"Over here," it whispered. "Keep coming closer..." She followed the voice and got closer to it. "Stop," it told her.
"Stop?" she asked, stopping.
"Now close your eyes and lay down," it instructed.
"How am I supposed to help you if I close my eyes?" she replied.
"Just do it," it told her. She closed her eyes and layed down. All of a sudden, she felt a thumb on her forehead. "Now, just keep your eyes closed, okay?"
"Okay," she replied, not thinking anything of it.
"Ade due Damballa," it began. "Give me the power I beg of you." It began sprinkling and when it rained harder, the voice resumed. "Leveau mercier du bois chaloitte. Secoise entienne mais pois de morte." As Sun Shang Xiang layed there closing her eyes, she wondered what that person was doing. "Morteisma lieu de vocuier de mieu vochette. Endenlieu pour du boisette-" it said, suddenly stopping. Sun Shang Xiang heard someone walking not too far away from them. "Shit!" said the voice, as it quickly pulled its thumb away. Then she heard it running off.
"Sun Shang Xiang?" said a voice that she recognized. She smiled, opened her eyes, and sat up. "What are you doing sleeping out there? Come inside."
"Lord Liu Bei!" she shouted, running to him. "Someone was hurt so I tried to help them."
"Who?" asked Liu Bei.
"I don't know because I had my eyes closed," she replied. Liu Bei shook his head.
"My lady, please, don't ever close your eyes when helping strangers. You never know what they're capable of," he told her.
"That person was friendly," she replied. "Didn't you see him?"
"No," replied Liu Bei. "I didn't see anyone." Suddenly Sun Shang Xiang realized that the guy or whoever he was, was trying to take over her body. She screamed and told Liu Bei about it as they ran inside their house...
Taishi Ci
Xiaoqiao
Xiao Qiao was being very conceited one night when she was alone. She got her makeup and hair done and kept looking into the mirror to compliment herself. She made a bunch of smiley faces and silly faces and was very confident.
"Xiao Qiao, you are way to cute to be ugly even when you make ugly faces," she told herself, smiling. Then she closed one eye and stuck out her tongue while checking herself out. "Kawaii!" she shouted, smiling. All of a sudden, her candle light went out as she flinched.
"Ade due Damballa," said a voice from her closet.
"Zhou Yu, is that you?" she asked, squinting her eyes.
"No, it's me, Chucky," it whispered. She was very confused because she didn't know who Chucky was.
"Who are you?" she asked again.
"I just told you! Chucky!" it whispered. Still, Xiao Qiao didn't know who he was.
"Who are you Chucky? What are you doing here?" she asked.
"I'm going to be the supreme ruler of the three kingdoms! I'm here to overtake your soul!" he said to her as she gasped. "Give me the-"
"But why?" she asked, scared.
"Why? Because I want to and I can!" he replied. "Give me the power I-"
"For what? What did I do?" she said.
"Jesus Christ, lady! Stop interrupting me! I'm trying to take over your soul peacefully! I can pop out and kill the shit out of you right now if you'd rather have that!" it shouted. A chill ran up Xiao Qiao's spine as she screamed and ran out of her house. That thing laughed after her until she reached Zhou Yu's house...
Zhou Tai
Zhou Tai was on his way to Sun Quan's house when he saw people selling food. He went to check it out and saw them selling eggrolls. He decided to buy some for Sun Quan and himself. When he walked far away from those people, he thought he heard someone.
"Ade due Damballa," it said, as he continued walking and looked around. "Give me the power I beg of you." He knew that no one was around and that whoever was talking was probably dead.
"I know I'm safe as long as I'm alive," he replied calmly. "Please, have an eggroll and escort me to my friend's house safely." He kneeled down and put one eggroll on the floor. As he prayed for it, the eggroll started rolling by itself. After that, he walked all the way to Sun Quan's house without encountering anything else...
Zhou Yu
One evening, Zhou Yu walked to the market and saw a beautiful batch of flowers for sale. He immediately bought it for his sweet heart Xiao Qiao. While walking to her house, he thought of some quotes to say to her.
"Xiao Qiao, you are as pretty as these flowers when they bloom underneath the star light star bright in the heavens," he said, and stopped. "Nah, that's too cheezy." He continued walking and thought of another one.
"Xiao Qiao, the love of my life, would you be so kind as to accept these beautiful flowers that you put to shame underneath the moonlight?" he said, kneeling on one knee and holding the flowers in front of him. "Hmm, still too cheezy." He got up and started walking again.
"Xiao Qiao, no other girl deserves these beautiful flowers other than the beautiful girl standing right before my eyes," he said, smiling. "Yeah, I kinda like this one. It's not as cheezy as the other two." As he continued walking, he rehearsed the line over and over again.
"Ade due Damballa," said a voice. "Give me those flowers, I beg of youuuu!"
"What?" Zhou Yu asked, looking around. He saw no one and thought he had imagined it so he continued walking.
"Give me those flowers, I beg of youuuuuu!" it said again. Zhou Yu looked around and didn't see anyone so he ignored it and kept walking. The voice grew angrier. "I said, GIVE ME THOSE FLOWERS, I BEG OF YOUUUUUUUUUU!" Zhou Yu looked around for the third time and saw no one again.
"How am I supposed to give you these flowers if I can't even see you?" he said, shaking his head. "Whoever you are, show yourself because I will never give these flowers up without a fight."
"Oh yeah?" it replied. "Leveau mercier du bois chaloitte...Secoise entienne mais pois de morte." Suddenly it began raining. Zhou Yu quickly put the flowers under his shirt and looked around. "Morteisma lieu de vocuier de mieu vochette." After not seeing anyone, he immediately knew it was some kind of ghostly thing that he had encountered. It had the ability to make it rain and only God knew what other abilities it had. The wind blew really hard, almost knocking him down. "Endenlieu pour du boisette damballa! Endenlieu pour du boisette damballaaaa! Endenlieu pour du boisette damballaaaaaaaa!" it shouted, as a tornado started forming. Terrified, Zhou Yu took out the batch of flowers.
"ENOUGH!" he shouted, throwing the flowers to the floor. "TAKE IT!" All of a sudden, the tornado, strong wind, and rain went away, including the voice. When he took a look at the flowers, it vanished too. "God damn. All that over a batch of flowers?" he said, shaking his head. After that, he walked all the way to Xiao Qiao's house...
Zhu Ran