I hated the silence. It was natural to be silent.
When we fucked, I didn't feel the need to talk. We just did.
It was absurd. Me and Jay. Who came up with this?
We were in the Van before we knew it, him having to crawl on all fours and I, with my back to the wall. I played with his belt before sliding it off. His strokes weren't sensitive but fiery, fast paced, intensifying. I felt him opening my legs. Before I closed my eyes, we were having sex. Four play.
I buckled. I knew I can do this over and over to her and she wouldn't deny it. I can be a gentleman as each hard stroke softened until she came. I exploded and unleashed myself inside of her.
Was it fun and games or do I want more? I cleaned up and helped her clean up too. We just stared at each other and got back into my car uncomfortably. I turned her chin up. "Do you love me...?"
Huh. That was a bad question. "What exactly do you want, Jay...? Sex or more...?"
"I'm only doing crazy things for you."
I am overwhelmed by his questions. He sure didn't act like this when he was with Alex and hated me.
"Being physical with you means I don't have to care. And get hurt in the end."
"But I'm good now," I pleaded with her. "I got cleaned of all and any Social Diseases and I'll even throw out the bracelets!"
I sighed and said I would think about it.
I can't believe it. MY MOM! Came. To. The. Ravine.
"Emma Nelson, get in the car!"