I am horrible... At least there is only two more chapters after this! ^_^ And then I get to post my next story which is mostly complete already. Just have to edit and finish the last couple of chapters. Anyway... Here is the chapter...
Silence filled the room for a while after that. Clint relaxed into the hospital bed with a deep sigh. He had never wanted to relive what happened to Angela. It had been horrible enough to live through it the first time, never mind telling it to people he would either assume to be his friends or soon to call his friends. That was one of the main reasons why he never talked about his past. Too many bad things happened have happened in his life. The worst is knowing that Clint hadn't even spoken of the main events that made him who he was. Yeah, he mentioned the mother of his child dying and his first murder but... Neither was the first death he had ever actually seen. Yeah, he had dealt with his parents dying but he had never seen it.
"How old were you when you first saw someone die?" Natasha asked out of the blue. Clint jerked forward, snapping his eyes open. He hadn't even realized he had closed them. Looking over at Natasha, he could see her concerned look. Even Bruce looked a little worried. It was then that Clint realized he must have been drifting off to sleep. A still currently dangerous thing considering his injuries.
"What?" Clint mumbled, still a little dazed from almost passing out on the group. Natasha looked to Bruce, unsure what to do now. Clint assumed then that they must have been trying to get his attention for a while. Becoming slightly worried himself, Clint shifted in the bed to try and get uncomfortable. Cause if he was uncomfortable, then he wouldn't try to sleep again.
Bruce slowly stood and walked over to Clint. Methodically, he began checking on the machines, making sure everything was going smoothly. He had also noticed that no other doctor came in to check on them and it had been a few hours. Clint was silent as he watched Bruce work. Steve and Thor shifted on the couch, each wanting to do something but unsure what to do. Suddenly a loud grumble burst through the room. It almost sounded like a rumble of thunder or an earthquake. Everyone turned to look at the two. It was a noise they were getting rather familiar with lately.
"Sorry," Thor said sheepishly as he gripped his stomach. After a second, Clint burst into laughter followed by Steve, then Tony and finally Bruce. Natasha shook her head with a small smile until Thor finally began joining in the laughter as well, then she let out a soft giggle.
"Guys, go get some food," Clint ordered. Thor took a glance at Steve. When the captain nodded his agreement, the demigod was the first one out of the room to get something. Tony stood and shifted toward the door. He stood next to the frame as Steve got to his feet. Natasha slipped out the door but stopped in the hallway. None of them wanted to leave Clint alone and they weren't sure if Bruce would be fine being ditched with the archer.
"Go! We'll be fine," Bruce called to them. Natasha nodded and vanished down the hall. Tony smirked before slipping into Natasha's place. Steve moved toward Tony's old spot.
"Would you guys like anything?" Steve asked. Bruce nodded.
"Some toast, or a sandwich," Bruce answered. Steve nodded and turned toward Clint before realizing he had no idea if Clint could eat anything at the moment. Bruce noticed and smiled. At least someone else was concerned for Clint. "He can eat."
"Okay, what would you like?" Steve questioned. Clint shrugged, not used to S.H.I.E.L.D food for a while.
"Nat will know what to get me," he replied. Steve lifted his thumb up in agreement before mentally noting that he'd have to make sure that Natasha got food for Clint. The duo disappeared after the remained of the team in an effort to find food. Left alone, Bruce and Clint didn't know what to do or even say. Clint couldn't continue with his history and Bruce had no idea what topic would be safe. Feeling awkward, Bruce returned to the seat he ditched earlier.
"Thanks," Clint called after a few minutes of utter silence. Bruce stiffened before humming a question to the archer. Clint smirked. "Thanks for telling the others."
"About what?"
"About... Well, everything I told you," Clint retorted. Bruce waved it off like it was nothing. Clint shook his head, understand that Bruce didn't get why he was thanking him. "I would never have told them..."
"Why?" Bruce asked. Clint jerked up to stare at the doctor. Bruce smiled softly. "Why didn't you want to tell us anything before?"
"I... I don't really know... I guess... I was afraid that... That you guys wouldn't... Wouldn't still want me on the team," Clint claimed as he turned away from Bruce. Bruce stiffened, knowing the feeling but his never stemmed from his past. It always had to deal with Hulk. He sighed before relaxing and getting to his feet once again. Slowly he walked over to Clint and placed a hand on the archer's shoulder. Almost as if it was painful, Clint turned to look at the doctor.
"There is no need to ever worry about that. We've all been through so much already. Nothing is going to break this team apart. I can promise you that," Bruce told the archer. Clint smirked, not sure if he could truly believe Bruce.
"But... What if I miss a really important shot?"
"What if I destroy the tower?" Bruce countered. Clint laughed even though he knew it was possible. "Clint, there is nothing you can do wrong that will make us want you off the team. Trust me when I say that someone on this team could do something worse, or did something worst."
"Helicarrier?"
"Thor's brother."
"The hijacking arrow?"
"Jericho," a new voice called as Tony walked into the room. In his hands was a green crap-stinking shake. Clint and Bruce grimaced at the sight. For a brief moment, Clint wondered if he lost his appetite. Then Tony drank a sip and Clint gagged a little. Tony frowned at the archer before making sure to take another long drink while Clint was looking. Once over the shake, Tony smirked. "Hell, I used to be the biggest weapons manufacturer in the world."
"Were you listening in?" Clint muttered, trying not to focus on the shake in the genius's hand. Tony shrugged, a pleased smile on his face. Bruce rolled his eyes. It was at least somewhat pleasing to know that Tony would still mess with Clint.
"From Bruce mentioning that someone did worse or could do worse than you," Tony admitted. Clint laughed. "Hey, it's true man."
"Now I sound like a weak link," Clint joked. Tony and Bruce turned serious. That was so not what they meant.
"No," they both snapped together. Clint winced at their tones. He had joked but it was something that had been on his mind for a while. Something he had wanted to bring up a few times before.
"Don't ever think that," Bruce demanded.
"You mean so much to this team. You're our eyes in the sky!" Tony cried. Clint shook his head, thinking the billionaire was joking as well. "Hey, don't knock it! You can do a shit ton of stuff, not just fire arrows at our enemies."
"Oh yeah?" Clint challenged. Tony nodded but before he could go on explaining what Clint had done for the team that didn't involve shooting arrows, Natasha stormed in and slammed a tray down on a rolling cart next to Clint's bed. It was filled with fruits, veggies and a ton of healthy foods. Clint looked at it despairingly before turning to Natasha. "Where's the burger?"
"Wouldn't let me in with one. The ass hats said that you'd be better with this," she snarled. Clint wanted to argue with her, but considering she looked ready to rip out someone's voice box, Clint left it alone. Thor and Steve entered a few minutes later. The demigod was rapidly finished what looked to be a hamburger. Clint glowered at the god until Steve pulled a cheeseburger out from behind his back and tossed it to the archer. It took a moment for Clint to realize what the captain did before he smiled and began ripping apart the package to get at the grease bomb inside. "Course, I made Steve sneak some in for you."
"Thanks," Clint grumbled between bites of his warm meal. It actually meant a lot that Natasha had thought of a secondary way to get the burger inside and that Steve was willing to 'break the rules' to bring it to him.
"Be careful, we wouldn't want you getting sick from eating too fast," Bruce mentioned. Clint nodded and slowed it down a bit. Steve then handed over a turkey sandwich to the doctor. He nodded his thanks and began peeling away the saran wrap. For a while the room was only filled with munching and slurping as the Avengers ate their meals.
"So... This is fun," Tony called after he finished his drink. "Anyone wanna play a game?"
After a round of groaning deeply and even tossing some trash at the genius, it was determined that they would continue to sit in silence for a bit longer. It was just after Clint finished eating his second burger and began working on some carrots that a S.H.I.E.L.D doctor came in.
"Hello, and how are you?" the doc asked without even looking over Clint's chart. Bruce knew that this doctor wasn't the same one that had been on duty when Clint first arrived. He tensed when it looked as if the doc wasn't even going to go look over the notes that sat at the end of Clint's bed. The same notes that mentioned what was wrong with him at the moment. Clint frowned. He hadn't ever seen this doc before. And considering his history with S.H.I.E.L.D medical, normally he kept the same doc for every visit. But, who was he to currently argue against this?
"Tired," Clint admitted. Everyone made a noise of agreement as none of them had slept for over twenty hours. The new doctor nodded.
"Have you slept?" he inquired, thinking Clint was just being a hard ass. Bruce's eyes flashed green as he glared openly at the doc. The scientist was already tried, cranky and on edge with what was happening to Clint, he really didn't want to deal with a moron trying to masquerade as a good doctor. Tony's eyes narrowed. He almost wished someone had mentioned that Clint could have slept. Would have been nice for the all. Natasha felt her hip pocket for a small knife. She had seen Bruce's eyes flash and was prepared to attack the new doctor in case Bruce let loose. Steve frowned at the new doc. Something about this didn't seem right. Thor gripped so hard onto the metal fork in his hand that it bent. The tension in the room had made him tense as he waited to see what would happen next. Clint's eyes darkened. This was why he hated doctors. They were never on the same page.
"I'm not allowed," Clint snarled, wishing that he had the strength to get up and beat this idiot to death. He had been having trouble with the docs at S.H.I.E.L.D for a while but none of them ever openly did something wrong in front of the others. It was almost as if this guy had a death wish. His eyes narrowed, wondering when the doc was going to correct himself.
"Why aren't you allowed?" the doc muttered, having never heard another doctor tell a patient such a thing. Clint almost shouted out the answer to his questioned but Bruce jumped to his feet, green beginning to tinge his skin. Almost right away, Clint knew that this was going to get bad. Bruce may be a doctor of physics but he had spent time as an actual doctor before and knew the right and wrong things that a real doc would do.
"Get out," Bruce growled. The doctor turned to Bruce and with one look everyone knew this guy either didn't know they were the Avengers or was a complete moron. Bruce was going with complete moron as he watched the man stiffen and try to puff out his own chest to intimidate Bruce. The doc had no idea what he did when he basically challenged Hulk. Steve shot to his feet to try and get ready to stop Bruce if needed. Thor gracefully stood, following his leader's silent order to defend the moron before them.
"You can't order me around," the doc claimed. Clint stiffed, seeing the deteriorating issue. He almost wished that he could get out of the bed and force the doc to back down himself but in his current condition, the doc could probably put him on the floor instead. Tony picked up his cell phone with an angry scoff at the doctor before him as he backed away from the group. After a moment to make sure no one was watching, he made a call. Natasha shifted so that she was one step away from being between the two angry doctors.
"GET OUT!" Bruce roared, his body getting slightly larger and the green tinge darkening. The doc frowned before glancing around, taking a really good look at the group that surrounded him. As he suddenly paled, Clint knew that the doc finally figured out who he was dealing with. Bruce took a meaning step forward, redrawing the other doc's attention. This time his voice took on a deep guttural growl. "Get out."
"Yes!" the doc squeaked in horror before rushing off without another word. Everyone watched him go before focusing on Bruce. This was one of the first times they got to watch Bruce calm himself down without changing over. Bruce took a full minute before relaxing his body. The green tint vanished first before his muscles disappeared but even though all trace of Hulk was gone, Bruce still looked livid. Knowing the situation was under control, Thor relaxed and sat back down on the couch.
"What was all that about?" Clint questioned, staring at Bruce in surprise. He had no idea what was going through the doc's mind. Surprised by the question, Bruce jerked his attention over to the archer. He was even more surprised by Clint's angered face. Steve shifted to stand one step away from the two of them. He knew better than to upset Bruce in this situation, but apparently, Clint had a death wish. Natasha joined Steve on the opposite side as she leveled a glare at the archer. "He was doing his job."
"No, he wasn't," Bruce nearly snapped. Taking a deep sigh, Bruce backed away from Steve and Natasha, showing that he was calm and there was no risk of Hulk. The duo nodded and backed off as well. Clint glared at the doc. "If he was doing his job, he would have picked up your chart when he first entered the room. Instead he began asking questioned and diagnosing you without the full image. I didn't want him to tell you it was okay to do something that would hurt more than help. God forbid, he got you to sleep or even tried to drug you. You could slip into a coma!"
There was a long pause here as Clint thought over the interaction with the doc. For a moment, it looked like he might not come to the same conclusion as Bruce but by the slight widening of his eyes and then the blank look that replaced it, everyone knew he had. Clint mentally sighed as he thought back to what things had been like before Manhattan. Before then, he only had one doctor. Now, no one wanted to deal with him. And when they were forced too, no one really diagnosed him properly. Hell, lately he had been taking care of himself, much to Natasha's chagrin.
"Could some of the medical staff, misdiagnose him out of some sort of revenge?" Steve wondered aloud. Everyone focused on him in shock. Clint's eyes darkened, wondering what the super solider may had heard. Natasha seemed the most stunned before she looked back to Clint, thinking that the archer would have mentioned something to her. Bruce frowned, not liking this at all. Thor growled, believing that S.H.I.E.L.D was as dangerous as his father had once suspected. Tony snarled before focusing back on his phone call, his voice darker and angrier than before. "I mean... Last month Clint got that fractured ankle. The doctor that was treating you then mentioned signs of a healing sprain."
"From my mission before. A different doc said I was fine even though my ankle hurt like a bitch," Clint finished, knowing where this was going. He had been seeing this happening long before now and just kept silent. No one wanted to hear him complain. Steve nodded, remembering the situation as if it was the day before. Bruce frowned before his eyes opened wide in realization. What if the entire time they were dealing with Clint's strange illness (where he lost his hearing), S.H.I.E.L.D doctors knew what was wrong with him? Could they have done it intentionally? Natasha focused on Bruce, wondering if he had any clue on what was being stated.
"Are you saying that the other doc knew Clint was injured by approved him in hopes that he'd get hurt even worse or killed?" Natasha summarized, unsure if she could believe that S.H.I.E.L.D would allow that. Hell, how could the spy group even have let that slip through the cracks? Steve yet again nodded, wishing he could do something else. Natasha's eyes turned murderous as she thought about all the times that Clint had been to medical since Manhattan. Steve, misunderstanding her expression, raised his hands up in an effort to calm the red headed assassin. Clint shifted deeper into the bed as he wondered when Natasha would turn her fury on him.
"Doesn't mean it's true! I could be wrong and they're just distracted!" Steve called, trying to fix the situation he had wrought. Thor stood up again, tensing his free hand into a fist as the other tightly curled around the handle for Mjolnir. Bruce shook his head, knowing that Steve was wrong.
"Or incompetent," he snarled. Natasha shook her own head in dismay. S.H.I.E.L.D went through thorough tests on all staff members to make sure they could handle any situation. Hence why none of them batted an eye about aliens, mutants or evil robots that frequently attacked. Clint winced at the darkness in Banner's tone. Glancing over his now angered friends, Clint could see where this was beginning to go. Fearing his termination from S.H.I.E.L.D, he knew he had to diffuse the situation.
"Guys! Hey! It's fine!" he cried, trying to get them to focus on him. No one looked at him. Frowning, Clint continued on. "I'm okay! Bruce got the stupid doc away. No harm, no foul!"
"No, Clint," Natasha said as she turned to look at the archer. He frowned. She continued on as if she didn't understand why he was frowning. "It's dangerous. If there are doctors out there using their positions to serve out revenge or their diluted version of justice, they endanger more than just the one agent. They endanger the whole team."
"I can handle it," Clint growled to her, shaking his head. Natasha stalked forward, pressing her hands down onto the end of the bed as she tried to control her rage. It was now that she realized he had known this for a while now. But why he hadn't told her, she couldn't figure out. She shook with rage.
"Like you handled anything since Manhattan!" she screamed at him. Clint's eyes narrowed. She knew that that was a sore subject. Hell, everyone in the room knew that was a sore subject. Yet here she was, throwing it in his face. Bruce shifted to grab Natasha and pull her away from Clint. Steve moved to help. Thor positioned himself near Clint's bed, making sure to show that he was just there to keep the archer sitting in the bed. Clint didn't even notice. Natasha looked away from Clint, knowing she may have gone too far.
"Drop it," Clint muttered so darkly that everyone winced at the tone. His eyes roamed over everyone. "Everyone just drop it."
"Clint, we can't. We care about you. If the doctors aren't treating you correctly, we worry. Hell, we even want to go fight them on your behalf," Bruce mentioned, not catching the shudder than ran through Clint's body. Bruce simply figured that after all of his life, Clint never really got used to the idea. Natasha tensed before shaking her head. One thing she had learned about Clint was that people hadn't ever stood up for him. But when they miraculously did, they usually had an ulterior motive, or they betrayed him, or they ended up dying on his behalf. Steve frowned, not understanding the assassins' reactions. Bruce looked back and forth between the two before he realized it was his fault. "Clint..."
"No. Just fucking drop it," Clint mumbled sounding like a mix of depressed and pissed off. Tony took this moment to finally finish his phone call and turned to face the group. It was obvious that they had forgotten all about the billionaire. Hearing Clint, the genius frowned. For a brief moment his mind ran through the bits and pieces of conversation he had heard and began to wonder if he was making the right decision. Clint looked too upset that the group was caring for him. But everyone else looked even more worried about the archer than before. Knowing that it was the best for everyone, even if some of them didn't agree, Tony put his decision into play.
"I've been meaning to tell you all for a while now. I've been working on a medical wing for the tower. It's actually been complete for almost a month now and Pepper and I have been going over applicants for the new positions but I think we're done with that now," Tony announced in the silence after Clint spoke. Bruce turned to Tony, pleased that the other Avenger saw fit to do such a thing. Thor frowned, wondering what the billionaire meant by his announcement. For all he knew, every building had a medical area. Steve and Natasha turned to look at Tony with pleased faces but Steve's face seemed more surprised than Natasha's. Clint's reaction happened to be the worst. The archer had been stunned into silence as Tony went on explaining about what was in the medical wing and what it was really for. But Clint couldn't focus on the genius's words. Instead he assumed the worst. "The cool thing about this is that I got Pepper to agree to this mostly because we can use it for Stark Industries. Yeah, it'd be helpful for the Avengers but not practical for the amount of times we get hurt or sick. So the full time staff would also work with our employees."
"Are you fucking insane?" Clint loudly questioned over the rant. His voice filled with anger and humiliation. Tony stiffened, not believing that something as simple as a medical facility in the tower could cause such a reaction. Thor's grip yet again tightened on Mjolnir in case he needed to break up a fight. Steve shifted his weight as he wondered what Tony could have said that set Clint off on another rampage. Bruce tensed, unsure what was going to happen next. Natasha pushed Tony back so that she could set herself up between the two. Tony easily stepped back, too stunned to do anything else.
"Go. Get permission to move him from Fury. Don't talk to the staff. Steve, go with Tony. Bruce, Clint has a lot of allergies to meds, get his full file from the docs. Thor, act as backup for him," Natasha ordered, kicking everyone out. One look from her head the men scrambling to follow her order. It took less than a minute before they were gone and Natasha turned all her attention on Clint. "What the fuck is your problem? Tony is trying to be helpful!"
Clint looked away from Natasha, more embarrassed than he had ever been before. He had nothing to say to her at the moment. All he could focus on was the fact that he had gotten close to the group. He cared for them. He cared about their opinion of him. And even worse, he felt horrible. It was all things that he had at one point in his life sworn to never do again. Now, he didn't know how to escape them. But at the same time, Clint couldn't help but think that the others shouldn't care for him so much. He wasn't worth it. Even as he thought it, Clint remembered back to what they said when he had lost his hearing. This whole situation was very similar.
"Clint, we care because you are important to us. Not just as a partner or even a team mate. You are our friend," Natasha declared after a few minutes of silence, feeling as if she had this talk once before. Remembering when he lost his hearing, Natasha recalled them proving themselves to Clint. Yet here he was, yet again, putting himself down. Thinking no one should care for him. "What happened?"
"Too many people betrayed me," Clint honestly answered as Tony and Steve appeared at the doorway. They stopped and listened to Clint's statement. Knowing they shouldn't interrupt, Tony patted Steve's shoulder. Surprised, Steve looked to him. Tony mouthed that they should give them a minute. Nodding in agreement, the duo then shifted into the hall. Sadly, they could still hear the two.
"Have I?" Natasha muttered. Clint paused for a moment before shaking his head. Bruce and Thor appeared in the hall and stopped at Tony and Steve. Tony mouthed that Natasha was trying to figure out what was going on with Clint. Agreeing with the fact that they should leave it alone, Bruce shifted to the other end of the hall and promptly sat down. Tony and Steve smiled at that as Thor gently placed Mjolnir on the ground beside him. "Have any of the others?"
"No but... It may just be too soon. It will come," Clint whined, but his voice spoke of the numerous experiences he had with betrayal. Natasha's heart ached at the sound. Tony closed his eyes, remembering the times his father had ignored him. Steve shook his head, wishing that Clint's past could have been different. Thor sighed deeply, wondering how right Loki was when he seemingly chose someone to control that was just like him. Bruce groaned, thinking about the different things he might be able to do to help convince Clint that none of the Avengers would willingly betray him. "It always does."
"What brought this on? What makes you think we'd betray you?" Natasha questioned, trying to figure out this line of thinking. Clint shuddered as his mind thought back to the biggest betrayal of his life. Natasha nearly screamed in frustration when she realized what might have been causing all this. "Is it talking about your past?"
"More like thinking about it," Clint admitted with a deep sigh. It was then that the Avengers realized why Clint never brought up his past. Yeah there was a lot of good things that happened but thinking about the good things normally always led to thinking about the bad. Especially when he had given them no hint about his past before. Slowly, Clint looked up at Natasha. His eyes were slowly beginning to fill with tears. "Did you know that Barney almost killed me?"
So... Update on Baby Clint... He has double pink eye and his second ear infection ever. But he is still a really happy baby! ^_^ Barely ever cries, is always laughing at something... He's walking on his own perfectly fine. It's just... HE DOESN'T TALK! I know that sounds strange but... He can only babble with 'd' sounds or say 'I did it' and 'Done.' He hasn't said 'momma' in forever, only says 'Elsa' with extreme prompting... But he'll do the Simpsons theme song... _ Ugh. As weird as this sounds... I can't wait till he starts talking. Remind me to read this chapter in the future when I complain about him talking... LOL.
Until next time. Review to remind me if it's been longer than two weeks. K? Good.