May 13th 1975 – Night
.
"Cas?" I was welcomed with an embrace "You are home earlier today"
"Well, I can come back another time if you want" I joked, Dean smiled and took me by the hand to the kitchen
"Dinner just arrived" He said cutting a piece of pizza "Come on, eat up"
"Wow, that's a surprise" I said eating a piece of pizza "You didn't try to cook something this time, Thanks to God"
"Hey, my cooking skills are great" Said Dean in a boyish manner, I laughed and cleaned the mustard off his chin with my napkin "Cas, don't clean me up… It makes me feel like a child"
"Well, if you didn't eat like one I wouldn't have to clean you up"
"I don't eat like a child!" Dean protested and I laughed "I'm your boyfriend not your child!"
"Boyfriend, hun?"
"Yes, we are boyfriends right?"
"I guess"
"You guess?!"
"I'm joking, Dean" I laughed and kissed his cheek
"Now you got ketchup on my cheek, who is the kid now?" Chucked Dean
"Technically YOU got ketchup in your cheek, so…"
"Hey!" Said Dean cleaning his cheek with a napkin "Smartass"
"How was your work today?" I decided to change the topic, to tell the truth I was a little shaken with all that happened today
"Same old, same old" Said Dean finishing another piece of pizza "Bobby called today…"
"How is he doing?"
"He is enjoying Detroit, maybe he is coming back for vacation"
"It would be good to talk with Bobby again…" Bobby and Dean were like Uncle and cousin, Bobby would tell the craziest stories about his time in another country and cities and Dean would dream about a life on the road, always moving, always doing something new.
"Yeah, Bobby is a lucky bastard… Living on the road, only he and his car" Dean sighed and drank a sip of beer "Lucky guy"
"We can do it someday" I grabbed his bottle of beer "Take a year off and live on the road, maybe even cross the country on four wheels, what about it?" I drank his beer and Dean chucked, most time he didn't like when I stole his beer, but this time he watched me drink it and smiled
"Yeah, that sounds like a plan, Cas"
"That's strange…" I chucked "You didn't get upset I stole you beer"
"Nah…" Dean smiled mischievously "Maybe I want to get you drunk, and then I get you into the bed…"
"And I fell for it like a little duck" I joked
"A wolf gotta eat" Dean said grabbing my shirt's collar "Little ducks taste real good, you know?"
We walked to my bedroom and Dean took his shirt off, with his teeth he took my tie off, I kissed his earlobe while we lie down.
"You are really in the mood, hun?" Dean whispered and I smiled in response, His hand ran down to my waist while I kissed his mouth; tongues touching slightly; my hands on his hair messing it between my fingers. "Cas?"
"Yes, Dean?"
"Do you love me?"
"I do" I replied silencing him with my mouth, Dean was trying to say something, but I didn't let him… His nails scratching my back lightly, his low moaning sounds just made me want more of him "C-cas?"
"Dean!" I stopped upset "I'm trying to have sex with you, can you shut up?"
"But there's someone knocking on the front door" He whispered, I putted my shirt on again hiding some red spots of skin where Dean sucked "Stay here, we have business to finish"
"Yes, sir" Said Dean smiling "I'll be waiting"
I walked to the door and opened it
"Are you Castiel?" It was a tall man, kind of Irish guy, blue eyes and blond.
"Yes, who are you?" I asked suspicious, that guy looked familiar somehow
"I'm Benny, nice to meet you" He extended his hand to me and I shook it "I thought you were dead!"
"I was held captive; those Vietcong's let me go… You know once the war was over" I was confused why was him here? "Can I come in?"
"Y-yes, of course" I said letting him in, he sat on the couch and I followed him curious "Why are you here?"
"I'm sorry for coming so late, but my leg is killing me" He said showing me a burn in his leg, it looked old, but red and raw
"Where did you get that?" I asked examining it
"War" He said embarrassed "I live next door, sorry to disturb you, but a friend of mine told you are a doctor… I'll pay you for this visit, just take a look at it, please"
"Ok" I said taking my aid kit from under the couch and cleaning his wound "Take this pills" I gave him some medication and dressed his wound "You need to keep it clean always, take one pill every day, no more, this is a powerful pain killer"
"Thank you doctor… How much I owe you?"
"Nothing" I said putting my aid kit away
"Benny?!" Said Dean walking into the room, Benny smiled and embraced him, luckily Dean was dressed. It made easier to explain Dean's presence on my apartment so late. "You are alive!"
"Yes, I am" Said Benny smiling "What you are doing here?"
"I'm sharing this apartment with Cas…"
"So that's the guy that kept sending you letters?"
"Yep"
Benny smiled at me and I smiled back embarrassed
"A good friend indeed, he helped me with my wound"
"Yeah, Cas got a big heart"
"Then I'll be going, see you guys around… I need to take my pills" I nodded and Dean walked him to the door, they talked about something and Benny left.
"Can you believe that?" Said Dean astonished
"Yeah, he is alive"
"Live is a box of surprises!" Dean grabbed me by my waist and kissed my lips "So can we go back to our business?"
"It's already late Dean…" Millions of things went through my mind, was Benny the guy that Dean slept with in the army? Benny knew about me and him? Did Benny like Dean?
"Cas…" Dean ran his fingers on my neck and chucked "Are you jealous?"
"Jealous?!" I replied shocked, I guess I was "Of whom?"
"Benny?"
"No"
"Yes, you are…" Laughed Dean "Come on baby, don't you want me?"
"Dean" He knew I hated when he called me baby
"Cas" He whispered looking right into my eyes; it was his way to ask 'what is wrong?'
"Dean… I'm just tired" I had too much to process in one day, having sex with Dean would just complicate stuff up
"Fine!" He said upset now "I'll sleep in my room"
"Dean…" I said holding his arm, not letting him go "I'm sorry"
"Cas, if you want this to work out, there can't be any secrets between you and me…"
"Why do you think I'm keeping a secret?"
"Because I know you" He said placing his hand on my cheek "Don't shut me down, Cas… I can't stand it"
"Dean"
"I went to the hospital to see you by morning…" He continued looking at me, Dean was worried, I haven't seen him like this since the day I ran away from home; when I was five "You weren't there, where were you Cas?"
"I was doing a house call" I lied, feeling guilty "You can ask John"
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"I didn't plan it, Dean… I just went to check up on him"
"...Sorry, Cas" Said Dean embracing me "I didn't mean to act like this… Man, I know you a long time, I should have known better"
"It's ok" I said kissing his cheek, Dean's smell brought me memories of us running on trails in a hot day, yellow fields of dry plants and a strange nostalgia. How things were simpler! No angels, no demons, no war or complicated situations. "Dean… Come on to bed, let's us sleep"
Dean nodded and smiled gently to me while I kissed his forehead, it was a pure kiss, like a brotherly kiss, something we used to do as kids. I felt like we were playing games again, like tag, and it was on me this time.
.
May 14th 1975
.
"Enjoy Dean much?" I heard a voice, I was dreaming again… A green field by morning, Gabriel was by my side.
"Gabriel?" I said confused "What you are doing here?"
"Checking up on you" He said sitting down and smiling "You know, You and Dean do share profound bond… It's kind of a crazy thing to think about it"
"Yeah, Dean and I got history…"
"Maybe too much…"
I paused trying to make sense of his statement, what was that supposed to mean?
"You and Dean always end up together, that puzzles me, Castiel… Is that God's way to say we are here because he wants it?"
"I don't understand…"
"Of course you don't, you couldn't understand not even if you tried now"
I felt strange like there was something wrong there; Gabriel wanted that angel's grace for some purpose, whose grace was in the box?
"Cas, you are such a luck guy… Getting all the good stuff, while I'm…." Gabriel paused and looked at me, he smiled "Never mind I should be going"
I wanted to ask him something, but Gabriel was gone and I felt a strange 'Déjà vu' sensation. I knew I heard that before.
"Cas, good morning" I heard Dean's voice and woke up
"Morning" I repeated yawning
"You okay?"
"Fine" I said a little shaken; Dean smiled and looked at my eyes like a curious child "Dean?"
He kissed me without saying a word; I smiled and kissed him back, Dean's lips were always warm and dry… I wondered why.
"Cas" He whispered in low tone, like he was afraid someone was listening to us "Can we take a day off?"
"It's Sunday Dean" I laughed
"Already?" He laughed and rested his head on my chest laying me down with him "I like when we are here… Like this"
"I like you like this" I joked while caressing his hair
"You funny guy" Chucked Dean while closing his eyes "I wish I could stay like this forever"
"Me too"
"Cas… I talked with my dad, he was kind of nervous… Is he ok?"
"Yes, his heath condition is improving…"
"I can't shake this feeling I'm gonna lose you…"
"You won't lose me, Dean" I smiled and held him closer "I won't let you go away that easy"
"I hear that"
"So breakfast?"
We ate breakfast and Dean told all about how he wanted his father's impala and how it works, while pretending to understand the 'auto talk' I wondered since when John was a man of letters, I needed to talk to him, I was full of questions.
"Cas?"
"I'm sorry Dean, did I spaced out?"
"Yeah, you can say that"
"Wow, sorry you know I don't get this car stuff, Dean"
"Yeah, can you just pretend to like it?"
"Sorry"
"You are way too distracted today, what's up?"
"I'm just thinking to come by to your father's house…" I said a little worried "You know to check up on him"
"Cas?" Chucked Dean "Are you falling for my old man?"
"Maybe" I laughed "Jealous?"
"Very much" Continued Dean embracing me and burying his nose on my hair "Cas… I'm kind of afraid…"
"Why?"
"You know, living in secret like this…"
"I know…"
"Then why we don't…" Dean trailed off
"No Dean" I answered in the sweetest tone possible "There will be repercussions… Severe ones"
"I wanted to say to 'hell with that!'…" Continued Dean almost whispering "But I know you would be upset"
"I would" I laughed "Dean, I love you… Isn't that enough?"
"Yes… But…" Dean smiled and stood in silence, I could hear him breathing relieved; I turned and embraced him feeling his smell. "You are right, Cas… That would be complicated… Too much complicated to handle right now…"