This picks up directly from the shooting in the beautifully crafted canon!AU from 7x06, The Time of Our Lives.
Chapter 1
"Stay with me, Mr. Castle. Castle, please. Stay with me."
She pleads over and over as she tugs her phone from her pocket, calling 911 as fast as she can. When she's been assured an ambulance is on its way, she drops the phone to the ground, focusing her attention completely on the man beneath her.
His eyes flutter, and a deep groan that sounds suspiciously like "Kate" bubbles up from his throat.
"No. No! Castle, come on. Don't leave me." She pushes hard, one hand on each gunshot wound, thick, warm blood gurgling up and squeezing between her fingers as tears press against her eyes. But she won't cry. Not yet. A bus is on its way. Help is coming if she can just keep him here for a little while longer.
Because she absolutely refuses to let him die.
Whatever has happened the last couple of days, she's not ready to give him up. This man, with his crazy stories, knowing things that he shouldn't know, saying things he shouldn't be able to say, breaking through to her in ways that no one else ever has; he can't leave. He can't just show up, turn her world upside down and inside out, and expect to walk away, to abandon her without giving up any answers.
Hell no.
He's held her gaze since he hit the ground, his lids drooping as he fights off the loss of consciousness, but, with the passage of time, each blink gets longer and longer until he doesn't open his eyes again. The sound of a siren breaks through her begging and the fog of helplessness in her brain, and she screams, "Here! We're here!" desperate for someone with better field training, with more knowledge to save him.
Her heart cracks, a lone tear dripping from each eye as she watches him begin to fade away, and, keeping the pressure on the wounds, she leans forward, breathing him in just in case.
Just in case this is the only chance she'll ever get.
She drops a kiss on his cheek, the skin warm and soft beneath her lips, and she whispers assurances in his ear until the EMTs peel her away, stepping into her place as they assess the damage and load him up. Swift and efficient, as professionals should be. As she should be.
But something has changed. Something. Him. He has reached deep into her heart, pulling emotion and pain from places she'd long since buried, covered with layers of limestone, brick, and steel, and he's exposed her most vulnerable parts. She's no longer rational, no longer professional. No longer a cop, or a captain.
She's just a woman watching a man who came from nowhere, who just said he loves her, who looks at her in ways no one ever has before, dying because he'd sacrificed himself to save her. It's too much. She's done nothing to deserve this.
Frozen in place, she watches them strap the gurney down, one team member jumping behind the wheel, one pulling supplies from this drawer and that, while a third straddles Castle's waist, his hands pressing down where Kate's had just been as he tries to keep as much blood inside as possible. But when the door starts to shut behind them, she startles into action, racing forward.
"Wait. Wait, please."
The man stops, a look of annoyance and I don't have time for this written all over his face, and she knows, damn it, she knows he doesn't have time, but she has to ask.
"Ma'am, there's no room and we have to go if you want him to live."
"I know. I know, I'm sorry. Just, what hospital?"
"Mount Sinai."
His words are clipped and harsh, only a miniscule trace of sympathy in his eyes as he slams the door, the ambulance roaring away, leaving her with three dead criminals and a murder to put to bed.
Her knees give out, the pavement hard and unforgiving as she collapses under the weight of what just happened, and tears leak from her eyes, burning tracks on her cheeks. Taking deep breaths, the oxygen does nothing to calm the beat of her heart, the ache in her chest, and she bangs her fist on the ground, leaving a bloody print behind. The red mark brings her up short, shocking her out of the whirlpool of panic.
She has to get to him, has to be there when he wakes up. If he asks for her, if he wants her at all…
She has to be there.
Grabbing her phone from where it rests on the ground, bloody fingerprints appearing wherever her fingers touch, she calls Espo. It rings once before his distracted voice comes over the line.
"Esposito."
"Espo."
"Captain?" She hears his chair creak as he sits up, his full attention on her, and she imagines his face transforming, readying himself for whatever she may ask. He's always been so loyal, since their days as a detective team, since they were running the streets together, and she's never been so grateful for that than she is now.
"Grab Ryan and get down to the coal plant. I have the rest of the story and three dead bodies for you."
"Three? Jesus, Cap'. What the hell happened?"
"Just do it. I'll explain when you get here."
She ends the call, dropping her cell to the pavement as her eyes close. She needs this time to get herself together, to move away from Kate and back into Captain Beckett.
To get her head back in the game.
After all, she still has a job to do, and the job always comes first.
She finally makes it to Mount Sinai two hours later. It's longer than she wanted, longer than she'd meant, but procedure is procedure and every step takes time. Ryan and Esposito have taken the reins at the crime scene, fully capable of wrapping it all up and getting their reports written back at the Twelfth without her supervision, so now she's here, hesitantly stepping through the doors of the ER, terrified of what she'll find.
He can't be dead.
She stops just inside, her eyes scanning the waiting room for…something. She's not sure what. Has the hospital notified his family? Should she have done it? A moment of panic takes over as she imagines what that news would have sounded like to them, his mother and daughter.
Kate has been on the receiving end of those words; she knows what it's like to have someone you've never met destroy your entire world with just a simple phrase.
Your mother has been murdered.
Your father has been shot.
At least, in this case, in Castle's case, there's hope left. There's a chance he's not gone, and that's what pushes her to the receptionist's desk.
"Excuse me."
The older woman looks up, a pleasant, open smile on her face, and Kate offers a small one back. It's all she can muster under the weight of the unknown.
"Can I help you?"
"Yes." She brushes her coat to the side, tapping the badge clipped to her belt. "Captain Kate Beckett, NYPD. I'm looking for a patient. A Mr. Richard Castle. Brought in with a gun shot wound to the chest."
"I'm sorry, but I can't release confidential information regarding a patient to anyone who isn't family."
The nurse has the decency to look apologetic, but the conviction in her eyes is obvious. She is dedicated to her job and the privacy of her patients, but Kate doesn't have time for this and she has a moment of silent gratitude that her authority outweighs this woman's.
"It's official business. He's a vital witness in an open NYPD investigation, and I need to know the status of his condition immediately."
She's proud of how steady her voice comes out, how strong she sounds despite the fact that she's barely keeping it together on the inside. The desire to just grab the computer and search for his name on her own grows stronger with every moment she stands here, but finally the woman nods as she begins typing.
"Uh. Looks like he's still in surgery. No more information than that I'm afraid, but if he has any family here they'll be in the waiting room down the hall."
The nurse points to the left, toward an empty corridor lined with closed doors and fluorescent lighting, and Kate absorbs this information. His family. Is she ready to face them? To show them comfort and support when she herself is in such desperate need of it? She's not sure she'll have anything to offer them, but she also knows she can't sit out here alone, not when he jumped in front of a bullet to save her and is currently fighting to get his own life back.
Turning to the desk again, Kate nods at the nurse. "Thank you," she says before she faces the hallway, striding toward the secluded waiting room with a confidence she doesn't feel.
Five doors down on the right, there's a plaque on the wall that reads "Surgical Waiting", and she pauses with her hand outstretched toward the sleek metal handle, taking a moment to peek through the only uncovered window into the room.
It's empty save for two women, one older with fiery red hair and a bright pink and orange patterned dress, and one younger, no more than twenty or so, with long black hair and pale skin. They are silent, both staring at the floor, unmoving in their vigil until the younger girl's blue eyes suddenly land on Kate. There is a question in the tilt of her head, the pinch of her mouth, and Kate takes a stuttered breath at being caught, at the intensity of those blue eyes, so perfectly matched to Castle's.
This must be his daughter.
Kate blinks, realizing she must look like a lunatic standing in the hall, staring at them, and she grasps the handle, pushing the door open and stepping into the utter silence of the room. The noise of the door clicking shut attracts the older woman's attention as well, and Kate's steps falter as they both settle their gazes on her.
But, no. She can do this. She will be strong for them if she can just get to a chair, give her knees a chance to rest before they give out on her completely. It's going to be okay.
They track her movements across the room, neither saying a word even as she settles into a chair directly across from them, but that's when she notices the puffy redness around the younger girl's eyes, her fingers twisting in her lap in agitation and restlessness. Kate sees so much of her younger self in this girl, precariously balancing on the edge of the abyss that only opens when the death of a parent hovers near, and she has to clench her hands into fists to keep from reaching for her.
Instead she speaks, the sound of her voice cracking the silence and startling them all. "Are you Richard Castle's family?"
"And you are?"
It's the older woman who asks, and Kate tears her gaze away from the girl's, clearing her throat to answer.
"Captain Kate Beckett, NYPD. I was with him when- I was there. I just wanted to know how he was doing and see if either of you needed anything."
"Beckett?"
This time it's the younger girl who speaks, the confusion transforming her features as she thinks, as though she's trying to make sense of something that's plagued her for a while.
"Uh, yes. Kate Beckett. Mr. Castle was helping me with a case."
"He's been talking about you. The last couple of days. Who are you to him?"
She laughs a startled mirthless sound because she's been wondering the exact same thing since the moment he'd arrived in her precinct.
"I honestly don't know. He showed up in my precinct two days ago, claiming all sorts of things that can't possibly be true. I'd never met him before that so your guess is as good as mine."
"Well, darling, I haven't seen that kind of passion and enthusiasm emanating from him in years so if you had something to do with that change then you are more than welcome here. I am Martha, his mother, and this is Alexis, his daughter."
Kate feels her cheeks heat up at Martha's words, her pulse quickening at the easy acceptance from this woman. There's no way she could have made such a difference in him in such a short time - she doesn't even know him - but she finds the light smile, the gratitude shining in Martha's eyes easing the tension along her shoulders.
"It's a pleasure to meet you both although I wish it were under better circumstances. Have you heard anything yet?"
Alexis sits forward, her head tilted to the side and her expression closed off, much harder than her grandmother's, although Kate can't blame her.
"Nothing, except that the surgery could take a few hours. Two bullets to the chest."
Kate nods. Knowing several people who have been shot in the line of duty during her years on the force, she's no stranger to gun shot recovery. But before she can say anything more, Alexis continues.
"So how did you guys meet? Seems like you came out of nowhere."
"He did, really. Came out of nowhere. For me, anyway. He just showed up at the precinct. Claimed a lot of things that aren't true, that can't possibly be true-"
"Like what?"
Meeting Alexis' eyes, Kate pauses, trying to decide whether or not to share the fantastical tales that Castle had been telling her, the fact that it felt as though they'd known each other forever even though they'd just met.
How does she explain to his family that he may be certifiably insane, and yet he made her feel whole, loved, for the first time in almost sixteen years? Since her mother's murder had shattered her existence, reducing her to a shell of the woman she was growing up to be? How can she put into words the spark that had flickered to life under his gaze, his smile, when she can't even explain it to herself?
"He told me that he was from a parallel universe?"
It comes out as a question, because his story is ridiculous and impossible, but she's baffled to find that neither woman looks surprised in the least. Instead they both wait patiently for her to continue, as though they had been expecting this, had already known that's how he'd felt.
"He said that, where he came from, he and I were together. That we'd met six years ago on another case where someone was killing and matching the crime scenes to those found in his books. He said I was the one that worked that case, that he helped me with the solve and the experience had blossomed into a consultation with the NYPD."
"I remember that case. But it wasn't you. It was another detective. Mc-something. A male detective. It wasn't you, and he didn't consult after that case was solved," Alexis says, her voice quiet and withdrawn, her brow furrowed in confusion.
"Right. Detective McNulty was assigned that case. I was also working at the Twelfth as a detective at the time, but he never worked…not with me. But he'd seemed so sure… He'd believed it so fiercely when he was telling me about it that I don't know what to think."
Martha shakes her head as a soft smile plays across her lips. "That's my son. Always was a storyteller. Always finding inspiration in the most unlikely of sources. Perhaps he inadvertently came across you, found something in the idea of you that's awakened his imagination once again. Whatever it is, my dear, I am glad you're here."
To Elena, because apparently flattery will get you everywhere. ;)
And to Kylie and Jo, my beta dream team, thank you for your love, your unwavering acceptance of my quirks, and your beautiful smiles. This would be nothing without you both by my sides. xo