Dear diary,
As expected from a doctor, Will Solace noticed me suffering, and suggested I start something as cliche as a diary. He said it'd relieve some of the psychological pain I felt.
Psychological pain.
I guess that's one way to put it.
Percy and Annabeth's daughter, Silena... She's a splitting image of Bianca. Bianca with blonde hair and sea-green eyes. She acts like her, she talks like her... Will noticed this too, and even had to nerve to joke about her being my daughter. He'd known Bianca through the spat between the Hunters of Artemis and the Apollo cabin all those years ago, and he'd been the first to remark on the similarity between Silena Jackson and "one of them hunters".
When she looks at me... When she calls me Uncle Nico and hugs me when she meets me... It hurts.
It hurts like hell.
And believe me, if someone knows what hurting in hell feels like, it's me.
She acts so much like Bianca. When she stuffs her hair into a cap and wears sunglasses, it's like Bianca was reborn all over again. I gave her an olive coloured beanie for her birthday, just to see.
Just one more time.
I want to see Bianca one more time.
Even if it's only through a girl born from the union between a man who I liked and a woman who everyone had assumed I had a crush on.
Now she wears it almost everyday.
Now I wish I hadn't given it to her.
I just...
The pain.
It hurts.
I think I need medication.
This one is from my headcanon concerning Bianca finally reborn through a bond Nico was once part of. I've known a lot of pain in my life, and I've decided I wanted to portray that pain through a way I could relate to.
We can't choose not to suffer in our lifetimes.
But we can choose who gets to make us suffer.
So love me/hate me/favorite me/follow me/review this/and PM me.
And a extra message for those who go through a similar sort of pain as I do,
I can relate.
Even if it's just a little.
So speak up.
You have a voice.
Use it.