Chapter 11:
Coward, Jubilee thought as she heard the door click closed behind Logan. She kept her gaze locked with Laura's, not wanting to be the first to look away. The other woman looked older. Like Logan, she seemed to have aged to her mid-thirties before her healing factor had kicked in to practically remove any signs of further aging. She wore her blue black hair cropped short now in a pixie cut with a few wisps that were longer framing each side of her face. She'd filled out more, her body still just as muscular but with more defined curves. She wore a leather jacket that went to mid-thigh, black leather pants, and a white, button-down shirt that she'd topped off with a loose, peach colored scarf with tiny white birds on it.
Jubilee wasn't sure how long she stood there, but it was long after her knuckles had turned white from gripping the back of the chair. Finally, Laura reached down to pick up Jubilee's cup of coffee and held it out to her, a challenge clear in the gesture. Jubilee paused only a moment before releasing her death grip on the chair to step around the table and take the mug. When she'd accepted it, Laura finally broke the stare long enough to take a sip from her own drink.
Choosing not to sit, Jubilee took a step back (out of striking distance), to lean against the counter as she took drink of the warm, creamy liquid. In the silence, both women recalled the last time they'd seen each other.
Jubilee had been hanging at one of the seedier clubs in Chicago, surrounded by humans who were drugged out of their minds, looking for answers at the end of a needle or at the bottom of a bottle. She didn't care if they found their answers or not. She just knew they were easy pickings, and she could often get an added buzz from their blood. She had her head shaved and had multiple piercings in her ears. She wore next to nothing: ripped jeans that were cut short and a hot pink bra under a fishnet shirt. She certainly looked as if she fit right in with the regular clientele.
So far that evening, she had already put three of the poor suckers out of their misery and didn't even feel the thirst for blood anymore. Still, she hadn't finished hunting for the night. She was scoping out her next victim when a woman stepped in front of her.
Waving a hand in the woman's face, Jubilee didn't even bother to look at her. "Sorry, sweetie," She slurred, feeling the effects of the drugs and alcohol she'd ingested as well as the secondhand thrill she'd got from the human blood. "Not interested in another girl tonight. Look somewhere else."
Perhaps she should have looked up, because then she'd have had the chance to brace for the punch that knocked her off her stool and onto the sticky floor. The girl stood over her, dark blue, angry eyes glaring down at her. Eyes that were so familiar. She was so distracted trying to figure out why they looked so familiar that she didn't bother trying to struggle to her feet. Frustrated, the woman reached down to lift her to her feet to punch her again.
Okay. Now this was getting annoying. This bitch was totally killing her buzz. "Fuck off," Jubilee said, half-heartedly blocking the next punch. In the process though, she missed the kick that hit her in the abdomen that sent her flying into a nearby table. Patrons scattered and formed a loose circle around them. She pushed herself to her feet, her red eyes glaring through the pink shades she wore. The woman strode closer, and Jubilee forced her eyes to focus, still struggling to gain any sense of her surroundings with the drug-laden blood still circulating in her system. It was then that she recognized the face. She stood up straight from her crouch, grabbing at one of the stools that was nearby to help with her balance. "X," she spat the name out, not caring that the other woman had abandoned that name years before.
Laura responded by charging her again, blades springing from each hand as she swung at her. Jubilee just laughed, the drugged effects fading slightly as adrenaline coursed through her. She couldn't remember the last time she'd fought. She'd stopped feeding from anything that put up a fight years prior. She decided she might actually enjoy this. She was able to evade the girls' swipes, which should have warned her that the assassin was here for some other reason than to kill her.
A few bouncers had joined the ring of spectators, deciding not to interfere once they saw Laura's hardware. Instead, they just tried to keep people back. Bets were already being placed, and shouts of encouragement came from the crowd. It seemed to distract and annoy Laura, but it spurred Jubilee into action. She ducked her head and ran forward, charging the other girl and body slamming her to the floor.
"Bitch," Laura swore before easily kicking the other girl off. Vampire strength and speed wasn't enough when Jubilee still wasn't coherent enough to use it properly. Jubilee jumped to her feet and charged at her again, but Laura easily dodged this time, backflipping out of the way and kicking at Jubilee's face in the process. Again, the fact that that deadly blade hadn't appeared on the edge of her boot was a clue that Jubilee ignored.
It was her turn to swear when the kick sent her glasses flying from her head. As her red eyes were revealed, new bets were placed from the surrounding audience. There went her chances of scoring another easy kill for the night. "You're going to pay for that," Jubilee promised as she charged again.
This time, Laura looked bored and simply stepped aside to clothesline the vampire. Jubilee laid on her back for a second too long, the breath knocked out of her. Laura placed one booted foot on her neck, the blade now springing forth to press into the underside of Jubilee's jaw. Laura leaned forward, resting her weight on that leg so that the blade began to pierce the skin. Very quietly, she spoke, knowing the other woman would hear her even with the shouts that surrounded them. "Now you listen to me," she growled. "I heard about you sneaking around the X-Men and the threat you made to Remy." She leaned closer so that her face was about a foot away from Jubilee's. "If I ever hear of you coming anywhere near the X-Men, or the Jean Grey School, I will kill you, but I'll make you miserable first. Your death will be one that I draw out for a long time, and you'll regret the day you turned into such a miserable creature."
When Jubilee began to laugh, Laura pulled back, confused. Jubilee used the opportunity to grab Laura's foot with her hands and twist. She easily broke the bone and rolled away as the other girl fell to the floor. Scowling, Laura re-set the bone of her foot as Jubilee sprang to her feet, her hands on her hips. Shaking her head, she said, "As if I didn't already regret it…." She smiled and rolled her eyes. "You can't scare me, X." She stressed the name purposefully, her lips curved into a nasty smirk.
Laura remained on the floor for just long enough for her ankle to begin to knit itself back together. Her patience was wearing thin, and besides, she'd passed along the message that had caused her to search out her former friend. She got to her feet and easily knocked the other girl down again by feinting left but performing a powerful uppercut from the right. Jubilee flew into the air and then landed with a heavy thud on the floor.
Laura picked her up off the floor and held her up in the air by one arm, shaking her as if she were a rag doll. She held one of the sharp adamantium blades against Jubilee's throat and growled, "I'd do the world a favor by cutting your head off!"
Jubilee smiled toothily, making sure that her fangs showed, her red eyes daring the girl to do it, almost begging her to fulfill that promise. Instead, Laura just pushed her away so that she fell back onto the floor again. She looked down at her with pity and just shook her head. "You don't even deserve an honorable death. You disgust me. I meant what I said, keep your distance, or next time I will kill you." With those parting words, Laura turned on her heel and stalked out of the club.
They hadn't seen each other again since that night.
Laura glanced at the window over the sink, which was covered with heavy drapes. She knew Logan wanted them to make up. He had hated that Laura had never been understanding about what Jubilee had been going through, that she still held so much against her. Sighing, she pushed herself off the counter and stood beside the other girl. "Jubilee," she began.
Jubilee shook her head, "No." She took a few steps away to the living area. She retrieved a few pieces of wood to add to the fire, pushing the mattress out of the way with her foot. "I need to talk first."
Laura sighed but shrugged out of her jacket and settled in the comfortable armchair. It normally smelled of Logan's musky scent, but now Jubilee's scent clung to it as well. She wrinkled her nose, comparing the vampire smell to that of burning. The bitterness rose up in her, and she tried to push it down. It was Logan's decision who he welcomed into his home. She crossed one leg over the other, her bobbing foot the only sign that she was anxious for the other girl to continue.
Jubilee adjusted the fresh logs over the flames, using a poker to nudge them into the exact position she wanted. Both women knew she was stalling. Finally, Jubilee turned to face her, her jaw clenched tightly and wariness filling her ruby gaze. Laura's foot stopped bobbing when it was clear the other woman was going to speak.
"I'm sorry." The words were clipped as Jubilee said them, so Laura didn't respond. She knew she would forgive the other girl, if only for the fact that it would please Logan, but Laura had no plans on making it easy on her. And she was far from ready.
After a few moments of silence, Jubilee pushed at her hair, forgetting it was tied back in a ponytail, and causing it to pop free from its restraint. She just looked down at the band as it bounced across the floor. She paced a few steps, Laura's silence obviously wearing on her. Finally, she stopped in front of her again. "You certainly aren't going to make this easy on me, are you?" Laura only raised an eyebrow in response.
Finally, Jubilee dropped down to sit on the edge of the mattress, staring at the floor for a moment before meeting the blue gaze. "I know it's not enough. I know you're upset with me for a lot of different things-for leaving, for what I did to Remy, for what I did at the school, and for..." she paused to swallow hard, "...and for hurting Logan over and over."
Laura looked away from the guilt that showed so clearly on the vampire's features. She didn't want to see it. She wasn't ready to forgive her so easily. There could be no compassion at this point. "It's not good enough." She said simply. "You can't just fix things with words."
Jubilee sighed and ran her hands through her hair again, grabbing a fistful and tugging hard in her frustration. "I know that, Laura! What do you think I'm trying to do here?"
Laura shrugged in response and said nothing. She gritted her own teeth, not wanting to feel any sort of sympathy for Jubilee, and at the same time, trying her best not to give her own anger free reign. She felt as if her emotions were tearing her in too many different directions at one time.
Jubilee took a few deep breaths and let her head sag forward into her hands. "I know you don't believe me. I know you think I'm here to get what I need from Logan and to run, but it's different this time. I want to have a normal life."
"Fuck you," Laura spoke the words evenly and coldly, causing Jubilee's head to jerk upward to meet her gaze. Laura held her relaxed pose in the chair, though her hands were fisted in her lap, the only sign of the seething anger that was filling her. "Fuck. You. Jubilee. Listen to yourself, whining about how you're going to change and live a normal life. You don't deserve a fucking normal life. You don't deserve Logan's - -" she paused as she searched for words, "You don't deserve whatever it is he's giving you right now."
There was an awkward moment of silence. She could see the anger leap into Jubilee's expression but almost as quickly disappear. Her shoulders slumped in defeat, so Laura continued, "I could forgive you for the killing because we both know I've probably got a body count that mirrors yours, but I can't forgive what you've done to the people who cared about you. When Remy came home," she paused to take a deep breath, to shake her head to try to clear the memories from her head yet still seeing his battered body, the marks on his neck, and the emotional pain in his eyes. When she continued, she spoke through gritted teeth. "Of every person who went after you, how you hurt them. And for what you did to Logan," she shook her head again, "What you did to him is worse of all." When Jubilee looked confused, Laura laughed mirthlessly. "You stupid bitch, you don't even know do you? You didn't even bother to look at him when you sucked the life out of him these past years."
Finally, she pushed herself to her feet and paced away, back to the kitchen, then to the couch, and then back. She gritted her fists, fighting to keep the sharp adamantium spikes where they belonged, buried. She longed to let them free, to hurt Jubilee, to take out the anger and frustration she'd felt all this time on her. Jubilee remained silent, her own hands fisted at her side as she watched Laura pace anxiously. When Laura finally stopped to look on her, she saw for the first time true pain on the girl's face.
Taking pity on her, Laura explained, "He left everyone. All of us, Jubilee. Kitty, me, everyone. We still needed him. You know he was a father to so many of us. And I'm not even talking about coming up here. It happened a long time before that, about the same time as we started hearing stories about you - - about what you'd become. He lost all focus. He wasn't himself. He wasn't happy. He was a fucking shell. He went through the motions of everything at the school, but he wasn't Logan. He didn't laugh or tease. It was like he'd lost the will to...do anything." She stopped speaking abruptly as the wave of anger, frustration, and most of all sadness swept through her at the memory. "We all did everything we could think of to try to help him, to bring him back. It was part of the reason why Remy went after you, to make you see. You wouldn't even listen to him." She clenched her fists and turned away from Jubilee, not wanting to see the clear agony on her features. "In all the time that any of us knew him, you managed to do the one thing that no one else ever has." She turned her blazing gaze back to Jubilee, "You broke him. You made him feel as if he'd failed, and you didn't give a shit either way."
Jubilee shook her head in pained denial. No. She would have noticed when she came to see him. She wouldn't have been so selfish to have missed such a change. Right?
Laura shook her head and laughed, "You didn't even notice, did you? Or he put a hell of an act on for you. He tried to pretend everything was fine with us. We tried to pretend along with him. Ororo said he needed the time to come to terms with your decisions, and we tried to give him whatever support we could, but he didn't want it. He was too busy being strong. When he realized he wasn't fooling us, that's when he left to come up here, where he didn't have to put on the act any longer. He ran away from everyone who depended on him because all he could think about what how he'd failed you."
Laura turned back to look at the girl and was surprised to see red tracks streaking down her cheeks from bloody tears. Jubilee dropped her head into her hands, her shoulders wracked with harsh sobs. Laura felt something in her chest twist, and she fought against the sympathy she began to feel. She turned away to move back to the kitchen, twitching the heavy curtain aside to look out into the snow-covered clearing. Logan was nowhere to be seen. She looked back at the still weeping girl, anger rising up in her. What good did her tears do now? Without another word, she moved to the door and walked outside to leave Jubilee alone.
It didn't take Laura long to find Logan. He had taken the truck along a bumpy path into the woods and had gone quite a distance, most likely to give them some privacy. When she found him, his coat was draped over the tailgate, and he was splitting wood with his claws. He looked at her, glanced behind her, and frowned. "Where's Jubilee?"
Laura's frustration finally bubbled to the surface, "Really? Is she the only thing you care about?"
He sighed, tossing a few sticks of wood into the back of the truck. "Do we really have to go through this again?"
Laura ground her teeth, "I don't think we've ever really 'gone through it,' Logan."
He pointed to half of the downed tree, "Work out your frustration before you need dental work," She glared at his attempt at humor but took his advice, attacking the tree with her own claws.
He waited for her to get a few good swipes out before he commented, "It's different this time."
She made a disgusted sound in her throat, "You have been oblivious to any of her faults for years." He tossed a few more pieces of sliced wood into the truck, not answering her accusation. Finally, she spoke again, "What makes it different?"
He paused in the act of reaching for more split pieces to meet her angry gaze, the color a mirror image of his own. Quietly, he said, "She told me it was."
Laura laughed bitterly. "You have got to be kidding me."
He straightened and wiped some of the sweat from his forehead with the tail of his shirt. "Laura, Jubilee is many things, but we both know she ain't a liar. I know you blame her, but she has never lied to me or given me false hope."
"Yeah," Laura said, her tone still acidic, "You've always been good at doing that all on your own."
He continued as if she hadn't spoken, "She hasn't ever wanted to try before, and she's been working up to this. It wasn't an overnight decision."
Laura rolled her eyes and attacked a rather large, knotty piece of wood, enjoying the resistance the knots caused.
She heard him approach, but didn't stop in her movements until she felt his hand on her shoulder. She stood up stiffly, staring down at the sliced pieces of wood that were so small they could only serve as kindling.
"Laura, you have to forgive her at some point." his words were quiet. "If you don't want to do it for her, that's fine. But I need you to do it for me. Because I'm selfish, and I need her to get through this. I have always loved her, just like I love you, but..." he trailed off, "But now it's different."
She clenched her fists so hard she could feel her fingernails biting into the skin of her palms. She didn't want to hear about it, about how special Jubilee was, about how much she meant to him. Laura had been aware of that since she'd first met him, hoping he might be the father figure she had never had. She'd known that she wouldn't ever measure up to the other girl, and it had always hurt to know that she was runner up even after she and Jubilee had become friends.
"Laura," he said her name quietly, his hand moving from her shoulder, down her arm, down to take her hand into his. His fingers gently pried her fingers apart, his soothing the raw, already-healing half-moons her nails had made. "Laura," he said her name again as he pulled her against him and into his arms. "You have to let the anger go. All of it." He paused, his hands soothing down her back slowly in an attempt to make her stiff body soften. Gradually, she did, resting her head against the crook of his neck, so she easily heard his softly whispered plea, "For me."
Author's note: Hope you're enjoying the story so far. We're finally getting to the point where Jubilee is going to have to pay the piper for some of what she's done in the past. It won't be easy for her (or Logan or Laura for that matter). Please keep the reviews coming! I'm a little behind on my writing, but I'll try to catch up in time for Wednesday's post.