Chapter 14:
Logan leaned back against the headboard of the bed in Remy's guest room. They were somewhere in France; he hasn't paid much attention as they were coming in. His focus has begun solely on Jubilee over these past few days as they had hurriedly planned the trip to Europe. It had been a whirlwind of activity as they had had to juggle flights and layovers so that they only travelled at night. Between that and the tension that seemed to be building within a distant and brooding Jubilee, it had been an exhausting trip.
Logan had managed some fitful sleep on the drive from the airport to the house, only waking when the car had come to a complete stop. It was a two-story structure made of stone with wraparound porches on the ground and upper level. The inside was decorated beautifully, if not a little overdone to Logan's taste. They'd been shown to the guest room, and he'd been happy that there hadn't seemed to have been a question of putting him and Jubilee in the same room. Her mental state had been slowly deteriorating as she'd had to deal with seeing Remy (who she hadn't said more than a few words to) and the stress of leaving behind the safety and the security of the cabin. He hadn't wanted to let her out of his sight.
She was filled with nervous energy that was showing even now as she paced back and forth in front of him in the room. They had had plenty of opportunities to be alone as they'd made preparations, packed, and traveled, but she'd been silent despite his attempts to draw her into conversation.
"Want to go for a quick run before the sun comes up?" he asked. She didn't look at him and only shook her head in response as she stopped short at a wall and turned to retrace her steps across the room. Luckily, it was a sizable guest suite decorated in muted browns and greens with French doors opening out onto the balcony on two of the walls. She had plenty of room to roam. "…'Cause you seem like you need to work off some energy..." he continued as she paced.
She just kept on ignoring him, pacing from one end of the room to the other, and then back again. He sighed and folded his hands behind his head as he observed her. It had seemed as if she'd been on the verge of bolting since she'd laid eyes on Remy. She fidgeted with her hands as she walked, wringing them in front of her. They all had known that something terrible had gone down between the two of them, but neither Remy or Jubilee had spoken of it.
Remy had been one of the first to go after Jubilee when it was clear she wasn't planning on returning to the school. He'd only been gone a day or two before they'd received a call from a hospital. Logan had been one of the ones who had traveled into New York City to the ICU where he'd been taken. The Critical Care Nurse had explained that he'd barely been alive when he'd been brought to the ER. He had been beaten badly, and when Logan and the others had seen him, he had been covered in bandages around his torso where there had been multiple broken ribs, along his arms, around his head to help with a large gash, and especially around his neck. During one of the times the nurses had changed the bandages there, Logan's strong stomach had been tested. The skin of his neck had looked like ground hamburger. Thinking about that wound made Logan's gut tighten all over again. He shook his head to clear the memory. Remy had refused to talk about it despite everyone's persistent questions, and Logan had never asked Jubilee. If he was honest, part of him really hadn't wanted to know the truth about what had happened.
She was still pacing, shaking her hands out as if trying to shake something from them, her dark brows drawn together in a scowl. He sighed and pushed himself to his feet. She shot a glance at him but then returned her attention to the pacing. He waited for her to pass in front of him before reaching out to grab her arm to slam her hard against at the wall. He ignored the sound of shattering glass when the force knocked a picture frame loose. Jubilee looked at him in surprise and then resumed scowling at him.
"You're starting to make me crazy," he explained. She moved as if to escape his grasp, so he tightened his hands on her shoulders, taking a step closer to pin her against the wall with his body as well. She still didn't speak, just glared up at him. He sighed and rested his forehead against hers, the gentle gesture a sharp contrast to the force he held her captive with. "Listen, you gotta get it together and deal with this." He pressed a soft kiss to her lips, "This is what it's all about, kid. Getting back on the horse, making amends, moving on, ya know?"
She sighed, and the hands that had been pressing against his chest slid down and around his waist. "Yeah," was her soft response.
"I'm not goin' anywhere. So you just have to let me know what I gotta do to help you get your head on straight."
She made a soft "Mmmm" sound that might have been in agreement, and then turned her head toward the doors leading outside. The sky was just beginning to lighten, signaling the start of day. She sighed and closed her eyes. He could feel her fist her hands in his shirt and could practically feel the frustration radiating from her body.
He slid one hand up her shoulder and around the back of her neck. When she opened her eyes to look at him, he smiled wolfishly. "You do know there are a lot of different ways to work off nerves..." he trailed off as he pressed his body more tightly against hers, angling his hips so that they nestled between hers. He watched as her eyes sparked in interest and her hands spread out against his back to press him closer. He smiled and leaned down to kiss her hard, his fingers tightening on her neck in the process.
Jubilee hitched one leg up so that it was wrapped around his waist and turned her head to the side to break the kiss. When she looked at him, her eyes were serious. "I don't know that this is the best idea. I've got a lot of...tension," she paused, "And not a whole hell of a lot of control."
He smiled and bent forward to nip at her ear lobe, purposefully nipping hard enough that it would hurt. He felt her body tense against his, and her fingers dig into his back. He kissed her again before saying, "I can take whatever you can throw at me, kid. You know that."
She hesitated just a moment before smiling and slipping her arms up and around his neck. When she wrapped both of her legs tightly around his waist, one of his hands moved down to cup her bottom to help hold her against him, his upper body still pressing her against the wall. "I don't know," she said teasingly as her fingers twined into the hair at the nape of his neck and tugged harder than necessary, "I might surprise you, old man."
He laughed at the clear taunt, though it quickly became a moan as she jerked his head back roughly and struck hard at his neck.
Later, Logan joined Remy on the raised outdoor deck. The sun was still up, so Jubilee was inside, and he could see Laura swimming in the pool below, her arms cutting through the water in long strokes. He settled into the Adirondack chair next to the Cajun and cracked open a can of beer.
Remy waited for his guest to settle, his gaze trained on Laura's form as she reached the end of the pool, dove lower, kicked off the wall, and began another lap. He took a drink of his own glass, a nicely aged red wine, before he commented, "We was sure you two were tryin' to kill each other dis mornin'. You know de sayin': You break it you buy it, non?"
Logan chuckled, a slight flush of color creeping up his neck. He took another drink to cover his embarrassment. Things had gotten pretty intense that morning, their lovemaking feeling more like a fight to the death at some points, though those moments of extreme violence had often been followed by Jubilee's laughter. It had been an emotional rollercoaster, that had been for sure…and some things had definitely been broken. But he was sure it had been what she'd needed. At the end of it, she'd smiled at him, cuddled against his side in a way she hadn't for years, and whispered "Thank you," before falling into a deep sleep. Clearing his throat and averting his gaze, he said, "Sorry 'bout that. We're used to being on our own."
Remy nodded and slid a slow glance in his direction, amusement in his dark eyes, "Dat be true." He paused, watching as Laura surfaced to take a few gulps of air at the nearer end of the pool. She slicked the water off of her face and glanced up at them. After a slight frown upon seeing Logan, she turned to begin another lap. He waited for her to dive beneath the water to comment, "Remy think de whole thing upset Laura more dan she like to admit."
Logan grunted, a frown marring his features. He watched the woman in the pool complete another two laps, only coming up for air once at the far end and not looking in their direction again. Eventually, he glanced toward the other man, who was now studying him instead of Laura. "Why?" he asked.
Remy lifted one shoulder, "Why you think?"
Logan sighed and let his head drop back against the chair, "With those two, nothin' makes sense."
Remy chuckled, but didn't respond. They both watched Laura tirelessly cut through the water for a few more trips along the pool's length. Finally, he drained what was left of his wine and pushed to his feet. He grabbed his cane and headed back toward the French doors. He paused before going in, "Remy and Jubilee overdue for a talk. Why don't you do de same wit' Laura?"
Logan frowned down at the pool as he heard the door close after Remy. Laura's arms continued to cut into the water's surface as she stroked back and forth across the pool. He watched her for a while, his brows drawn sharply together. He had never been one to avoid difficult situations, preferring to face everything head on (often with unsheathed claws), but with Laura, it was different. He had battled conflicting feelings about her since the beginning. Sometimes, he felt like they should be closer, but other times, when he looked at her, it was like looking into a mirror that revealed too much and that should be avoided.
He'd done his best with her. As soon as he had the thought, he pushed it away. That was a lie. If he was honest with himself, he hadn't done nearly enough. Hell, he hadn't even noticed when she didn't call for months while she'd been held captive by that lunatic.* What kind of person didn't notice something like that? And then there was the fact that Remy hadn't even called on him to help extract her. He pushed those thoughts away, not wanting to dwell on that tidbit. Rubbing his hands over his face, he pushed to his feet. He needed to do better by her, and the first step was to make the effort to smooth whatever ruffled feathers currently existed. More than that, it likely meant he'd have to be open to talking with her about what was going on between him and Jubilee.
He stood to watch her make another lap before turning to move down a set of spiral stairs. When he stood at the edge of the pool, he couldn't help smirking as she continued with her swim. After a brief moment of eye contact, he knew she'd seen him standing there and was purposefully showing her annoyance by ignoring him. He crossed his arms over his chest as he waited. After a few more laps, he tugged a cigar from the breast pocket of his shirt and lit it. He could be patient.
Eventually, she stopped near his feet and pulled herself up out of the pool. She ignored him and walked past him to grab a towel from where it hung over the back of a lounger. She kept her back to him as she dried herself and then tugged on a loose, terry cloth robe. He puffed on the cigar leisurely, not letting her rudeness get to him. While he didn't know exactly what was bothering her, he figured he probably deserved it.
Finally, she glanced over her shoulder at him, studying him with darkened eyes for a few moments before walking away to the small bar that was under the upper deck. She slipped behind the bar, ducking to pull a couple of beers out of the cooler. She tossed one at him and then came back around to perch on a stool.
He caught the beer and pried off the top as he moved to sit next to her. She stared past him to look out at the pool. She took a long drink but still did not speak.
"So what's eatin' at ya, kid?" He asked as he set his beer on the bar after one swig and tapped the cigar out in an ashtray. Since she wasn't looking at him, he decided to do the same, focusing his gaze on the empty sitting room inside the sliding glass doors.
She took her time responding, draining most of the beer before swiveling on the stool to face him. "What are you doing?"
He glanced at her with one eyebrow raised, "I'm drinkin' a beer," he responded dryly, picking the bottle up and drinking to make his point. She frowned at him, but didn't say anything more, so he sighed, set the bottle back down and met her gaze. "You're gonna have to be more specific than that, Laura."
She frowned, her lips twisting into a sour grimace. "With her. This morning…" she shook her head as she trailed off, unsure of how to put her feelings into words.
Uncomfortable, he looked back down at the bottle, peeling at the label with a fingernail. His initial response was to tell her it was none of her business, but that wouldn't help resolve anything. Where to even start? He set the bottle down and scrubbed at his eyes with his palms, feeling the weight of her gaze on him. Finally, he began by saying, "It's complicated..." he took another drink before continuing. "She's dealing with a lot right now," When Laura made a choked sound, he glanced at her, "No matter what you and I deal with in our natures, she's got it worse. Whatever it is that makes her a vampire, it isn't just about blood. It's about the violence that comes with it. That's why there are so many of them out there who do nothing but hurt people; it's why they don't all just visit the blood bank. It's a hell of a battle to fight against an instinct like that." He took another long drink, and she turned her face away again to stare at the pool. "That kind of need, it has to find an outlet somewhere."
She clenched her jaw, "So that makes it okay for her to hurt you? For you to hurt her?"
He drained the last of the beer and spun the bottle between his fingers. When he responded, his voice was quiet, "It's better me than someone else."
Laura slammed a fist down on the bar in frustration, "That doesn't make it okay, Logan. You know it doesn't."
He reached over to close his hand over hers, tightening his grip when she attempted to pull away. "Yer still young, Laura. You aren't numb to the pain yet. It takes a lot for it to bother me, and it's fleeting." She shook her head, her jaw clenching hard enough for him to hear her jaw bone crack in protest. "Besides, it isn't always like that. Things have just been stressful lately."
Laura succeeded in freeing her hand and drummed her fingers against the bar, her jaw still clenched tightly. "It doesn't make it right," she bit out once more.
Logan rubbed his hand over his face again, and then moved to pick up the bottle for another drink. It was empty, although he didn't remember finishing it. He turned on the stool, one hand reaching out to rest on her shoulder. To his dismay, she pulled away from him before he could touch her, a scowling look of disgust marring her features. He dropped his hand, his own expression tightening in anger as she argued, "You're letting her change you, Logan. And it's not like it's a change for the better."
He gestured toward the house in frustration, "And you think that Gambit hasn't changed you?"
She shook her head angrily, "There's nothing romantic between us-"
He let out a bark of laughter, "You think it has anything to do with romance? Or with sex? It doesn't have anything to do with that. Being around people, caring for them, it changes everyone involved, Laura."
"But Remy has only changed me for the better," she argued, crossing her arms under her breasts.
Logan laughed again and pushed himself to his feet, "Yeah, so being his nursemaid is 'for the better'?" he remarked derisively.
"I'm not his nursemaid!"
"You sure have acted like it. You dropped everything, left everything, to go chase after him when he lost his leg. You've barely left his side, doing everything he asks you to…" he trailed off, taking a few steps away and turning away to show her his back. What the hell did he care what she did with Remy? Why was he even going there? With a sigh, he turned back around to face her furiously cold expression. She could do that, be burning with anger and turn into the perfect vengeful ice queen. "Whatever. I know you're happy with him, so that's beside the point." He paused, "Or rather that is the point. Are you happy, Laura?"
Her cool façade cracked just a bit as his tone changed. Uncrossing her arms, she rubbed damp palms against her terry-cloth-covered thighs. She met his gaze as she said, "Of course, I am. We're partners, and I can't imagine him not being here." Despite her best efforts, he could hear the strain in her voice at that last part, reminding them both that Remy was only human and was susceptible to old age.
He moved back over to lean against the bar beside her, maintaining eye contact. "Then that's the point. No matter what pain you'll go through, you won't regret any of this." He paused to let that sink in, to wait for her nod of agreement. "You have to accept that it's the same for me. I can't imagine life without Jubilee, and any pain that comes with being with her?" He shook his head, his lips quirking into a smile as he said with feeling, "It's fucking worth it."
Laura held his gaze as the silence lengthened. Finally, she sighed and looked away. He lightly rested his hand on hers on top of the bar, giving her the opportunity to pull away. Instead, she turned her hand so that her fingers laced with his. Giving her hand a gentle squeeze he said, "You don't have to understand it or even like it. All you have to do is accept that it's happening, and that it's making me a very happy man."
He watched the profile of her face as she took another deep breath and slowly released it. Finally, she turned back to face him. Her expression was clear, and he could see that she still wasn't happy with the situation, but that she was resigned to it. She gave him a tight smile and squeezed his hand back before slipping her fingers free as she stood. "Well, as long as it continues to do so, I won't have to say 'I told you so.' In any case, I think I'm going to need a couple more beers to get to the 'acceptance' part. You in?"
He smiled, deciding that this was enough. He watched as she circled the bar to pull open the cooler beneath it. "Any time, kid. Grab a couple while you're back there."
*See "The Collector"
Author's Note: Sorry the last chapter was so short. Of course, as a result, this one was pretty long. I decided to cut here because of length and also because I think Remy and Jubilee's discussion deserves its own chapter.
As always, keep the feedback coming. I'm going to try to get back to posting a new chapter each week, so you can look for another one mid-week next week.