I tossed and turned. I couldn't get away.
"Please don't go!" I yelled.
"Keep your hands away you whore, I don't want you anymore? Can't you see that?" He shouted.
"Please don't go. I'll do it! I'll have sex with you but don't go." I begged.
"I don't want your virginity anymore! I just want to get away from you." He said and chuckled.
"I thought you were special, unique. But you're like every other whore." He said and I cried even more.
"Don't leave... Don't leave me." I whispered as he walked away.
"Come back... Jonathon."
"Clary! Clary wake up! Wake up! It's a dream!" I heard two girls shouting at me. I opened my eyes to see a worried Isabelle and a scared Quinn.
I was drenched in sweat and I felt tears streaming down my face.
"What's wrong? We heard screaming!" Said Max and Sebastian as they ran in.
"I had a nightmare..." I said and they looked at me sadly.
"Is it... Is it the same?" Said Sebastian and I nodded.
"Can we take Clary for a second?" Asked Max and the girls nodded. The guys rushed me into their room where Magnus and Jace were sitting.
"It's back?" Asked Magnus.
"I think he's coming back Magnus. I know it's stupid but I always have the nightmares when he comes back. I can feel it." I said, slightly panting.
I can't believe this. All the guys were literally my brothers, I love them. But my actual brother doesn't even know who Jonathon is and what he did.
"Guys can I talk to her alone?" Asked Jace and the guys left, shutting the door behind them.
"Forget him." He said.
"I can't! Can't you understand that?! I can't forget my first love!" I exclaimed and he stood up.
"Please Clary, don't love him." He said.
"I can't help myself Jace. I just can't..." I said, crying.
"Clary..." He said and I cried into his chest.
"Jace, I hate you." I said
"I hate you too." He said and I smiled.
"I really do hate you." I said and he chuckled.
"Do you hate me more than him?" He asked and my head dropped.
"No. I can't hate anyone more than him." I said and he looked hurt.
"You should probably tell the girls why you were having a nightmare." He said before walking out of the room.
I quietly sobbed. All I needed was Jace to hold me and tell me it's going to be okay.
I walked to my room and started telling the girls.
"Jonathon was a friend of mine. Well, a boyfriend, a first love." I sighed.
"We were inseparable. No one understood us like we did, we had our own inside jokes, own language, own looks, own smiles and own features. We knew what each look on each others faces meant. And I knew what the look that he always had meant. Sex. Just desire and lust to tear innocence apart and unleash sinful lust." I said.
"He would respect my decision about staying a virgin... But after a while, he got impatient." I said.
Flashback
"Babe, when are you going to be ready?!" He said harshly.
"I... I'm just a little nervous okay? I'll be ready really soon." I said.
"NO! You said that two months ago Clary. When will you actually suck it up and get it over with?" He said.
"Jonathon... I'm just not ready. I'm scared and uncertain." I said.
"Well fuck that! We're having sex." He said and pushed me to the bed.
"No!" I shrieked.
"Shut up you idiot! Your brother's idiotic friends are downstairs!" He said, slapping me.
"Jonathon this isn't like you." I said and he chuckled.
"This is me." He said and started to tear off clothing.
"Jonathon! Stop! Please! Stop it!" I shouted and kicked.
"Stop! Please stop!" I shrieked again, this time, tears flowing down my face.
End Flashback
"He... raped you?" Asked Quinn, shocked.
"No, the boys bust the door open and tore him off me. I remember being so helpless as Magnus and Max covered me up in sheets and picked me up to take me away. I remember looking back and seeing Jace on top of Jonathon, punching his face and screaming at him and Sebastian trying to get him off. I had never seen Jace so angry." I said, remembering the scene.
"So... They saved you?" Asked Izzy.
"Yeah. After that, I made them promise not to tell Alec. Alec doesn't know anything." I said.
"You have to tell him." Said Izzy.
"No." I declined.
"He'll stop saying those stupid things to you. He'll notice the shit brother he's been." Said Izzy.
"Alec will think what he wants to think." I said and we decided to just forget about it. I looked outside and there was a sun rise.
"I'm going to get some air." I said and ran out. I walked out to the beach to feel the soft sand under my feet.
"You forgot a jacket." Said a voice behind me. I looked back and saw Sebastian holding up a jumper.
"Thank you." I said and gave him a kind smile.
"Is everything okay now?" He asked and I nodded.
"You know... I think you and Alec should talk. He's going through rough stuff now, and it's really hard for him to talk to anyone. Specially guys, you know how he likes to keep the macho leader role. You're his sister, you're family." He said and I sighed.
"I know... But, he might not want to talk to me... You know him." I said and he chuckled.
"He will talk, trust me. Just start off by saying that you know he's going through a rough time." He said and I nodded.
After watching the sun rise, we both went inside and proceeded to make pancakes, eggs, bacon and coffee.
"Wakey wakey! Breakfast is ready!" I called out and a whole row of grumpy people came walking down the stairs.
"I should've never come." Said Dwayne and I laughed.
After everyone came down and picked their breakfast, we all sat on the table and even though it was a bit crammed, we all enjoyed it.
"So, let's go to the beach after this?" I asked.
"That's a pretty good idea." Said Magnus. We all washed our own plates and then went upstairs to change. I changed into my strapless red bikini and put on some jean short suspenders. I got my bag which had some money, speakers, cigarettes,a towel and my phone in it and started heading out the door.
"I'll head over there." I announced to the others.
"Awesome, Alec's already there I think." Said Max and I walked over to our little section of the beach. We always hang out there because it's perfect. Alec and I found it when we were little kids, it's secluded from the rest of the beach since some rocks surround it.
The sand is softer there, it's silky and white, and there's a big cliff. Under the cliff there's a cave and we always do campfire's in there since it's private and the light stays in the cave.
I went through a little safe path between the rocks and saw Alec sitting on a big round rock, looking at the ocean. I left my bag on the sand and climbed up the rock to join him.
"It's beautiful isn't it?" I asked and he nodded.
"Listen Alec... I know that you're going through a rough time and I know you need to talk it out with someone. You want to keep your macho reputation between the guys but that doesn't mean that you have to be a total macho with me. I'm your little sister, you can talk to me." I said and he sighed.
"Clary, I have some news." Said Alec, his voice trembling as if it was going to break.
I moved closer to him and put an arm around his shoulders.
"You can tell me anything." I whispered to him, laying my head on his shoulder.
"You know why Erin broke up with me?" He asked and I shook my head.
"She got mad after finding out that... She wasn't exactly my type." He said.
"What do you mean?" I asked.
"Clary... I'm gay." He whispered, I could feel his pain and disappointment in his voice.
"So?" I asked.
"You're not... Disappointed?" He asked.
"Alec, you're my brother. My big brother. You're always going to be my hero, I love you. You're my family and your sexuality won't change that. You're sexuality isn't something to be disappointed about." I said and he held my hand tightly.
"I'm sorry for not telling you." He said and we both hugged.
"I have something to tell you too." I said and he looked at me, waiting for the devastating story I was about to tell him.
"Well, you see..." I started. I could see Alec's fury grow bit by bit as I told him the story with Jonathon. He was infuriated with him and so sad about what I had to go through without telling anyone
"It's okay Alec." I said and he hugged me.
"And..." He said.
"And?" I asked.
"And... I'm dating Magnus..." He said and I smiled.
"Really?!" I exclaimed, it was impossible to contain my happiness.
"Yeah." He said, smiling goofily. I smiled and hugged him.
"That's so awesome!" I said and he laughed.
"Guys!" We heard people shouting at us. We saw everyone walking over to us and waving. I smiled before giving Alec a big hug.
"I love you big bro." I said.
"I love you too baby sis." He said
Soooooo Alec finally comes out to Clary! I'm proud :') I actually used a memory from a friend coming out to me and used the same context for Alec and Clary. I was really proud of him so I kinda let out my feelings through Clary. I hope you guys liked it! Anddddddd I'll try to update soon! I'm going to update Teach Me in a couple of minutes so stay tuned!