Chapter 7: Behind my smile is everything you'll never understand.

I looked out the window getting the sense something bad was going to happen. The person I saw made my blood run cold, my heart raced but then skip a beat.

I jumped out the bed and raced down the stairs, I heard Sides call my name, but I didn't care. I jumped stair after stair about the fifth stair I jumped to the bottom.

I swung the door open an angry scowl on my face, I glared at the smiling girl.

"Hi Lexi." she chirped happily I growled menacingly.

I grabbed her arm and dragged her to the kitchen, angrily ranting to her cause she had no right to be here.

"What," she whined, "You didn't miss your little sister." she pouted, I sighed in defeat.

The anger in my eye melted away, and it was filled with joy and happiness, and fear.

"Yes Kim I missed you a lot, but you know it isn't safe to be here." I scowled with little to no anger.

"I know I just missed you…. a lot." she wrapped her hands around me I sighed. Truth be told I missed her to, I missed her lots and lots I never want her to go away again.

"I love you." she murmured.

"I love you more." I told her, she beamed with joy.

"Going to let me introduce me to all your friends." I frowned what frien….oh no Sides.

I walked out the kitchen my sister's hand in mine she had a wide grin on her face.

"Lex who is she?" I knew Sides was going to have lots of questions, and to be honest I feared it.

Not the questions but going back to the past, when it didn't need to be brought up not now. I moved to sit in his lap.

"She's my sister." I told him with a bright smile, he frowned deeply.

My smile faltered, his frown deepened his optics were questioning, I silently plead for him not to voice his confusion.

"I'm Kimberly nice to meet you." she said politely with a warm and happy smile.

"Kim for short." I told them.

"I didn't know you had a sister, never seen her before." me and Kimberly winched.

"Uh yeah well that's because she doesn't live here." I told him which was the truth.

"Do you live with your mom?" it was such an innocent but it had so much darkness and pain behind it.

"No." she said shortly.

"Our mom is dead." I told them shortly, no need for details and Sideswipe knew by the way I didn't look at anyone, that it was something that shouldn't be brought up yet.

"Kimi and Lexi interesting." I rolled my eyes at Sideswipe.

"Actually it's Lexi and Kimi because I do believe I am older." I smirked, at Kim she pouted.

"So youngest rule get away with everything." she stuck her tongue out, I snorted.

"Real mature."

"Who said I was mature." I sighed heavily, as she pouted more before she glanced at Blue.

"That is my sister Kim always has to be the last to say something." I muttered the room laughed.

"I do not!" I raised an eyebrow at her, she thought about it for a minute, she just the last word.

"Shut up." she grumbled.

"Keep pouting like that your face is going to get stuck like that." Mikaela told her with a grin.

Kim huffed, "So, then Lexi would have to do whatever I want."

"I already do whatever you want." I got in a more comfortable position in Side's lap.

"You'll do whatever Sides want to." Sam commented, causing me to glare intensely at him.

"You shut up."

'I'm just saying, more like using my previous knowledge."

"Knowledge I thought you only understood stupid." Sideswipe told Sam, he glared sharply at Sides.

I could help but notice the way Blue stayed quiet during most of the conversation. All he did was stare at Kimberly, with a smile on his face something was definitely going to happen there. Since Kim was eyeing him back, and I'm okay with that.

After so long the bots had to leave and Sam's mom needed him home so it was only me, Sides, and Kimberly. Kim was downstairs watch who knows what on tv, while me and Sides sat on my bed.

He ran his fingers through my hair, I leaned on his chest trying to relax knowing his questions were coming. He turned me around so I was facing him he pressed a light kiss to my forehead. He moved his lips down to my nose lastly my lips.

It was a long gentle kiss, but the love, adoration, and passion was still there and still strong.

"Love?" he asked after releasing me from the searing kiss, I sighed.

"Yes?" I asked leaning my forehead onto his.

"Do you trust me?" he asked tentatively I blinked, not what I was expecting but ok.

"Well, Sides it's hard for me to trust people I haven't trusted anyone in a long time, so yes I…. think I…..trust you." the words were raw in my mouth, making me think over what I said.

"Okay, then tell me." I looked up.

"Tell you what?" I asked.

"The truth the whole truth, I saw how you smiled it wasn't real your hiding something, I want to know please." I slowly got out his lap, and embraced myself.

"I was four, at the time and Kim was only three the only places in the house we went were the kitchen bathroom, and our room. Our room was the safest place, the place we both isolated ourselves on." I told him.

I laid down on the bed and faced the wall

"Our father came home drunk. He was going for my sister she was only two at the time. I ran to him, I told him to leave her alone he throw me into the oven. The glass shattered around me... Kim ran to me while my mom held off my father. I ..i...i saw my mother get up." Tears streamed down my face Sides tried to comfort me but it wasn't working.

"This time instead of fighting she ran, but instead of getting her babies she left us in the glass. Rejection hit me so hard it turned to anger. I went outside I watched my mom run, I called out to her she turned around, and my father shot her she fell to the ground. I screamed for her, my sister was in the window screaming and banging on the glass for our mom to get up. Then she ran to go hide."

"My dad was angry for what just happened he blames me for her death so do I so I always understand way he hated me. I ran to my room to see my sister curled up in a ball on my bed. I went to her side to comfort her. I told her to run away, and never come back I told her I would find her when he was gone…..Sh... she got on a train that night and never came back. That's why I got Autophobia." I was crying my eyes out Sides was giving me reassuring reasons on why he wouldn't leave me.

I cried and I cried, because never before was I able to let the pain out a smile can only be held for so long. I didn't like telling people my story that's why I don't because behind the smile and lies is something people will never understand.

There is your update everybody

R&R

DarkShadow out