Javier followed Kevin down the street as he looked around at the passing natives with fascination. He stopped at every shop window to stare at the different items that were being sold.
They were stopped outside a jewelers and a shop clerk came out when she noticed Kevin's staring. She spread her arms wide with a warm smile, "E komo mai."
Kevin turned to Javier for translation and Javier was so lost in thought he had to ask the women to repeat what she said. He blushed, but was at least thankful that Kevin didn't notice. "She says to come in, but we're gonna have to hurry up right now before the restaurant I want to take you to closes." He smiled apologetically at the woman and thanked her anyway.
She nodded in understanding and said in Hawaiian with a wink, "Be sure to come back to buy something special for your boyfriend."
Javier's blush deepened and he was glad that Kevin couldn't understand their language and nodded before she walked back into her small shop. Once she disappeared, Kevin turned to Javier with a smirk, "What'd she say?"
Javier smiled effortlessly, putting his acting skills to work, "Oh nothing, she just thinks I'm cute. Girls just can't help themselves when they see me. Sometimes I bring boys in, too." He nudged Kevin's arm lightly.
Now it was Kevin's turn to blush, "Did she happen to mention how modest you are?"
Javier smiled and began to tug him away from the window not ignoring the longing look Kevin gave. "C'mon, dinner's waiting."
Kevin finally looked away from the Hawaiian jewelry in the window and allowed Javier to drag him down the street. Only seconds into the walk Kevin asked curiously, "What did those sayings mean on the bracelets?"
Javier was confused at first, forgetting the jewelry that Kevin was infatuated with, but quickly remembered how closely Kevin was staring at them and figured the Irishman was trying to decipher the Hawaiian language inscribed on the wood. "Sappy love stuff, same kind of thing you'd see in Ireland."
Kevin nodded, but didn't say that he had guessed that much, but wanted to know exactly what the words had meant.
As they walked along the street, Kevin would feel his hand brush against Javier's and sometimes the other boy would press their shoulders together but sometimes he would pull away completely. Kevin tried to brush it off, maybe he didn't realize that he was doing it or maybe he was trying not to get too close to him as he would be leaving in a week. But Kevin had never felt a spark like this so strong; he didn't want to just let it go.
He sighed and Javier must have noticed the deflation of his mood because only a second later he felt a strong, yet comforting hand enclose around his. He lifted his head up to share a small smile with Javier and neither let go until they reached the restaurant.
Halfway through dinner, a conversation was ignited. The silence prior was not uncomfortable at all; they were both more than happy to eat and enjoy each other's company.
"So, you live in Ireland, but can speak practically fluent English. You study it a lot in school?" Javier asked after he took a sip of his drink.
Kevin shrugged his shoulders shyly, "More on my own, my father thinks it's important to speak multiple languages if you're going to be in contact with foreign countries and while I wholly agree, I'd much rather learn a language because I want to, you know?"
Javier laughed, "I have never met someone who voluntarily learned a language and didn't stop in frustration at least once and think why the hell are they doing it in the first place."
Kevin grinned, "Yeah, well, there were some frustrated fits, but I kept going and here I am. Of course, I told my Da it was all for the diplomacy; he'd kill me if he thought I was wasting my time again."
Javier looked at him curiously, "Don't like your old man?"
Kevin shook his head immediately, "I love him. He can be a little harsh sometimes, but he's my father, I still love him." Sure, he could be cold at most times, but he never intentionally hurt him; he was just doing his job and raising his son.
"Just because he's your father, doesn't mean you have to love him. Trust me, I know." Javier replied looking down at his plate as he pushed a piece of his food around.
Kevin chewed his food and swallowed using the extra time to decide whether to ask or not and once he swallowed he did, "Care to elaborate."
Javier looked up and locked eyes with the clear blue staring in concern across from him, "Deadbeat piece of shit father. Me and Mama left his sorry ass years ago."
Kevin's eyes immediately softened, "I'm sorry, Javier."
Javier ignored the tumble of his stomach when he heard Kevin say his name and smiled, "It's alright, didn't need him anyway. My momma's more than enough." He paused for a moment and then asked, "You have more family?"
Kevin nodded, "Ma is back home with my little sisters, Karen and Stacy. They're a few years younger than me, still in high school so they're not old enough for world traveling yet."
"Is your Dad trying to get them into this life too?" Javier asked hoping it didnt sound rude when he said "this life". But, Kevin didn't seem to mind at all as he shrugged his shoulders.
"Nah, Stacy is studying for culinary school and Karen wants to teach." He smiled like the proud older brother he was. They were really the best sisters he could ever ask for, especially when he realized they knew that he liked the boys the way he was supposed to like girls and made of big deal telling him that he was still the same big brother and promised to keep it a secret. He wasn't afraid that he Dad would kick him out of the house, but he didn't want to take the chance of him finding out and the disappointment and shame he'd most likely bring to his father.
"Penny for your thoughts, sir?" Javier's voice broke Kevin from his thoughts. When Kevin turned his attention back to Javier, he couldn't help smile and him. He'd never felt like this before, but he knew exactly what it was. And as every part of his brain was desperately trying to send warning signals, "Mistake! Mistake!", his heart was stronger and drowned the other cries with it's longing to hold Javier close in his arms like it was as natural as breathing.
But did he want the same?
Kevin bite his lip, "Javier, do you mind if I ask you a question?"
Javier held back the, 'You just did.' retort when he heard how serious he sounded, "Sure,"
"Are you…" Kevin blushed, not knowing how to ask this without sounding like a fool, "Do you feel, no," He shook his head, "Um, you know, like-" He looked across the table hoping that Javier could sense where he was trying to go with this.
Javier smiled, "You're cute when you're all flustered." He nudged Kevin's foot with his and felt Kevin return the favor after a second of hesitation. "It's okay, Kevin, really." He tried to soothe him.
Kevin decided that explaining would probably be easier than asking, "I know I'll only be here for a week or so, but already I feel like I finally know what I want...but I need to know if you want the same...or if you're even interested…" He began to ramble as he got nervous, "I don't know if this is just flirting or possibly something more." He swallowed thickly after he finished waiting for Javier to say anything.
"Well then, if we've only got a week we better start soon, huh?" Javier said as easy as melted butter spreads across bread.
Kevin lifted his head as his spirits rose, "Seriously?"
"I'm as serious as you are Irish." Javier responded coolly with a wink.
Kevin smiled feeling the butterflies flap their wings repeatedly against the inside of his stomach. Finally for once he didn't feel as if he was just going through life along his dad's wake; he was doing something for himself that he wanted. Not his father. Him. The way a 22 year old was supposed to live his life, and for a week Kevin was going to ignore his mind for once follow his heart.
"So, tomorrow do you wanna hang out? Maybe explore some more?" Kevin smiled and finallly had the courage to look him in the eye as he asked him out.
Kevin could laugh; here was Kevin Ryan, the Irish Diplomat's Son asking another man, Javier Esposito out on a date. And he wouldn't have it any other way.
"I'll meet you here tomorrow morning at 10 or I can pick you up from your hotel so you don't get lost." He smiled teasingly.
"The latter, if you don't mind." Kevin laughed.
Javier shrugged his shoulders, "Of course not, I'll walk you there soon after I pay for this so I know where to go and tomorrow will be another new day of adventures."
Kevin smiled and hoped he didn't look as excited as he felt, again, he did not want to look like a fool.
Even thought this would be all over in a week, for now Kevin let it all fade away and be happy for once.
"I'll be fine, Kate, what am I? An ameture?" Javier scoffed into his beer as he talked to Kate on the phone that night after he dropped Kevin off at his hotel.
"You're a functioning human male, Esposito, I know what happens when you find a cute guy. Think with your upstairs brain, not the downstairs." She huffed after listening to Javier explain to her his progress and immediately she knew there'd be issues.
"My heart?" Javier faked innocence just to be difficult, but Kate wasn't having it.
"Your dick, Javier."
Javier couldn't bite back the laugh that escaped his throat, "Oh calm down, Katherine, I'll be perfectly okay. What's a job without a little fun along the way?"
"I don't care what you say, Espo, you have feelings for this guy. Hell, even I think he sounds like a good kid. Just don't hurt him. You can get the money by getting close and soaking the band aid, not ripping it off."
Javier rolled his eyes, "Put that on a t-shirt, why don't you."
"Maybe then, you'd listen to me."
"Whatever, Beckett, just trust me, I've got this. He'll be fine, I'll be fine, you'll be fine and we'll all ride off into separate sunsets at the end of the day."
He heard Beckett laugh and he was glad some of the tension was washing away, "There's only one sunset, dumbass."
Javier scoffed and ignored her comment instead saying their goodbyes, "I'll talk to you tomorrow, Kate. Don't lose your beauty sleep worrying about me- you need all the help you can get." He teased.
"Shut up, asshole." She retorted with no heat behind it before hanging up and leaving Javier alone in his house with only the dial tone from the phone separating his ears from a dead silence.
Until he dropped the phone on the hook and fell into his living room chair. There were no more distractions from his mind. No matter how hard he just tried to convince Kate that he felt nothing special towards this man, it was all an act; he didn't believe it one bit.
Lying to yourself is as hard as you'd think.
And as he laid down trying to get to bed, memories of Kevin's smile, eyes, laugh and the moment just before he entered his hotel and dropped a soft and quick kiss to Javier's cheek before disappearing through the door kept him up all night.