A/N Thank you so much for the reviews! This chapter is shorter than most, and my apologies for that. It's finals week but I really wanted to give you all something soon. I promise the next chapter will be longer. Enjoy!
Their walk was pleasantly short. Tauriel would never admit it, but Kili weighed a good deal and by the time they got to their room, her arms were burning. She thanked the other elf and dismissed him. She gently set Kili on the bed, finally relaxing.
She sat down next to him, and tugged his fur jacket off to get to the heavy, blood crusted maile underneath. She hadn't dared to take it off him before, for fear of re-opening his wound. Tauriel pulled it off of him and set both parts down next to the bed. She leaned back over him, brushing the snarled hair out of his face.
She took a comb from a small table and began to gently work it through his hair. She was getting to the end when Kili's eyes opened. Their eyes met and he gave her a sleepy smile. "You didn't need to carry me." He mumbled, his speech slightly slurred from sleep.
"You should rest." She whispered, looking away from him and beginning to work on a particularly nasty snarl.
He reached up and gripped her arm. "Look at me Tauriel, please." His cheeky smile was gone, replaced with a serious frown. "I almost died, and it could happen again at any time."
"No." Tauriel interrupted, feeling a tug at her heart.
"Let me finish." He said quickly, the sleep gone from his voice. "It's not that I'm planning on dying, far from it." He squeezed her arm lightly. "I would like to live, and live my life with you, Tauriel. A long time ago, I told you that you made me feel alive. It's not just a feeling anymore, you're the reason I'm alive."
Tauriel struggled to keep breathing, and keep from crying. She loved Kili, in her heart, she knew that she loved him. He was prepared to die for her and she would do the same in a heartbeat, but he had said it himself. The two were worlds away.
"I love you Tauriel." He whispered, looking at her with is dark brown eyes. She could see, he was pleading with her, begging her to love him too.
It hurt. It hurt more than the death of her parents, it hurt more than falling down a mountain side. She loved him with everything she had, and it hurt. It hurt because it was real.
She wanted him to understand all the reasons why they couldn't be together, why she was holding back. She wanted him to know how much she loved him, and just how scared she was to say it.
The hopeful glint in his eyes slowly faded to a look of defeat. He looked away from her and released her arm. Tauriel could see the embarrassment burning in his cheeks.
It was then that she decided to be brave, to be braver than she had ever been before. The elf leaned in close, pressing her lips against his. She cupped his face in her hand, running her thumb along his rough cheek. She pulled back a little bit, and rested her forehead on his.
"I love you Kili. I love you more than this language can express." Each word was freedom and release. The pain in her heart was still there, a feeling she had not felt in a long time. Fear.
She moved away quickly, rolling onto her back in the bed. She stared at the roof, trying to calm herself down.
"Tauriel," Kili whispered, shifting closer to her. "Are you okay?"
The elf sat in silence. It was then that she decided, she was done letting fear control her life. She had disobeyed Thranduil to save Kili. She had left everything to be with this dwarf, and she would be damned if she let her fear stop her now.
She turned her head to look at Kili, her eyes scanning his pale face. The concern and unguarded love in his eyes eased her remaining concerns and bolstered her confidence.
"Yes," She whispered, reaching out and taking his hand in hers. "I'm free." She pushed herself up on the bed until she was sitting upright. "You need to sleep Kili, the sooner you heal, the better."
Tauriel moved off the bed, walking around the room. She made her way to a small table by the window. There, she removed her empty quiver and her daggers from her belt. She set them down carefully, and slid her feet out of her boots, leaving them tucked under the table.
She stood at the window, looking at green hills, and watching the river disappear into the distance towards the shire. The beauty of this world never ceased to amaze her. Far off in the distance, the first rays of sun were just beginning to come up over the horizon.
A deep painful cough from the bed snapped her out of her thoughts. She rushed to Kili's side as his body shook. He took a great wheezing breath and continued to cough. When he finally stopped coughing, he was breathing hard and shaking.
Tauriel slid into the bed next to him. She slid an arm under his back and pulled him close so that his head rested against her shoulder. The elf rested her slim hand on his large one, running rubbing calming circles on it with her thumb.
She held him close as he nodded off to sleep. She stayed there until he woke, guarding him as she had done so many times before.