He slept in my bed after, leaving me tense the entire night. He didn't move much, but when he did, I would cringe and scooch myself further from him. The next morning, I woke to an empty bed and I sighed in relief. I knew Damon had a job to go to somewhere, but it seemed he did not leave the house often enough to maintain whatever it was he did.
That's when I noticed it. It was a black object in the corner of the room. I hadn't really noticed its presence until now. But then again, did it matter? It was silly to create another problem for myself. I rolled my eyes and laid back down onto the mattress.
After an additional twenty minutes, I got up, deciding I could no longer hide in my room. I quickly slipped on another dress before braiding my hair. The kitchen was empty, but a plate of french toast sat on the counter as if calling my name. I grabbed the plate, not even thinking twice. I ate hungrily, not having to use my manners with the kitchen so deserted. That's when he walked in, his expression piercing enough to kill.
"What the hell are you eating, Elena?" He yelled, his eyes growing wide.
"The f-french toast Rebekah made," I stuttered, my mind already spinning.
"That was mine, you little heathen. Did you not see the note she left?" He was now walking toward me with his fist clenched. I have to admit, I did not see the note so delicately placed on the refrigerator door, so small, I couldn't even read what it said from where I was standing.
He finally approached me, grabbing the collar of my dress in a tight grasp, my face full of fear and panic.
"You did it on purpose, I know you did," He muttered with his teeth clenched. I felt his grip tighten, cutting off my air supply.
"N-no. I d-didn't see the note, I swear." I was now panicking as he stepped closer until I was pinned up against the counter.
"You know something, Elena, I have never met anyone so prone to screwing up. Have I not taken enough from you yet to prove that obedience is bliss?" He muttered beneath his breath before he finally loosened his grip enough for me to breathe.
"You have no more you can take from me. You have no more to steal," I spat, my face turning to rage rather than fear.
"Next, I will take your dignity, your pride, and beat you so hard, not even God will stop me. Even He is tired of you." His grip tightened again and my hips finally began to ache from his body grinding them into the counter.
I didn't respond to his comment, even though I knew he was lying. If there was one thing I had left, it was faith, but I would not tell him that.
"Now apologize," He demanded.
He stared deeply into my eyes before shaking my collar roughly, telling me to respond.
"I-I'm sorry," I whispered before I felt him throw me to the floor of the kitchen roughly.
He gave me one last piercing glare before leaving me there and walking out of the kitchen. I surprisingly did not cry, not a single tear. Was I truly fearless? Was I finally getting used to the torment? It didn't seem to matter anymore.
Around lunch time, the house was vacant except for Caroline and me. Rebekah was visiting her parents with her kids, while Damon was at his workplace finally. Caroline was nowhere in sight, but that didn't stop me from my chores. I was changing the sheets on my bed, humming a song quietly. Before long, I walked down the hall with the sheets in a basket on my hip. That's when I heard it, a small whimper coming from the bathroom. I knocked on the door lightly.
"Caroline? Are you okay in there?" I asked her in a calm voice.
"Elena? Is that you?" She asked, her sobs persisting.
I decided to go in, nearly dropping the basket when I saw her body.
Caroline was on the floor, her white nightgown stained with blood, the red substance everywhere I looked. The blood was smeared on everything, including the rug and toilet seat. I felt my face grow taut when I saw her back leaning against the bathtub, her legs wide open as she cried.
"Everything is going to be fine, Caroline. Just relax," I told her immediately, while dropping to my knees in front of her.
I pushed her nightgown up until I could see between her legs. I cringed at the sight of the blood cascading from her.
"I-I'm losing the baby again. This must be the t-third one this y-year. I've done everything to be a good wife, but I can't even carry his b-baby," She whimpered, "I didn't even tell Damon about any of them."
She continued to sob and the blood gushed in a puddle around her.
"Damon, doesn't know?" I asked in surprise and I felt myself begin to panic. "I'm here now Caroline. Everything will be okay," I told her, my dress now drenched in her blood.
That's when I saw it. It was so small, only about the size of my hand. I took it into my palms, Caroline screaming hysterically as more blood seeped onto the tile flooring.
Everything seemed to stop around me, as if everything was in slow motion. As I held him, I swear I saw that baby look right at me, it's eyes searching. Moments later, however, the baby lay lifeless in my hands, the tears streaming down my own cheeks. I quickly grabbed a hand towel, wrapping the baby in it gently to hide it from Caroline's view.
"Is he breathing?" She begged.
I hesitantly shook my head, her hands pulling at her hair and moments later her breaths became rapid.
"Lord, don't take me baby. Not my baby," She screamed, the placenta finally exiting her frail body. The bathroom was now drenched in blood, Caroline too emotional to notice.
"Caroline, let's get you cleaned up," I said softly, trying to hide my emotions from her. What was I supposed to do with her? How could I tell her it was okay when it wasn't?
I reached over to turn the tub's faucet on, watching as the clear, warm water pounded into the porcelain structure. I had to get her cleaned up before Damon came home. I began to scramble, my shoes stepping in puddles of red.
"What about the rug? Damon will know if he sees the rug," She squeaked weakly, reaching her hand out to point at it and clenching her stomach with the other.
I hugged her gently, Caroline returning the favor.
"I will take care of it. I will make sure he doesn't know. If he does, I will take full responsibility. Just breathe deeply for me, Caroline," I told her, grabbing her arm to help her up.
I gently assisted her into the bathtub, before pulling the bloody nightgown over her head.
"My baby! He took my baby!" She cried loudly while I gathered some clean towels for when she finished her bath. She put her hand over her mouth to stop herself from screaming. Her sobs were heart-breaking.
"Shhhhhhhh," I hushed, trying to soothe the frantic woman.
Next, I grabbed the towel containing the small baby, taking it from the room. I had to wipe the blood off of both of my shoes before I could go any further. I stepped downstairs until I reached the backyard, where the flowers and butterflies seemed to flourish. I quickly dug a hole with my hands, making sure that it was in a garden under the shade for the little angel to enjoy. I kissed the towel I had wrapped the baby in, and it felt cold against my lips. That's when I broke down.
I sobbed, looking up at the sky for something I began to believe wasn't even there. I needed answers. I couldn't understand His choices, his chosen destinies. I gently placed the towel and unborn baby into the small hole, my tears plummeting into the well.
The emotion was just too great to bear. I finished by filling the grave and surrounding the area with flowers. I still could not grasp the reality of the situation. I had watched life being given and then taken away all in the same day. I had seen how easy it was to lose everything before your eyes.
I rushed to return to the bathroom with some bleach and as many mops and rags as I could find. Caroline quietly sobbed beside me in the tub, while I wiped the rest of the bathroom until there was no more red to be seen. The only thing I couldn't clean was the rug. I knew I would have to wash that by hand somehow, but not now.
I collected anything I could throw in the wash: My dress, her nightgown, the bloody rags, and the towels. Then, I changed into a nice, clean dress before scrubbing my shoes and washing my hands and knees, where the blood had soaked through the fabric. Caroline begged to leave the bathroom, and so I helped her get out of the tub, drying her body for her.
I slipped a new nightgown on her and then led her back to her room. As soon as I tucked her under the covers, her eyelids fell shut and she slept. I ran back to the bathroom, knowing there was still evidence left there.
I quickly threw the rug into the bathtub, soaking it a film of bleach and scrubbing. The water ran red before descending down the drain, reminding me of how traumatic the whole experience had been. I could hear someone coming down the hall at a rapid pace. I heard the bathroom door open as I continued to scrub the rug.
"What are you doing, Elena?" Damon asked from the doorway, causing me to drop the rug from the initial surprise.
"I scraped my knee in the garden. I was really bleeding hard," I lied, trying to keep my face serious. By now, the rug was barely red, making my story appear viable.
"I can see that. Make sure that rug is spotless. I would hate to have to stand in your swilt," He hissed staring me up and down.
I just prayed I had removed all traces of blood. He was suspicious. Why was I in the upstairs bathroom?
"Yes, Damon," I whispered quietly and I went back to scrubbing diligently.
"That's what I like to hear, Elena. I will see you at dinner," He growled before shutting the door behind him.
I let out a relieved sigh, gasping for air. I was exhausted.
I made sure to check on Caroline, her body still limp in a peaceful sleep. I told Damon she was not feeling well, but his response made him sound like he didn't care. Rebekah returned late, preparing dinner immediately, while Damon sat on the couch reading a book.
Dinner was enjoyed in complete silence, as if everyone knew about the baby Caroline had lost today, quietly mourning for the loss. I was the only one at the table that knew the truth. How Caroline felt like a failure as a woman and a wife. How she tried so hard to carry the baby to term. How her cries did not stop the blood from seeping from her body.
They would never know. Caroline was the prime example of the perfect wife, but her inability to have children left her with a sense of embarrassment. If there was one thing I gained from everything, it was a new friendship. Caroline and I bonded over loss, but what we gained was far more than I expected.
When I returned to my room around eight, Damon was sitting on my bed. His clothes were in a pile on the floor and my eyes looked up to see that he was naked. I was already tired and traumatized by witnessing Caroline's miscarriage, but the day seemed far from over when he signaled for me to come.
He did not even speak as I stood in front of him at the edge of the bed. His feet touched the floor as he sat, reaching his hands out for me. He unbuttoned my dress, my mind too tired to fight him. My eyelids were struggling to remain open.
The dress slipped off of me, leaving me naked before him. He wrapped his arms around my back and pulled me closer until his face was right between my breasts. He reached for my one of them, kneading it with his hand and causing me to cringe out of disgust. He began to kiss my stomach with his lips, his head even with my ribs. He made a trail with his mouth, but I remained unaffected by his actions.
"You have a beautiful body, Elena," He whispered seductively and he turned his face up to look at me. Without even thinking, I spat in his face, his comment making my stomach turn. The saliva landed right on his eyelid and I pulled myself away.
"You little bitch," He howled and he slapped me hard across the face.
Before I could think, he grabbed my hair roughly and threw me onto the bed.
"You may steal my body, but you will never steal my dignity or my heart," I yelled loudly and my eyes watched in horror when he grabbed the belt lying beside his clothing.
"I will beat you until you beg me to rape you," He hissed.
He stood me up, pushing my head down until it hit the bed with a thud. He cracked his belt as a threat, causing me to flinch.
"Any last words, Elena? An apology, maybe?" He beckoned, my legs trembling while he held my head roughly to the bed.
"Go to hell," I screamed as the belt hit my backside. My legs buckled from the force, but he held me up until I stood firmly again.
He whipped the belt again on my backside, my screams muffled by the echo of the belt. He pushed his hand between my trembling legs, sliding them apart. Moments later, he whipped the belt, landing right between my legs and causing me to shriek. My body fell to the floor, the pain so intense. I lay shaking on the wood flooring as the area between my legs continued to throb.
He grabbed my arm, using it to flip me onto my stomach before whipping me numerous times, some on my back, others on my butt. I was screaming, the pain filling my entire body. I could hear his deep grunts every time the leather met my flesh.
He rolled me over, instantly grabbing my breast in his hand, squeezing it hard before devouring the nipple into his mouth. I was slapping him away, but he wouldn't capitulate. The adrenaline must have been really pumping through his veins as he ripped my legs open, plunging himself into me, my resistance too weak to triumph. I was crying now, but I would not let him win.
"No," I screamed, but his body left me pinned beneath him.
"When are you going to give up, Elena? I will do this to you every night if I have to. It will never change the fact that I have all the control," He whispered into my ear while he continued to thrust into me.
"You will never win," I sobbed, trying to hold back the tears.
"Will you give up if...if I told you I will report you to the Prophet? He will ….give me some rope and a knife ...and tell me to do what I have to," He continued to mutter between his moans.
I just sobbed at the realization that that could happen. He could report my disobedience. They could send a group of men to help teach me to be submissive. They would drag me into the woods and beat me until I was gasping for my last breath, laughing at me as I begged for mercy.
"If I do what you say, will you stop?" I asked finally allowing the tears to leak.
"It will be an improvement from this," He growled, finally finishing his thrusts.
"Say it, Elena," He whispered into my ear..
"You own me, Damon," I whispered quietly before I felt his lips kiss my hair in approval.