Letters to Dave

by hemlockforensics

A campstuck AU where John writes letters to Dave to let his emotions out, without Dave ever reading it. Pepsicola is the major pairing, but Erisol, Gamnep, and Rosemary will also be pairings (And pairings may change throughout!). My second story, please read and review! Thanks! The first chapter isn't as good as the rest, so keep going!

2. Chapter 2

Hello wonderful readers!

So, in this chapter, I am introducing some dialogue! (There isn't a letter in this chapter!) There are two texting conversations; one between Karkat and Dave, and the other one is between John and Rose. At the end, there's a conversation between John and Karkat, but the description is very minimal. I want this fic to be very dialogue based, and I want readers to be able to use their imagination to picture what the characters look like. Eventually I'll put some flashbacks where there will be full description, but not for right now. Anywho, please enjoy! And review if you want any other pairings or you have any ideas of what you want to happen!

Thank you so much!

Hemlockforensics

carcinoGeneticist began pestering turntechGodhead at 18:34

CG: DID YOU FUCKING WANT SOMETHING SHITHEAD

TG: i dont know

TG: you started pestering me vantass

CG: OH HAHAHAHA

CG: YOU ARE /SOOOO/ FUCKING ORIGINAL

CG: I AM LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY

TG: good im glad

TG: spent a long time thinkin up that one

CG: THAT IS ACTUALLY EXTREMELY SAD

CG: CONSIDERING THAT I HAVE HEARD IT NUMEROUS TIMES BEFORE

CG: SO WHAT DID YOU WANT YOU STUPID EXCUSE FOR AN OBJECT

TG: hey whoa

TG: like i said before buddy

TG: you messaged me

CG: …

CG: FINE.

CG: I WANTED TO KNOW WHY YOU DID NOT COME WITH US

CG: I KEEP ATTEMPTING TO ASK EGBERT

CG: BUT HE'S EVIDENTLY TOO FUCKING BUSY GAWKING LIKE AN IDIOT AT SPIDERBITCH THAN TO GIVE ME A PIECE OF MIND

TG: wait like

TG: hes staring at vriska

CG: OH MY FUCKING GOG

CG: YES OF COURSE HE IS STARING AT VRISKA

CG: WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU TAKE ME FOR

CG: I'M NOT BLIND YOU DICK SUCKING HOBKNOCKER

TG: whoa no need to break out your fancy british tomfoolery

CG: TOMFOOLERY IS A WORD ONLY DIPSHITS USE.

CG: IN FACT I DON'T THINK IT'S A WORD AT ALL.

TG: tom·fool·er·y

[tom-foo-luh-ree] Show IPA

noun, plural tom·fool·er·ies.

1.

foolish or silly behavior; tomfoolishness.

2.

a silly act, matter, or thing.

CG: WAIT

CG: YOU ACTUALLY FUCKING LOOKED THAT UP

TG: if it means proving me right and you wrong

TG: i will go to any extreme

TG: even using the frightening

TG:...

TG: dicktionary

CG: DID YOU JUST FUCKING MAKE A PUN

TG: for ironic purposes yeah

TG: and it was the best fucking pun youll ever have the pleasure of seeing

CG: NO IT WAS AWFUL

CG: I WOULD RATHER GOUGE MY OWN EYES OUT AND HAVE THEM STUCK UP MY OWN ASSHOLE BEFORE EVER SEEING THAT AGAIN.

TG: oooh

TG: kinky

TG: karkinky

CG: WHAT THE FUCK

TG: karkinkles

CG: OH MY FUCKING GOG STOP IT NOW

CG: THAT DOESN'T EVEN MAKE SENSE

TG: karkinkles vantass

TG: the demon dicktionary of fleet street

CG: GOD FUCKING DAMMIT DAVE

CG: I SAID SHUT THE FUCK UP

TG: not what you said last night

CG: FUCK

TG: what

CG: YOU

TG: thanks but no thanks

TG: got some bigger fish to fry

TG: so

CG: WHAT

TG: im still a rockstar

CG: SHUT THE FUCK UP WITH THE SONGS

CG: YOU LOOK GAYER THAN KURT HUMMEL ON THE FOURTH OF JULY

TG: im the one who just made a glee reference

CG: UGH

CG: ANYWAY

CG: WHY THE FUCK AREN'T YOU HERE

CG: I MEAN NOT THAT I WANT YOU TO BE HERE OR ANYTHING

CG: IN FACT I AM GOING TO HAVE THE GREATEST FUCKING TIME OF MY LIFE

CG: BECAUSE FOR ONCE

CG: DAVE FUCKING STRIDER ISN'T THERE TO RUIN IT

CG: AND I CAN DO WHATEVER THE FUCK I WANT

TG: fuck

TG: karkat

TG: my heart is broken

TG: shit call the ambulance

CG: NO ONE GIVES A FUCK ABOUT YOUR HEART

CG: EXCEPT FOR MAYBE EGBERT

CG: BUT HE'S A LITTLE SHIT TOO

TG: n-no

TG: i am actually fucking dying

TG: shit karkat hates me

CG: OH GROW THE FUCK UP

TG: at least i know when i die

TG: that i was always taller than you

TG: so i was

TG: m-more grown up than you are

CG: I AM SERIOUSLY ABOUT TO BLOCK YOUR PESTERCHUM

CG: RIGHT

CG: FUCKING

CG: NOW

TG: just one more thing before i die

CG: YES JOHN PISSED IN ONE OF YOUR JUICE BOXES

TG: what

CG: WHAT

TG: karkat

TG: listen

TG: make sure to

CG: WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT

TG: i need you to

CG: OH MY FUCKING GOG JUST SPIT IT THE FUCK OUT

TG: tell terezi

TG: or rather remind her

TG: that she loves me

CG: YOU ARE THE WORST FUCKING "FRIEND"

CG: EVER AND I HATE YOUR FUCKING GUTS

CG: JUST FOR THAT I AM GOING TO SLEEP IN A BUNK WITH JOHN EGBERT

TG: why the fuck would i care about that

TG: i mean

TG: if youre gay its cool and all

TG: but i dont think john is

CG: FUCK YOU I HATE YOU

TG: love you too karkinkles

carcinoGeneticist blocked turntechGodhead at 19:02

TG: huh

TG: guess he didnt really care why im not there

tentacleTherapist started pestering ectoBiologist at 19:02

EB: oh hey rose!

EB: what's up?

TT: I suppose I have gotten just a bit well, spiritless back here.

EB: oh so you needed some good old spirit lifting?

TT: No, quite the opposite actually.

TT: I needed someone extremely mind numbingly dull to get my mind off of Kanaya.

EB: what?

EB: hey!

EB: i'm not mind numbingly dull!

EB: i think i'm really interesting!

TT: Thank you. You are doing a perfect job, this is exactly what I needed.

EB: roooooose!

TT: Yes?

EB: i'm not boring!

TT: Right, of course.

EB: wait, why do you need to get your mind off kanaya?

TT: Didn't I just ask for you to bore me?

TT: I don't want to think about her right now.

EB: aw, trouble in paradise?

TT: I believe you should stick to ectobiology, Mr. Egbert.

TT: I am afraid that my chumhandle is the one that says "Therapist".

TT: I believe I can manage my own feelings, thank you very much.

EB: well yeah, but if you don't sound it out it sounds like one of those creepy cartoons bro watches!

EB: tentacle the rapist.

TT: Dear lord, Johnathan. I am disappointed. How could you honestly look at something so innocent and translate it to that?

EB: oh um…

EB: i'm sorry!

TT: It is quite alright.

TT: Honestly I was just doing what you would call "poking fun".

EB: sorry i can't ever tell when you're joking or not!

TT: Of course you can't. Because clearly I'm an emotionless robot with no time for fun.

TT: Psssht.

TT: For your information, I am currently reading a very interesting fantasy novel.

EB: rose…

EB: that's not fun.

TT: How dare you? Of course it is fun.

EB: ...

EB: so why are you mad at kanaya?

TT: I am not.

EB: wait, what?

TT: I am not angry with her.

EB: so then…

EB: why do you want to get your mind off of her?

TT: Because she has fallen asleep, I am afraid.

TT: On me.

EB: holy shit that is so cute!

TT: No it is not.

EB: rose.

EB: your totally hot girlfriend just fell asleep on you.

EB: it's really cute.

TT: I am going to pretend like I did not just see you call my partner "hot".

TT: And back to the subject of this being cute.

TT: It is not. It was for a moment, but once she started drooling, the cuteness had replaced itself with fatigue.

EB: you're really that grossed out?

TT: John, I am weary of it. Fatigue does not mean "grossed out". It means I am tired.

EB: then why don't you just fall asleep?

TT: Then I would fall asleep upon Kanaya.

EB: oh.

EB: whelp, karkat's starting to look annoyed, i should probably talk to him!

EB: bye kanaya!

"Karkat?" John looked at his friend, quirking up an eyebrow.

"Is there something you want, shitknuckle?" He glared at him, shoving his phone into his backpack.

"Shitknuckle? That's a new one!" John smiled, "I'm proud of your newly widened use of vocabulary!"

"What the fuck ever." Karkat groaned, turning to face the window.

"Okay," John sighed. "What's wrong, Karkat?"

"Nothing is fucking wrong! Now shut the fuck up before I push you out of this stupid fucking goddamn bus!" Karkat turned to him.

"Okay! Okay, fine!" John lifted his hands up defensively. "Just don't push me out of a bus! That would suck so much!"

"Why the fuck isn't Dave here anyway?" Karkat looked out the window again.

"Oh...that's what this is about?" John smirked. "Look, it's okay Karkat, I miss Dave too!"

"I do NOT fucking miss that stupid fuckwaffle!" Karkat snapped again, "I am just curious. Is that too much to fucking ask for? Or is your brain to pathetically small to be able to process even the smallest shit as that?!"

"Boy, why is everyone insisting on calling me stupid today?" John shook his head, but then smiled back at Karkat. "His Bro made him stay home to look after Dirk!"

"Oh man, that fucking sucks." Karkat shuddered. "I would fucking hate having a younger sibling. I mean, if Kankri is such a little son of a bitch, I can't even imagine. Fuck what would I do if I had to take care of Kankri for a fucking week?!" His eyes widened, causing John to laugh.

"Hey, I think Jane is pretty cool! We get along pretty well!" He said, shrugging his shoulders. "But then again, she's pretty kick ass. I mean, aside from all the goddamn baking…" He shivered.

"Fuck, how did we end up with such weird ass fucking families?" Karkat smirked lightly, turning to face John.

"I have no idea!" He laughed even harder, happy to see Karkat smile.

And that was when the bus arrived at Camp Skaia. John and Karkat looked each other and smiled, knowing that their favorite time of the year had arrived once more.