Part 3: Love's Heavy Burden

"That was the hardest most painful thing I have ever had to do." Bella spoke as she sat down on the sofa in the middle of the living room. "I know why she wants to go, I know we must let her go, she is old enough to choose for herself how to live this life she has been given, but seeing her get on that airplane. I never imagined that it would make me feel like this."

"More painful than becoming a vampire?" Edward said with a slight smile as he rubbed Bella's back knowing that it would comfort her.

"Different kind of pain. I feel as if my whole body is aching, as if my heart is shattering slowly piece by piece." Bella nestled her head onto Edwards shoulder, her legs draping over his.

"I know how you feel. I felt that way when I tried leaving you." Edward murmured as he placed his arm around his wife, pulling her closer to him. "As vampires our emotions are heightened, we feel sorrow and pain, longing and yearning so deep within us that it manifests itself in such a way as you are feeling now. That's why loss can force a vampire to do unimaginable things."

"When will it stop?" Bella mumbled.

"When she returns." Edward felt the same way too, but he knew that the pain never ended until the person whom you missed was once again with you. They would have to live with the pain of their daughter's absence until they all were reunited again. "Seems we have company."

"It seems we do." Bella didn't even bother to move, for the familiar scent and sound of her old friend filled her senses.

Jacob had become so present in their lives the last seventeen years that his presence was fluid, coming and going easily as the wind. His appearance was never alarming or surprising but rather expected always. He let himself in the front door and made his way to sit beside them in the armchair nearest the bookcase.

Bella had never seen Jake like this before, to her he had always been the sun, warm, glowing, although sometimes tempestuous mainly life-giving. That Jacob was gone. In the last twenty-four hours since she had seen him last his whole demeanor had changed. The man who sat in front of her was lifeless, slow moving, devoid of all brightness or warmth. He seemed half-alive, if that was even possible. It dawned on her only then that as painful as this was for her, she was sure now that what she was feeling was nothing compared to her friend.

"I'm sorry you couldn't be there to see her off." Edward mumbled as his eyes left mine and found their way to Jacob.

"I thought it was better for her if I stayed behind. Besides we said our good-bye last night."

"We heard." Bella spoke with a nod.

"Sorry about that. I shouldn't have…I mean it was all wrong…we had a proper good-bye before and then I saw her leave and I just couldn't let her go without—"

"Timing's never really been your strong suit Jake." Edward said with a smile, but it didn't last for long for Bella punched his arm hard.

"Tell me about it. Was she mad?" Jake ran a hand over his face as if doing so would take back what he had done. When he didn't hear their response he looked up to find them only looking at each other as if deciding what was best to say. "She was wasn't she? I knew she would be."

"She's just confused, Jacob." Edward spoke calmly his eyes gazing back over at Jacob.

"Of course she is. I mean after all that happened between the three of us, how could she not be?" He exhaled. "No offense."

"None taken. You didn't tell her everything right?" Bella eyed him from across the room. Yet it was Jacob boyish expression of guilt that gave him away.

"Jacob!" Bella sat up straighter and threw the nearest pillow at his face. Jacob caught it just moments before it crashed into his face.

"She asked, Bella?! What was I supposed to do lie? She was bound to find out one way or another. So what if she knows that you and I kissed a couple of times?"

"I'm surprised she would even talk to me last night then."

"She doesn't blame you, Bella. She understands." Edward said comfortingly.

"How did everything get so complicated? It wasn't supposed to be like this." Jacob let out a large exhale as he sunk even lower in his chair.

"No matter what Renesmee may have told you Jake, there is no other person whom she cares for more than you. You two have a connection, whether she is ready to admit it or not. She just needs time to realize for herself how much she needs you."

"What if she doesn't though, Bella? What if she never does? What am I suppose to do?"

"We'll figure it out together, Jake. You are a part of this family, you always have been, and you always will be."

"You think Alice would have given us a heads up. 'Oh by the way Jake, Ness is about to tell you that she will be leaving tomorrow, just thought you would want to know'. It would have been nice." Jacob knew he was unleashing his temper. This wasn't Alice's fault, it was no body's fault, it just happened. Yet that was easier said than believed.

"Alice can only see possible outcomes from possible choices." Bella ran a hand through her hair. "She sees the two of you only through the lenses of other's decisions. You and Renesmee have always been blind spots in her vision. Your future is a wonderful mystery to her."

"Just great." Jacob sighed again as he rubbed his face with his hands, sitting forward in his chair.

"It'll be okay, Jake. She'll be back." Edward nodded assuredly.

"I think I may head north for a while. Clear my head." Jacob stood signaling his departure.

"Don't be gone too long, Jake. We'll miss you." Bella within a moment was by his side, her arms wrapped around his neck.

"Jeez, Bella." Jacob winced from her bone-crushing embrace. Bella let up slightly but didn't let go.

"Give her time, Jake. Trust me." She whispered into his ear. She felt him weaken at her words and she squeezed him one last time before slowly letting him go.

"You are always welcome here, Jacob. No matter how long she is gone, this will always be your home too." Edward rested a hand on his shoulder.

"Thanks." He said with a blank smile before he took a step towards the door. "See you later."

Before either Jacob or Bella could say anymore he was out the door and gone from their sight. Edward wrapped his arm around his wife and kissed the top of her head.

"How long do you think it will take before his journey north takes a hard detour south?" Edward said with a broad smile.

"I give it a week at the most." Bella laughed.

"You think Ness will mind him interrupting her journey to self-discovery?" Edward questioned as he led them back to their bedroom.

"A couple of nights alone in the jungle will solve that problem." Bella smiled up at him and she saw his eyes cloud over.

Before he could protest she pushed him up against the hallway wall, forcing several family pictures to crash to the floor. Edward seemed pleasurably startled, his mind side-tracked from his recent over-protective thoughts. Bella only laughed and placed a deep crushing kiss on his lips.