AN: I'm so so thankful to everyone who reviewed, followed, and faved! All your reviews were absolutely amazing and made my day incredible. For that I can only say thank you! The reason I'm continuing this fic is because of you lovely people. A small little mention here but to the guest reviewer "Bagel" you my friend are hilarious and awesome! Thank you. Look at me rambling...everyone's saying get to the chapter already gosh I know I know lol. Enjoy =)

Note: Song used is "Runaway Train" by Soul Asylum

Friday 10:02 PM

"You see anyone?"

"Nope. I think we're in the clear." Brendan glances around the corner one more time before he hastily pushes Stes wheelchair down the hall. They both try to appear as normal as can be. Ste even starts whistling and then stops once he realizes that's causing more attention to be drawn to them. Brendan takes him over to the North Wing this time as he has another spot he goes to on that side. There are less people in that wing so they get through it quickly. He wheels him outside and Ste takes in the surroundings. It's a little smaller than the last spot Brendan took him but it's still a good size. Instead of one large tree there are a lot lined up against the walls, basically blocking the windows of the hospital. There are flowers everywhere; Ste can't find one spot that doesn't have any. A small little hill waits at the top so Brendan wheels him to the bottom so there is no risk of him accidentally rolling down the hill. Although Brendan says that would be hilarious. Once they get settled Brendan grabs Ste out of the wheelchair and lays him down on the grass while he sits next to him.

"So how you feeling? Like your back and everything."

"Well if I try lifting myself into a seated position I get an excruciating pain all over my body."

"That's not good. How about your legs and arms? I know your right leg you can't move cause its broken and your left leg you told me just causes you discomfort right."

"Yeah basically. Umm my left arm hurts to move but I can bend it. The only part of my body that's fine is my right arm."

"Lucky that you're right handed huh."

"Yeah." Ste looks up at him and the stars and moon are shining in his eyes. He has never in his life seen someone as beautiful as him. He turns his head when he sees Brendan looks at him.

"What?"

"Nothing. Sorry." Ste starts blushing and hopes that the loss of daylight is concealing it.

Brendan doesn't say anything back but moves so he can lie down as well. "So can you spot any of those constellation stuff?"

It's a clear night and the stars are magnificently bright today. Ste turns his head every which way to try and locate one.

"Erm...oh wait wait yeah. There." Ste lifts his right arm with ease and points to an area in the sky. "It's called Cassiopeia." He sees Brendan squinting trying to figure out what he is supposed to be looking at. "It looks like a W. They say in Greek mythology it represents the wife of King Cephaus who sits nearby. And that one is right above it, the one that looks like a house turned sideways." Ste looks over and still sees Brendan turning his head left and right trying to find either one of these.

"You're such a dork Steven but I can't see any of these bloody things. Where am I looking at?"

Ste mumbles "idiot" under his breath but lifts his arm up again and traces the constellation with his finger. Brendan shuffles over as much as he can so he can see it.

"I would be an awful star...what are they called? Star locator?"

"Astronomer Brendan." Ste grabs Brendan's hand and flicks his index finger so that Brendan is now pointing. He finds it again and traces the first constellation. "See it looks like a W. That one is Cassiopeia. And right above it-" Ste moves Brendan's hand up and traces the other one "that one is Cephaus. Do you see them?"

"Yeah, I was looking at the completely wrong spot." Brendan interlocks their hands before he drops them both down and releases his hands from Stes. "So you really do like these things."

"Yeah I know this is gonna make me sound like a right loser but I actually have a book at home about stars. I don't know they just interest me and kind of makes you wonder about everything. Like what really exist in life. Or what's up there you know." He realizes he is rambling and gets self-conscience. "I'm talking too much ain't I? You want me to shut up?"

"No. I like it. Calms me I guess. And I don't think you're a loser for that. Maybe a bit of a geek but hey least your smart."

"I'm not even smart though."

"Steven I called an astronomer a star locater. I think you have me beat on this one."

Ste feels that feeling again. The butterflies in his stomach. Everyone always calls him stupid, even the people he calls friends. But Brendan of all people, the person that he thought looked like he could kill someone with no remorse a couple days ago, is saying he's not.

They go quiet for a couple minutes and just listen to the surroundings. They hear crickets, owls, leaves falling, and trees swaying. Ste looks over to his right side and is actually shocked when he sees a single lavender rose in the middle of the other flowers. He plucks it out of the ground and throws it at Brendan who is still looking up at the stars.

"Why'd you throw me this?" He picks it up and holds it up to see it better. "It's lavender. That's weird."

"I know. I only seen them at flower shops. You know what that color means?"

"Royalty?"

"That's purple Bren and rose colors mean different things."

"Alright so what then?"

"It means love at first sight or enchantment."

"Interesting." Brendan keeps looking at it. Ste notices he's not focusing on the flower at all but at what he just said. "You want it back?"

"No it's cool looking. Keep it."

"Thanks...I think." He whispers the last part but lifts himself up enough so he is able to place it on the wheelchair. "Umm it's just about to be 11:30 you wanna head back inside?"

"Not really. Do you?"

"No." He stands up and starts walking up the hill. "Wanted to do this when we got here." He lies back down at the top of the hill and rolls himself down it. For being a small hill he goes pretty fast and passes right by Ste, who is laughing his face off. He comes to a stop when he hits a small tree and then walks back to where Ste is in tears from laughter.

"What are you 12?!"

"You know if you could you would have done it too. Fuck I got grass all over me." He stays standing up as he brushes himself off.

Ste keeps looking at him not being able to drag his eyes away from him. The light emitted from the moon is casting a weird light behind him and he looks perfect. He can't even comprehend how someone can look like him. Ste sees him move his hand up and down his body trying to remove all the grass but it's doing things to Ste and he hopes Brendan doesn't notice.

"Is it in my hair?"

"What?" Ste snaps out of his trance and doesn't even hear him.

"Where were you a couple seconds ago. Steven land or something." Ste rolls his eyes at that but Brendan just gives him a smile. "I asked if any of the grass was in my hair."

"Oh sorry. Yeah actually, a couple."

Brendan lowers himself to his knees and leans over Ste who is still lying down. "I would just shake my hair but I don't wanna ruin it so can you just get it for me."

"Umm...yeah." Ste keeps telling him to keep calm. Relax. Don't do anything stupid. Brendan tilts his head over so that Ste can use his good arm and remove the pieces out of his perfectly styled hair. "Bren I can't get the front. Move your head to face me." Brendan tilts his head back and looks straight at him and leans down a little more so that he has access to the front. Ste takes out any pieces he sees and moves his hand down Brendan's cheek and then moves it to the back of his neck.

"What are you doing Steven?"

"Please." Ste pulls Brendan that extra bit closer without waiting for a response and meets his lips with Brendan's. He had described Brendan's lips as juicy, and he thinks to himself he was 100 % correct. Their wet from Brendan licking his lips constantly. At first Ste doesn't feel Brendan moving, in fact he can feel him tense up. He goes still. Ste just about stops until he feels Brendan's tongue swipe across his bottom lip and then he starts responding. Ste can't see anything after that, everything around him disappears. His heart feels as if it is going to explode. When he tries to push his tongue into Brendan's mouth he feels him stop again. This time Brendan completely stops and moves away. Ste opens his eyes and sees Brendan stand up quickly and run his hands through his hair.

"I'm...sorry...Bren. Should I have not-"

"Forget it. Just...I got to get you back inside before anyone notices." Brendan moves slightly slower to him and motions for Ste to grab onto him. The whole time Ste can feel how incredibly tense he is. He gets placed back onto his wheelchair and this time Brendan doesn't even take the extra time he usually does to adjust him. They don't speak to each other all the way back to his room.

Saturday 12:17 AM

The awkward silence is dreadful. Brendan is writing in Stes chart to detail how is back is still poor. They have been back in the room for about 10 minutes and no one has said anything. Ste turns on the tv to drown out the silence. Of course just their luck when he turns it on "Queer as Folk" is showing. Not to mention it's on a very X-Rated scene.

"Oh god." Ste fumbles with the remote trying to change it but ends up turning up the volume. Now instead of silence filling the room it gets replaced with loud moaning noises.

"Can you turn that off?" Brendan sounds annoyed already.

"What do you think I'm doing?" He hits the previous button and it switches to "Days of our Lives." Ste thinks to himself that this would have been a decent show to switch to if it hadn't been for the fact that right at that moment a guy and his boyfriend were discussing their first time together.

"Are you fucking kidding me. You doing this on purpose?"

"Yeah Brendan I called the tv stations themselves and got them to play these two shows at exactly the time we got back. Of course I'm not!" He ends up switching it again and sticks to the news station.

"Yeah whatever. Look I'm gonna take a break real quick. I'll be back in an hour or something." Brendan places the chart back in its spot in front of the bed and avoids eye contact as he heads to the door.

"Really Brendan? We need to talk."

"Nothing happened ok. Just...can you just drop it." He doesn't wait for a reply and walks out the door leaving Ste to think about what just happened. He keeps replaying it over and over in his head and even though he is slightly mad at him he can't help but smile. He runs his finger across his bottom lip and still feels Brendan's lips on his. He relaxes and switches the tv back to "Queer as Folk."

Saturday 12:30 AM

Brendan is heading in the direction of the break room and turns the corner only to slam straight into someone.

"Ah shit sorry sis wasn't paying attention. What are you doing back?"

"It's ok. There was some sort of pile up on the highway and a couple people were brought in to the ER so they called me in. I just got here a little bit ago just waiting for the ambulances to come. What's wrong with you?"

"What?"

"You seem...different."

"Different how?"

"I don't know you just look different I guess. Kinda tense and a little warm." Cheryl goes to touch his forehead but he moves away.

"I'm fine. Just getting used to this shift is all." He knows she won't believe that as he has had many of these shifts before. She must not be too concerned as she doesn't ask any more questions on the matter.

"Anyway so remember I told you the board of director is coming later on today right? He's gonna be here at 8 I believe so I just told him you would meet him in the afternoon since you get out at 6."

"I could have stayed over."

"No I rather you not speak to him after a 10 hour shift."

"Good point. What does he want to talk to me about anyway?"

"I don't know. What did he talk to you about 6 months ago?"

"Something about trying harder I think."

The doors come swinging open as stretchers full of people come through. "Looks like there here. Gotta go!" Cheryl waves and follows the rush of nurses. Brendan walks outside to the parking lot and gets inside his car. He turns on the radio and reclines his seat back.

'Can you help me remember how to smile? Make it somehow all seem worthwhile. How on earth did i get so jaded? Life's mysteries seem so faded. I can go where no one else can go, I know what no one else knows. Here I am just drownin' in the rain with a ticket for a runaway train'

Brendan looks out the window and sees a tall slim man in a long plaid trench coat. He stares at him as the man walks to his car and then drives away. Brendan's mind keeps remembering the trench coat. Brown with black plaid lines. It keeps replaying in his head over and over again. He closes his eyes for a second with the image engraved in his head.

*** You walk into your house hoping his not here. His car isn't outside so you assume he's out at a pub or better yet somewhere in a ditch, dead. You place your book bag on the counter and take a seat on the couch. It looks like no one is here. It's quiet. You look over to the kitchen table and see a coat there. An ugly brown trench coat. You never saw it before though. That's when you hear the garage door open and close.

"Ah Brenda. I was wondering where you were."

"Sorry Da I was just at the pier."

"Who with?"

"No one." He knows your lying to him.

"Really. You weren't with your friend Pete?" He emphasizes Pete and makes sure you hear the disgust in his voice.

"No."

"He's always around you. Seems strange he wouldn't be there today."

"We're just friends. I told you this a thousand times!" You don't know why you raised your voice at him but it's too late and you see him approaching you.

"Boy don't you speak to me in that tone."

Before you can apologize you're thrown onto the floor and you cover your face in fear. You don't feel anything happening so you open your eyes to see your dad grabbing that coat. He walks over to you and within a second he has it over your face. You're screaming and shouting "PLEASE DON'T." It hasn't worked in the past and you don't know why you even still believe he will listen to you. The coat pushes against your face and you smell the smoke on it. Makes you nauseous. Then you feel the impact of a punch straight to your ribs. Then again. And again. It stops and you think it's over. You breathe again but the coat still stays in place. Then you hear that familiar noise of metal clanking.***

Brendan wakes up slamming his head on to the top of the car. He tries getting his breathing under control but he can't. He's panicking. He fumbles through the car and finds what he's looking for. He takes a pill and swallows it without any water, but it won't take effect immediately. "Breathe" he keeps telling himself. He looks up again and his vision is blurry. It's the tears clouding his vision. He closes his eyes again to try to pull himself together and then hears the driver's side door open. Brendan looks over and sees the blonde curls. As if sensing her brother was in trouble. She shuffles in and brings his head into her shoulder. She doesn't say anything and they both remain in there in silence. After a while Cheryl pulls away and looks at Brendan.

"You ok now?

"Yeah I'm good. How did you know I was out here?

"Sisters intuition. Well that and I saw you walking out and I don't know you seemed lost when I was talking to you so just wanted to make sure you were ok. You want to tell me what happened?"

"Nothing happened."

"Really? You're gonna do this again Brendan. When are you gonna admit that you're not fine?" Cheryl gets out of the car but just crouches outside so that she's still looking straight into his eyes.

"I don't get why you think I'm not fine."

Cheryl laughs as soon as he says that but there's no emotion behind it. It's one of those laughs without anything to it. "You're right Brendan I don't have any reasons at all. Not even the one where I walk out and see you in tears."

"It wasn't tears." Brendan can't look at her anymore so he just stares straight ahead.

"Sure sure. Look Brendan what is it going to take for you to realize you need someone in your life that you can open yourself up to? You obviously aren't going to tell me what's going on in your head but you need to tell someone. I don't want to wake up and not have my brother there in my life. I love you so much Brendan. So so much. This breaks my heart. Every time. I just want to see that smile again. The one where I could see it in your eyes. The one where it would lift me from my sadness. The one that would light up a room. I want those bright blue eyes to come alive. But you know what I see in them? Pain, hurt, sadness, fear. Please you need to see someone." Cheryl doesn't realize that she's crying until Brendan wipes them away for her.

"Do you think I want to be like this Cheryl? Believe me I would love to be normal. I don't want to be like this. I don't. But I can't Cheryl. I can't."

"Bren you are normal. You just need some help.

"I'm not. I'm a freak."

Saturday 2:28 AM

Ste is sound asleep. He waited and waited but Brendan never came back. He doesn't know if it was the medicine that made him sleepy or if it was his need of having this day over. Brendan walks in and notices that he's asleep. He still has 4 hours left in his shift and doesn't know what else to do. He takes a seat in the chair and turns on the tv. Luckily it was low in volume so Ste doesn't wake up. Brendan looks back over at Ste and gently runs his finger over Stes hand. He pulls away as Ste moves slightly. Doesn't wake up though. Nothing interesting is on so he drifts in and out of the show he is watching. He leans back and something slips out if his pocket onto the floor. When he looks down to pick it up there's the lavender flower. Brendan picks it up and lays it in the palm of his hand. There in his hand lies a rose without the lavender petals.

Please don't hate me for this chapter...I gave y'all the kiss finally. But come on it's no fun if it was all good in the hood immediately. Review pretty please. Let me know if y'all still like this?