Author's note: Haineko's the only filler character I feel like writing lemons for. There's plenty of cuties in the anime, but Haineko's the only one who fits the busty standards that Bleach fans are used to.

A zanpakuto is part of the user's soul, right? So if somebody had sex with their zanpakuto, would that be, like, spiritual masturbation?

I don't own Bleach.

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"You can't be serious." The statement came from one incredulous Ichigo Kurosaki, directed at his blonde girlfriend Rangiku Matsumoto.

"Aw, come on, Ichi! It'll be fun!" Rangiku chirped. The two had been dating for awhile, and had grown quite close. While the zanpakuto spirits had been out and about, Rangiku had been spending a lot of time getting reacquainted with her zanpakuto, the cat spirit Haineko. While out drinking one night, the two began to discuss Rangiku's new relationship. As Haineko talked about how cute Ichigo was, Rangiku got a wicked idea. Haineko lit up as Rangiku explained it. It would take effort, but she was sure she could get Ichigo to agree to it.

"Yeah. I'm a part of her soul. When you think about it, it's not cheating." Haineko said, zipping up to Ichigo's side and hugging his arm.

Ichigo began to sweat, his heart pounding against his chest. He knew that Rangiku was very open sexually, but he hadn't expected-this! He was no longer a virgin, but Ichigo still wasn't a guy who constantly thought about sex. Even so, he had found it much harder to resist Rangiku's charms after the two became intimate. Still, a threesome? With a zanpakuto spirit?

Still...Haineko was very good looking. He looked into her vibrant green eyes, gazing over her features in a way he usually resisted doing with women. Breasts that were as large and firm as her owner's, wide, voluptuous hips, an endearing catty smile, dark, tasty looking skin...Rangiku had given him permission, hadn't she?

"W-well, m-maybe..." Ichigo stuttered, incapable of directly giving a "Yes".

Haineko cheered, throwing her arms over her head before throwing them around his neck. She mashed her lips against his, instantly inserting her tongue into his mouth. The sudden glomp knocked Ichigo off balance, causing him to crash into his bed. He still felt odd making out with someone while his girlfriend stood only a few feet away, but a little awkwardness was worth the promise of the paradise to come. Slowly, Ichigo brought his hands up to rest on Haineko's ass, gripping it softly. Haineko grinned inwardly, glad that he was starting to get into it. Ichigo felt an odd pressure around his leg, before he realized that Haineko's tail had wrapped itself around his thigh.

Haineko pulled back slightly, running her tongue over Ichigo's lips. She sat up and pulled her shirt over her head. Ichigo's breath died in his throat at the sight of her bare breasts, dark nipples hardening as they were exposed to the air. They really were as big as Rangiku's. Sensing that he might need a little guidance to break him out of his stupor, Haineko took his hands and placed them directly on her breasts. Ichigo's fingers practically sank into the flesh as he filled his hands.

Ichigo heard a slight rustling of clothing, alerting him to the fact that Rangiku was getting undressed. Ichigo glanced over to see what she was doing, and saw that she was rubbing massage oil all over her chest. Oh, hell...he knew what she was getting ready for...

Haineko moved off of him and sat next to the upper half of his body. She moved him so that he was resting in her lap, his head settled against the crook of her arm. From this position Ichigo's face was right next to her bosom. Ichigo moved his left hand to one breast, while placing his lips over the nipple closest to his face. Haineko gasped and sighed blissfully as he pleasured her. Her owner might have been an old hag, but she had excellent taste in men.

Suddenly Ichigo choked. Rangiku had finally made her move. She had put his dick between her tits, the sticky oil making his hard shaft slide effortlessly between the giant mounds of flesh. Rangiku was one of the few women with the assets capable of pleasing him this way, and they both loved making use of her body.

Feeling like his hormones were ready to burst, Ichigo squeezed and sucked Haineko harder. He would detach his mouth to give her nipple a long lick, nuzzling his face into the massive tit as his breathing became more ragged. As much as Haineko was enjoying this, she had a better idea. Something that would really drive him wild.

"Be right back." She said, giving him a parting kiss. She laid his head onto his pillow before moving down. She wasn't...Ichigo cried out. She was. Rangiku had moved to the side to give Haineko room to join her, and Haineko pressed her sizeable chest against Rangiku's, Ichigo's dick trapped between them. The feeling was overwhelming. Ichigo clutched at his sheets, feeling lightheaded. The close contact spread the oil to Haineko, light strands of the substance connecting each time they pulled their breasts apart. They darted their tongues out, licking the head of his penis whenever it poked up from their bosoms.

Ichigo was in heaven. His mind was void of all thought, except for the feeling of his dick sliding between the two massive pairs of tits. He was so out of it that he couldn't warn them that release was only a few seconds away. Luckily, Rangiku recognized the signs.

"Here it comes." Rangiku whispered, noticing the increased twitching of his dick. Haineko licked her lips, eager to taste Ichigo's seed.

Ichigo exploded, his discharge spraying all over the girls, coating their faces and getting stuck in their hair. They separated, cleaning themselves off and licking Ichigo's semen from their fingers. Ichigo watched them through bleary eyes, noticing the way Haineko cleaned herself off exactly like a regular cat.

Ichigo recovered from the experience surprisingly quick. Before they could react, he grabbed Haineko, who shrieked in surprise as he threw her on her stomach. There was no more hesitation. Rangiku smirked. Ichigo might have been a little shy, but once you got him worked up, he was incredible.

Ichigo mounted Haineko, tearing her shorts off and roughly squeezing her ass. Haineko was surprised by the turnaround, but certainly not displeased. Ichigo grabbed her hips and pulled her into a kneeling position. He ran his hands over her ass, before giving it a few hard slaps. Her body quaked and jiggled, and Ichigo loved the sight of her rolling flesh. Deciding that he had had enough of foreplay, Ichigo straightened up and jammed his dick into the pussy's pussy. Normally Ichigo was a slow, gentle lover, but if they wanted an animal, he'd give them one.

"Ahh! Ichigo! Fuck me! Fuck me! You're amazing!" Haineko screamed praise while Ichigo practically pulverized her. He ran his hands all over her body, dimly noting that she felt a lot like Rangiku. Ichigo wasn't in the most observant state of mind at the moment so he wasn't able to give an exact comparison. Haineko's tail repeatedly brushed against his chest as he took her, tickling him and adding to the arousal he was feeling.

Haineko's tongue hung out, eyes rolled back and panting heavily. Ichigo filled her up completely, every stab of his dick making her feel like she was on fire. It was too much for her, her legs giving out as she collapsed flat on the bed. Ichigo followed, continuing to pound into her. He decided to take advantage of her position, moving her on her side and lifting her leg into the air. This allowed Ichigo to penetrate her even deeper.

After awhile, Ichigo looked over to Rangiku, who had been rubbing herself to the sight of Ichigo taking her zanpakuto so violently. He gestured to her, telling her to come over and help him. After Rangiku made her way over, Ichigo pointed to the leg he was holding. Rangiku wrapped her arms around it, supporting Haineko so Ichigo had free use of his hands. Ichigo gave each of Rangiku's pert tits a squeeze, before moving his hand to the back of her head, yanking her to his lips so they could make out while Ichigo fucked Haineko.

Haineko screamed, Ichigo's aggression making her cum before Ichigo was finished. He shifted her again, this time laying her on her back and placing his hands back on her waist so he could fully focus on reaching his climax. Rangiku kept her arms wrapped around Ichigo's torso, nuzzling her face into his neck, his sex noises making her drip. Ichigo finally came, bucking his hips wildly as he filled Haineko to the brim.

Ichigo was gasping hard, his heart feeling like it was going to rip right out of his chest. He pulled himself out of Haineko, some of his semen leaking out as he did. As his normal personality reasserted itself, Ichigo looked over Haineko's limp body, wondering if he had been too rough with her. However, the dazed look in her eyes and the wide grin on her face told him that she was perfectly fine with how their coupling ended up. Soon, Ichigo felt a familiar pair of breasts pressed against his back, and a slender hand gripping his cock.

"Got one more in you, Ichigo?" Rangiku asked, stroking him.

"Definitely." Ichigo said. He laid down on his back, Rangiku climbing on top of him. He needed a little time to get back up to full mast, the experience with Haineko having taken a lot out of him. To help him out, Rangiku lifted her left breast to his mouth. Grinning, Ichigo kissed her nipple, prodding it with his tongue as he suckled her. She continued to stroke him, and eventually he was ready for one last round. She guided him into her. After doing so much else with him, her aching sex accepted the organ gratefully.

Rangiku bounced on him, her hot pussy squeezing him greedily. Ichigo took the time to admire the full splendor of Rangiku's legendary tits, before reaching out to grab a handful of heaven. The sound of Rangiku's sultry voice moaning in pleasure was music to his ears. Rangiku ran her hands up and down his strong arms, Ichigo letting go so that they could lock hands as they pushed and pulled against each other. Soon enough, Rangiku threw her head back and screamed, gripping his hands tightly as the pressure in her loins finally broke through, leaving a mess of his lap. Lightning flashed behind Ichigo's eyes as he came, blasting Rangiku's insides with white.

Rangiku slid off of Ichigo, cuddling next to his right and laying her arm across him. Haineko summoned the strength to move to Ichigo's left, laying her head on his chest and purring happily.

"There. That wasn't so bad, was it?" Rangiku asked.

"Ungh." Was all the response Ichigo could manage. His brain was too toasted to engage in meaningful conversation.

Rangiku smiled, moving her hand to grasp Haineko's as they snuggled up next to him. Rangiku would have to see if Kisuke knew a way to bring Shinigami into each other's personal world. She certainly wouldn't mind making this a regular occurrence.

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Next chapter: Ichigo/Yoruichi