AN: This chapter just killed me. I couldn't write a decent chapter to save my life...but it's done! I wanna thank you guys for the wonderful reviews. Absolutely made my day!
HUGE MENTION: Amber! (AmberScanlan1234) this chapter is dedicated to you. You really do inspire me and I feel so so blessed to have you as my friend. Thank you for all the laughs and random conversations! Seriously you're just the absolute best! Heart you! =)
Tuesday 9:40 PM
***All you hear is him colliding into everything outside your room. He's clearly drunk as you hear glass fall on the floor. It's just about to be midnight and all you want is to sleep. That's not asking much. Just a couple hours where you don't have to deal with life. Suddenly it goes quiet outside and it's strange unless he fell on the floor and knocked out. You figured if you cared about him you would go check, but you don't. Instead you pull the covers over you and drown out any other noise. A couple minutes later you hear him again saying the familiar chant of "Brenda." He will come get you himself if you don't go so you might as well get it over with. With your track suit bottoms on, you grab a white Tshirt off the floor and walk out of your room. There he is sitting at the kitchen table with a bottle of scotch in his hand.
"Yeah?" You don't know exactly where you should stand at so you choose to lean against the counter, opposite of him.
"Saw you and Pete walking around town today. Looked like you two were some sort a queer couple."
You can't take this anymore. Everyday it's the same thing. It's always Pete this and Pete that. You don't even spend that much time around him but to your 'father' it's enough.
"I'm not gay Seamus." You rarely call him dad anymore unless Cheryl is around or when it's your only escape from his brutal beatings.
"Those lips tell a different story."
You're actually confused and stare at him for an explanation but you can already feel that by the end of the night another part of you is going to be tainted.
"Those lips are perfect for sucking cock Brenda. I think it's time you learned how, considering you will most likely be doing it throughout your life you little faggot."
You shake your head trying to tell him you don't want to do this. It's not right. This is just his form of humiliating you.
"No I don't...I don't want too." You ask for someone, anyone to hear your silent pleas. But like all the times before this, no one comes. They never help you. You never get saved.
Seamus advances towards you and hits you right on the throat completely making you fall onto the floor in pain. Once again you can't breathe, it's becoming a tradition really. You think Seamus gets some sort of sick pleasure from seeing you gasping for air. He drags you across the tile flooring but throws you under the table. While he starts to seat down he unbuckles and zips down his fly.
"I don't want to see your face during this you got it." He drags the chair forward and pulls you onto your knees and gives you one last smack across the face. "Suck."
The last thing you remember is looking down counting all the little spots on one of the square tiles.
There was 237. ***
Brendan wakes up in a cold sweat and tries to move but finds some sort of pressure keeping him down. When he looks around he sees he's not in his bedroom. It takes him a few more seconds to realize he's still at work. Not only that but he's currently lying on Stes bed. When he looks over he sees Ste sound asleep but he has one arm over his chest. The grip is tight and secure as if Ste refuses to let anyone get him. Brendan feels...safe. For one time in his life he feels like someone is looking after him. But then the other emotion comes in where he hates feeling like he can't take care of himself, like he's this weak person that needs help. He doesn't.
"Steven?" When Ste doesn't move Brendan tries to lightly move his arm off him. He only shuffles closer to Brendan.
"Wake up Steven I'm gonna get in trouble if someone walks in." And right on cue Cheryl walks in.
"Hey Ste I was-" She stops mid-sentence and the expression on her face would be laughable under different circumstances. "What are-" her mouth opens and closes so many times. It's as if her mind is trying to get out a sentence but there's so many questions that they all get jammed coming out. "Are you-" her eyes widen and she keeps looking between the two of them. "Finish this and come to my office. Immediately." She slams the doors as she leaves.
Brendan kisses Ste on the nose and that seems to do the trick. Stes eyes slowly open and he gives Brendan a shy smile.
"Hi."
"Hey...umm...can you move your arm. Please?"
"Oh sorry."
As soon as he does, Brendan jumps off the bed but stays next to it.
"Not your fault just...Cheryl walked in and-"
"Oh great. Now she's actually going to kill me. Did she ask you to explain or anything?"
"No and even if she did I wouldn't even know what to say. Umm...how did I get in bed with you?"
"You don't remember what happened before you fell asleep, do you?"
Brendan tries to re play the scene in his head and the last part he remembers is himself seating down. Beside that he has no clue. There's no memory of anything else.
"Not really no. Fill me in."
"Erm...earlier you kind of held me down-" Ste looks at Brendan and sees him cringe when he hears 'held me down' "-and said a couple things so when you came back we got into another row. You were being an asshole...I'm sorry but you were and then all the sudden you like went into some trance. You were talking but not to me. I kept trying to snap you out of it but couldn't. The only thing I could think to do was hold you. So I did. I kept my hold on you until you finally stopped shaking and fell asleep."
"I'm sorry-" Ste tries reaching out to him and stop him "-no not for that. I'm sorry for anything I said earlier. I'm sorry for putting my hands on you, I wouldn't...I wouldn't hurt you. I promise. I didn't know-"
Ste extends his hand out and motions for Brendan to get back in bed.
"Steven I can't."
"I'm not asking you to stay here just come here real quick."
Brendan climbs back into the bed but doesn't lie down. He stays on his knees instead.
"What now?"
Ste motions for him to move over him so Brendan ends up straddling him again but doesn't move.
"I don't know what's going on in your mind Brendan but you need help. I need you to understand that I won't turn my back on you. We will get through this together. No matter what you do I won't stop fighting for you. I want to help you get better."
"I can't change Steven."
"Look at me. I am not gonna give up on you ok. I won't give up on you."
Ste reaches around and grabs him around the waist. Brendan gives in and dips down. Their foreheads connect and Ste moves his hands to the back of Brendan's neck.
"Thank you." Brendan lays one hand on Stes cheek and gives him a warm-hearted kiss on the lips before he leaves.
Tuesday 10:10 PM
When Brendan walks into Cheryl's office she already has an exasperated look on her face. He mirrors her actions and takes a seat.
"So are you finally going to say it? I mean like actually SAY it?"
Brendan rises from his seat and is about to leave when Cheryl speaks again.
"Yeah Brendan walk away. Just like you always do when this topic comes up."
"I'm not. I just don't want to talk about it."
"Just tell me. I already know. Why can't you for once in your life just say it out loud?"
"Cause I'm not."
"YOU ARE! Did that worthless piece of shit screw up your head that much to the point you can't even admit who you are Bren. You're gay. I known since you were 15."
Brendan leans back on the wall and slides down all the way till he hits the floor. "I can't say it."
Cheryl walks over to him and takes a spot next to him on the floor. "You already have so many things on your shoulders Bren this shouldn't be one of them. I will love you regardless."
"I know but once I say it I'm saying he was right along. You know that I was this weak fragile son that deserved...you know."
"YOU NEVER DESERVED THAT. Never." Cheryl moves to sit in front of him. "Look at me. You did NOT deserve any of that. I will not listen to you say that. He...he was scum. A waste of space in this world. He was the weak one. Not you. You have more strength than anyone. I just want you to see how absolutely amazing you are inside and out." She takes hold of his left hand and rotates the ring he has on his finger. "I know mum would agree."
"You're so close sweetie."
"I can't mum."
"Yes you can. One more branch."
Brendan reaches as far as he can and is able to grab onto the tree branch above him. He pulls himself up and takes a seat on it while looking down at his mom.
"You did it! I'm so proud of you!"
Brendan can help but smile. He feels really good about himself and wants to go even higher.
"No no no Brendan. I don't want you to get hurt. Come back down."
He reluctantly climbs back down carefully and runs into his mother's open arms. She ruffles his hair and hugs him tight.
"See and you thought you couldn't do it."
"I know."
She pats the seat next to her on the bench and Brendan jumps up. She grabs the paper bag she brought and takes out a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, apple slices, and a brownie.
"Eat the sandwich first Brendan." She says to him as he was about to take a giant bite out of the brownie.
Brendan eats his lunch as he swings his legs back and forth. He looks up at the sky and tries to make shapes out of the clouds.
"Is that were you're going mum." Brendan mumbles as he points up towards the sky.
"Yes sweetie. But you still have me for a couple more months. And even when I'm gone I'll always be around you Brendan. You can even call me your guardian angel if you want."
"I don't want you to go."
"I don't want go either but the doctors can't help me anymore Brendan. No no...don't cry." She holds onto him as tight as her deteriorating body can. "Shh it's ok. It's ok. It's ok."
They end up leaving the park and head home. When she opens the door she quickly glances around the room then moves aside so Brendan can walk in. He flops onto the sofa and turns on some cartoons.
"Brendan come in here for a sec."
Brendan walks into his mother's room and sits down on the floor. She takes a seat in front of him and opens up her hand. In her palm is a black band ring.
"I got this for you when you were born. I was going to give it to you on your 18th birthday but I won't be around to see that so I'm giving it to you now. It's a bit big but in a couple of years you'll be able to wear it."
She places it on Brendan's hand which he now has open.
"Whenever you feel alone look at that ring and remember that I'm there. Whenever you're happy look down and know I'm smiling with you. Whenever you feel scared I'm there holding your hand. Look at this ring as a sign of strength Brendan. You can do anything. You are re best gift god ever gave to me and I love you so much. Don't forget me ok."
"I promise I won't mum."
Cheryl watches him as he starts to shake a bit.
"Bren you ok?"
"I'm fine."
She knows he's not. In a split second she loses him again. He brings up his knees and covers his face with them. His hands are trembling as he rocks back and forth.
"No! No! No! Get off me!"
Cheryl backs away as she knows one of these types of episodes result in him lashing out and last time it ended with her getting a kick to her leg for being too close to him. She got a small bruise and Brendan kept apologizing so many times that Cheryl had to scream at him that it wasn't his fault.
"Why do I have to say it?"
She looks at her brother and feels like a knife is going straight through her heart. She physically can feel a sharp pain in her chest as she has to bare witness to this. His eyes are open but there's nothing behind them. They look dead to Cheryl. He's completely disconnected to reality. She can't watch anymore when she sees her brother violently grip his belt and hold on. The tears start falling from her face as she hides behind the desk and has to hear her brothers' 8 year old self plea for help.
"Say it boy. Or I'll keep doing it."
Cheryl starts hyperventilating as she hears Brendan impersonating their father. He's spot on with the voice and it brings back so many memories. Awful memories.
"Brendan! Stop! He's not here." She shouts at him as she tries getting her breath back.
"I...I...like it. I like...I like...when you do this."
That's all she can take. She drags herself all the way to him. She refuses to allow him to even speak those words. He may not even know what's happening but she will not let that monster make him admit that again. Cheryl sees her brother with tears running down his face and shaking all over.
"Brendan please come back. Can you hear me? I'm right here with you. You're not there. It's all in your mind. You need to come back to reality. Please."
She places a hand on his knee and he loses it.
"DON'T TOUCH ME! DON'T YOU EVER TOUCH ME!"
He starts kicking and throwing punches in the air. Cheryl luckily dodges the punch and says to hell with it and jumps right back in front of Brendan.
"LOOK AT ME! IT'S JUST ME!"
He starts to throw another punch and Cheryl braces herself for it. When she doesn't feel anything she opens her eyes and sees the life coming back into Brendan. His eyes turn from black to blue again. He's looking around to figure out where he is.
"You're back."
Brendan looks at his sister and she looks terrified. She's putting on a fake smile for him but he could read her like a book. Her eyes tell the whole story and they are reflecting sadness and fear. He figured he just had another episode and it probably wasn't pretty.
"Chez...I didn't...I didn't hit you right?"
"No you didn't. I'm fine. Are you ok?"
"Don't. Don't ask me that. I know I almost struck you or something for you to have that look on your face and yet you still want to know if I'm ok."
"Yes! When will you get it in your head Brendan that my number one priority is you? I could care less about myself. I just...I can't lose you. But I am. You're losing touch with reality Brendan. You're...you're losing this fight."
He knows he is. He's been knocked down so many times but keeps lifting himself back up. Mentally he's exhausted. His mind can't take much more. This long standing fight between himself and his past was always going to go one way. He knew it. Cheryl knew it. All they are waiting for is that final punch.
"Never said I would win."
Tuesday 10:45 PM
Cheryl dragged Brendan into a restroom and made sure they both didn't look like they had just been crying. Many eye drops later they went back to her office where she made sure he was ok to finish up his shift. It was only a couple more minutes so he said he would be fine.
Brendan goes to the North Wing first to make sure that patient is asleep, and she is. So he heads back to the West Wing to check on Laura but she's also asleep. His last stop is to see Ste. Knowing him he probably has stayed up waiting for Brendan to come say goodnight.
He's up.
"Hiya!"
Brendan doesn't necessarily feel joyful nor does he want to smile. But it's something about seeing Stes entire face light up when he sees him walk in that gets him every time. The gray cloud over his head suddenly disappears and he's content again. Just being in this room with Ste does something to him. It grounds him.
"Hi. Why you still up?"
"Well I was waiting for you to say bye."
"So I'm now expected to come see you before I leave." He says it playfully and is sure his eyes show he's not serious.
"Yeah basically."
"Guess I can manage that for...you."
Ste once again holds his hand out and tells Brendan to come over. Brendan does a quick glance outside the door and makes sure no one is around before he moves.
"Steven I'm not some doll you can just order around."
"For now you are as I can't do much."
"Yeah yeah yeah but once you're all healed up, I'm gonna get you back for all this."
"Can't wait." Ste licks his lips and waits for Brendan to get on the bed. "Seriously why do you always do this to me?"
"Do what?" Brendan did get on the bed but is sitting opposite of him.
"The distance."
"What do you want me to do exactly?"
"You know what?"
He must be lucky today because Brendan starts crawling to him and gets on top, not making any contact.
"Now what?"
"Can you, you know." Ste places his hands on Brendan's waist.
Brendan straddles Stes legs and places both his hands on the bed rails next to him. He starts grinding on him slowly and picks up on the intensity as he continues.
"Oh fuck...faster Bren."
Brendan moves to lie on top of him and spreads Stes legs for him enough so that he can get in between. Ste can feel Brendan is already hard as he starts to roll his hips on him. Ste moves his hands under Brendan's shirt and finally is able to feel his skin. He runs his fingers as far as they can and drags his nails back down making Brendan moan into the side of his neck. He's been sucking on his neck and Ste can feel Brendan's teeth biting him every so often. He assumes Brendan likes it extremely rough so this can't be easy on him to even be this gentle. He starts pushing down on him with force causing Stes back to give him a small bit of pain.
"You alright?" Brendan looks at him and Ste is transfixed. His eyes are dilated and pure black. His lips are glistening from the amount of saliva he has had to use. Not to mention he's panting. Ste can't speak but nods and pulls him back onto him. He feels his shirt get pulled up and then Brendans lips starts working his way down. His tongue effortlessly tease him all over. He licks his nipple and then sucks on it causing Stes hips to thrust up. He winces as he feels the pain that just caused.
"You can't stay still can you."
Ste hits him slightly as Brendan gets back to what he was doing.
"You're so fucking beautiful." He reaches the top of his track suit bottoms and looks up at him as if asking for permission.
"Umm wait wait come back up here."
"What for?"
"Just come here."
Ste laughs when he hears Brendan release a frustrated sigh.
"You first."
Brendan can't comprehend what's happening as he stares at Stes golden toned skin below him. "First what?"
Ste is stalling. He's beyond nervous and thinks this plan of his will calm him down. "I mean umm can I you know...see it?"
"See what?" His train of thought still hasn't come back to him yet.
Ste knows he must be extremely red all over. "Your you know...dick."
Brendan stares at him and once again Ste can't tell what he's thinking.
"Why?"
"You're so difficult Brendan."
"What the hell did I do?"
"Oh great now were about to argue again."
"Steven I'm not gonna argue with you when I was just about to put my mouth on your cock." He pauses for a second as he thinks of another compromise. "I want to taste you Steven. You really gonna deny me that?"
Ste makes no move to answer and keeps his lips sealed.
"Fine you win." Brendan takes hold of Stes hand and moves it down to his waistband. They keep eye contact as he pushes both their hands into his boxers and feels Ste grab his rock hard shaft. "Pull it out."
Stes eyes bulge out as he actually sees the size of him. His hand gets a firmer grip and he looks up into Brendan's eyes. Brendan slides his thumb against the head and gathers some of the pre cum off onto his finger.
"Open your mouth." It's a downright order and Ste opens up willingly. "You can suck now."
The obscene noises coming out of Stes mouth as he sucks makes it difficult for Brendan to stay still. He grips his own cock and starts to move his hand up and down. Their eyes meet again and they both see fire pulsing in them. Without any hesitation Brendan takes his other hand and reaches into Stes pants and takes hold of his member. He starts working both of them at the same rhythm.
"Oh my god...Bren! Just..."
Brendan teases the tip of Stes cock with his thumb and feels the liquid just dripping from it. His vision starts to cloud and all he can see is Ste who looks like he is in complete bliss. His eyes can't stay open but when Brendan catches a glimpse of them it sends a chill all throughout his body. He's addicted to him. Ste is his drug. This boy that walked into his life only a week ago has become his medicine.
Brendan achingly strokes Stes shaft as he looks down at the quivering boy beneath him. He forgets about his own pleasure and focuses on giving Ste everything he wants.
"Look at me Steven."
Ste musters up any control he has to make eye contact. Brendan keeps a tight hold on him and starts to strip his cock raw. It's not gentle anymore it's pure animistic. The adrenaline pumping through both of them is intense. Ste forgets about his back and starts trusting his hips up fucking Brendan's hand. They become in sync with one another.
"Bren! I'm...I can't hold..."
The wave of pleasure shoots all through his body as he cums all over Brendan's hand. He looks up to see Brendan licking off every last bit of him off his hand.
"Aren't you delicious." Brendan smirks at him and leans down for a passionate kiss. Ste can taste himself but at this point he couldn't care less. After what feels like forever Brendan stops.
"I really should get going but this was...nice."
"Nice? That's it."
"Yep." He smiles at him playfully and jumps off the bed making sure he looks presentable. "I look alright?"
"You look better than alright."
"Shut up. I come in at 5 tomorrow I think so I'll see you a bit later yeah."
"Too right you will."
"Too right I will."
They affectionately kiss one more time before Brendan heads off for the night.
Wednesday 4:13 PM
"Umm has the universe suddenly collapsed on itself."
"What are talking about Chez."
"You're on time. No wait you're early. I'm speechless."
"I been early before."
Cheryl gives him one of her signature 'we both know that's a lie' look.
"Ok fine but I was trying to do work at home and kept getting distracted so decided to just see if I could focus more here."
Cheryl takes a seat on the table with him and takes a look at all the paperwork around him. "What exactly are you doing?"
"Well I'm thinking Laura probably has some rare condition and I'm trying to pinpoint what it could be."
"We done almost every test on her and everything comes up normal."
"Yeah I know but it has to be something."
Cheryl's pager goes off signaling her that a trauma patient is on the way. "Well go over to the supply ward and see about researching some of the older diseases. Might lead you somewhere. I gotta go." She lightly taps him on the back and rushes out of the cafeteria.
Brendan is so focused on the patient charts that he doesn't even register anything happening around him. He especially didn't hear a particular person approaching him.
"Brendan. Nice to see you here on time."
"What?" Brendan peels his eyes away from the chart and lifts his head up to see the stupid annoying irritating smirk on Eoghans dumb disgusting hideous face. "Had work to do. What do you want?" He goes back to staring at his papers and hopes that Eoghan gets the message he doesn't want to chat.
"Hello to you too."
"Yeah yeah hey...bye."
"I'm not done here." Eoghan takes the chair opposite of him and looks through some of his paperwork. "Shame you still can't figure it out."
"I'm trying."
"You been trying for months."
Brendan slams the chart closed and throws the pen on the table. Eoghan always does this. Not once has he ever gotten a compliment on anything job related. Countless of meetings he has attended and witnessed everyone else get a 'good job' except for him. He could care less if he got the compliment but what he hates is when Eoghan looks at him and in front of the whole staff says 'work a little harder Brendan.' Then the staff all look at him and he sees some of them whispering to each other like he's some sort of joke. One time he ended up kicking the back of Wills' wheelchair when he made a sly comment to Eoghan about him. Apparently he doesn't know his own strength as Will ended up toppling over onto the floor. He couldn't contain the smile on his face as he saw Will flailing around like a fish. That was a good day.
"Now are you done?"
"No actually I did want to talk to you. Your annual progress report is coming up."
"Great. Good. Fantastic. Leave." Brendan is sick of seeing his face. Not to mention have to hear his voice. He compares it to nails going down a chalkboard. Does his head in.
"Oh you're so touchy today Brendan. What was your score last time?"
"88."
"With a little help right."
"Yeah I guess."
"I looked at where you stand right now and let's just say you're far from passing. You might need help again."
Brendan knows he most likely has a dreadful score but he really doesn't want to take Eoghans 'help.'
"Maybe but it might go up."
"I'm sure it will but it still won't get you to a 70."
"What do you want from me?"
"Brendan I'm only looking out for your best interest. I know you need this job. I'm on your side remember. If it was anyone else they would have already been fired but I have kept you around."
"Yeah why's that?"
Brendan wants to puke his guts out when he sees Eoghans face at that moment. Of course he already knows one of the reasons he keeps him here.
"I'm pretty sure you know why. Anyway when you make up your mind you know what to do." Eoghan stands up and looks at Brendan again. "Don't stress yourself out so much I wouldn't want to see that gorgeous face of yours have lines all over it." He laughs as walks away from him.
"Fucking prick."
Wednesday 5:27 PM
Mitzeee and Brendan have been skipping on work for the past 20 minutes as they hid in one of the supply rooms. Of course being as there aren't any doors to the rooms they are crouched down in the corner behind a shelf filled with drugs.
"You're hogging it all Brendan! Give me a sip."
"You already took two sips...no gulps more like it."
She easily takes it out of his hand as he really wasn't doing a good job keeping it away from her. How they found a bottle of whiskey in a hospital no one will ever know. It was in the East Wings break room so they just stole it and made a run for it.
"You sure they won't come looking for it Brendan?"
"Naw their too lazy to even walk all the way over here. Besides we will just hid it somewhere I guess." He takes another swig of it before he passes it back to Mitzeee.
"Ok last one as we both just started our shifts. Don't want to be drunk at work."
"I would."
"Shut up." She pushes him and he topples over falling straight on the ground. "Oh for fucks sake Brendan you better not be tipsy."
He laughs and winks at her as he pulls himself back up and leans his back on the wall.
"So what's up? You look like you have a lot on your mind."
"I don't."
"Come on Brendan. I can't see your mind going like a mile a minute. Is it Cheryl? I thought you two were working something out."
"No it's not her. We're talking at least but I'm sure we'll get into another fight again soon."
"Most likely. So what is it then?"
Brendan isn't really a talkative person. He doesn't enjoy telling people what is actually going through his mind. If he was to tell them a small portion of what he sees they wouldn't be able to handle it. It's not something that he feels people need to take on their shoulders. He was cursed with this life and no one else needs to have to endure it.
"It's nothing."
Mitzeee starts twirling her hair around her finger and starts whistling a song.
"Cut it out."
"Nope not until you talk."
"Ugh why are we even friends?"
"Cause you can't get rid of me." She pauses for a second and then plasters on the hugest smile imaginable. "Soooo...how are you and Ste?"
"What?" Brendan almost chokes on his own spit.
"Spill the deets. What's happening there? You tell him you like him."
"Why would I do that?"
"Ah ha! You didn't deny it." She does a small victory dance. "If you didn't like him you would have answered me back with 'I don't like him' so shove that in your face Brady."
"No you cow I meant why would I tell him that when I don't. Stick that in your face Minniver."
She starts slap him lightheartedly and goes to mess up his hair that he spent a good 20 minutes on.
"You like him! You like him! You kissed him haven't you?"
Apparently Brendan takes a bit longer to reply and Mitzeee is all over it.
"Oh my god! You have! I was joking I didn't think you actually did. So fucking cute."
"I didn't even say anything."
"Yeah but you hesitated and that says it all really. I'm so freaking excited. Ok tell me all about it."
"I'm not gonna gossip with you." Brendan's pages goes off so he stands up, a bit wobbly at first.
"Fine but ok ok answer me this."
"What?"
"Are you two together?"
Wednesday 5:50 PM
Cheryl is in Stes room when Brendan walks in. She gives him a minuscule smile but doesn't look delighted.
"You call me?" Brendan looks at Ste and can already see Ste blushing.
"Yeah time we move Ste over to the North Wing and start him up on his physical therapy. He's all good with the internal injuries so now we just need to get his muscles working again."
"Oh alright you want me to do that now?" Brendan waits for a response but Cheryl seems to be deep in thought. She keeps looking at Ste almost as if she's examining him for something. "Cheryl?"
"Huh what? Sorry yeah. You have a room ready for him?"
"Yeah pretty sure."
"Alright then he's all yours."
Ste smiles so hard his teeth almost blind the room and Cheryl takes notice.
"A bit happy there aren't you Ste?"
"Yep I can't wait to finally being able to move."
"Right I'm sure that's the reason." She gives her brother another look that he can't make out. "Ok Brendan you can take him. Oh and come back over here in an hour or so. I need to talk to you." Cheryl doesn't say goodbye to either of them and leaves the room.
"She's a little cranky huh."
"You say anything to her?"
"No she just came in and stood there in silence till you came."
"She's weird. Come on let's get you going then." Brendan gives him a chaste kiss on the lips before he puts him on the wheelchair. "You got everything?"
"Yeah didn't really have much." Ste leans his head back and pouts his lips. "One more?"
"You're impossible." Brendan tilts his head down and gives him an upside down kiss. It turns out it's pretty awkward to do. That and his cross keeps smacking Ste in the eye. "Sorry. I'll give you a better one when were over there."
He wheels him to the North Wing and gets him settled in. The rooms here are much larger than the West Wing. There are flowers, books, magazines, board games, the lot.
"No wonder people like it here more."
"How told you that?"
"No one. But it's like 100 times better over here."
"You do realize most of the time you're going to have to be doing exercises right."
"Naw I'm sure my physical therapist will go easy on me."
"I don't think he will."
Ste gives him a bubbly smile and gets back to looking around the room to get familiar with his new 'home.'
"So umm...I...I missed you."
At first Brendan doesn't know if that just came out of his mouth but after seeing Stes face he realizes it did.
"You what?"
"I'm not saying it again."
"Awww aren't you-"
"No no no don't say it."
"Adorable."
Brendan hits him with the pillow very softly and then tries covering Stes mouth when he busts out in laughter.
"You're gonna ruin everyone's eardrum with that laugh of yours."
"You love it."
"Not in my vocabulary mate."
"I'm not your mate."
"So what are you?"
Ste opens his mouth to answer but his phone goes off. The tables are a little farther than in his last room so he can't necessarily reach it. Brendan grabs it for him instead and is about to hand it over and when he sees the name on the screen.
"Oh look who it is."
Ste can already feel the mood change as Brendan sounds irritated now.
"Umm-"
"Adam. You know your little boyfriend from last time."
"He's not my boyfriend. You-"
"You going to tell him to fuck off or should I?"
Brendan places the phone on the bed next to Ste. It's that silence that they have grown used to as no one says anything. The phones ringtone is the only sound in the room. It finally stops ringing so Ste just puts it into his hand.
"You didn't answer me Steven."
"I don't know what you want me to do. There's nothing between me and him so there's no reason for me to even tell him anything."
"Give me your phone."
"No you're only going to go off on him and he hasn't done anything."
"Aww how fucking cute, you care about him. I can find his number you know that right."
Ste looks into his eyes and still sees its Brendan. He hasn't blacked out like last time. He still seems to be present.
"Can we drop this please? It's not worth it."
"I'm not worth it?"
"That's not what I meant! Stop making everything my fault!"
"All I'm asking for is your phone you're the one being a little bitch about it."
Ste throws the phone in Brendan's direction but he manages to dodge it. It crashes into the wall behind him and shatters.
"Fuck you Brendan. You owe me a new phone too."
"I'll get you a new phone when you leave this place until then you're not talking to anyone else. I never really liked sharing my possessions you know."
"Possession? I'm not a some sort of toy. Jesus how controlling are you seriously." Ste looks around to see if there's anything else he can throw at him.
"I can be worst. You really haven't even scratched the surface."
Ste is surprised when Brendan gives him an infatuated smile and his eyes also have this light in them. Their glistening and Ste can't look away.
"I gotta head over to the West Wing for a bit and check up on a patient but I'll be back."
Brendan leans down enough so that both of them are close to one another.
"Gissa kiss. No? You mad at me is that it."
"Just go."
"Fine." Brendan takes out his phone from his pocket and drops it next to Ste. "You can use my phone since till my shift is over. I'll see you in a bit." He exits the room and Ste watches him as he walks out.
Wednesday 6:30 PM
Ste lays down on his bed and turns on the tv to some reality show. He isn't paying much attention to it as he starts thinking about what's happening here. He knows he is in love with Brendan. Has been from the start. That love at first sight people talk about apparently is possible. He knows that now. Every time he sees Brendan his heart literally grows. It's this feeling that tells him he would be lost without him in his life. But there's a problem. It's a problem that has been subtly show and talked about to him since he has been here. Brendan Brady is mentally unstable. He hides it the best he can but there's moments when it shows. He's controlling, possessive, aggressive, vicious, forgetful, untrusting, and destructive. Most of all Brendan is a shattered soul. Broken. Lost. Sometimes when Ste watches him he sees a man that is barely holding it together. Trying desperately to crawl his way out of this dark hole that he's sinking further and further in.
He's so consumed in his thoughts he doesn't notice when someone walks in.
"Ste I think it's time we talked."
He's on you and you're struggling to push him off but you're far too weak. He almost chocked you to death and you still haven't been giving enough time to get your breath back. Seamus has his knee pressed down right on your stomach. He moves slightly so you are able to look behind him and you see your sister on the floor by the kitchen counter. She's not moving and you want to scream out to her. Just say anything so that she will wake up. Or just to tell her you love her before he takes your life. But you can't. Seamus has his hand pushed up against your mouth and you're powerless to yell. You move your legs and throw your arms trying to do something, anything.
"Stop moving you fucking worthless excuse of a son! You deserve everything you have ever gotten. Do you hear me? It disgusts me to have to look at you and call you my son. I should have killed you a long time ago."
"Get away from him."
You hear her weak voice coming from behind. She slowly gets up but has too grab onto the counter to keep her balance. Seamus slashes you with the knife across your collarbone before he gets up and charges toward her.
"NOOOOO! CHERYL!"
Her screams fill the entire room. It makes you forget about all the physical pain you're going through. Now the pain is just in your heart. You roll over and try crawling towards them as you see her fighting for her life. She's throwing punches harder than you ever thought possible. She hits him right in the face and tries running around him but he grabs her across the waist and flings her against the counter. Her head slams into the cabinet at such force that the cabinet door falls off the hinges. You hear her groan as her back collides onto the floor. After that she's silent.
"Chez..."
Seamus laughs at the sight of her and comes towards you again. He gives you a kick to the ribs that sends you rolling onto your back again. The belt comes off and he whips you all over your chest. You see blood flying through the air with every single hit. He drops back to his knees and pulls down his trousers.
"Get a last one out of you before I finish you."
He takes off your belt and then hastily pops the button on your jeans and un zips you. You close your eyes but there's a voice you hear that's telling you to open them. You listen and slowly open your eyes. Seamus is still on top of you and seems to be struggling with the zip as you hear him cursing. You don't understand what you're supposed to be looking for until you see it. Until you see her. You try focusing behind Seamus to see Cheryl struggling to move. She's alive. She refuses to stay down. There's blood around but she either doesn't notice or doesn't care as she places her hand right in it to try and lift herself up. You feel hands on your chest now. You're about to close your eyes so you don't have to see his face while he does this to you. Before you do though something catches your attention. A tiny sliver of light pierces the darkness and you see the blood-crusted razor sharp metal in Cheryl's hand.
BAM! Sorry this took me longer than usual but I felt blah about it. I hope you liked it. Review please?