AN: There's not a word that can sum up how truly thankful I am for all your wonderful reviews. I figured as a way to show my appreciation I would give you this chapter a couple days earlier, but first I have some notes...
1) This whole chapter is a flashback that happened 10 years ago.
2) Brendan is 16 and Cheryl is 20.
3) There will be like 2-3 parts that you'll think to yourself "I read this before didn't I?" Yes you have. The small little bits I have put into the previous chapters giving y'all hints about this day needed to be put into this one as well so that you would get the whole story.
Now on with the chapter =)
["It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone."]
10 Years Ago...
Heavy rain has been drenching the village all day long. When the students all began their classes the sky looked dark and black, signaling a storm was on its way. Within a couple minutes, rain started pouring down. It kept going on and on and on. Never stopping, not even for 5 minutes. Everyone found it strange that it was raining so much as usually they barely even see it. When classes ended the weather was still horrible.
Brendan hesitates by the doors as he watches the other students run into the rain and make a dash to their cars. The people walking home seem to think about their options first before they just shrug their shoulders and rush out.
"The day I decide to wear my new shoes is the day the world decides to flood itself." Pete crouches down and starts taking off his shoes.
"You're the dumbass that bought suede shoes. Who even wears those?"
"Jealousy doesn't suit you Bren."
"Fuck off bitch." Brendan kicks him and causes Pete to lose balance from his crouching position.
"That's real nice of you." He looks up at Brendan who is just leaning against the wall casually chewing gum. He's wearing a plain white shirt and black jeans. He has on a black jacket and has the hoodie pulled over him. Pete notices the familiar busted lip and black eye that he always seems to sport. He chooses not to ask Brendan about it because last time he did it ended badly.
"You gonna make a run for it? You can stay at my house till the rain calms down since your place is further." Pete gets back up putting his shoes into his bookbag.
"Naw my dad would probably kill me if I didn't go straight home."
Usually when people say that there's a tone of playfulness but Pete doesn't detect anything but a serious tone. That and he notices the cold stare in his eyes.
"Alright well I'll see you tomorrow then. Yeah?"
Brendan just nods as Pete runs out into the rain. It doesn't seem like it's going to calm down anytime soon so he's going to have to just get soaked. Just as he was about to step out he hears a loud booming voice nearby.
"Oi!"
Brendan fixes his gaze forward and sees his sister walking towards him with a neon pink umbrella shielding her from the rain.
"Need a lift little bro?" She gives him one of the warmest smiles imaginable to him.
"Yeah." Brendan simply says as he joins her under the umbrella. She casually puts her arm around his shoulder all the way till their back in her car.
Brendan pulls the hoodie off him and relaxes into the warm car seat. He faintly can feel Cheryl observing him but he doesn't say anything. After a couple minutes of silence Cheryl speaks up.
"What happened to your eye? It's swollen Bren. Your lip looks cut too."
"Oh it's nothing. Got into a small fight." He doesn't want to drag this topic any further so he changes the subject. "Why are you here anyway?"
"Oh yeah that's sweet of you. I mean if you want you can get out into the rain."
"That's not what I meant. It's just usually you don't get out of work this early."
"Yeah but they hired a new girl so I got to leave on time for once. I saw it was raining really bad and didn't want you catching a cold so just thought I would just swing by and give you a lift."
"Thanks."
She just winks at him and then turns on the radio to drown out the silence. It's a calm relaxing drive until Cheryl just blurts out something random.
"Oh oh!" She turns the radio down so Brendan is forced to listen to her. "So I was watching some show during work right and it was like one of those murder shows, you know the ones right?" Brendan barely gets a nod in before she continues. "Well some bloke was killed in his house and the autopsy people examined him and found he died from a stab wound. Apparently his jugular vein was cut."
Brendan just stares at her not really seeing that point in this story.
"No no I know what you're thinking. Why is she telling me this right? Well to kill a man all you have to do is cut their jugular vein. It's like an instant kill...well not instant but they die in minutes. It's a vital vein or something."
"Right. Thanks I guess. I'll keep it in mind for the next time I decide to kill someone Chez."
"Don't you dare. I'm just giving you extra knowledge into the human anatomy. You know I want to be a doctor so I just wanted to share. But hey if it ever comes down to saving yourself...always go for the jugular vein."
At the next red light Cheryl reaches over and shows Brendan where the vein would be located. They both end up laughing as they pretend to slash each other until the car behind them honks there horn. Brendan and Cheryl roll down the windows, ignoring the rain hitting their arms, and flick off the car behind them before they speed away.
["I thought about how there are two types of secrets: the kind you want to keep in, and the kind you don't dare to let out."]
Once their back in their dads flat they throw all their stuff on the floor. Cheryl plops down on the sofa as Brendan joins her after taking off his jacket.
"Bren grab the remote."
"Why didn't you tell me before I sat down?" He grunts as he gets back up again and ends up throwing the remote hitting his sister right in the face.
"Oww you dipstick that hurt!" She lunges at him and misses him by an inch. They spend about 10 minutes running around the flat until they both call a truce and watch tv.
The day carries on normally until Brendan's phone rings with a text from Seamus.
Brenda do something right for once and tell Cheryl to call me. Good boy.
He grips the phone so violently that he thinks he may break it. Brendan relays the message to Cheryl and she nonchalantly shrugs and goes to get her phone.
"Wonder what he wants. Be right back gonna call from my room." She goes into her room and closes the door.
Brendan barely registers her speaking so he decided not to try and strain himself into hearing what's been said. He lies down in the couch as he doesn't want to even do school work. He figures he will ask that Macca bloke to do it for him when he gets to school tomorrow morning. Brendan doesn't pay him anything or even thanks him but the kid always does it. Doesn't even hesitate. Brendan has an idea why but he refuses to entertain the thought. It's disgusting and wrong in his mind so he pushes it aside. Besides Macca looks like hell.
When Cheryl walks out she seems to be a little frustrated. More than a little. She slams her phone down on the kitchen counter and just stares ahead.
"What's up with you?"
"Just Da. Always wants this done. Or that done. And I always have to do it. Like he never ask you. Have you noticed that? He treats you...differently."
"No he doesn't." Brendan sits himself back up so he can actually look at her.
"Yeah he does. I'm second best to you."
"Oh shut up even I know that's a lie."
They both suddenly stop speaking and the house goes quiet except for the tv in the background. A few minutes go by and Cheryl has been stuck in the kitchen cleaning up.
Brendan gets up to help at one point but gets interrupted when his phone goes off.
"It's dad."
She rolls her eyes and keeps washing the dishes.
"Yeah-she's cleaning up I was about to help-why not-but it's a lot-I'm not, I just want to help-fine." He hangs up and goes back to the couch. "Sorry Chez he specifically told that I can't clean cause it's not right."
Cheryl sighs but doesn't say anything else for a while until she can't hold it much longer.
"How come you don't have to help with cleaning the house today? It's so unfair!"
"Da told me not to and besides you're older."
"Oh shut up I'm only 20. So why did Dad let you off the hook today then?"
"I don't know. He didn't tell me a reason on the phone."
"Do you know how lucky you are Bren. To be the apple of his eye. You're his favorite child. I know you are. Nothing I do will ever make him love me as much as you."
"Chez you're still his little girl. His princess. And if anyone is his favorite it's you."
"No I wish I was you."
"No believe me you don't want that."
"Why not? He loves you so much."
He don't know what happens next. It's been his and his dad's secret for 8 years. He has never messed up before, never slipped up. There have been times when he wanted to say something. Wanted to ask for help, but he kept it inside. At one point Brendan thought it would end. That he would stop doing it to him, but it didn't. Brendan thought that he was such a weak man, at least that's what Seamus made him believe. Brendan saw himself in the mirror and he hated himself. Thin, fragile, couldn't even defend himself. A failure is what he is. And the bruises and cuts all over his body remind him of that every day. A couple years ago the sexual abuse basically stopped, it only happened rarely now. The physical and mental abuse still continued. He wasn't quite strong enough to take him on so he dealt with the pain. Every day Brendan wanted to just run away but he had nowhere to go and he wasn't going to leave Cheryl by herself with this monster. But today is different, today he slips up. This one decision will torment his life for many years to come.
"He loved me a little too much. In his own special way." Brendan realizes what he said and he hopes maybe she didn't hear him. Once he meets her eyes he realizes she heard it perfectly. His sister has always been smart, the smartest girl in school. But she was so naive. She never saw the bad in anyone until it was shoved right in front of her face. Brendan can see her mind racing. She shakes her head and walks over to him.
"What do you mean?"
Brendan doesn't know if he should tell her but he already can tell she's made an assumption. He tries getting out of it by admitting the physical abuse. The punches.
"Bren that doesn't show love though. What do you mean?" She slowly says the last words and she's looking at him so deeply as if she's pleading with her eyes to tell her the truth.
"I just told you. He beat me Chez ok. That's it. I wasn't thinking and used the wrong word." Brendan tries to laugh but it comes out sounding forced. That's when he sees it. Her eyes change into realization. Every single thing in the past that she overlooked comes straight to the front. Every time he flinched when his dad touched his shoulder and she asked what that was for. Every time he touched his lower back and he jumped forward and she laughed at him for being jumpy. Every time he would smile at him and he would excuse himself to his room and she would say he was being mean to Da. All those thoughts hit her and Brendan sees her eyes widen. This is the day he will remember as the day when he witnessed his sisters heart shatter. A single tear escapes her eyes as she crouches down.
"Brendan. Look at me. You know you can trust me. You know I'll always be here for you. I need to know-" she hesitates as she looks down and catches her breath "has...has he ever...touc... did he ra-" she can't say it. Brendan knows it's not because she doesn't believe him but it's because she's failed him.
"Yes." That's all he says. The next thing he hears is his sister's scream echo throughout the house.
["The smile upon your face doesn't hide the sadness within your eyes."]
She keeps screaming and screaming till her lungs have no more air to give. Then it becomes a very soft muffled cry. She's still on the floor crouched down with her head resting on the flooring. Cheryl slams her fist over and over again against the tile until her whole hand becomes red.
"Chez just...look at me." Brendan reaches out and lifts her chin up with his finger. She refuses to make eye contact until Brendan forces her head even higher.
"Chez..." It breaks his heart when he finally sees her eyes. Their bloodshot red but that's not what gets him. He can see through her and he sees the broken little girl with eyes that are asking for forgiveness. Her eyes show the guilt, sadness, anger, disgust, and the words she can't speak out loud. Brendan moves further to the edge of the sofa and tries to pull her into a hug but she nods frantically and pushes herself off the floor. She runs to the bathroom and then a couple seconds later Brendan hears her throwing up. He gets up and follows her path and watches as she pukes her guts out. She's gasping and sobbing and she can't stop. Her bile eventually is just water and Brendan has to literally tell her to stop and pull her away from the toilet.
"You ok?" Brendan rubs at her back as she tries stabilizing her breathing.
She pulls away and then turns around and grabs him. She hugs him so right Brendan struggles to breathe.
"I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. Sorry. I'm sorry." She keeps repeating the same thing and every time her grip increases. "Brendan I'm sorry."
"It's ok...I can't breathe."
She pulls away as if she's been burned. "Sorry. Sorry."
"Stop apologizing."
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."
"Why you sorry? You have nothing to be sorry for."
"For not seeing it. For not...for not seeing what he's done to you. Why didn't I see it?"
"I didn't want you to see it."
"I'm your sister, why didn't you tell me?"
"Cause..cause I love you."
Cheryl drops her head and tears start falling to the floor. Brendan reaches out and tries wiping away some of them from her cheeks. She looks up towards him and gives him a broken smile.
"If I told you, then everything you believed in and everything you cared for, everything would just...just come crashing down. How could I do that to my sister?"
She clears her throat for the next question knowing it's going to shatter her whole childhood. "When?"
"It doesn't matter."
"Was I there? Was I in the house?" She can barely get these questions out as more and more of her keeps breaking into pieces. She sees her little brother being stronger than she could ever be. When he doesn't respond, she gets her answer. "I was wasn't I?"
"Not all the times." His voice cracks as he starts remembering all the times she was in the house. When he was forced to keep quiet or she would hear. And if she heard and came in and saw what was happening, her whole life would be ruined. So he did everything he could think of to keep himself from screaming. He would bite on his lips so hard till he could taste his own blood in his mouth.
"I was in the next bedroom to you."
"Please don't do this. Please."
"I was jealous can you believe that? I was jealous when I used to see him playing with you. I wanted to be you so badly. I wanted to be daddy's favorite."
"If he was with me it meant he wasn't with you."
"Oh!" Cheryl pushes away from him and throws up once again. She slowly gets up and balances on the sink as she washes her mouth. The second she even moves one hand away her whole body collapses beneath her. She crawls over back to Brendan and sits in front of him. Both their knees touching.
"So I didn't run away."
Cheryl can't stop crying. Her tears are now burning her eyes. "At nanas there was this one summer when me and you were there, I remember. And you were so happy you had this big stupid grin on your face all the time."
She looks at him for a second and she sees him smile at her.
"...and then he arrived. It was meant to be a surprise. I was happy...but you...you stopped smiling."
Brendan releases a breath and Cheryl reaches out to him. He grabs her hand and pulls her to wrap her in his arms as she sobs into his chest.
["I guess what scares me the most now is the thought that I won't be able to protect you"]
After about an hour of sitting on the bathroom floor, they both got up and went to the living room. Cheryl turned the tv off and sat on the floor.
"So what do we do now?" She pats the space next to her motioning for Brendan to come sit down.
"Don't know." Brendan takes the seat next to her and they both just stare at the wall.
"Go pack your stuff up."
Brendan doesn't understand what she's talking about so he just gives her a very confused look.
"Brendan go pack a bag. We're leaving."
"What? Where? We don't even have any money."
"I have some money saved up. We'll get a hotel room for a week till I figure out a permanent place for us to stay at."
"Chez no. You're saving that up for medical school."
"I don't care about school Brendan!" She doesn't mean to shout at him but she's completely in another frame of mind. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to yell. But please just go pack. We need to get out of here before he comes back." She gets up and grabs his arm to pull him to his feet. She practically pushes him to his room and throws a bag on his bed. "Fit whatever you can in there. I'm gonna go get some of my stuff."
She leaves him to it as he starts throwing clothes and other small possessions into the bag. He vaguely hears his sister also moving things in her room. He stuffs as much as he can before he picks up the bag and drops it in the living room. Cheryl comes out a minute later with a suitcase.
"I got some of your paperwork in here too for when I apply to be your guardian. You have what you need?"
"Think so."
Cheryl grabs his bag for him but stops when Brendan seems to remember something.
"Wait wait I forgot my ring."
"What?"
"My ring mum gave me. Give me one second."
Cheryl gives him one of her 'you're so forgetful' smiles and waves her hand at him letting him know to hurry.
He rushes into his room and has to remember exactly where he put it. He doesn't wear it often as it doesn't entirely fit. Some days it fits fine and others it seems to almost fall off his finger. He opens a drawer and moves things around trying to find it.
"Brendan come on!"
"I can't find it! Hold on."
He keeps going through drawers throwing different items all over his room. He hears a door close and thinks Cheryl maybe went to put their bags into the car. After a minute he realizes he never heard the door open again so it couldn't have been Cheryl walking out. It had to be someone coming inside. He freezes. There's only one other person that has a key to the house. Seamus.
He slowly walks over to his door and places his ear against it. There is no voices been heard but he hears footsteps.
"What are these suitcases doing here?"
"Oh wanted to take Brendan on a sibling road trip. Thought it would be nice."
Brendan can easily hear the coldness in her face and hopes Seamus can't see it in her eyes.
"Really?"
The sound of a zipper opening alerts Brendan that he's checking the contents of their bags.
"So why do you have all of Brendan's records in here. Too many things in here for a small road trip."
"Didn't say it was a small road trip did I Seamus?" Her tone is now completely riddled with anger. "Now if you don't mind I'm taking him."
Brendan is about to open the door when he hears Cheryl again.
"Don't you dare go into his room."
"Why not? He's my son."
"That's fucking rich coming from you."
The footsteps approach and his door opens up. Seamus walks in and spots Brendan. His room is a mess and it must click in Seamus mind that this wasn't a road trip. It's an escape. He walks towards Brendan and gently touches his arm until Cheryl slaps his hand off of him.
"DON'T YOU EVER TOUCH HIM!"
"Cheryl sweetheart what's wrong?"
"What's wrong? Really?"
Brendan silently pulls on her sleeve trying to get her to calm down but it's no use she's livid. And judging by his father's eyes, Brendan knows he has figured out their secret is out.
"You're a sick human being. I'm ashamed to have you as my father. You don't deserve having him as a son. He's so much better than you'll ever be. Now I'm taking him away from you so you'll never hurt him again. Don't you try getting in contact with him or I will kill you myself."
She grabs Brendan's hand and walks out of his room, both of them feeling Seamus eyes on them.
"Grab your bag we have to go now." Cheryl whispers to him and Brendan detects fear in her voice.
"You couldn't keep your mouth shut could you Brenda." Seamus walks right up to them but only stares at Brendan. "That pretty little mouth of yours just had to open huh. I told you those lips are only meant to suck my cock not to talk you little bitch."
Cheryl slaps him right across the face. "SHUT THE FUCK UP! YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO TALK TO HIM LIKE THAT! You raped him Da, why? Why? He's your son. I don't understand."
"I couldn't stop Cheryl. I had to show him...show him what being a fag would be like. He needed to learn that taking it up the ass was disgusting. It's not right. I just...I needed to show him."
"By raping him. That's sick. You're sick. You're dead to me. Come on Brendan lets go."
"Who said you could leave?"
"I did. He's not your responsibility anymore. Don't worry Seamus I'll do what you couldn't."
As soon as she takes a step Seamus lunges at Brendan punching him straight in the face. Brendan stumbles a bit but regains his balance and throws a punch of his own. It's an all-out fight after that. Both Seamus and Brendan are punching and kicking each one of them trying to get the heads up. Cheryl jumps in and starts punching Seamus in the back.
"YOU TWO ARE WORTHLESS PIECES OF SHIT!"
"SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!" Brendan screams and releases the voice from all the times he stayed silent. All the times he was forced to stay still. All the secrets he was undoubtedly told to keep to himself. "I HATE YOU!"
Seamus swings back and his elbow collides with Cheryl sending her to the floor. She lets out a small groan but stands back up and continues fighting. Seamus ends up hitting Brendan in the throat completely knocks the air out of him. He knows it's a weakness of Brendan's. The amount of times he has been hit in the throat has ruined his trachea and windpipe. With the small bit of leverage Seamus turns around and punches Cheryl repeatedly. She falls to the floor and covers her face as the onslaught of punches come her way. She gets dragged across the floor into the kitchen. Seamus kicks her in her ribs and then stops when he sees Brendan regaining his strength. He moves away from her but feels a hand grab his ankle.
"No please...leave him alone. Hurt me. Let him go. Please."
He smiles down at her before he slams his shoe right onto her face sending her head slamming into the tile. She's not unconscious but her vision starts fading.
"No...no please..."
She still begs as she sees Seamus go towards Brendan.
"Get up queer boy." Seamus lifts him up enough so he's staring at him.
"I'm sorry. Let her go."
"Let who go?"
"Cheryl. She won't say anything. I'll stay with you."
"To late Brenda." He slams Brendan against the wall slamming his head in the process. It disorients Brendan's mind for a second before he gets brought back into reality as Seamus knees him in the stomach. He leans forward from the hit only to be kneed in the face. Seamus lets him fall to the floor. Then he laughs. A loud laugh fills the room as his children groan in pain below him. He crouches down next to Brendan and shoves his shoulders down onto the ground before he straddles him.
He's on Brendan as he struggles to push Seamus off but he's far too weak. Seamus has his knee pressed down right on his stomach. He moves slightly so that he can look behind him and he sees his sister on the floor by the kitchen counter. She's not moving and Brendan wants to scream out to her. Just say anything so that she will wake up. Or just to tell her he loves her before his life is taken away from him. But he can't. Seamus has his hand pushed up against his mouth and he's powerless to yell. Brendan moves his legs and throws his arms trying to do something, anything.
"Stop moving you fucking worthless excuse of a son! You deserve everything you have ever gotten. Do you hear me? It disgusts me to have to look at you and call you my son. I should have killed you a long time ago."
"Get away from him."
Brendan hears her weak voice coming from behind. She slowly gets up but has too grab onto the counter to keep her balance. Seamus slashes Brendan with a knife he always carries with him. The slash goes across his collarbone. Then he gets up and charges toward her.
"NOOOOO! CHERYL!" Brendan yells trying to get Seamus to come back to him. It doesn't work.
Her scream fills the entire room. It makes Brendan forget about all the physical pain he's going through. Now the pain is just in his heart. He rolls over and tries crawling towards them as he sees her fighting for her life. She's throwing punches harder than he ever thought possible. She hits him right in the face and tries running around him but he grabs her across the waist and flings her against the counter. Her head slams into the cabinet at such force that the cabinet door falls off the hinges. Brendan hears her groan as her back collides onto the floor. After that she's silent.
"Chez..."
Seamus laughs at the sight of her and comes towards Brendan again. He gives him a kick to the ribs that sends him rolling onto his back again. The belt comes off and he whips him all over his chest. The blood starts flying through the air with every single hit. He drops back to his knees and pulls down his trousers.
"Get a last one out of you before I finish you."
He takes off Brendan's belt and then hastily pops the button on his jeans and un zips him. Brendan closes his eyes but there's a voice he hears that's telling him to open them. Brendan slowly opens his eyes. Seamus is still on top of him and seems to be struggling with the zip. He doesn't understand what his supposed to be looking for. Until he sees her. Cheryl is struggling to move. She's alive. She refuses to stay down. There's a small amount of blood around her but she either doesn't notice or doesn't care as she places her hand right in it to try and lift herself up. Seamus hands moves to Brendan's chest. Brendan is about to close his eyes so he doesn't have to see his face while he rapes him again. Before he closes his eyes though something catches his attention. A tiny sliver of light pierces the darkness and he sees the blood-crusted razor sharp metal in Cheryl's hand.
Brendan's eyes widen as he makes eye contact with Cheryl. He starts pleading for her to just drop the knife and run. Leave him. But she nods no and keeps moving forward, knife in hand. When she is close enough she moves her hand upwards and then slams it downwards into Seamus arm. Her coordination is off as her head is pounding from the constant beating before so she only ends up stabbing the side of it. It's enough for Seamus to scream and get off Brendan. Both Brendan and Cheryl see absolute rage in their fathers' eyes and at this point they know they're not making it out alive. Seamus erupts and throws Cheryl across the room. She slams into the table so hard it breaks from the force. Brendan gets up and tackles him to the floor and starts punching him with anything he has left. He gets distracted when he sees that a shard of glass has impaled Cheryl in the leg and she's crying in agony. Seamus gets the upper hand as he punches him and rolls him over.
"You two are really starting to irritate me. I was thinking just maybe I would let her go but the whore refused to leave you. So for that neither one of you is getting out of here." Seamus smiles at Brendan before he plants his lips on him. "Open your mouth Brenda. Your precious sister will see how much you enjoy a dick going into you."
"No no Da. Please. She can't see...it'll ruin her...please. I'm begging you."
"You're so useless Brendan. Nothing about you is special. You know what you are? You're a waste of space in this world. I got a gay boy as my son. You disgust me. Truly you do. I'm so disappointed in you. You just had to do one thing...keep quiet. But you couldn't even do that. Now you ruined your life and your sisters. It's your fault Brendan. Her death will be on your hands. But look at it this way you can finally see your dead mother again. No wait you can't. Because you're not going where she is. Faggots like you don't deserve to go there. You're gonna be in hell as you mum laughs at her pitiful son."
Seamus kisses him again as he slips his tongue inside his mouth. He finally gets the zip open on Brendan's jeans and in one motion pulls his jeans and boxers down past his knees. Seamus pulls his pants down as he flips Brendan over and forces him to look at Cheryl. Brendan tries facing away but Seamus holds his head in that position.
"DON'T! PLEASE DAD DON'T DO IT TO HIM AGAIN!" Cheryl is screaming and pleading as she tries moving but her leg is in agony. She collapses the second she tries standing. Her eyes make contact with Brendan and she mouths "I'm so sorry."
Brendan whispers back "It's ok."
Seamus doesn't even prepare him or even put a condom on as he pushes straight into him. Brendan cries out in pain as his body reacts violently at the intrusion.
"NOOO! STOP!" Cheryl is crying so hard her voice sounds so pained.
Seamus thrust into him over and over causing Brendan to yell every so often. He tries to helplessly grab onto anything as the pain is unreal. It hurts so much. He screams as Seamus grabs his hips and pulls Brendan into his thrusts. Brendan mistakenly glances toward Cheryl and sees tears just pouring out of her. She's pulling herself across the broken glass not caring if she's cutting herself open. She looks completely broken.
"Chez...chez stop...you're...glass...stop." He can barely form coherent sentences as Seamus keeps pounding into him. A few seconds later he feels liquid inside him as he realizes Seamus just came in him. He breathes again and thinks maybe it's over. Maybe he will just let them go. Seamus pulls himself out of him and gets his pants back on. Brendan hastily pulls up his jeans. He looks down and there's blood dripping through his jeans. Seamus was apparently to rough and completely tore him open.
Brendan tries standing but his legs give out of him. Seamus leaves for a second. "Fuck. Sis stay there. You're cutting yourself open."
"Bren...are you ok? I'm so sorry."
"I'm fine. Just don't move." Brendan starts crawling towards her and when he gets in arms distance Cheryl grabs him and cries into his shoulder. "Come on we have to get out now."
They both struggle and realize that they can't even stand. They start crawling slowly to the door but before they even come close Seamus has them by the ankles pulling them back. He has his belt off as he whips Cheryl across her chest and pushes her out of the way before he goes back to Brendan. He wraps the belt around his neck and tugs on it. Brendan's vision becomes cloudy and he can't breathe. Everything around him starts to fade as darkness fills his sight. He becomes unconscious but wakes back up. He doesn't know how long he has been out for but he figured it couldn't have been that long. When he opens his eyes he sees Cheryl on Seamus back stabbing away at him. Over and over. From the loss of blood Seamus topples over and he crawls to the kitchen to try and patch himself up. Cheryl sees her moment and grabs Brendan by the hand and literally pulls him across the floor knowing he barely has enough life in him to breath. She fumbles with the door handle but gets it open.
"Listen to me Brendan. He will come after us if we both run out of here and neither one of us will make it far before he gets us."
Brendan knows what she is about to do. "No I'm not leaving you."
"You don't have a choice. You have done everything to keep me safe. I failed you as a sister and I'm so sorry. I want you to go ok. Run away and never look back. I love you so so much. You're the best brother I could have ever wished for. Please forgive me."
She pushes him out of the door and shuts it closed before he can register that she didn't come out with him. He painfully reaches up to grab the handle but it's locked.
"CHERYL! OPEN THE DOOR!"
He hears a huge force slam against the door. He finally cries at that second as he knows its Cheryl's body. She's just sacrificed her life to save his. "CHEZ...SIS! PLEASE!" His windpipe is ruined and the more he screams the harder it is to breathe. Within moments he becomes unconscious.
["My father told me once that the most important thing every man should know is what he would die for."]
Brendan suddenly wakes up and he springs up to his feet only to get a sharp pain shoot through his body. He leans against the door as he waits for the pain to leave. It doesn't so he just accepts it and looks around to get his bearings together. He's on the porch of his house and there's blood on it. There's blood on him. He tries the door and it's still locked. He limps around the house and makes it to the back door and surprisingly it's open. He walks inside and it looks as if a tornado just went through the house. Everything is broken. There's holes in the walls. Blood is splattered all over the place.
"Cheryl?" He waits but hears nothing. "Sis are you here?"
He doesn't know what to do next. He slides down the wall and starts to cry until he spots a white piece of paper in the middle of the floor. He brushes away his tears and grabs the note.
Brenda you still have a chance to save her. Your choice. Either walk away or come find her.
He puts the note in his pocket and walks out the back door. He has no idea where he is going but he just keeps walking till he sees a giant field in the distance so he picks up his speed and keeps heading in that direction. Brendan finally gets to the beginning of the field and sees a small pathway so he follows it.
It's dark out as he walks this paved walkway. His heart is racing as he looks around for any signs of her. A bit farther down the path on the ground are small blood droplets. They appear to make a trail so he follows it. A mantra of "Please be ok. Please be ok. Please be ok" repeats over and over in his mind. To this day Brendan never believed in god but at this moment in time he finds himself praying and asking him for help. The walkway ends and turns into this gravel road. It's uneven and he trips every couple of steps. The farther he goes the less he sees of the blood trail. It starts becoming more and sparser till it completely stops. Brendan finally peels his eyes from the ground and takes a look at the surroundings. He's in the middle of nowhere. The trees are dull with no leaves on them. A bunch of dead flowers are scattered around the field. Small dead animals are lined along the side. It's as if any sign of life here has gone. He looks in every direction to see where to go and he finds himself being drawn to keep going straight. His feet move on their own as if he isn't even in control of his body anymore. After what feels like hours to him, knowing it's only a few minutes, he walks into another field with grass so high he can barely see over it. All the way at the other side of this field is an old abandoned shack like house. Brendan strains his eyes to make out a silhouette right by the door. Many people wouldn't be able to tell who it is but he knows right away. He can tell by the way it walks, the way it presents itself. A figure that has haunted him his whole life. That's when it dawns on Brendan that he didn't bring anything. No gun or knife. He looks back and there's no way he would be able to find this place again so he keeps moving forward. He knows she's there and terrified for her life, she's in his head telling him to run the other way. To escape. That it's ok to leave her. That she's sorry. Brendan ignores her. She always did say he was stubborn. Adrenaline kicks in and his running now. Brendan knows he's running into his own demise and he think to himself that's ok. It's his time to go. He's ready to take that final hit for her.
["We all didn't come into the world at the same time so it makes sense that we don't leave it at the same time."]
Seamus had told Brendan when he first moved into this house that there was a massive field a couple yards from the house. He said there was a forest and large crops. Miles upon miles of greenery. Turns out he wasn't lying. He has been walking for what feels like ages and he still hasn't reached the shack. The fact that he can barely breathe isn't helping either. He can still feel the hands crushing his throat and he's struggling to breathe properly. He can only imagine how red his neck must look. There's blood all over him. His face, neck, arms, shirt, and jeans. Brendan can't tell whose blood is whose. He can see Cheryl's and Seamus blood splattered all over him. He thinks to himself that he will never wear these clothes again, that is if he even gets to see tomorrow. After what feels like forever he thinks he is finally within distance of the old abandoned shack.
A couple of steps down the road Brendan trips on some of the uneven gravel and lands face first on the ground. When he opens his eyes he sees a pink hair bow. There's blood on the very tips of it. He lifts himself up and grabs it. Brendan sticks it in his pocket and hopes it gives him some sort of strength. And if it doesn't at least when he dies he will have something to remind him that his sister was there with him. Till the end.
["Childhood should be carefree, playing in the sun; not living a nightmare in the darkness of the soul."]
"Unbelievable." Brendan mutters as he trips for the millionth time. He gets back up again and hears his joints crack. Their stiff and this long walk is draining any last amount of strength he has. He looks back for a second and sees his own blood trailing him. There's just grass behind him, nothing else. He sighs and continues to move. Eventually he has to stop as he is having more and more trouble breathing. Brendan gets on his knees and looks towards the sky.
"I know I never done this before and I know I don't deserve your help. But I'm begging you for it. She's my life. I don't think I could go on without her. Take me instead. She still has so much to give and she still has love inside her. I don't. Not anymore. I'm asking you to hear me for once in my life. Please...just save her."
He struggles even more to get back up. "Thanks God I can't even pray without my knees buckling."
Brendan walks for a few minutes and he finally sees the shack mere inches away from him. Seamus is right by the door when he spots him and then walks inside. Brendan takes a deep breath before he opens the door and steps in.
He doesn't expect what he sees. Cheryl is all bloody and tied to the old decaying staircases. Seamus is sitting on the first step just smiling at him. When Cheryl catches his eyes hers widen. She mouths "Please just run."
Brendan's nods to say no and looks over at Seamus as he stands up.
"Brenda I figured you would come." Seamus steps forward and for a second Brendan thinks he's too tired to do anything. But before he has time to blink Seamus is already on top of him punching him everywhere he can get his hands on. Brendan fights back and the anger in him gives him a little bit of energy. He connects with Seamus nose and sees blood start pouring. He punches him over and over in the mouth till Seamus teeth start cracking and falling. He slams his fist straight in his eyes and Seamus yells in pain. Brendan lifts himself up and starts kicking but Seamus is able to grab his leg and drop him to the floor. His head cracks on the floor and Brendan knows he probably has a concussion as he feels blood pooling on his head. Seamus begins his assault on him with kick after kick to his ribs and chest. He takes his belt off and whips his back repeatedly. He then whips him across the face ripping some of his flesh off. The steel buckle hits him in the left eye and gets stuck in it. He cries out in pain as he pulls it out himself. Now tears of blood start falling from his eyes. His vision is completely gone from his left eye and now his only working with his right eye.
Seamus drags him closer to his sister and Brendan reaches out and is able to touch her foot. She's pulling against the ropes making her wrists bleed.
"You up for one more Brenda."
Brendan shakes his head and says no. He can't. His whole body is in excruciating pain. He can't even breathe properly at this point. He has to breathe through his mouth and every breath is like a punch to his lungs. Seamus pulls Brendan's jeans off again and then takes his own off.
"DON'T FUCKING TOUCH HIM!" Cheryl screams and starts pulling violently.
"SHUT UP BITCH!" Seamus backhands her and goes back and straddles Brendan. "Now you're going to look at me as I put my dick in you. And you will tell me you enjoy it. Do you understand?" Brendan doesn't respond and gets punched in the face.
Seamus lines himself up and pushes in him for the second time that day. Cheryl starts screaming as Brendan groans in pain. His hand is still holding onto her foot. She can't do anything at this point; she can't even look away as Seamus has tied her neck so tight she can't move her head. She moves her other foot and joins both of them together to wrap Brendan's hand in between. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry." She closes her eyes when she feels Brendan's grip tighten. He releases his grip and Cheryl's eyes spring open thinking Brendan has passed out. She panics but Brendan's face his facing away from her. "BRENDANNNNN! DON'T LEAVE ME!"
He turns his head to look at her and quietly says "I'm not leaving" before he gives her a smile and turns away. She watches as Seamus keeps pushing himself into her brother and she throws up all over herself. She tries closing her eyes when she sees white liquid shooting out of Seamus. She looks away and throws up once again but feels Brendan's hand grip her foot as it happens.
"Good boy. Now say it."
"No."
Punch.
"Say it."
"No."
Slap.
"Now Brenda."
"Fuck you."
Punch. Punch. Punch.
"Brendan don't make me have to force you because it won't end well."
"FUCK. YOU. I. WISH. YOU. WERE. DEAD."
Seamus drags him to the middle of the room and pulls out a knife. "Last chance."
Brendan spits and it hits him right in the face. Seamus chuckles and spits back at him before he leans down and yanks Brendan's shirt off. He starts stabbing him all over the chest.
"BRENDANNNN! NOOOOOO! GET OFF HIM!"
The pain is too much and Brendan loses consciousness a couple of times but eventually stays awake. He looks at the amount of blood all over him before he feels the most heart stopping pain he has ever in his life experienced. Seamus has impaled the knife right above his elbow and is dragging it down his left arm. The blood is spewing out of it. The veins are bursting below the skin. The flesh is burning around the cut. The knife keeps digging into his skin. Brendan can't even see his arm anymore as the blood has completely covered it. Seamus pulls it rapidly all the way to his ring finger and then he goes back to the beginning of the scar and drags it down again.
Brendan can feel the life going out of him. He's suffocating and the pain is so intense he rather be dead.
The next thing he feels is the knife on his right forearm. The knife enters him and gets dragged all the way up his shoulders. Seamus rolls him over and continues the path.
"Whenever anyone sees you for who you are they will know you belong to me. Your mine Brenda. You will always be mine. This scar here is a reminder of who owns your life. I do. I've branded you forever. You'll never forget me."
Towards the end of the scar he makes an 'S' shape making sure he brands Brendan with his initial. He finishes marking him and then starts stabbing him in the back.
"SAY IT BOY!"
"I LIKE WHEN YOU DO THIS TO ME!"
"You're sick Brendan. You enjoy getting raped. Your mother would be so ashamed to have you as a son."
Seamus lifts the knife again and slashes at Brendan's neck. Brendan doesn't have much time left and he closes his eyes until he hears something in the background.
"I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!" Cheryl literally jumps on Seamus knocking him off of Brendan. Brendan blinks a couple times and looks over to the staircases. The pole she was tied to is broken right in half. The ropes are still around her neck and arms. Blood is oozing from her neck and wrists but she doesn't let up. She's on top of Seamus slamming his head into the ground. Her fake nails all break as she puts them in his eye sockets. She digs her finger into his eyes and twist them.
"SICK PIECE OF SHIT! YOU'RE NEVER GOING TO HURT HIM AGAIN! EVER! I'LL FUCKING BURN YOU TILL YOU TURN TO ASHES YOU WORTHLESS ANIMAL!"
Brendan is speechless as he sees her. She's raging and he can hear bones cracking. He knows some are her own bones but she's going on pure adrenaline because she doesn't stop. Seamus somehow manages to grip her throat and she hesitates for a second. He grabs the knife next to him and stabs her across the collarbone sending her backwards.
She puts her hand over it and applies pressure to it.
"That's it I'm sick of the both of you! Let's just end this now." Seamus crawls to a corner of the room and pulls out a gun from a bag. "I'll be nice and give you a last chance to say goodbye to each other."
Cheryl looks over at her brother who clearly doesn't even have much time left. The pool of blood around him shows that. His eyes are losing the light in them.
"Brendan look at me please." She waits till he looks at her in the eyes. "I'm sorry. You never deserved that. You did absolutely nothing wrong to deserve what he did to you. You're perfect in my eyes Brendan. I don't care what he has told you and what he has made you believe but you're none of those things. You're amazing and anyone would be blessed to have you in their lives. I love you Bren. My brother and my best friend. And I will see you again."
She reaches out to him and runs her hand over his bloody arm. He smiles at her before he starts.
"Don't ever think you need to apologize to me. You have never let me down sis. Everyone else gave up on me except you. You always saw the good in me and no matter what I did you were there. You listened and you protected me. I would give up my entire life just too give you a second more to yours. I love you Chez. Forever."
Seamus stares at them before he speaks. "That was so beautiful. I could cry." He laughs once again. "Now which one of you wants to go first?"
Cheryl lifts herself up enough to indicate she's going first. She smiles one more time to Brendan and lets Seamus pull her away from him. Their backs are facing Brendan so he silently pulls himself up. The very last ounce of life he has in him will be used to save her. He picks up the knife and quietly sneaks up behind him.
Seamus lifts the gun up and points it at Cheryl. The next second the gun is on the floor as Brendan has stabbed the knife right in the center of his back. Seamus drops to his knees and Brendan removes the knife. Then in one motion he cuts him across the neck right on the jugular vein. Blood shots out of his neck as Seamus drops to the floor. Brendan grabs Cheryl away from the body next to her. She lifts herself and holds Brendan up as she knows he's about to fall. They try walking away but Brendan can't stay up much longer.
"Come on Brendan please just stay with me. We're almost there."
They both stop in their tracks when they hear something behind them. They turn around and see Seamus on the floor putting the gun directly at Cheryl.
He pulls the trigger.
Cheryl falls to the ground but realizes she hasn't been shot. She looks over and sees Brendan on the floor. He pushed her out of the way and took the bullet for her directly.
She turns her gaze towards Seamus who seems to still be alive but slowly dying. He's on the floor barely holding onto the gun. His eyes already look dead. She reacts and pushes herself off the ground. She runs toward Seamus and pulls the gun right out of his hand. She looks at him one more time as she sees him fading away.
She pulls the trigger shooting him right in the chest. She shoots again and again till the gun is out of bullets. She drops the gun and rushes back over to Brendan.
"Bren...Brendan...please stay with me." She pulls him up to her lap and moves the hair away from his eyes. "You can't leave me. Not now. Please you have to fight. I promise we will be ok Brendan. You saved me. I'm safe Brendan. I'll always be here. Till the end remember? We said we would always be there till the end together. And this isn't the end. It can't be. You have so much more life in you. Please. Don't leave me."
She looks at him as his eyes struggle to stay open. The small bit of light in them start fading away. His blood is dripping onto her and she holds his hand. Brendan looks up at her and smiles at her.
"I love you Cheryl. Never forget that."
"No don't you dare say goodbye to me. I'll get help you just have to stay with me a little bit longer. Please. I saw Seamus phone here. I'll go find it and get help ok."
"Chez...I'm so sorry...I can't..."
"Yes you can. You can! Don't close your eyes! I love you Brendan. You have to stay here."
"Bye sis..."
She feels his body go limp for a second. "Bren? No no no no no no no! BRENDAN! WAKE UPPPP! BRENDANNNNNNNN!"
["The thing about hearts is that they always want to keep beating"]
Cheryl sits in the same chair she has been sitting in for over 2 weeks. She never takes her eyes off of him. Every time she hears the machine stop beating her heart stops until she hears the beep again.
Both Cheryl and Brendan were rushed to the hospital over 2 weeks ago after Cheryl found Seamus cell phone and dialed for an ambulance. Surprisingly they were able to find the abandoned shack easily. From the time she called it only took them about 5 minutes to get to them. She still remembers the look on their faces as they walked in. It was a bloodbath in that house. It covered the floor and the walls and them. Seamus lay on the floor, dead, with multiple bullet shots to the chest. Cheryl was bleeding from the collarbone and her face was so swollen it was unrecognizable. In her lap lay Brendan, still breathing but barely alive. His whole body was covered in blood. He had stab wounds all over his upper body, two massive wounds on his left and right arm, and a bullet shot in his chest. The ambulance clearly saw Seamus was a hopeless cause as they could see he was dead so they rushed towards Brendan who was barely hanging on. Cheryl repeatedly told them she was fine and to just focus on her brother. She refused treatment until she got to the hospital making sure everyone that was in the ambulance was only helping Brendan.
For the most part she didn't have any serious injuries. She had a few broken bones, internal bleeding, and a concussion. The doctor told her that the cut on her collarbone would eventually turn into a scar that wouldn't fade. When she was given the ok to move around she went straight to her brothers' room. He was in the intensive care unit hooked up to machines. Those machines were keeping him alive. He couldn't even breathe for himself and he still hasn't woken up. She never left even as she saw the cops pacing outside their room. She knew eventually they would ask what truly happened and she honestly didn't know what to tell them. She shot Seamus repeatedly and she assumes the police will see that as murder instead of self-defense but she had to do it. She knows Brendan may have killed Seamus, but she shot him and took his life before the knife did.
She looks at her brother and watches as the machines breath for him. She doesn't even notice when the doctor walks in.
"Cheryl Brady?"
"Yes?" She doesn't look away from her brother.
"I wanted to talk to you about his condition."
She nods and finally makes eye contact with the doctor.
"Obviously we're still waiting for him to wake up but besides that he has a lot of serious injuries I need to discuss with you. He has a broken arm and leg and almost all his ribs are broken. We were able to stop the internal bleeding but we had to do a blood transfusion as he lost gallons of blood. He has a collapsed lung and his trachea in his neck is injured. Meaning breathing for him will be greatly impaired if we do not do surgery on it. His left eye has lost some vision in it but we won't know how bad it is till he wakes up. Luckily the bullet went through him and didn't go through any major organs. The stab wounds we were able to stitch up but the one on his right arm going towards his back will end up being a scar that will always be there. The other scar on his left arm will also never fade away and I honestly don't think it will look any better than it does now, which is red and raised. But I think his physical injuries aren't going to be the thing you have to deal with. I truly implore you to seek a psychiatrist for the mental damage that he will undoubtedly have when he wakes up."
"He will wake up though right?"
"Yes he will."
The doctor gives her a few more comments before he leaves them alone.
The next day Brendan's eyes opened and Cheryl screamed for a nurse. They all rushed to him but he started to panic. Cheryl had to cover him to calm him down. Throughout the day he has panic attacks and would lose consciousness. At night when everyone was asleep he finally woke up and tightened his hand that was being held by Cheryl. She didn't call for help. She gently moved onto the bed and put her head on his shoulder.
"I thought I had lost you." She cries onto his shoulder as she feels his hand grip harder. She kisses his forehead and goes to sleep.
They do this routine for a couple of days until Brendan is finally taken off the respirator and is able to breathe on his own. It's difficult for him to breath but Cheryl still thinks it's better than a machine. A few more days pass and Brendan is now speaking but he tires easily and his breath runs out quickly.
"Bren there gonna start asking questions soon since they know your awake now so we have to get out stories straight ok."
Brendan nods and is about to speak before Cheryl interrupts him.
"No no I know what you're going to say Brendan. And it's not happening. You didn't do it...I did. I killed him. I shot him dead. That's it." She starts crying as she remembers the day. It's been on a constant replay in her mind every day. "He's dead because of me." She shakes her head as tears start falling.
"Hey don't cry. I can fix this."
"You can't. I killed him."
"No you didn't."
"I did..."
"I did. Do you know what unconditional love is Chez? Unconditional love is standing in front of somebody and taking a bullet for them. Taking the hit. I'm taking that bullet for you."
She stands back up and paces the room back and forth not knowing what's going on anymore. When she finally sits back down she's made up her mind.
"I'm not gonna let you die in prison because of something I done. No way!"
"I'm not gonna die in prison. It's never gonna happen."
"You can't protect me forever."
"YES I CAN! YES I CAN! I can't let him win ok. Because of what that sick parasite did to me as a kid we have landed here. We were so close weren't we? All of us, we were so close. Nobody is gonna take your life away from you. Nobody."
She breaks down for what feels like the hundredth time. She can't look him in the eyes.
"You don't get to say what goes on all the time."
"You think I want this. I don't want this...I don't want this." Brendan sighs as he stares at his sister looking at the floor tears rolling down her face.
"I'm not that little girl anymore.."
"Don't."
"Bren please. Listen to me. Babe I am not that little girl anymore who's in the bedroom next door to you. She's all grown up. She can look after herself."
Brendan reaches out to her and puts his hand on either side of her face so she can look him in the eyes.
"Hey you got everything ahead of you now. You're life's not gonna end before it's even started."
"No sorry. I'm not letting my brother go to prison. It's not happening. You still have your whole life left. I lived already Brendan and you never gotten that opportunity to be happy. This is your chance and I'm not gonna let you give it up for me. I'm not."
"Chez you don't get it. I'll never be the same after this. Look at me. I'm scarred for life. You and I both know happiness isn't in the future for me. Only one of us has a chance of actually being something in life. And that's you."
They sit in silence. Both staring at each other. Their eyes full of sadness and pain. They hear in the distance officers speaking to one another and they realize its time. They are coming for them.
"Brendan..."
"It's time."
"No. Not yet."
"It's gonna be ok."
"This isn't happening. This isn't happening."
"Everything's gonna be just fine. I love you. I love you more than you'll ever know."
"Brendan..."
"You were the only one that never let me down. The only one."
She wipes away her tears and makes sure to look him in the eyes again. "I love you too."
He smiles at her and releases a small laugh.
"What's gonna happen now." She's sobbing uncontrollably.
"Nothing for you to worry about."
"Brendan I'm sorry."
"Don't..."
"I'm sorry for not being a better sister. For being the sister you needed."
"Oh Chez you are so much more."
They both look up when they see police officers coming up the hallway towards them. They see them holding papers as they approach and handcuffs in hand. Cheryl grabs Brendan's hand before they enter the room.
"Brendan Brady and Cheryl Brady you're both well enough to answer questions now. Your father is dead and although we don't think it was premeditated murder he was shot repeatedly and we would like to know what happened. So Cheryl you're going to be escorted back to your room while we talk to Brendan."
Cheryl holds on as an officer tries pulling her. Brendan nods for her to release him. She reluctantly does and as she walks away she looks back at him. They're eyes connect and it says everything they needed to. She mouths "bye" and Brendan smiles back in response.
She gets dragged and her view of her brother keeps getting further and further away. She struggles with the cops and gets one last look at him before the officer literally picks her up and drags her away. As she is put back in her room another officer walks in wanting to question her. The officer goes on and on about what the autopsy discovered. In Brendan's room the same routine is happening. He gets told the results from the autopsy as well. The officer in Brendan's room and the other officer in Cheryl's room both ask "So who killed Seamus Brady?"
Both Cheryl and Brendan, in separate rooms, look them clear in the eyes before saying:
"I did."