Part 14: Courage To Make Love Known

"I have to say I kind of like this first date." Jacob laughed to himself as he ran his hand through my hair before securing it around my back. I just smiled and felt a deep blush creep over my face as I buried it into his chest. "So what exactly are we going to tell Bella and Edward when we get back home?"

"The truth." I spoke lifting my head to meet his gaze.

"That will go over well." Jacob's deep laugh once again filled the hut. "Probably even more so than when Bella found out that you were the one I finally imprinted on."

"We'll do it together." I kissed his lips and he only deepened it. "Besides for now at least we are safe."

"What do you mean?" His black eyebrows furrowed into a point as he tried to understand.

"Until an outside source knows about us, Alice cannot know, and if Alice doesn't know—

"Then Edward and Bella won't." He smiled catching on to my train of thought. "So for now we can just enjoy the pleasure of being the only two people in the world who know about this."

Jacob proved his point by pulling me on top of him, I couldn't help but laugh as his arms wrapped around me once more, his hands traveling up my lower back to my face where he finally brought mine to his, presumably ending our conversation and resuming where we had last left off.

"I woke up yesterday morning with nothing in my hands, just the knowledge that all I had ever wanted was getting farther and farther away from me with every step I took. And now everything I have ever hoped for is lying beside me." Jacob grasped me tighter. "What's the sudden smile for?"

"It's just funny…I realized the same thing." I placed my head once more against his chest.

Jacob smiled too as my words rested over us. He took a deep breath, his stomach rising and falling. My fingers moving up and down his torso as if taking note of every curve and every scar.

"How did you get this one?" I asked noticing a deep toned scar that ran across his right hip.

"Uh, I guess it was a year before you were born, a group of new vampires waged war on the Cullens. I was stupid and reckless and instead of sticking to the plan I joined the fight. We thought they were all taken care of, but one attacked Leah at the last second. I jumped in to save her and he crushed that side of my body, that was the mark that was left."

I felt my body shiver, the thought of that happening again caused me to feel light-headed. I knew that Jake could feel me, his instinct was to wrap his arms around me fully, holding me as close as possible. I felt my body warm as his head rested on mine.

"It's okay, Ness. Those days are over." He assured me as his fingers grazed my arm in comfort.

"Are they?" I asked my voice unsteady as I did so.

"What's wrong?" He asked noticing my change of tone.

"Nothing, sorry, I didn't mean to—"

"Ness?" Jacob whispered my name, his face etched with concern as his body rolled onto its side, his face mere inched from mine.

I pulled myself away from him and sat up grabbing the nearest quilt and wrapped it around my body securing it gently under my arm. Jacob seemed surprised by my retreat, yet his gaze never left me.

"Scars are not always visible like yours are Jake, sometimes they are hidden deep within us."

"Ness, what are you trying to say?" He asked as he placed a hand over mine. I smiled up at him as best as I could, squeezing his hand gently before continuing.

"When I was little uncertainty plagued us. Everyone spent that first year unsure of what was going to happen to us, unsure of whether our family would be together again." I felt my body tense even now as I recalled all those memories. "I have never let go of that fear or uncertainty, Jacob. Once it was all over, once it seemed that our lives would go on as we had always wished they would my entire family, even you, entered a new way of life, a blissfully happy existence. I too, for a while, trusted that we were safe from what could happen, or better yet what might have happened if things had gone differently that day in the field."

"You're not making any sense, Nessie." Jacob held my cheek his eyes penetrating mine.

"I saw it in Aro's eyes, Jacob, that day in the meadow all those years ago. When he saw Nahuel, when he saw me, I knew it then. He wanted me."

"Ness—" Jacob tried to console me but I just continued.

"No Jacob, when Aro wants something he gets it. We got lucky last time Jake, he wasn't expected the showing, but he will return. He will—"

"Ness, you have been living with this fear, this uncertainty for all these years?" Jacob's face paled as if bearing the weight of it all. "Why didn't you ever tell me?" The disappointment held within his voice caused me to shiver once more.

"You were the one person that I was trying to protect." I took a deep breath hoping that my heart would find a quiet rhythm once more. "I was afraid Jake, I was terrified of what might happen to you if Aro ever came looking for me again."

"You thought I would become a target." He spoke breathlessly. I knew his mind was beginning to see it all clearly now. "Everything that you have just said, all of this is the reason why you have been keeping your distance from me, isn't it?" Jake's eyes found mine and I knew just by his glance that he already knew the answer. Taking a deep breath, his chest rose and fell heavily.

"I thought you were afraid of not loving me, of not wanting a future with me. I never thought it was because you believed it would never exist."

"I wanted more for you, Jake. I wanted better." I echoed the words I had spoken last night.

"So why this?" Jacob glanced at my body then at the bed we had been sharing together. "Why now?"

"Because I don't want to live in fear anymore, because in these last few weeks I realized what sort of life I can, we can have now, because I could no longer lie to you, because I wanted this, Jake. Feeling you leave knowing that I might not see you again, it was more painful than I…because I am in love with you and I don't want to run from you or from this anymore."

My eyes glanced down at the quilt underneath us and back into his black-eyed gaze. I knew he could feel my heart beat. I wiped a tear that had fallen onto my cheek and I was not quick enough to wipe away the second, it fell slowly and heavy onto the quilt that covered me.

I lowered my head closing my eyes, it hurt too much to keep his gaze. I felt his arms embrace me and I took comfort in his nearness once more. Opening my eyes I saw his fingers unwrap the quilt until there was no longer anything between us. His lips found mine in the dimming light of the day. He kissed me gently before slowly pulling away.

"You have nothing to fear, Ness. I won't let anything happen to you now or ever. You are mine, Ness, you will never be Aro's. " His eyes never left me as he spoke with such conviction that I felt myself surrendering once again to his touch.