...
I believe an apology is in order. So, guys I'm really really REALLY sorry. I said I would update again before winter break was over. I didn't. Now it is spring break. I honestly cannot tell you how sorry I am. Although, did anyone really notice? Was this story actually missed? I don't know, but at least I'm here now. Don't worry this story has not been abandoned, and I am still going to be updating.
Also, some of you guys are kinda mean.
Enough of my blabbering; enjoy the story!
"Well, I hope everyone is comfortable." Rachel tells all of the trolls and humans as they gather around her like childern at storytime. Sleepily, they all nod back at her. After all of the commotion yesterday Rachel brought everyone to her aunt's house. She would've brought them to her house, but her house is really small and her aunt's house is much bigger and nicer. At the moment, they are all gathered in the living room so Rachle can read them The Night Before Christmas. She found it very sad that none of the trolls had heard it before.
"Twas the night of Louis Tomlinson's birthday, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring, exceot for me at my computer, reading fanfiction-OW!" Rachel stopped reading, and glanced up from the book.
"That isn't how it goes!" Kayla yelled at her.
"That's how my version goes," she retorted back at her friend.
"Whatever. Let's jsut do dares. This is boring."
Rachel rolled her eyes. "Fine. But I wanna see all the trolls afterward so I can read you guys the story. Then we can watch polar express while drinking cocoa, then whent he movie is over we will go to sleep and wait for the fat, children-stallker to break into the house and leave all of us ungrateful children lots of presents."
"YAY!" Everyone cried in unison.
Now that's settled, let's get started on the dares.
Dare 1: from scatteredPhilosopher
Sollux: kiss the girl
Kanaya: kiss the girl
Nepeta: Dance to Ievan Polkka
Dave and Jade: Roleplay as a furry. For the rest. Of the chapter
Equius: Wear a maid outfit and declare that you will serve Tavros forever. Call him Young Master
:D
Sollux leans over and kisses Aradia. Kanaya does the same with Rose. Then, a Finnish song starts playing (yes I looked up what this was, you're welcome), and Nepeta stands up and starts dancing to it. When she is done Dave's and Jade's clothes are magically transformed into fursuits (yes, I looked this up too). Dave is a fox and Jade is a husky. They move off to the other side of the room to conduct... animal activities? As this occurs, Equius's clothes turn into a maid outfit. He looks as if he wants to complain, but Nepeta gives her meowrail a look and he does as the dare tells him.
D- "I shall serve the lowb100d- I mean, Young Master, forever." he declares and sits back down. His clothes go back to normal.
Next, from enderRaven:
Gamzee: go murder mode! Who will you choose to kill?
Aradia: summon undead spirits to mess with karkat
Kanaya: Make Rachel the most fashionable dress ever! And make an ugly sweater that karkat must wear.
Sollux & Feferi: Sollux, you must make Feferi eat cuttlefish. LIVING cuttlefish.
Karkat: Hang upside-down from the ceiling for the entire chapter. Any emotions you feel, you must announce to everybody.
Terezi: Lick everything you can get your hands on
Tavros & Vriska: Play the Bull vs. Matador game!
Nepeta: Who would you ship Rachel and Kayla with?
Equius: My Little Pony comes on TV. What is your reaction? :3
Eridan: Run outside yelling "I am fish! Hear me glub!"
"Okay, no murder mode. That is not allowed. I don't know about you guys, but I happen to like living and I like having my friends alive too." Rachel says. She glances down, thinking about the fact that most of them are not actually alive, but decides not to mention anything. "Aradia, you go." the rust blood nods, then closes her eyes and clears her mind. Breathing deeply, she begins to summon the undead spirits. Once they arrive, their soulless eyes sought out karkat, then they all proceed to chase him around the house, as he screams and cries like a little wriggler. After a few moments, Aradia calls them off and sits back down next to Sollux. Breathing heavily, Karkat staggers back into the room, glancing over his shoulder every so often to check that the spirits are completely gone.
"Okay, now where are we?" Kayla asks as she and Rachel try to calm Karkat down.
"I Believe I Am Supposed To Make Rachel A Dress, And Karkat An Ugly Sweater Now." Kanaya states.
"OHMYGOSH yes!" Rachel grins. "I can't wait. There's a sewing machine that jsut appearified in the kitchen, you can go in there and work in peace.
"Okay," Kanaya says, gettign up and walking out of the room.
"Sollux, now you have to make Feferi eat live cuttlefish," said Kayla.
"NOOOOO!" Feferi exclaims. "I CANT!"
"You have to," Kayla smiles devilishly.
Rachel watches her meowrail for a second. "Seriously though, some of these dares are so mena, I feel you sent them in, but then I remember that they're too good bo thought of by you."
Kayla gets really offended by this. "WHORE!"
Rachel pauses. "Wait, okay taht was really mean, I'm sorry," she says hurriedly, opening her arms for a hug. Kayla pushes her away and shoots her a "no-don't-touch-me" look.
Sollux hands a plate of live cuttlefish to Feferi. The female troll looks down at the cuttlefish sadly. "I'm sorry," she whispers. Shutting her eyes tight, she quickly shoves a couple into her mouth, chews, and swallows. "UGGGH! Please, please, please don't ever make me do that again!" she pleads to the authoresses.
Giving her a sympathetic look, Rachel says, "Don't worry I won't. Alright Karkat, get up on the ceiling," she casually adds.
"WHAT?" He shouts.
"Climb up the wall, and stick on the ceiling like a bat. You can even go to sleep and so you don't have to deal with us peasants." she tells the angry troll with a straight face. "Oh, and also, you have to announce any emotions you feel."
"I FEEL THAT THIS IS STUPID."
"That isn't a feeling, now go." Muttering swears under his breath, Karkat climbs up the wall with some magical spidy-powers shit and hungs from the ceiling. His spidy-powers go away as soon as he gets up there, but the bottoms of his shoes are super sticky, and won't give out until he is needed for another dare.
"I STILL FEEL THAT THIS IS STUPID."
"That's nice," Kayla and Rachel say.
Terezi gets up and walks around the room licking things and taking note of their flavor.
"Tavros and Vriska, go through the kitchen and up the stairs in there and you will enter a room with and awesome TV and gaming stuff where you will play The Bull VS Matador. When you're done come back down and tell us who won." Rachel tells them and sends the pair offwith a wave of her hand. Grinning evily, Vriska grabs a nervous-looking Tavros by the arm and drags him in the directionRachel sent them. "So, Nepeta. Who do you ship with us?" Rachel asks her.
"I totally ship you guys with John and Dave. Rachel and John can be adorapurr and dorky together, and Kayla and Dave can pretend they are cool together and be total badasses. It's perfect!"
D- "Nepeta. Language." Equius scolds.
"Sorry," Nepeta mutters and looks down at her lap.
"Equius, your turn," Rachel turns on the TV jsut as My Little Ponies comes on.
D- "Oh, um, this. This show is. Is very satisfying. Nepeta. Get me a towel, please." Nepeta hurries off to the bathroom upstairs to grab a few towels for Equius.
"He is such a bronie," Rachel whispers to Kayla, when she laughs and nods in agreement, and they turn off the TV.
"Eridan, go outside and run around the neighborhood yelling, 'i am fish! hear me glub!' " Kayla tells him.
Without so much as an arguement, he does as told. Everyone remaining crowds out on the front lawn and falls over laughing as they watch the fish boy go round and round.
"I am fish! Hear me glub! I am fish! Hear me glub!"
A short while later evryone comes back inside to begin the next dare.
"Rachel, I Have Finished Your Dress. Karkat, Here Is Your Sweater."
"OHMYGOSH!" Rachel squels and takes the dress and runs upstairs to try it on. Juat then, Karkat's shoes give out and her falls down. Angrily, he rips the sweater out of Kanaya's hand and pulls it over his head.
"NOW I FEEL ANGRY. ARE YOU HAPY? THAT'S FEELING."
'Yes, that is much better, Kayla tells him, as she pulls out her phone. "I am so instagraming this."
Rachel comes running back downstairs. "OHMYGOD I FEEL SO PRETTY! Look at me!" she demands. She is wearing a sparkly, mignight blue dress taht falls just above her knees, and has ruffles all down the skirt. "OHMYGOSH thatnk you soooo much, it's is so pretty!" Rachel gives Kanaya a quick hug. So where are we now? Wait, that's Karkat's sweater? That is awesome. Kayla did you instagram that?"
"Yuppers."
"Good." she smiles at Kayla and Karkat.
Vriska and Tavors come back into the room. "I won." Vriska smirks." Obviously. Everyone settles back into where they were sitting before and gets ready fo rthe next dare.
Next dare is from: Sylvikitty
Vriska...
Truth or Dare?
Dare: Kiss John. Like, seriously. Do not supress the urge. I have watched you and you WANT to. Shut up. SHUT UP, OTP.
Truth: Tell us all who you'd rather kiss... and why.
Authoress (Rachel or Kayla)...
Truth or Dare?
Dare: find xXEmistuckXx and co-write with her ONE CHAPTER. One FESTIVE chapter. I don't care how or when. Just do it.
Truth: Do you, in fact, have a crush on John (or Dave, if Kayla) now (Screw you, OTP)?
And finally...
KARKLES!
Truth or Dare?
Dare: Make EmistuckXJohn happen. Now.
Rewrite the shipping wall. Be the matchmaker.
Truth: why don't you like Nepeta? To put it in your words, "SHE'S A PERSON WITH FEELINGS YOU FUCK."
"Gladly." Vriska smirks. She reaches over and grabs John by the collar of his shirt and gives him a full-on mouth-to-mouth make out session right in front of everyone. Rachel watches, but not out of jealousy, as she mouths to herself, 'I ship it'. When she is done Vriska says, "I'm content with kissing this nerd." She shoots John a seductive glance.
Moving on. "Okay, I will do the Authoress one, becuase I am actually following xEimstuckx's Truth or Dare, and I've submitted a couple of dars myself, so I'll try to get in contact with her. For the truth, yes I do in fact, have a crush on John. And I am not ashamed to admit it." Rachel announces.
"I'LL MAKE JOHN/xEMISTUCKx HAPPEN WHEN SHE GETS HERE. BUT SINCE SHE ISN'T HER RIGHT NOW I CAN'T. AS FOR THE TRUTH, I DON'T HATE NEPETA, I MEAN, SHE'S OKAY. IT'S JUST EMBARASSING HOW MUCH SHE FLAUGHTS HER OVER-DEVELOPED CRUSH ON ME." Karkat glances at Equius, making sure he isn't going to get knocked out by the obviously stronger troll for saying that about Nepeta.
Next up is... enderRaven... again. (Well, technically the first one. The one we already did was more recent)
Karkat: Spin in circles for... let's say an hour?
Aradia/Sollux: Sloppy makeouts. GO!
Nepeta: Admit yoir feeling for Karkat to the world.
Gamzee: No more Faygo and Pie for you. But everyone else gets Faygo and pie. Your reaction?
Terezi: How does Faygo taste? Color-wise. Not the literal flavors. Like, lick the bottle, or something.
Eridan: Your weapon, Ahab's Crosshairs, has just been destroyed. There are no other weapons. And an angry dragon is attackiong you. What do you do?
Feferi: You have to eat a plate of diced cuttlefish. MUAHAHAHA! XD
Tavros: Tinkerbull is alive! But he's stuck in the middle of Vriska's Lusus's web! What do you do?
Kanaya: Your thoughts on Eridan's fashion sense? Be honest.
Equius: You have to role-play with Karkat. Whether it's been an hour or not, he can stop spinning.
"WHY DO YOU PEOPLE ALWAYS HAVE TO DARE ME THINGS?" Shouty complains as he stands up and begins to run in circles. Aradia and Sollux get up and go into the next room for some sloppy make outs. Nepeta:
"Well, efurrybody already knows about my crush on Karkaitty..."
"BrO i WoUlD bE mOtHeRfUcKiNg PiSsEd If EvErYbOdY bUt Me GoT fAyGo AnD pIe. ThAt IsN't GoNnA hApPeN tHoUgH, rIgHt?" Gamzee looks at the authoresses.
"NO!" Rachel yells quickly with wide eyes. Kayla laughs at her. "Shut up, Sober!Gamzee fucking terrifies me!"
"TH3 COLORS OF F4YGO T4ST3 OK4Y. NOWH3R3 N34R 4S GOOD 4S CH3RRY FL5VOR3D THOUGH :]"
"i wwould defeat it obvviously. it wwould only need to take one look at me and it wwould knoww howw awwesome i am and be so scared and run awway." Everyone rolls their eyes.
"RAC) (-EL! YOU PROMIS-ED M-E!"
"Yeah, yeah, calm down. You already kinda did this earlier, so you don't have to do it again," the authoress reassured her.
"oH, uH, i GUESS i WOULD, uH, tRY TO, uH, sAVE HIM, i GUESS."
"His Fahsion Sense Is Utterly Terrible And Repulsive."
"Equiusssss! Go role-play with Shouty. Shouty! Stop spinning!" Rachel commands.
"UGH, FUCKING FINALLY. WHOA. I'M REALLY FUCKING DIZZY. WHAT THE FUCK ARE WE SUPPOSED TO ROLE-PLAY?"
"Do the beauty and the beast scene, where they're ballroom dancing!" Kayla shouted.
Rachel starts laughing uncontrollably. She high fives Kayla. "That... is... prefect!" she manages once she's able to breathe again.
Sweating profusely, Equius walks over to Karkat and gently extends a hand. Karkat reaches for it, but is immediately injured when he does touches it.
"OW. FUCK. THAT HURT YOU SHITSTAIN."
"My apologies, lowb100d." Trying to be even more careful (but failing) he placed his arms around Karkat's waist.
"OW JEGUS FUCK YOURE SERIOUSLY HURTING ME YOU ASSWIPE." Karkat dropped to the flor and writhed in pain.
"Okay, that isn't good. Somebody help take him upstairs to lie down." Rachel ordered, looking at Karkat scared. Equius bends down to help- "NO NOT YOU!" Everyone shouts in unison, including Karkat.
Guys, I'm gonna stop here because this is pretty long. I'll post chapter three part 2 shortly, probably tomorrow, just to create a little suspense :)
And I WILL actually update tomorrow, I SWEAR. I already have it written, promise.
Please just don't come to my house while I'm sleeping and stab me in the eye with a butterknife. (Divergent reference, did anyone get that?)
See you next update...