Folding her arms around herself Elsie took a deep breath taking in the scent of Christmas that seemed to fill every part of the house. It was the only time she ever felt really home sick, she missed Becky most of all seeing Christmas through her eyes, the excitement, the joy. She closed her eyes briefly against the pain, she had work to do there was no time for sentimentality, not even today.

Something was wrong, he didnt know what he just knew something was wrong. He'd been watching Elsie since the beginning of December and each day they got closer to Christmas the further she pulled away from everyone. Her work was of course done as always to the highest standards but her smile as smaller and her eyes held no sparkle. Charlie didn't know what was causing it or how to fix it but he didnt like it.

Walking into the kitchen Charlie quickly looked around, it was early enough in the morning that only Beryl and the kitchen maid were up and about. He wanted to ask Beryl about Elsie, they seemed close the kitchen assistant was the only other person he'd seen Elsie spend any time with. He just didn't know how, he didn't want Beryl to get an ideas about his and Elsie's relationship but he wanted to understand, to help. He needed to.

"You're a bit early for breakfast." Beryl rolled her eyes at the look of confusion on Charlie's face. "Was there something I could help you with?"

"No. Yes, its just." He tugged at the front of his livery. "It's Elsie."

"Still be in bed if she has any sense, she's got another half hour before I go up to start knocking."

"No. I didn't mean," at Beryl's raised eyebrow he cleared his throat and straightened his back standing taller. "Is there something wrong? I've noticed a change in her, does she not like Christmas?"

"You'll have to ask her that, maybe she won't bite your head off." Charlie frowned at that, Elsie never lost her temper was always kind with even the most annoying of hall boys. "I asked her our first Christmas here, we started the same week you know?" He nodded remembering Elsie telling him. "Never seen her lose her temper like that before or since, she really wasn't pleased with me." With a sad smile she turned back to the stove and Charlie took that as his dismissal. Sighing he walked through to the dinning hall, that hadn't given any answers.

"You look deep in thought," he jumped and looked up at the sudden voice. "Sorry, I didnt mean to make you jump."

He shook his head, grateful for the smile his shock had caused. "That's ok, I was deep in thought. Worry."

"Worry?" Frowning Elsie sat down, "can I help?"

"Tell me what's wrong." Elsie's frown deepened. "You seem so sad, I want to help but I don't know how." He lowered his voice. "You can tell me anything, you do know that." It was hypocritical he knew asking her to share her secrets when he wouldn't share his own.

"Nothing is wrong." She instantly regretted her sharp tone when his face fell. "Sorry, Christmas is hard being so far away from home." It wasn't a lie, just not the whole truth. "It's difficult," he nodded waiting for her to continue. "I should get to work."

"You haven't had any breakfast," he stood as she did.

"I'm no longer hungry."

"And now I've upset you," he felt guilty he'd only wanted to help, to make her smile.

"You haven't, really I just don't wish to talk about this." He found himself reaching out, the pain in her voice was too much to ignore. "Charlie," she looked down at his fingers wrapped around her wrist. A hand resting on an arm and a handshake on his first day was most physical contact they'd had, she wondered if he could feel her pulse racing against his finger tips. "Please."

"I won't mention it again, just sit down have breakfast. Please. Its Christmas Eve, we're all going to be so busy. You need to eat."

She nodded and moved to sit down his hand slipping away from her as she did. He swallowed, his finger tips tingling. He shouldn't have touched her, he'd learnt that on his first day the feel of her cool skin against his own was too much. Made his heart and mind race.

"Happy New Year."

Elsie couldn't help laughing at the wary look Charlie wore, he'd been so patient with her, not pushing to find out what was wrong even though she knew it upset him. She still couldn't bring herself to tell him, scared that he would judge that his reaction would disappoint her.

"It's ok Charlie, I like New Year. Its different but I do enjoy it."

"Good," he smiled. "I'm glad and I'm ..."

"Please," she cut him. "Don't apologise again, let's just enjoy our New Year."

"Even if it is different," he joined in her laughter and moved closer not catching the smile that Beryl wore.

The room started to fill up as it grew closer to midnight and Chalrie found himself stood in the corner with Elsie and a few of the hall boys and youngest maids who where excited to be included.

"I remember my first year celebrating New Year as a hall boy," Elsie looked up at him, her heart skipping slightly at his contented smile. "Being allowed a small drink, not being set to bed as soon as my chores where done. It was magical," he turned his head his smile changing as their eyes met. "It's still magical, so much better than last year." He shook his head at her questioning look grateful when she gave a small nod accepting now wasnt the time.

Their eyes stayed locked as the butler started the count down and a cheer sounded around the room.

"Happy New Year."

He lowered his head pressing his lips lightly against her. "Happy New Year," he whispered and stepped back.

Her eyes closed and she took a deep breath, it had been a chaste almost innocent kiss but the affect on her was something she'd never felt before. Charlie Carson was something different, something special and that terrified her.

Standing in the yard Charlie covered his face with hands, what had he done? Why did he think kissing her was a good idea? Not only was in frowned upon for servants to have romantic relationships but he wasn't ready for that. Not with anyone but especially not Elsie, he couldn't touch the skin on her wrist without losing all logical thought. Kissing her, kissing her was a really bad idea because now he wanted to do it again and how could he look her in the eye and be her friend when he wanted so much more from her.

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